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anon asks a girl out | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)15:02:16 No.12098971 >like a girl >finally have the courage to ask her out >what's the worst she can say? >her reaction: >ew >gross >disgusting >you are f----- in the head >we are cousins ffs yea, "No." really is the worst response a man can get
Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)15:02:16 No.12098971 >like a girl >finally have the courage to ask her out >what's the worst she can say? >her reaction: >ew >gross >disgusting >you are f----- in the head >we are cousins ffs yea, "No." really is the worst response a man can get

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Anon wonders what changed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: IEGd9Cgf) How did Jews lose so much supp(...) 10/31/23(Tue)06:45:52 No.446943509 >Israel was attacked by Hamas >people are tired of muslim immigrants in the West >Jews in the West run an atrocity campaign, showing pics of beheaded babies, kidnapped/killed women, etc >somehow the biggest reversal of pro- Israeli sentiment happens Why? 20 years ago everyone would be on the side of Israel. 229 KB GIF
: Anonymous (ID: IEGd9Cgf) How did Jews lose so much supp(...) 10/31/23(Tue)06:45:52 No.446943509 >Israel was attacked by Hamas >people are tired of muslim immigrants in the West >Jews in the West run an atrocity campaign, showing pics of beheaded babies, kidnapped/killed women, etc >somehow the biggest reversal of pro- Israeli sentiment happens Why? 20 years ago everyone would be on the side of Israel. 229 KB GIF

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Daddy Issues | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous just needed to rant It's not all good man 10/31/23(Tue)01:27:05 No.75249736 48 KB JPG >me >tried to kill myself a couple years back, jumped off the roof of my house >somehow survive (car absorbed the impact and my head didnt hit make a full impact with concrete from 4 stories up) >dont remember how but woke up in the ER >was a minor so parents get informed, i told mom the truth but told my dad i slipped and fell while cleaning the ledges >like 35 stitches and broken legs, couldn't walk for months and had to go to physical therapy so i could walk again >when i got better we had a get together with all the extended family >they tell me that next time maybe i'd be better off using a gun >dad said i'm so useless i couldn't even kill myself >despite that told myself i wouldn't do it again no matter how bad it got >life has genuinely been a lot better recently, i have a lot more friends and work is going good >yet the thoughts are back somehow >talk to my dad because i still want us to get along regardless of everything >he just laughs at tells me to man up he's probably right and i'm probably just being emotional, but it genuinely hurts.
: Anonymous just needed to rant It's not all good man 10/31/23(Tue)01:27:05 No.75249736 48 KB JPG >me >tried to kill myself a couple years back, jumped off the roof of my house >somehow survive (car absorbed the impact and my head didnt hit make a full impact with concrete from 4 stories up) >dont remember how but woke up in the ER >was a minor so parents get informed, i told mom the truth but told my dad i slipped and fell while cleaning the ledges >like 35 stitches and broken legs, couldn't walk for months and had to go to physical therapy so i could walk again >when i got better we had a get together with all the extended family >they tell me that next time maybe i'd be better off using a gun >dad said i'm so useless i couldn't even kill myself >despite that told myself i wouldn't do it again no matter how bad it got >life has genuinely been a lot better recently, i have a lot more friends and work is going good >yet the thoughts are back somehow >talk to my dad because i still want us to get along regardless of everything >he just laughs at tells me to man up he's probably right and i'm probably just being emotional, but it genuinely hurts.

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Anon larps for love and fails | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/12/23(Thu)07:01:15 No.90560090 >that time I "accidentally" spilled soda on the the new Jodah goodstuff pile someone in my pod was sleeving up It was in my house and I maxed him the f--- out when he tried getting me to give him money for them. Kek. F--- 5c f------. He was literally almost crying about his ruined cardboard >>90560104 # >>90560127 # >>90560958 # >>90562408 # Anonymous 10/12/23(Thu)07:03:23 No.90560104 >>90560090 # >lying on the internet for fleeting attention truly sad >>90560129 # Anonymous 10/12/23(Thu)07:06:14 No.90560127 >>90560090 # Imagine being such an utter failure that the only thing you can think to do to give your life meaning is go on the Traditional Games board on 4channel.org and lie about destroying someone's trading cards because you think it makes you look like a big chad >>90560148 #
Anonymous 10/12/23(Thu)07:01:15 No.90560090 >that time I "accidentally" spilled soda on the the new Jodah goodstuff pile someone in my pod was sleeving up It was in my house and I maxed him the f--- out when he tried getting me to give him money for them. Kek. F--- 5c f------. He was literally almost crying about his ruined cardboard >>90560104 # >>90560127 # >>90560958 # >>90562408 # Anonymous 10/12/23(Thu)07:03:23 No.90560104 >>90560090 # >lying on the internet for fleeting attention truly sad >>90560129 # Anonymous 10/12/23(Thu)07:06:14 No.90560127 >>90560090 # Imagine being such an utter failure that the only thing you can think to do to give your life meaning is go on the Traditional Games board on 4channel.org and lie about destroying someone's trading cards because you think it makes you look like a big chad >>90560148 #

