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Anon lives in a society | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/08/22(Mon)23:32:42 No.172344705 1650332937559.jpg 32 KB JPG >How about a magic trick? I'm gonna make this subway footlong TM disappear
Anonymous 08/08/22(Mon)23:32:42 No.172344705 1650332937559.jpg 32 KB JPG >How about a magic trick? I'm gonna make this subway footlong TM disappear

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Have I done it | /r/Greentext

(3 >school dance tonight >9/10 qtpi ive known for years in stunning dress >god just lemme slowdance w/ her >apparently the majority of girls i know want to dance f11 90 KB PNG >prioritymode.ahk >qtpi and I spend the whole night together >slowdance time have i done it? >she pulls me close >rest of night was euphoric >lights turn on >stack chairs >walk her to car >"youre a great guy anon" >ohshit >long_kiss.mov >at home drinking hot choccy milk w/ feels ifunny.co
(3 >school dance tonight >9/10 qtpi ive known for years in stunning dress >god just lemme slowdance w/ her >apparently the majority of girls i know want to dance f11 90 KB PNG >prioritymode.ahk >qtpi and I spend the whole night together >slowdance time have i done it? >she pulls me close >rest of night was euphoric >lights turn on >stack chairs >walk her to car >"youre a great guy anon" >ohshit >long_kiss.mov >at home drinking hot choccy milk w/ feels ifunny.co

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Anon had pokémon cards | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous F--- you, aaron. 9 KB JPG 08/09/22(Tue)00:40:15 No.883540991 >Be me >In like the 4th grade or something >Be really into pokemon cards at the height of its popularity >Been slowly creating a collection since 2nd grade from literally nothing by asking random people for a card they don't want or trading 1 card for 2 >Have some really f------ good cards >Japanese Mega Tyranitar EX Holo >Have Friend named Aaron who also really likes Pokemon >Trade and play with him regularly >One day I ask to trade for his Mega Charizard Y >Okay but he wants the Tyranitar >F--- >Everybody trades Pokemon and everybody owns pokemon >Okay, but tradebacks >Okay, Yes tradebacks. >Swap cards >mfw card is f------ fake >"W--, aaron, this is fake" 1 Reply >"Nah, anon. By all I know, its real" >"No i dont care, I want my card back" >"No, I said no tradebacks" >W-- >He runs away >I never see him again. He moved or something >F--- you, aaron. View Thread
: Anonymous F--- you, aaron. 9 KB JPG 08/09/22(Tue)00:40:15 No.883540991 >Be me >In like the 4th grade or something >Be really into pokemon cards at the height of its popularity >Been slowly creating a collection since 2nd grade from literally nothing by asking random people for a card they don't want or trading 1 card for 2 >Have some really f------ good cards >Japanese Mega Tyranitar EX Holo >Have Friend named Aaron who also really likes Pokemon >Trade and play with him regularly >One day I ask to trade for his Mega Charizard Y >Okay but he wants the Tyranitar >F--- >Everybody trades Pokemon and everybody owns pokemon >Okay, but tradebacks >Okay, Yes tradebacks. >Swap cards >mfw card is f------ fake >"W--, aaron, this is fake" 1 Reply >"Nah, anon. By all I know, its real" >"No i dont care, I want my card back" >"No, I said no tradebacks" >W-- >He runs away >I never see him again. He moved or something >F--- you, aaron. View Thread

