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Shrek
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ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY!? | /r/Greentext
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>niggers tongue my angus
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TF2 Greentext
![Anonymous 03/19/13(Tue)05:13 No.181622235 Replies: 1816226291816226542181622751181622824181622908181623013181623198181623268 2181623298181623334181623448 181623738 >181623869 >181624049 181624406 File: 1363684381702 ipg-(104 KB, 500x484, sad_frog_2547[1].jpg) >guy in TF2 talking on the mic with a thick arab accent >"You all go now. Go to fight the bad. I stay defend. They no get past. I stay, you go fight.I alone stay for to defend. Take their box. I stay." >someone tells him to shut the f--- up tell them to shut the f--- up and let him talk if he wants (because I think he's funny to listen to) >he adds me every f------ game I play with him he does the exact same s--- >"I am Tank. I wait by helicopter. You kill. I won't let through. You kill. Boomer man, go vomit. I alone guard helicopter. You go. - "You put portal there. Good. I wait. You discover answer. I know answer. Keep portal there. I will put portal when need. Keep putting portal. Good. Do you see? I wait. You put portal. Good just talking non-stop every f------ game we play arab spring happens have no idea where he lives one day he sends me a message >"bad times friend ahead >"maybe no computer" >"maybe no home >"i go away but we are two of soul" will return Last Online: 615 days ago Good luck, you wonderful bastard.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/000/528/879/f7c.png)
![Anonymous 03/19/13(Tue)05:13 No.181622235 Replies: 1816226291816226542181622751181622824181622908181623013181623198181623268 2181623298181623334181623448 181623738 >181623869 >181624049 181624406 File: 1363684381702 ipg-(104 KB, 500x484, sad_frog_2547[1].jpg) >guy in TF2 talking on the mic with a thick arab accent >"You all go now. Go to fight the bad. I stay defend. They no get past. I stay, you go fight.I alone stay for to defend. Take their box. I stay." >someone tells him to shut the f--- up tell them to shut the f--- up and let him talk if he wants (because I think he's funny to listen to) >he adds me every f------ game I play with him he does the exact same s--- >"I am Tank. I wait by helicopter. You kill. I won't let through. You kill. Boomer man, go vomit. I alone guard helicopter. You go. - "You put portal there. Good. I wait. You discover answer. I know answer. Keep portal there. I will put portal when need. Keep putting portal. Good. Do you see? I wait. You put portal. Good just talking non-stop every f------ game we play arab spring happens have no idea where he lives one day he sends me a message >"bad times friend ahead >"maybe no computer" >"maybe no home >"i go away but we are two of soul" will return Last Online: 615 days ago Good luck, you wonderful bastard.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/528/879/f7c.png)
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Saddest Greentext Story I've Ever Seen
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Plague Doctor
![+] Legend of the Plague Doctor Anonymous Dress up as plague doctor. >Walk down street to McDonalds. >Enter, walk to counter. >Hot blond girl turns around and screams. Put on deep voice. >"DO NOT BE AFRAID, CHILD! >Wave arms, leap onto counter. >Kickover register and charity jar. >Raise hands into air. "PURRRRIFFFFYYYYYYYYY >Manager storms in, appears angry >Moonwalk >Kick fat kid's McFlurry from hands. SrYou are fat. You need not this." >Tip hat to manager, jump from counter. >Head for door, see bitch/hot girl from high school. >She has fries, is staring with gaping jaw. >Sprint to her >Grab her fries, slap her. >Manager shouts, tries to grab hat. >Spin around, slap him across face "UNHAND ME, MALE OF BROWN SKIN!" >Sparta kick the door. > Run out of store. Walk the dinosaur >Go home, leave without costume >Return to McDonald's, see sign with "no dogs allowed" stuff. >See picture of plague doctor with cross-out thing on it LOL](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/000/329/294/1ab.jpg)