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I haven't actually watched House but apparently this is every episode | /r/Greentext

NEZ 13 JAU Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)15:49:29 No. 162514771 ✓ >>162514784>>162514825 >>162514830 >>162514844 >>162514847 >>162514848 >>162514950 >>162515022 >>162515032 >>162515116 >>162515263 >>162515791 Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)15:51:05 No.162514830 ✓ 1640940823147.jpg (41 KB, 650x455) google yandex iqdb wait 100 104 RO >>162515884>>162517803 Patient is suffering with myocarditis with no history of cardiac inflammation. Go 52 Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)15:49:53 No.162514784 ✓ Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)17:16:24 No.162517447 ✓ >>162517695 >>162517823 file.png (674 KB, 616x668) google yandex iqdb wait >>162514771 (OP) >This is perfectly normal for a boy his age, the science proves it. >Patient is triple jabbed, wore a double mask and latex gloves everywhere, still caught the latest variant. Go
NEZ 13 JAU Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)15:49:29 No. 162514771 ✓ >>162514784>>162514825 >>162514830 >>162514844 >>162514847 >>162514848 >>162514950 >>162515022 >>162515032 >>162515116 >>162515263 >>162515791 Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)15:51:05 No.162514830 ✓ 1640940823147.jpg (41 KB, 650x455) google yandex iqdb wait 100 104 RO >>162515884>>162517803 Patient is suffering with myocarditis with no history of cardiac inflammation. Go 52 Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)15:49:53 No.162514784 ✓ Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)17:16:24 No.162517447 ✓ >>162517695 >>162517823 file.png (674 KB, 616x668) google yandex iqdb wait >>162514771 (OP) >This is perfectly normal for a boy his age, the science proves it. >Patient is triple jabbed, wore a double mask and latex gloves everywhere, still caught the latest variant. Go

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Anon doubts his friends | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Someone just f------ kill me a(...) 15 KB JPG 10/31/23(Tue)13:50:56 No.908551255 >Be me >A------ parents >A------ siblings >Only nice one is my oldest brother >Haven't heard from him in 10 years >Never been able to keep a friend for more than a year >Gave up trying when I turned 15 >Have "friends" on Discord >They say I can talk to them whenever about whatever >Hesitate for about half an hour whenever I do because I don't want to annoy them >Get thoughts that they're only talking to me out of pity >Consider blocking everyone and going dark multiple times so they finally won't have to see me anymore Why am I like this
: Anonymous Someone just f------ kill me a(...) 15 KB JPG 10/31/23(Tue)13:50:56 No.908551255 >Be me >A------ parents >A------ siblings >Only nice one is my oldest brother >Haven't heard from him in 10 years >Never been able to keep a friend for more than a year >Gave up trying when I turned 15 >Have "friends" on Discord >They say I can talk to them whenever about whatever >Hesitate for about half an hour whenever I do because I don't want to annoy them >Get thoughts that they're only talking to me out of pity >Consider blocking everyone and going dark multiple times so they finally won't have to see me anymore Why am I like this

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The machines will make slaves of us all | /r/Greentext

ONLY THE DEAD CAN KNOW PEACE FROM THIS EVIL 14m (10/30 21:59) 452294447 PNG 137KB (350 × 350) 1400751274413.png 4 Replies ● >get home from work >go to NovelAl >spend 6 hours writing a literal actual novella culminating in a single sex scene >c-- >delete the entire story >go to bed >repeat the next day This s--- is destroying my f------ life
ONLY THE DEAD CAN KNOW PEACE FROM THIS EVIL 14m (10/30 21:59) 452294447 PNG 137KB (350 × 350) 1400751274413.png 4 Replies ● >get home from work >go to NovelAl >spend 6 hours writing a literal actual novella culminating in a single sex scene >c-- >delete the entire story >go to bed >repeat the next day This s--- is destroying my f------ life