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Anon is a NEET wagie. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >be wagie >computer is in the corner of the office where nobody can see screen >post on 4chan all day im basically a NEET but now I get paid and cant go outside as much >>50631143 # 05/01/19(Wed)08:32:11 No.50631056 >>50631191 # : Anonymous >>50631056 # >computer is in the corner of the office where nobody can see screen You realize your bosses can monitor all of your internet traffic, right? They can see every image you enlarge and read every post you make. 05/01/19(Wed)08:43:25 No.50631143 : Anonymous >>50631143 # I work for a small company, 21 employees. There is no infrastructure and I'd highly doubt that Fergus the IT guy is monitoring my internet traffic. Even if he is, hello Fergus. >>50631208 # 05/01/19(Wed)08:49:18 No.50631191 >>50631204 # >>50631214 # : Anonymous >>50631204 # F--- : Anonymous 05/01/19(Wed)08:51:30 No.50631204 >>50631191 # Hi Mark 05/01/19(Wed)08:52:31 No.50631208
Anonymous >be wagie >computer is in the corner of the office where nobody can see screen >post on 4chan all day im basically a NEET but now I get paid and cant go outside as much >>50631143 # 05/01/19(Wed)08:32:11 No.50631056 >>50631191 # : Anonymous >>50631056 # >computer is in the corner of the office where nobody can see screen You realize your bosses can monitor all of your internet traffic, right? They can see every image you enlarge and read every post you make. 05/01/19(Wed)08:43:25 No.50631143 : Anonymous >>50631143 # I work for a small company, 21 employees. There is no infrastructure and I'd highly doubt that Fergus the IT guy is monitoring my internet traffic. Even if he is, hello Fergus. >>50631208 # 05/01/19(Wed)08:49:18 No.50631191 >>50631204 # >>50631214 # : Anonymous >>50631204 # F--- : Anonymous 05/01/19(Wed)08:51:30 No.50631204 >>50631191 # Hi Mark 05/01/19(Wed)08:52:31 No.50631208

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Anon tries Reddit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 83 KB JPG 11/28/18 (Wed)18:37:23 No.786057786 >be me >go on Reddit >see that a post has gold and silver >wot.jpg >ffw a few weeks >see a post that made me laugh >click on button to give gold >a menu comes up to buy gold >confusion.jpg >click on buy gold >asks for a payment method >what the f--- >some f------ actually spend money to give a medal to posts and comments that they enjoy >mfw
Anonymous 83 KB JPG 11/28/18 (Wed)18:37:23 No.786057786 >be me >go on Reddit >see that a post has gold and silver >wot.jpg >ffw a few weeks >see a post that made me laugh >click on button to give gold >a menu comes up to buy gold >confusion.jpg >click on buy gold >asks for a payment method >what the f--- >some f------ actually spend money to give a medal to posts and comments that they enjoy >mfw

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Anon is different | /r/Greentext

File: 1352472167068.jpg-(105 KB, 960x640, image.jpg) Anonymous (ID: XOUJKHrL) 11/09/12 (Fri)09:42:47 >Be in preschool >Uncircumcised >Kid notices in bathroom >Later that day in a group with other boys and girls >Kid says my pee pee is different >Other kids want to see >Show them >They want to touch it >why not >Let them >They pull back my foreskin repeatedly and touch the head >Feelsgoodman.jpg >My pee pee gets bigger >One of the little girls screams >Female teacher comes over >ohshit >The kids' parents are informed And that was the end of my teaching career
File: 1352472167068.jpg-(105 KB, 960x640, image.jpg) Anonymous (ID: XOUJKHrL) 11/09/12 (Fri)09:42:47 >Be in preschool >Uncircumcised >Kid notices in bathroom >Later that day in a group with other boys and girls >Kid says my pee pee is different >Other kids want to see >Show them >They want to touch it >why not >Let them >They pull back my foreskin repeatedly and touch the head >Feelsgoodman.jpg >My pee pee gets bigger >One of the little girls screams >Female teacher comes over >ohshit >The kids' parents are informed And that was the end of my teaching career

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Anon is normal (?) | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.08 MB PNG 08/08/22(Mon)15:17:10 No.69730612 Is this normal? >Meet random perrson on game >We hit it off, immediately become good friends >The next day i don't wanna talk to her anymore and consider blocking Whats wrong with me? I just feel like i just change my personality to talk to ppl and it makes me feel bad.
: Anonymous 1.08 MB PNG 08/08/22(Mon)15:17:10 No.69730612 Is this normal? >Meet random perrson on game >We hit it off, immediately become good friends >The next day i don't wanna talk to her anymore and consider blocking Whats wrong with me? I just feel like i just change my personality to talk to ppl and it makes me feel bad.

