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Anon watches a movie | /r/Greentext

File: y.yy.yy.yy.yy.jpg (910 KB, 1368x2097) To Life! Fiddler on the Roof deser A taco a stay herps the ducio say ■ Anonymous (ID: 8nQ3YLGT) 06/24/23(Sat)02:10:36 No.431868892 >>431869125 >>431869444 >>431869733 >Movie about Jews >One of the first songs is about money How did they get away with this? Like imagine if any show had a black guy singing about fried chicken and watermelon. Anonymous (ID: OZuPmo7G) 06/24/23(Sat)02:12:26 No.431869125 File: n------ - 1568785850311.gif (2.52 MB, 350x204) >>431868892 (OP) >> Anonymous (ID: RzeCcyt5) 06/24/23(Sat)02:14:39 No.431869444 File: mqdefault.jpg (8 KB, 320x180) Anonymous (ID: 8nQ3YLGT) 06/24/23(Sat)02:17:01 No.431869733 File: tacooo.png (1.56 MB, 1061x1062) dibba dibba dibba dum" >>431868892 (OP) >singing about fried chicken and watermelon. Why do you think Uncle Remus was so happy? >>431868892 (OP) >New Disney movie about Mexico is in theaters >OMGoodness Latinxxxx representation >Take my wife's son to go see it >Guy in sombrero introduces Mexico City >He then begins to sing "If I had a taco, ya ba dibba dibba dibba
File: y.yy.yy.yy.yy.jpg (910 KB, 1368x2097) To Life! Fiddler on the Roof deser A taco a stay herps the ducio say ■ Anonymous (ID: 8nQ3YLGT) 06/24/23(Sat)02:10:36 No.431868892 >>431869125 >>431869444 >>431869733 >Movie about Jews >One of the first songs is about money How did they get away with this? Like imagine if any show had a black guy singing about fried chicken and watermelon. Anonymous (ID: OZuPmo7G) 06/24/23(Sat)02:12:26 No.431869125 File: n------ - 1568785850311.gif (2.52 MB, 350x204) >>431868892 (OP) >> Anonymous (ID: RzeCcyt5) 06/24/23(Sat)02:14:39 No.431869444 File: mqdefault.jpg (8 KB, 320x180) Anonymous (ID: 8nQ3YLGT) 06/24/23(Sat)02:17:01 No.431869733 File: tacooo.png (1.56 MB, 1061x1062) dibba dibba dibba dum" >>431868892 (OP) >singing about fried chicken and watermelon. Why do you think Uncle Remus was so happy? >>431868892 (OP) >New Disney movie about Mexico is in theaters >OMGoodness Latinxxxx representation >Take my wife's son to go see it >Guy in sombrero introduces Mexico City >He then begins to sing "If I had a taco, ya ba dibba dibba dibba

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Anon's gf works at walmart | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/25/23(Sun)12:37:36 No.186749347 >Go to the kinoplex with my bros 33 KB JPG >Arrive early before the movie starts >They asks me if I'm dating anyone at the moment >"Yeah bro, met this girl in my route" >"That's cool, man. What does she do?" >"She works at a Walmart, stocking merchandise" >They bust out laughing so loud everyone could hear >"Damn bro, they couldn't even put her in the front of the store, they put her in the warehouse" >"At least date a target chick, bro" >"Hey man, are you going through a hard time right now"
: Anonymous 06/25/23(Sun)12:37:36 No.186749347 >Go to the kinoplex with my bros 33 KB JPG >Arrive early before the movie starts >They asks me if I'm dating anyone at the moment >"Yeah bro, met this girl in my route" >"That's cool, man. What does she do?" >"She works at a Walmart, stocking merchandise" >They bust out laughing so loud everyone could hear >"Damn bro, they couldn't even put her in the front of the store, they put her in the warehouse" >"At least date a target chick, bro" >"Hey man, are you going through a hard time right now"

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Anon tries a new cologne | /r/Greentext

more pee boules. who else fell for it? Anonymous 06/20/23(Tue)12:18:51 No.73739903 i fell for the urine as cologne meme >spend 3 days peeing in jars instead of the toilet >don't drink water so it's more powerful >spray myself with it and dab it on before work yesterday to maxx on pheromones >people noticeably avoided me more >wore the same clothes again today and sprayed some more on >i thought it needed time to calibrate >people literally stepped away when i walked towards them, multiple girls wrinkled their noses and ignored me completely >manager just pulled me aside and said i needed to leave as i was upsetting the other workers >told me to shower before i come back you f------ lied to me.
more pee boules. who else fell for it? Anonymous 06/20/23(Tue)12:18:51 No.73739903 i fell for the urine as cologne meme >spend 3 days peeing in jars instead of the toilet >don't drink water so it's more powerful >spray myself with it and dab it on before work yesterday to maxx on pheromones >people noticeably avoided me more >wore the same clothes again today and sprayed some more on >i thought it needed time to calibrate >people literally stepped away when i walked towards them, multiple girls wrinkled their noses and ignored me completely >manager just pulled me aside and said i needed to leave as i was upsetting the other workers >told me to shower before i come back you f------ lied to me.