![+] Legend of the Plague Doctor Anonymous Dress up as plague doctor. >Walk down street to McDonalds. >Enter, walk to counter. >Hot blond girl turns around and screams. Put on deep voice. >"DO NOT BE AFRAID, CHILD! >Wave arms, leap onto counter. >Kickover register and charity jar. >Raise hands into air. "PURRRRIFFFFYYYYYYYYY >Manager storms in, appears angry >Moonwalk >Kick fat kid's McFlurry from hands. SrYou are fat. You need not this." >Tip hat to manager, jump from counter. >Head for door, see bitch/hot girl from high school. >She has fries, is staring with gaping jaw. >Sprint to her >Grab her fries, slap her. >Manager shouts, tries to grab hat. >Spin around, slap him across face "UNHAND ME, MALE OF BROWN SKIN!" >Sparta kick the door. > Run out of store. Walk the dinosaur >Go home, leave without costume >Return to McDonald's, see sign with "no dogs allowed" stuff. >See picture of plague doctor with cross-out thing on it LOL](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/329/294/1ab.jpg)
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The story of Fats and the retard three
![Anonymous (ID: 2042 Eb) 03/01/12(Thu) 15:38 №3843755.1 [ ! ] 2238437f0e)wennt2 >> 43e240 2384374240 very well. This is the first tme l met four men t changed my ife This the Fats Mogee, and his Retard Three. History in the cafeteria, due to the sa of the class Fats Mcgose and Retard Thrae walk in, push past ma, go to winding machne ryamare of just how large and ape Rke Fats Mcg ats Mcgee gets hes arm stuck in vanding machine, tryng to reach up to pul Chips out and Raing AMy entre dy55 has 5topped to =atch the chaos. One of the Retand Three starts blaning me, in his sputtering retard tone Fats Mcgee wets hinself, les there in a puddle of urne crying, am in the vending machine Freighters had to come and cut the vending machine to s--- to free him Thus begins a legend of unstoppable tard with mine one Snal time as they ad he away he Tales of Fats Mcgee and the Ratand Threa part ttng rclmroom, working on some school tuffくAt thn port, mn trying to get my Mautun) Fats Mogee and his retard three are running down the hal, bursiting into classrooms and waing to be Plepon gs, youre derupting my clsroom iLet's。汱 same tegh-pitched urgie nose, a nose I'd come to cal The Song ofthe Tarr Starts trying to take the ple of essay's T'm grading Tard Guard waks in Ths Tard Guard managed to lose har Tards 勹parsonale don't agree they can't help it, bacause I havu aapecial oicatun fanily m new "ho d Fata Mega" and his Ratard Three part 3: Navenga of th·S--- nd up,xpecting someane to have a lne,becan I teach in one of the s-------- schools in the Fats Mogee and his Retard Three have walked in and started screaming Retard Speech at ths grl, b OU HAVE FIRED BECAUSE OF I wak back to classroom, but not bafore seong that Fats had royally s--- hier. Bad anough that it doesnt even look y,1 start akngskin off Asoermoes(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 16: 17 No 384381482 [冂22384382092 22286382735 223843B3dai 2238438SOL Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three part Ⅳ: The F eld ahve [with the sound of Tard Rage》 2Fats must be』sophomore about the port. I have my Masters, and plan on "orang on my ome the Baseball coach, because the previous one was amested for ddding the pickle of students Lead students towards Field for fourth block, which is Practice/Strength and Conditioning carly-35k Tard Giyd if they can wrap沈up, snce the Tards only have the field for third block, Tard Guard, a hot one that I actualy le,starts rounding thee up, doing her job. fats Mcgee decides to continue what w引be 규 war until he graduates uning away fron T Tard Guard, begns