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Anon isn't a sheep | /r/Greentext

Anonymous OM 225 KB JPG 08/08/22(Mon)18:17:29 No.883539893 >As dozens of onlookers looked on, some with tears in their eyes, a barefoot man in an orange jumpsuit and red MAGA cap sobbed in a cage in a convention center in Dallas, Texas. >Attendees at CPAC, the massive annual conservative activist conference, were given bluetooth headphones, emblazoned with the word "silence," where they were invited to listen to audio accounts from January 6 defendants who have been jailed due to the Capitol riot. >Some spectators wept. Some threw money into the cage. Others came up close to mutter words of comfort and support to the emotionally distraught man inside, who was alternating sitting on a bare cot with his head in his hands, and writing sad slogans on a blackboard like "Where is Everyone?" cage https://www.vice.com/en/article/y3ppy5/cpac- marjorie-taylor-greene-and-the-capitol-riot-rage- Yeah, totally not a cult.
Anonymous OM 225 KB JPG 08/08/22(Mon)18:17:29 No.883539893 >As dozens of onlookers looked on, some with tears in their eyes, a barefoot man in an orange jumpsuit and red MAGA cap sobbed in a cage in a convention center in Dallas, Texas. >Attendees at CPAC, the massive annual conservative activist conference, were given bluetooth headphones, emblazoned with the word "silence," where they were invited to listen to audio accounts from January 6 defendants who have been jailed due to the Capitol riot. >Some spectators wept. Some threw money into the cage. Others came up close to mutter words of comfort and support to the emotionally distraught man inside, who was alternating sitting on a bare cot with his head in his hands, and writing sad slogans on a blackboard like "Where is Everyone?" cage https://www.vice.com/en/article/y3ppy5/cpac- marjorie-taylor-greene-and-the-capitol-riot-rage- Yeah, totally not a cult.

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Anon protects nephew from killer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 124 KB JPG 05/16/18 (Wed)22:25:34 No.768814065 ITT: spooky stories >be me >serial killer kills my brother in law >tries to kill his son but he failed somehow >his son is given to me >years later, the serial killer finds my house >sends threats in the mail, s--- about how he's gonna take him away >I move houses so he won't know my address >he f------ finds my house again >more mail >I move to an island >he still f------ knows >he comes to the door >he's f------ huge >I take out my shorty, but he breaks it in one hand >ohshit.bat >he walks up to my nephew >the twisted f--- gives him a cake >"you're a wizard harry" Turns out this wasn't the serial killer after all
Anonymous 124 KB JPG 05/16/18 (Wed)22:25:34 No.768814065 ITT: spooky stories >be me >serial killer kills my brother in law >tries to kill his son but he failed somehow >his son is given to me >years later, the serial killer finds my house >sends threats in the mail, s--- about how he's gonna take him away >I move houses so he won't know my address >he f------ finds my house again >more mail >I move to an island >he still f------ knows >he comes to the door >he's f------ huge >I take out my shorty, but he breaks it in one hand >ohshit.bat >he walks up to my nephew >the twisted f--- gives him a cake >"you're a wizard harry" Turns out this wasn't the serial killer after all

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Anon destroys the earth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 47 KB JPG 04/12/22(Tue)09:13:06 No.68186041 >i know what you did anon >you farted >and i can smell the greenhouse gases >anon, you can't be destroying the planet like that. your butt is releasing dangerous greenhouse gases >if you keep farting you're going to cause the earth to warm up too fast >please stop farting >do it for me anon wat do?
: Anonymous 47 KB JPG 04/12/22(Tue)09:13:06 No.68186041 >i know what you did anon >you farted >and i can smell the greenhouse gases >anon, you can't be destroying the planet like that. your butt is releasing dangerous greenhouse gases >if you keep farting you're going to cause the earth to warm up too fast >please stop farting >do it for me anon wat do?

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Anon needs help | /r/Greentext

08/07/22(Sun)22:35:55 No.14737469 HOW TO SOUNDPROOF MY WINDOW AC UNIT FROM LETTING ALL THAT F------ NOISE IN FROM MY STUPID BOOMER NEIGHBOR WHO HAS BEEN BLOWING HIS C--- WITH A LEAFBLOWER FOR THE PAST 3 HOURS NOW IN HIS BACKYWARD BEFORE I BEAT THE F--- OUTTA HIM : Anonymous 215 KB PNG
08/07/22(Sun)22:35:55 No.14737469 HOW TO SOUNDPROOF MY WINDOW AC UNIT FROM LETTING ALL THAT F------ NOISE IN FROM MY STUPID BOOMER NEIGHBOR WHO HAS BEEN BLOWING HIS C--- WITH A LEAFBLOWER FOR THE PAST 3 HOURS NOW IN HIS BACKYWARD BEFORE I BEAT THE F--- OUTTA HIM : Anonymous 215 KB PNG