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Yeah, problem? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/31/23(Tue)07:26:39 No.655885906 "Gears of war characters are so unrealistic its comedic nobody looks like that" Gears of war character designer: 27896987235987235.png 384 KB PNG >self-inserts are OK when men do them
: Anonymous 10/31/23(Tue)07:26:39 No.655885906 "Gears of war characters are so unrealistic its comedic nobody looks like that" Gears of war character designer: 27896987235987235.png 384 KB PNG >self-inserts are OK when men do them

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Anons favorite director is Airy Assturd | /r/Greentext

File: 1687104588020.png (3 KB, 454x520) Affor Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)01:35:58 No.191464652 >>191464676 >>191464820 >>191465108 >>191466318 >One ticket for me, one for my wife and one for her son for the latest slow burn, bone chilling, atmosphere- oozing, trope- subverting, genre-redefining, gut-wrenching, spine-tingling, emotionally taxing, paranoia-inducing, jaw- clenching, nerve-wracking, character- development driven, soul-shaking, nail-biting, anxiety-written, kafkaesque, post-lynchian, question-asking, socially-aware, ethnically- diverse, politically-cognisant, culturally relevant, socially-prescient, thought-provoking, artisanally- crafted and cheap jumpscares free A24 horror film, please! Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)01:37:15 No.191464676 >>191464652 (OP) # I look like this, say this and do this.
File: 1687104588020.png (3 KB, 454x520) Affor Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)01:35:58 No.191464652 >>191464676 >>191464820 >>191465108 >>191466318 >One ticket for me, one for my wife and one for her son for the latest slow burn, bone chilling, atmosphere- oozing, trope- subverting, genre-redefining, gut-wrenching, spine-tingling, emotionally taxing, paranoia-inducing, jaw- clenching, nerve-wracking, character- development driven, soul-shaking, nail-biting, anxiety-written, kafkaesque, post-lynchian, question-asking, socially-aware, ethnically- diverse, politically-cognisant, culturally relevant, socially-prescient, thought-provoking, artisanally- crafted and cheap jumpscares free A24 horror film, please! Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)01:37:15 No.191464676 >>191464652 (OP) # I look like this, say this and do this.

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Anon on hockey. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 29 KB JPG No.75246862 10/31/23(Tue)08:20:53 >the only black guy in the world who plays hockey >murders another player during a game
: Anonymous 29 KB JPG No.75246862 10/31/23(Tue)08:20:53 >the only black guy in the world who plays hockey >murders another player during a game

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Oldie but a goldie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/14/22(Tue)00:58:09 No.880104850 Hello anons before I begin let me clarify that I'm not gay. 910 KB JPG >Be me >This night >18 >At hanging out with my best friend with my parents gone for a few days >We've been best friends for a year now >Been drinking a bit and playing lots of video games and ordered a pizza >We were having a blast >At a certain point in the night like around 9:00 he makes a really funny joke that I don't remember but I know that it made us both laugh really hard >With out thinking I brush my right hand through his semi-curly black hair and call him a funny boy >He blushes >I realize I'm feeling flustered >We're kinda close >All of the sudden he kisses me and for some reason I kiss him back >We make love >Cuddle together and fall asleep >Wake up in the middle of the night with his head snuggled up on my chest and neck area >It feels nice but I'm not a homosexual I'm typing this as he's asleep in my arms. How do I let my best friend down nicely? I don't want to be a f----- /b/
: Anonymous 06/14/22(Tue)00:58:09 No.880104850 Hello anons before I begin let me clarify that I'm not gay. 910 KB JPG >Be me >This night >18 >At hanging out with my best friend with my parents gone for a few days >We've been best friends for a year now >Been drinking a bit and playing lots of video games and ordered a pizza >We were having a blast >At a certain point in the night like around 9:00 he makes a really funny joke that I don't remember but I know that it made us both laugh really hard >With out thinking I brush my right hand through his semi-curly black hair and call him a funny boy >He blushes >I realize I'm feeling flustered >We're kinda close >All of the sudden he kisses me and for some reason I kiss him back >We make love >Cuddle together and fall asleep >Wake up in the middle of the night with his head snuggled up on my chest and neck area >It feels nice but I'm not a homosexual I'm typing this as he's asleep in my arms. How do I let my best friend down nicely? I don't want to be a f----- /b/