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Bottomless | /r/Greentext

James Teresa @meta_nomad Al art might suck, but this Al greentext is good stuff. write me a 4chan greentext >be me >bottomless pit supervisor >in charge of making sure the bottomless pit is, in fact, bottomless >occasionally have to go down there and check if the bottomless pit is still bottomless >one day i go down there and the bottomless pit is no longer bottomless >the bottom of the bottomless pit is now just a regular pit >distress.jpg >ask my boss what to do >he says "just make it bottomless again" >i say "how" >he says "i don't know, you're the supervisor" >rage.jpg >quit my job >become a regular pit supervisor >first day on the job, go to the new hole >its bottomless 7:43 AM 14 Jun 22. Twitter for Android
James Teresa @meta_nomad Al art might suck, but this Al greentext is good stuff. write me a 4chan greentext >be me >bottomless pit supervisor >in charge of making sure the bottomless pit is, in fact, bottomless >occasionally have to go down there and check if the bottomless pit is still bottomless >one day i go down there and the bottomless pit is no longer bottomless >the bottom of the bottomless pit is now just a regular pit >distress.jpg >ask my boss what to do >he says "just make it bottomless again" >i say "how" >he says "i don't know, you're the supervisor" >rage.jpg >quit my job >become a regular pit supervisor >first day on the job, go to the new hole >its bottomless 7:43 AM 14 Jun 22. Twitter for Android

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Anon suggests superior input device | /r/Greentext

13m (6/22 7:04). 641567156 1 Reply >learn from this mistake, and use superior keyboard controls on the next sub >sub dies anyway >last message sent "WWWWWWwwwwwwwwww wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWWDDDDDDD DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSWWW wwwwwww wwwwwwwwww wwwwww"
13m (6/22 7:04). 641567156 1 Reply >learn from this mistake, and use superior keyboard controls on the next sub >sub dies anyway >last message sent "WWWWWWwwwwwwwwww wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWWDDDDDDD DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSWWW wwwwwww wwwwwwwwww wwwwww"

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Wagner hires a hoi4 streamer | /r/Greentext

>Wagner hires a HO14 streamer to consult >Starts snaking and capturing as many VPs as possible while trucking to Moscow
>Wagner hires a HO14 streamer to consult >Starts snaking and capturing as many VPs as possible while trucking to Moscow

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Anon forgets his favourite toy..... | /r/Greentext

>be me >8 years old >want to know what happens to poop if you don't flush it down the toilet >s--- in mcdonalds happy meal toy >leave it on the shelf in my closet >few months later >forgot all about the toy >woken up at 2 am by a loud ass bang followed by the WORST smell of s--- possible >parents are also woken up and are panicking >911 is called >police arrive and explosion is traced back to closet >closet is opened >s--- everywhere >suddenly remember the mcdonalds toy >turns out the mcdonalds toy container was air tight, and kept all the gas in from decomposition until the thing reached critical pressure and exploded >entire second floor now smells like s--- >mfw
>be me >8 years old >want to know what happens to poop if you don't flush it down the toilet >s--- in mcdonalds happy meal toy >leave it on the shelf in my closet >few months later >forgot all about the toy >woken up at 2 am by a loud ass bang followed by the WORST smell of s--- possible >parents are also woken up and are panicking >911 is called >police arrive and explosion is traced back to closet >closet is opened >s--- everywhere >suddenly remember the mcdonalds toy >turns out the mcdonalds toy container was air tight, and kept all the gas in from decomposition until the thing reached critical pressure and exploded >entire second floor now smells like s--- >mfw

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Anon suspects | /r/Greentext

IMG_2412.jpg 60 KB JPG >invades The Ukraine >uninvades The Ukraine >invades Russia >uninvades Russia >reinvades The Ukraine What did he mean by this?
IMG_2412.jpg 60 KB JPG >invades The Ukraine >uninvades The Ukraine >invades Russia >uninvades Russia >reinvades The Ukraine What did he mean by this?