pursut ats runs up the bladws. Hagets to the top, and hurts res biuljeans at thú Tard Guard. Thsi Tard Guard is pagged, and i now wappad in hit-covered u Guard guts close, becomng . :9438200 The Tale of Fats Mogee and hs Retand Three part : Fiald bay. HomNcoming Day: which meas we don't do s---, and are ara various activiies for the stink. He slo4 day old boled cabbage that has been eft out in the sun, and mannabed in piss female friend passes by, is ㎝arty pleased with my Trendness, towards Tards nie points, but hope in my he art that the look of terror on my face betrays the idea The Three 3re sti1stamg One i5 00ing, and it's 5tartng to pool on my book. oud noisetig the Racads to 'go tha luck anay Basabal player walk up,scarts I become best friends with a player of nrw. Ray. Hul be rriportant later. Notica that there's s--- t on the bleacher nxt to me, and the book t was studying ied Anonymoun(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 18:42 №55055112 [ ! ] 22384 asss2 22 48s赳22294220425 The Tale of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Part VI: An Exchange of Blows. This honer goes to Ray more than anything- If you're out there, man.This was f------ gonious. ter of Fat's Sophore year e have baen many menor avants betmoan part v and Part VI, but nothing that woldnt ba much more thn a ropeat Has bean deaing with Pats Mcgas sst for two and a half years now a big gane because ofa Diaco Themed Prom for t Tand Enpre y inds r grves Fat's fnand 6ftson dolrs bo, in th" modSu of prom, whip hi·dck aut and start ruting『ata with it. Ray convre"" me to go to ths prom where he'= bong a peer taev, taling m th t ita bo 'worth it' atting, being bored and mtated at Ray Buddeny, ane of the Retard Thr whis out his d--- and starts nubbing it againet Fats ch my god Ray you Suddenly. Fats Fats whips out goes into Rage Mode: Final Form his own, chode-lke Tard Penis and starts dueing his fiend, screaming in Tard Rage Fats suddenly grabs hie Tard Friend and hus hie into a big, plastic pillar they set up for pictures Fats has removed hs pants completsly, and in aving ha d--- around, paing on wveything. Retwd Speed, and start Ray puls him off, but gets in trouble laber for Attacking the kid because of ltimabe Mother Bitch Mode l think at that point Fats realized how bad he f----- up.Because he just started crying Thus, the beginning of the End had amived Fats Moges and his Racand Three part Va: End of the Bagining of tha End umner, but I'v school, ar thay'd ind a may to blame ma or the school 1 have to t can't get damaged know for a fact Fats in turring 10 soon, becauss hea eld back a year in midde school so I could get hm One day, after moving to a ness classroom, Fats begns to fade from my mind because Tm not so close to hm use I'm an outdoorsman at heart Suddenly. I hear a huge bang on the ndow, and nearly go fying out of my chair t looks ke he just ate a smal aninal Hs face covered, iterally,in Ketchup, hunks of food, and o At this point, Fats has grown a P--- Beard He has vogetables and s--- hanging from isma N stare, knowing mry faba only seperated by a layer of glass. around the window, and it's vistiy roasy ☆em where res skr, not the food, has touched ohe mouths Dessebuuuuuu through the windo bafore gutting cled anay by a Tard Guard, and taken back A fw days later, nodents resueH now knows where 1 am Tm teaching U.S. Hatory, when sudderly a Ch my f------ u, n. Nearly beat the hell out of the Tardlet and evenbually resort to screaming and fiing to maike them ee T need to put my plan into Anonymous (ID: 20g2GE) 03/01/12(Thu)17:07 3843茆153 [ ! ] 20)Messe >>38438957초 The Tale of Fats McGee and his Retard Three, Part VH:A Farewel to Arme part 1 rols around. Apei sst cones it tuns out, Fats is an avid fan of movies, and loves going to the cinona it's tmi. I prapar-reyself, before wakang temards the movii. I don't let hn see ma unta wu'r·in tha conc y mada frash Ths is going to hurt rally f------ bad, but it'l be worth it. Anonymous (ID: zbRED》 03/01/12(Thu)17: 11 №354359884 [ 2deo)0292 The Final Story of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Fats starts freaking the f--- out, shaking. widen as she recogrizes m Fats suddenly throws the steaning popcom at me, and unges on e getting waled on by a Retard The Final Stary of Fats ncredbly agreve and rage-fed No matter what happens, no matter hos old I get his Retard Three nd you ever plan on tarding it Just remenber who stands between you, and chaos, you sniveing ittle Down S--- And thus enda, the Tale of Fars Mogea.