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Anon is not /fit/ | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/19/23(Thu)18:32:34 No.90654920 >spend a few years getting in shape >mew for a few years too >look like a golden god >attend draft >tell the fat f--- next to you "hey buddy you pass me that mythic bomb and I won't steal your gf" >he meekly obliges How has no one thought of this >>90654945 # Anonymous 10/19/23(Thu)18:34:57 No.90654945 >>90654920 # >tell the fat f--- next to you "hey buddy you pass me that mythic bomb and I won't steal your gf" >"Huh? what gf?"
Anonymous 10/19/23(Thu)18:32:34 No.90654920 >spend a few years getting in shape >mew for a few years too >look like a golden god >attend draft >tell the fat f--- next to you "hey buddy you pass me that mythic bomb and I won't steal your gf" >he meekly obliges How has no one thought of this >>90654945 # Anonymous 10/19/23(Thu)18:34:57 No.90654945 >>90654920 # >tell the fat f--- next to you "hey buddy you pass me that mythic bomb and I won't steal your gf" >"Huh? what gf?"

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Anon's tale as a truck driver | /r/Greentext

518 KB PNG >be me >Truck driver >Pull into gas station to shower near Las Vegas >Showers full >Go to bathroom >Huge line for stalls but urinal open >Take huge piss >Asian tourist comes in >Assuming he doesn't speak English well because he's trying to signal to us that he needs to s--- >Stalls are all taken so he runs to the urinal, drops his pants and projectile s---- into a urinal >It was entirely liquid so not really a huge issue there >He runs over to the paper towels >Shoves one in his ass and gives us a thumbs up >He runs out >All 6-8 of us just left in the bathroom look at each other in complete silence
518 KB PNG >be me >Truck driver >Pull into gas station to shower near Las Vegas >Showers full >Go to bathroom >Huge line for stalls but urinal open >Take huge piss >Asian tourist comes in >Assuming he doesn't speak English well because he's trying to signal to us that he needs to s--- >Stalls are all taken so he runs to the urinal, drops his pants and projectile s---- into a urinal >It was entirely liquid so not really a huge issue there >He runs over to the paper towels >Shoves one in his ass and gives us a thumbs up >He runs out >All 6-8 of us just left in the bathroom look at each other in complete silence

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Anon's conundrum | /r/Greentext

1698593497908467.png PNG 208.9 KiB 860x811 >never really had much of a desire for a girlfriend >whenever i have it, it goes once i j------- >j------- twice today >desire still there it's over right? do i have to get a girlfriend or can i dominate my desires?
1698593497908467.png PNG 208.9 KiB 860x811 >never really had much of a desire for a girlfriend >whenever i have it, it goes once i j------- >j------- twice today >desire still there it's over right? do i have to get a girlfriend or can i dominate my desires?

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The amazing digital goon session. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/30/23(Mon)12:02:30 No.908520811 >Try to j------- to p--- of Pomni. >90% of the good p--- is of her f------ that purple rabbit guy. LIVEPOMNIREACTION >F------ hate that character. >Goes to j------- to something else. 379 KB PNG
: Anonymous 10/30/23(Mon)12:02:30 No.908520811 >Try to j------- to p--- of Pomni. >90% of the good p--- is of her f------ that purple rabbit guy. LIVEPOMNIREACTION >F------ hate that character. >Goes to j------- to something else. 379 KB PNG

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Anon likes bbc | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/30/23(Mon)23:30:11 No.908519269 >be me >white >have gf but addicted to bbc p--- >freshly 18 >post ass on Craigslist 295 KB PNG >instantly get hit up by a massive bbc >I am a bitch in heat >he says he can't host. Parents aren't home till dark so whatever >he comes over, it's even bigger than the pictures >literally the most veiny, bulging, beautiful black pornstar c--- in my face IRL >I'm about to c-- my pants as a wrap my hands around it >he mercilessly shoves it down my throat and f---- it hard for 15 minutes >mucus running down my chest >we both have a mutual understanding he can do whatever he wants and I would never argue >he's literally plunging the back of my throat, I'm seeing stars >he lays back on the couch (we are in living room) and tells me to go to down >I do. Give best performance of my life >bobbing on a n----- d--- in my happy place >mom walks in, drops bags of groceries on floor screaming >brother walks in behind her. Turns out his baseball game rained out >both looking at me butt naked covered in my own mucus hunched over a rock hard 10 inch bbc on the couch >she walks out, drives off >dad comes home a few hours later >tell him I was blackmailed and didn't want it >"you had a black male alright" he says >mfw
: Anonymous 10/30/23(Mon)23:30:11 No.908519269 >be me >white >have gf but addicted to bbc p--- >freshly 18 >post ass on Craigslist 295 KB PNG >instantly get hit up by a massive bbc >I am a bitch in heat >he says he can't host. Parents aren't home till dark so whatever >he comes over, it's even bigger than the pictures >literally the most veiny, bulging, beautiful black pornstar c--- in my face IRL >I'm about to c-- my pants as a wrap my hands around it >he mercilessly shoves it down my throat and f---- it hard for 15 minutes >mucus running down my chest >we both have a mutual understanding he can do whatever he wants and I would never argue >he's literally plunging the back of my throat, I'm seeing stars >he lays back on the couch (we are in living room) and tells me to go to down >I do. Give best performance of my life >bobbing on a n----- d--- in my happy place >mom walks in, drops bags of groceries on floor screaming >brother walks in behind her. Turns out his baseball game rained out >both looking at me butt naked covered in my own mucus hunched over a rock hard 10 inch bbc on the couch >she walks out, drives off >dad comes home a few hours later >tell him I was blackmailed and didn't want it >"you had a black male alright" he says >mfw