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Now Anon will be nominated for Noble prize | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 50 KB JPG 08/08/22(Mon)11:38:35 No.14738939 I've made a scientific discovery today. Clapping your hands is actually just hitting yourself. 12 Replies / 3 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 50 KB JPG 08/08/22(Mon)11:38:35 No.14738939 I've made a scientific discovery today. Clapping your hands is actually just hitting yourself. 12 Replies / 3 Images View Thread

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good going 4chan. you ruined anon. | /r/Greentext

SSC uprem Y.BAny Ne essa say. B ans Y SC 2xy4ijaxzwz61.jpg 35 KB JPG 20 ecess A Tea Viny By I had a nightmare about the austrian painter kicking me into my dry pool, and me not being able to get out because I kept slipping, then he threw yeezys at my face and said "use real shoes c---" This is not okay and I blame 4chan for this.
SSC uprem Y.BAny Ne essa say. B ans Y SC 2xy4ijaxzwz61.jpg 35 KB JPG 20 ecess A Tea Viny By I had a nightmare about the austrian painter kicking me into my dry pool, and me not being able to get out because I kept slipping, then he threw yeezys at my face and said "use real shoes c---" This is not okay and I blame 4chan for this.

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Anon Is Fat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 116 KB JPG 08/08/22 (Mon)21:20:59 No.69734910 >be fat >want to lose weight >find out that you'll have lose skin and look just as s--- >lose motivation to lose weight
: Anonymous 116 KB JPG 08/08/22 (Mon)21:20:59 No.69734910 >be fat >want to lose weight >find out that you'll have lose skin and look just as s--- >lose motivation to lose weight

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Anon likes the 2nd amendment | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/09/22 (Tue)07:41:38 No.54712141 TARE XM177E2-C7-2022-04-24 (Right stock-collapsed).jpg 3.75 MB JPG My rifle comes with its own Creedence Clearwater Revival soundtrack
Anonymous 08/09/22 (Tue)07:41:38 No.54712141 TARE XM177E2-C7-2022-04-24 (Right stock-collapsed).jpg 3.75 MB JPG My rifle comes with its own Creedence Clearwater Revival soundtrack

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Anon is 16 | /r/Greentext

Girl's sexual fantasies Boy's sexual fantasies 1.04 MB PNG >be me >16 working at a movie theater >was a scene kid who was pretty popular and got cute scene girls >only m----------- to have a car >have 22yo assistant manager ask for a ride home >shes kind of plain and chubby but had huge t---. Not the type of girl I liked at the time >you would also be made fun of for porking a chubster >pull up to her apartment and she just pops out her t--- >ask if I want to come inside >horny teen mind explodes but tell her I have a gf >tells me no one will find out and thats all it took >as soon as we walk in she just pulls down my pants and sits me down on her couch >sucks my d--- then pushes me on the floor >shoves my d--- in her. It feels so wet and warm. My skinny scene gf was tight to the point of being kind of painful and the sex could only last a few minutes before I had to stop. >this girl was riding me like a horse >she was grabbing my head and making me suck her t--- >tell her Im gonna c-- and she holds my hands above my head and grinds harder >bust with the force of 1000suns View Thread
Girl's sexual fantasies Boy's sexual fantasies 1.04 MB PNG >be me >16 working at a movie theater >was a scene kid who was pretty popular and got cute scene girls >only m----------- to have a car >have 22yo assistant manager ask for a ride home >shes kind of plain and chubby but had huge t---. Not the type of girl I liked at the time >you would also be made fun of for porking a chubster >pull up to her apartment and she just pops out her t--- >ask if I want to come inside >horny teen mind explodes but tell her I have a gf >tells me no one will find out and thats all it took >as soon as we walk in she just pulls down my pants and sits me down on her couch >sucks my d--- then pushes me on the floor >shoves my d--- in her. It feels so wet and warm. My skinny scene gf was tight to the point of being kind of painful and the sex could only last a few minutes before I had to stop. >this girl was riding me like a horse >she was grabbing my head and making me suck her t--- >tell her Im gonna c-- and she holds my hands above my head and grinds harder >bust with the force of 1000suns View Thread

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