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Good idea? Bad idea? | Bumble

I probably shouldn't admit this, but I'm lying about my height. I'm actually only 6' 3/4"

I probably shouldn't admit this, but I'm lying about my height. I'm actually only 6' 3/4"

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A poetic tribute to every cliche dating profile. | Bumble

The Eligible Bachelor "Fluent in sarcasm," my bio declares. "A partner in crime," a big to ensnare. Here are my biceps, check out my glutes. Spelling and grammar-couldn't give two hoots. Here is my niece, not my secret child, To detract from the pics where I'm hammered and high. Motorcycles, cigarettes and pills, All things I love, plus my Netflix & chills. Here's me surrounded by buddies galore, Just like "Where's Waldo?" I'm the eyesore. I'm going to France, you gotta come with, Damn the plane's booked-come to the gym. Ethical non-monogamy is my life, I've just got to get around to telling my wife. I hope you like kink, and an alpha male- I'm freaky in bed when Viagra's not stale. I'm a skydiver, weightlifter, runner, and hiker Mountain climber, camel rider, monk and a biker. You better keep up because I am no joke I'm one more activity away from a stroke. I'm tall if you're decent, don't wear stilettos, My ego intact, we avoid armageddon. And don't be a pen pal-I want to meet My bedroom, at midnight, your sexy feet. If you don't like plan A, I've got plan B- Walk in 5 degree weather, freezing with me. I'd buy you a coffee, but I don't have my wallet I donated to Red Cross when somebody stole it. I'm willing to travel, I'll move in tomorrow, My mother approves-she says I'm a horror. But I'm a really nice guy, we just finish last- at least in relationships, not in the bed. Look at my abs as I hold my big fish, I hope you're halfway ready for a steamy tryst. Just one more thing to add to my allure- I happen to be an entrepreneur.

The Eligible Bachelor "Fluent in sarcasm," my bio declares. "A partner in crime," a big to ensnare. Here are my biceps, check out my glutes. Spelling and grammar-couldn't give two hoots. Here is my niece, not my secret child, To detract from the pics where I'm hammered and high. Motorcycles, cigarettes and pills, All things I love, plus my Netflix & chills. Here's me surrounded by buddies galore, Just like "Where's Waldo?" I'm the eyesore. I'm going to France, you gotta come with, Damn the plane's booked-come to the gym. Ethical non-monogamy is my life, I've just got to get around to telling my wife. I hope you like kink, and an alpha male- I'm freaky in bed when Viagra's not stale. I'm a skydiver, weightlifter, runner, and hiker Mountain climber, camel rider, monk and a biker. You better keep up because I am no joke I'm one more activity away from a stroke. I'm tall if you're decent, don't wear stilettos, My ego intact, we avoid armageddon. And don't be a pen pal-I want to meet My bedroom, at midnight, your sexy feet. If you don't like plan A, I've got plan B- Walk in 5 degree weather, freezing with me. I'd buy you a coffee, but I don't have my wallet I donated to Red Cross when somebody stole it. I'm willing to travel, I'll move in tomorrow, My mother approves-she says I'm a horror. But I'm a really nice guy, we just finish last- at least in relationships, not in the bed. Look at my abs as I hold my big fish, I hope you're halfway ready for a steamy tryst. Just one more thing to add to my allure- I happen to be an entrepreneur.

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i give up | Bumble

12:35 Danielle The way to win me over is i like being taken out and treated right, don't be overly nice, be yourself, and give me attention, not too much attention though 71

12:35 Danielle The way to win me over is i like being taken out and treated right, don't be overly nice, be yourself, and give me attention, not too much attention though 71

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I need to charge my phone but what does he mean by “looking for a long term relationship” but also “...

1:06 - Bumble 6' 1" 0-0 → Sometimes Active Graduate degree No * Man Not sure Don't have kids I'm looking for QA long-term relationship Q Intimacy, without commitment 3 10

1:06 - Bumble 6' 1" 0-0 → Sometimes Active Graduate degree No * Man Not sure Don't have kids I'm looking for QA long-term relationship Q Intimacy, without commitment 3 10

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Am I using the wrong opening Move? | Bumble

11:13 1 < Hi there Your Opening Move Can you carry on a conversation?! If so, make this interesting. Yesterday 97

11:13 1 < Hi there Your Opening Move Can you carry on a conversation?! If so, make this interesting. Yesterday 97

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Bumble India is easy | Bumble

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Why tho | Bumble

Bumble Cosas que os Perros pueden unir GABB 10 ΤΟ

Bumble Cosas que os Perros pueden unir GABB 10 ΤΟ

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This makes no sense lmao | Bumble

I'm looking for QA long-term relationship Q Intimacy, without commitment Ambition Generosity Loyalty

I'm looking for QA long-term relationship Q Intimacy, without commitment Ambition Generosity Loyalty

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The bar is low | Bumble

Swipe right if you Are Real My causes and communities Human rights

Swipe right if you Are Real My causes and communities Human rights

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Roast this. | Bumble

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Proof That Women Do It Too | Bumble

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What should I change, any help is appreciated | Bumble

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App question - Liked you page | Bumble

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What do you make of this | Bumble

Everything Sheldon? Your Opening Move something you secretly like about yourself, but wouldn't say out loud? Today Whoaa Mr. Cool guy I'm not totally sure what you look like but you kinda remind me of the big bang theory guy What a great show right??? Yeah Yea I have big Sheldon energy The great show comment was sarcasm So nerdy? Delivered

Everything Sheldon? Your Opening Move something you secretly like about yourself, but wouldn't say out loud? Today Whoaa Mr. Cool guy I'm not totally sure what you look like but you kinda remind me of the big bang theory guy What a great show right??? Yeah Yea I have big Sheldon energy The great show comment was sarcasm So nerdy? Delivered

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I just wanted to know what you do for work.. I sorry | Bumble

Mind My Goddamn Business at None Of Your Business My bio The regular man will sacrifice you

Mind My Goddamn Business at None Of Your Business My bio The regular man will sacrifice you

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This made me laugh…. | Bumble

My bio Swipe left: ADMIT ONE Kiss dogs or sleep with pets. Wear dirty clothes Do not smell good Have no social skills

My bio Swipe left: ADMIT ONE Kiss dogs or sleep with pets. Wear dirty clothes Do not smell good Have no social skills

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