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/000/319/075/71c.png)
![Anonymous (ID: 2042 Eb) 03/01/12(Thu) 15:38 №3843755.1 [ ! ] 2238437f0e)wennt2 >> 43e240 2384374240 very well. This is the first tme l met four men t changed my ife This the Fats Mogee, and his Retard Three. History in the cafeteria, due to the sa of the class Fats Mcgose and Retard Thrae walk in, push past ma, go to winding machne ryamare of just how large and ape Rke Fats Mcg ats Mcgee gets hes arm stuck in vanding machine, tryng to reach up to pul Chips out and Raing AMy entre dy55 has 5topped to =atch the chaos. One of the Retand Three starts blaning me, in his sputtering retard tone Fats Mcgee wets hinself, les there in a puddle of urne crying, am in the vending machine Freighters had to come and cut the vending machine to s--- to free him Thus begins a legend of unstoppable tard with mine one Snal time as they ad he away he Tales of Fats Mcgee and the Ratand Threa part ttng rclmroom, working on some school tuffくAt thn port, mn trying to get my Mautun) Fats Mogee and his retard three are running down the hal, bursiting into classrooms and waing to be Plepon gs, youre derupting my clsroom iLet's。汱 same tegh-pitched urgie nose, a nose I'd come to cal The Song ofthe Tarr Starts trying to take the ple of essay's T'm grading Tard Guard waks in Ths Tard Guard managed to lose har Tards 勹parsonale don't agree they can't help it, bacause I havu aapecial oicatun fanily m new "ho d Fata Mega" and his Ratard Three part 3: Navenga of th·S--- nd up,xpecting someane to have a lne,becan I teach in one of the s-------- schools in the Fats Mogee and his Retard Three have walked in and started screaming Retard Speech at ths grl, b OU HAVE FIRED BECAUSE OF I wak back to classroom, but not bafore seong that Fats had royally s--- hier. Bad anough that it doesnt even look y,1 start akngskin off Asoermoes(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 16: 17 No 384381482 [冂22384382092 22286382735 223843B3dai 2238438SOL Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three part Ⅳ: The F eld ahve [with the sound of Tard Rage》 2Fats must be』sophomore about the port. I have my Masters, and plan on "orang on my ome the Baseball coach, because the previous one was amested for ddding the pickle of students Lead students towards Field for fourth block, which is Practice/Strength and Conditioning carly-35k Tard Giyd if they can wrap沈up, snce the Tards only have the field for third block, Tard Guard, a hot one that I actualy le,starts rounding thee up, doing her job. fats Mcgee decides to continue what w引be 규 war until he graduates uning away fron T Tard Guard, begns pursut ats runs up the bladws. Hagets to the top, and hurts res biuljeans at thú Tard Guard. Thsi Tard Guard is pagged, and i now wappad in hit-covered u Guard guts close, becomng . :9438200 The Tale of Fats Mogee and hs Retand Three part : Fiald bay. HomNcoming Day: which meas we don't do s---, and are ara various activiies for the stink. He slo4 day old boled cabbage that has been eft out in the sun, and mannabed in piss female friend passes by, is ㎝arty pleased with my Trendness, towards Tards nie points, but hope in my he art that the look of terror on my face betrays the idea The Three 3re sti1stamg One i5 00ing, and it's 5tartng to pool on my book. oud noisetig the Racads to 'go tha luck anay