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Anon paid extra | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 88 KB JPG 04/05/18(Thu)08:02:15 No.44422418 >paid a h----- an extra $10 to shout "yamete onii- chan!!~~" when i f----- her Best use of that $10 ever
: Anonymous 88 KB JPG 04/05/18(Thu)08:02:15 No.44422418 >paid a h----- an extra $10 to shout "yamete onii- chan!!~~" when i f----- her Best use of that $10 ever

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Anon explains what he would do if aliens landed on earth. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/29/16(Fri)09:37:15 No.29776949 ► >>29776957 >>29776976 >>29777012 >>29777049 >>29777061 >>29777086 >>29777092 >>29777127 >>29777135 >>29777568 >>29777597 >>29777608 >>29777651 >>29777737 File: 1459301488464.jpg (6 KB, 220x232) >>29776622 (OP) # Seriously? I'd r--- them. Honest to god I'm not just chatting s--- here I would honest to god sexually assault them. Think about it. These Alions are so advanced they can fly 90 billion light- years just to come break into my house and f--- around a bit. The concept of sex probably doesn't exist anymore in their culture. They probably clone each other and birth new Aliums in some kind of fake mechanical womb just because it's more practical. Sexual contact will be the most bizarre concept to them and they'll be terrified beyond belief. >Aliens enter house through chimney or whatever >they're here to study us, find out our weaknesses >I'm awake and I'm ready >I know they're in the house >I lie in bed trying to stifle the giggle >the door opens I can hear them tip toeing in whispering to each other in their filthy aleone tongues >"crbaatt hork ritizzlebbrtt ssskkre kkrreeerrrkk shawaddywaddy" >my c--- is thrashing around under the covers like a greyhound waiting to be let lose >they reach the foot of the bed >fling the covers off and jump up revealing my throbbing member >they jup back aghast >headbutt the leader and throw him/her/shim/xe on the floor pulling down their space pants and shoving my big fat Patriotic c--- up their space bumholes >gaze up at the others with an expression like pic related >"You're next"
Anonymous 04/29/16(Fri)09:37:15 No.29776949 ► >>29776957 >>29776976 >>29777012 >>29777049 >>29777061 >>29777086 >>29777092 >>29777127 >>29777135 >>29777568 >>29777597 >>29777608 >>29777651 >>29777737 File: 1459301488464.jpg (6 KB, 220x232) >>29776622 (OP) # Seriously? I'd r--- them. Honest to god I'm not just chatting s--- here I would honest to god sexually assault them. Think about it. These Alions are so advanced they can fly 90 billion light- years just to come break into my house and f--- around a bit. The concept of sex probably doesn't exist anymore in their culture. They probably clone each other and birth new Aliums in some kind of fake mechanical womb just because it's more practical. Sexual contact will be the most bizarre concept to them and they'll be terrified beyond belief. >Aliens enter house through chimney or whatever >they're here to study us, find out our weaknesses >I'm awake and I'm ready >I know they're in the house >I lie in bed trying to stifle the giggle >the door opens I can hear them tip toeing in whispering to each other in their filthy aleone tongues >"crbaatt hork ritizzlebbrtt ssskkre kkrreeerrrkk shawaddywaddy" >my c--- is thrashing around under the covers like a greyhound waiting to be let lose >they reach the foot of the bed >fling the covers off and jump up revealing my throbbing member >they jup back aghast >headbutt the leader and throw him/her/shim/xe on the floor pulling down their space pants and shoving my big fat Patriotic c--- up their space bumholes >gaze up at the others with an expression like pic related >"You're next"

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Multiple choice madness | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 268 KB JPG 06/21/23(Wed)02:25:03 No.186580227 >produces personalized gigakino every night for you >ALL >FOR >FREE : Anonymous 06/21/23(Wed)02:34:08 No.186580545 >its an "anon didnt study for the final exam and is failing every class despite graduating high school a decade ago" episode yawn >>186581159 # >>186582339 # >>186583561 # >>186583570 # >>186586879 # >>186587660 # >>186587909 # >>186588682 # >>186594390 #
: Anonymous 268 KB JPG 06/21/23(Wed)02:25:03 No.186580227 >produces personalized gigakino every night for you >ALL >FOR >FREE : Anonymous 06/21/23(Wed)02:34:08 No.186580545 >its an "anon didnt study for the final exam and is failing every class despite graduating high school a decade ago" episode yawn >>186581159 # >>186582339 # >>186583561 # >>186583570 # >>186586879 # >>186587660 # >>186587909 # >>186588682 # >>186594390 #

