I think a more accurate version would be:

Communism: You had two cows. Now they belong to the people.

Socialism: You have two cows. Just don't expect to make much profit.

Capitalism: The landowner has two cows. You still have to do all the work.

Monarchism: The nobility has two cows. You still have to do all the work. And they probably slept with your wife.

Democracy: You have two cows. But somebody, somewhere is going to put a stop to that.

Anarchism: You had two cows. Now they belong to the people that shot you.

Anarcho capitalism: The company that enslaved you has two cows. You still have to do all the work. And they definitely slept with your wife.

Those are some nice cows you got there
sure would be a shame if
somebody else wanted them