Basabal player walk up,scarts I become best friends with a player of nrw. Ray. Hul be rriportant later. Notica that there's s--- t on the bleacher nxt to me, and the book t was studying ied Anonymoun(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 18:42 №55055112 [ ! ] 22384 asss2 22 48s赳22294220425 The Tale of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Part VI: An Exchange of Blows. This honer goes to Ray more than anything- If you're out there, man.This was f------ gonious. ter of Fat's Sophore year e have baen many menor avants betmoan part v and Part VI, but nothing that woldnt ba much more thn a ropeat Has bean deaing with Pats Mcgas sst for two and a half years now a big gane because ofa Diaco Themed Prom for t Tand Enpre y inds r grves Fat's fnand 6ftson dolrs bo, in th" modSu of prom, whip hi·dck aut and start ruting『ata with it. Ray convre"" me to go to ths prom where he'= bong a peer taev, taling m th t ita bo 'worth it' atting, being bored and mtated at Ray Buddeny, ane of the Retard Thr whis out his d--- and starts nubbing it againet Fats ch my god Ray you Suddenly. Fats Fats whips out goes into Rage Mode: Final Form his own, chode-lke Tard Penis and starts dueing his fiend, screaming in Tard Rage Fats suddenly grabs hie Tard Friend and hus hie into a big, plastic pillar they set up for pictures Fats has removed hs pants completsly, and in aving ha d--- around, paing on wveything. Retwd Speed, and start Ray puls him off, but gets in trouble laber for Attacking the kid because of ltimabe Mother Bitch Mode l think at that point Fats realized how bad he f----- up.Because he just started crying Thus, the beginning of the End had amived Fats Moges and his Racand Three part Va: End of the Bagining of tha End umner, but I'v school, ar thay'd ind a may to blame ma or the school 1 have to t can't get damaged know for a fact Fats in turring 10 soon, becauss hea eld back a year in midde school so I could get hm One day, after moving to a ness classroom, Fats begns to fade from my mind because Tm not so close to hm use I'm an outdoorsman at heart Suddenly. I hear a huge bang on the ndow, and nearly go fying out of my chair t looks ke he just ate a smal aninal Hs face covered, iterally,in Ketchup, hunks of food, and o At this point, Fats has grown a P--- Beard He has vogetables and s--- hanging from isma N stare, knowing mry faba only seperated by a layer of glass. around the window, and it's vistiy roasy ☆em where res skr, not the food, has touched ohe mouths Dessebuuuuuu through the windo bafore gutting cled anay by a Tard Guard, and taken back A fw days later, nodents resueH now knows where 1 am Tm teaching U.S. Hatory, when sudderly a Ch my f------ u, n. Nearly beat the hell out of the Tardlet and evenbually resort to screaming and fiing to maike them ee T need to put my plan into Anonymous (ID: 20g2GE) 03/01/12(Thu)17:07 3843茆153 [ ! ] 20)Messe >>38438957초 The Tale of Fats McGee and his Retard Three, Part VH:A Farewel to Arme part 1 rols around. Apei sst cones it tuns out, Fats is an avid fan of movies, and loves going to the cinona it's tmi. I prapar-reyself, before wakang temards the movii. I don't let hn see ma unta wu'r·in tha conc y mada frash Ths is going to hurt rally f------ bad, but it'l be worth it. Anonymous (ID: zbRED》 03/01/12(Thu)17: 11 №354359884 [ 2deo)0292 The Final Story of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Fats starts freaking the f--- out, shaking. widen as she recogrizes m Fats suddenly throws the steaning popcom at me, and unges on e getting waled on by a Retard The Final Stary of Fats ncredbly agreve and rage-fed No matter what happens, no matter hos old I get his Retard Three nd you ever plan on tarding it Just remenber who stands between you, and chaos, you sniveing ittle Down S--- And thus enda, the Tale of Fars Mogea.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/319/075/71c.png)
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