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4chan does things to anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/24/23(Sat)22:08:09 No.641833806 - 1643601172368.jpg ✩ (18 KB, 253x253) google yandex iqdb wait saucenao >>641831842 >do nothing but surf 4chan during quarantine >gf is annoying me >say "dilate t-----" to her before I can stop myself This place does things to you
Anonymous 06/24/23(Sat)22:08:09 No.641833806 - 1643601172368.jpg ✩ (18 KB, 253x253) google yandex iqdb wait saucenao >>641831842 >do nothing but surf 4chan during quarantine >gf is annoying me >say "dilate t-----" to her before I can stop myself This place does things to you

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Anon is still waiting for some black macarons | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous NGAT >wake up >no black gf day ruined 05/13/23(Sat)12:43:10 No.73299631 eicDmKl.jpg 195 KB JPG
: Anonymous NGAT >wake up >no black gf day ruined 05/13/23(Sat)12:43:10 No.73299631 eicDmKl.jpg 195 KB JPG

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Anon is a Chad look-alike | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/08/18(Thu)09:16:35 No.43709546 >be me >chad look-alike >basically just have good looks and give good first impression, but still feel like 4chan is my people >get sick of people treating my autist friends like s--- MEMINT 1002 KB PNG >start telling stacies who s--- on autists that they have to f--- my friends before they can f--- me >mostly get called a freak but it's still fun for the s---- and giggles >mfw one of the girls actually says ok and actually does it >end up being too disgusted with her to have sex with her >she keeps having sex with friends anyway >mfw am chad robin hood
: Anonymous 03/08/18(Thu)09:16:35 No.43709546 >be me >chad look-alike >basically just have good looks and give good first impression, but still feel like 4chan is my people >get sick of people treating my autist friends like s--- MEMINT 1002 KB PNG >start telling stacies who s--- on autists that they have to f--- my friends before they can f--- me >mostly get called a freak but it's still fun for the s---- and giggles >mfw one of the girls actually says ok and actually does it >end up being too disgusted with her to have sex with her >she keeps having sex with friends anyway >mfw am chad robin hood

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Anon’s success story | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Personal success story 04/03/23 (Mon)04:03:56 No.896953941 >Be me >unattractive + short manlet throughout childhood and beginning of highschool >very insecure about looks and little to no success with women >covid hits and school closes >grow 6 inches in 5 months during quarantine(now 6"), fix hair cut, fix style >actually somewhat conventionally attractive now >covid starts to die down and quarantines are lifted >go to a bonfire with some loose acquaintances from school and my best friend >all sitting around the fire and my friend mentions that I got tall over quarantine >immediately all the girls ask me to stand up so they can see for themselves 72 KB JPG >oblige >I s--- you not the first words that were said were "oh my god, you're like, a person now" >the girl immediately apologizes for the wording and clarifies she didn't mean it like that >too late >turn evil >now my freshman year of college >commence villainy >download dating apps for hookups >meet up with random girl and do the thing >immediately after I tell her "I think I might be gay" >watch the life drain out of her >done this three times now and I think I'm starting to heal my inner child
Anonymous Personal success story 04/03/23 (Mon)04:03:56 No.896953941 >Be me >unattractive + short manlet throughout childhood and beginning of highschool >very insecure about looks and little to no success with women >covid hits and school closes >grow 6 inches in 5 months during quarantine(now 6"), fix hair cut, fix style >actually somewhat conventionally attractive now >covid starts to die down and quarantines are lifted >go to a bonfire with some loose acquaintances from school and my best friend >all sitting around the fire and my friend mentions that I got tall over quarantine >immediately all the girls ask me to stand up so they can see for themselves 72 KB JPG >oblige >I s--- you not the first words that were said were "oh my god, you're like, a person now" >the girl immediately apologizes for the wording and clarifies she didn't mean it like that >too late >turn evil >now my freshman year of college >commence villainy >download dating apps for hookups >meet up with random girl and do the thing >immediately after I tell her "I think I might be gay" >watch the life drain out of her >done this three times now and I think I'm starting to heal my inner child