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A solution for all problems | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 115 KB PNG 10/30/23 (Mon)03:14:01 No.908503927 You have a machine in front of you that can render all people of a certain group infertile. Who are you picking and why? 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread 10/30/23(Mon)03:17:07 No.908504028 : Anonymous >>908503927 (OP) # I will choose women. Humanity has lived long enough.
Anonymous 115 KB PNG 10/30/23 (Mon)03:14:01 No.908503927 You have a machine in front of you that can render all people of a certain group infertile. Who are you picking and why? 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread 10/30/23(Mon)03:17:07 No.908504028 : Anonymous >>908503927 (OP) # I will choose women. Humanity has lived long enough.

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Anon volunteers at the zoo | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 73 KB GIF 07/20/19(Sat)21:07:22 No.3086720 >been volunteering at the zoo >chatting with keeper about animals >mentions that they let the chimps watch movies in winter when they keep them inside >turns out they love watching planet of the apes over and over >they also caught one of the chimps making a weapon should I be worried?
: Anonymous 73 KB GIF 07/20/19(Sat)21:07:22 No.3086720 >been volunteering at the zoo >chatting with keeper about animals >mentions that they let the chimps watch movies in winter when they keep them inside >turns out they love watching planet of the apes over and over >they also caught one of the chimps making a weapon should I be worried?

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Anon on the fnaf guy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous W 10/30/23(Mon)07:32:06 No.655775605 Hesbetterthenyou.jpg 17 KB JPG >get criticized once >creates a survival horror game that gains tons of traction >makes several sequels >licenses a ton of merch >teams up with an indie company to make a console game and a vr game >produces an entire movie that grossed over 130 million dollars on a 20 million dollar budget over a weekend >doesnt elaborate Wonder what the guy who criticized him is up to now...
: Anonymous W 10/30/23(Mon)07:32:06 No.655775605 Hesbetterthenyou.jpg 17 KB JPG >get criticized once >creates a survival horror game that gains tons of traction >makes several sequels >licenses a ton of merch >teams up with an indie company to make a console game and a vr game >produces an entire movie that grossed over 130 million dollars on a 20 million dollar budget over a weekend >doesnt elaborate Wonder what the guy who criticized him is up to now...

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Anon is a rice farmer. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 64 KB JPG >year 2020 >trump is re-elected >immediately declares war on Vietnam >Vietnam war 2.0 >thousands of GenZ kids are drafted into the military A few months later... >be rice farmer in Vietnam ●>start hearing Lil Yaughty playing in the distance to the sounds of rotary engines >helicopters start flying over me ●>Gucci gang starts blasting from the helicopter speakers >whole f----- area around me gets napalmed >choppers drop off enemy troops >get smoked by a 17 year old with a pickle Rick sticker on the side of his helmet >he does the Fortnite dance over my body then yeets me into a bush
Anonymous 64 KB JPG >year 2020 >trump is re-elected >immediately declares war on Vietnam >Vietnam war 2.0 >thousands of GenZ kids are drafted into the military A few months later... >be rice farmer in Vietnam ●>start hearing Lil Yaughty playing in the distance to the sounds of rotary engines >helicopters start flying over me ●>Gucci gang starts blasting from the helicopter speakers >whole f----- area around me gets napalmed >choppers drop off enemy troops >get smoked by a 17 year old with a pickle Rick sticker on the side of his helmet >he does the Fortnite dance over my body then yeets me into a bush

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