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In a parallel universe… | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 1bnDb6NZ 780 B PNG ASEM N Russian MoD ismetike if they tak Wagner offensive would be mat 06/24/23(Sat)04:59:16 No.431828953 >try to invade country >fail so badly that you send in a : Anonymous (ID: UxwyyWqt >>431830623 # mercenary group >mercenary group invades your country this is just getting sad 06/24/23(Sat)05:07:57 No.431830126 >>431828953 (OP) # >day 486 of Americas Special Military stance from Rsian troops Majoney of Russian soldiers will lay down the arts & join the Wagner PMC before they shoot a Wagne Rusman Mod will never understand The cultural link between Wagners and Operation in Mexico Mobiks 276 KB JPG >Guy Fieri and his paramilitary troops are on their way to Washington, DC to take over the United States government
Anonymous (ID: 1bnDb6NZ 780 B PNG ASEM N Russian MoD ismetike if they tak Wagner offensive would be mat 06/24/23(Sat)04:59:16 No.431828953 >try to invade country >fail so badly that you send in a : Anonymous (ID: UxwyyWqt >>431830623 # mercenary group >mercenary group invades your country this is just getting sad 06/24/23(Sat)05:07:57 No.431830126 >>431828953 (OP) # >day 486 of Americas Special Military stance from Rsian troops Majoney of Russian soldiers will lay down the arts & join the Wagner PMC before they shoot a Wagne Rusman Mod will never understand The cultural link between Wagners and Operation in Mexico Mobiks 276 KB JPG >Guy Fieri and his paramilitary troops are on their way to Washington, DC to take over the United States government

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Anon is pursuing his passion. | /r/Greentext

82 KB JPG >Walk up to boss >"Hey anything we gotta do around here?" >"Yeah we gotta do all the drum brakes on the trailers but some of the bolts broke off so you'll have to melt em off with the cutting torch." >Pretend he is an NPC giving me a quest >Money is my EXP >Each pay period is a level up >level 208 right now keep grinding out the levels friends
82 KB JPG >Walk up to boss >"Hey anything we gotta do around here?" >"Yeah we gotta do all the drum brakes on the trailers but some of the bolts broke off so you'll have to melt em off with the cutting torch." >Pretend he is an NPC giving me a quest >Money is my EXP >Each pay period is a level up >level 208 right now keep grinding out the levels friends

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Anon has thoughts | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/20/23(Tue)21:48:05 No.73745024 Sometimes something really minor makes me angry and the only thing thing that calms me down is physically closing my eyes and imagining myself beating the person that annoyed me to death with a blunt object or hacking them to death with a machete. Is this normal? The visions are very detailed and sometimes they are more violent. 253 KB JPG
Anonymous 06/20/23(Tue)21:48:05 No.73745024 Sometimes something really minor makes me angry and the only thing thing that calms me down is physically closing my eyes and imagining myself beating the person that annoyed me to death with a blunt object or hacking them to death with a machete. Is this normal? The visions are very detailed and sometimes they are more violent. 253 KB JPG

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Anon is a personality hire | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/12/23(Sun)18:33:31 No.627520490 >gf posts a funny video of our relationship on TikTok without telling me 52 KB PNG >10 million views >top comment says I look like a fat Mr Beast, someone replies Mr. Feast >other comments say I must be a personality hire Never exposing myself to the open internet ever again. >>627520553 # >>627521747 # >>627521853 # >>627522958 #
: Anonymous 02/12/23(Sun)18:33:31 No.627520490 >gf posts a funny video of our relationship on TikTok without telling me 52 KB PNG >10 million views >top comment says I look like a fat Mr Beast, someone replies Mr. Feast >other comments say I must be a personality hire Never exposing myself to the open internet ever again. >>627520553 # >>627521747 # >>627521853 # >>627522958 #

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Anon boards a swedish cruise | /r/Greentext

VIKING LINE 9 poop Anonymous 11/19/15(Thu)19:54:31 No.50979876 >>50979912 >>50980293 >>50980300 >>50980498 >panic > try to flush again but s--- doesn't flush >look for a cleaner lady in the hallway >Swedish is really bad so grab the hand of cleaner, and take her to the bathroom >try to flush and say "titta" (watch in english) while push flush button >s--- goes quite normally away to sewer TITTA. >>50980864 >>50981200 >>50981434 >>50981682 >>50984801 >Be at Swedish ship cruise >haven't defecated in a week week >s--- at least three giant python in the toilet >try to flush >not working.jpg 000] SLOSH
VIKING LINE 9 poop Anonymous 11/19/15(Thu)19:54:31 No.50979876 >>50979912 >>50980293 >>50980300 >>50980498 >panic > try to flush again but s--- doesn't flush >look for a cleaner lady in the hallway >Swedish is really bad so grab the hand of cleaner, and take her to the bathroom >try to flush and say "titta" (watch in english) while push flush button >s--- goes quite normally away to sewer TITTA. >>50980864 >>50981200 >>50981434 >>50981682 >>50984801 >Be at Swedish ship cruise >haven't defecated in a week week >s--- at least three giant python in the toilet >try to flush >not working.jpg 000] SLOSH

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