Lizard People of New York - Images

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Bernie the Nice Lizard

Lizard People of New York June 7- "Bernie Sanders has inspired me politically and sexually. I used to be afraid to hit on girls but now I just say: 'I realize that every metric indicates that I have lost out to the guy you are now dating. That being said, this whole system is rigged against nice guys like me. This isn't over until your wedding date and I plan to convince all your friends and family to pick me once you get to the altar.' Then I just wear them down or hope their current boyfriend gets arrested. 'Like Comment Share
Lizard People of New York June 7- "Bernie Sanders has inspired me politically and sexually. I used to be afraid to hit on girls but now I just say: 'I realize that every metric indicates that I have lost out to the guy you are now dating. That being said, this whole system is rigged against nice guys like me. This isn't over until your wedding date and I plan to convince all your friends and family to pick me once you get to the altar.' Then I just wear them down or hope their current boyfriend gets arrested. 'Like Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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Lizard Trump Hugs Flag

Lizard People of New York June 12. Donald: "I love you so much. Flag: "l do not consent." ★ 大 LikeCommentShare
Lizard People of New York June 12. Donald: "I love you so much. Flag: "l do not consent." ★ 大 LikeCommentShare

Lizard People of New York
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Lizard People Cigarettes

Lizard People of New York June 14 "My dad left to get cigarettes when I was 8 and he never came back. So l guess, at least, that's the ONE thing I know not to get him if he comes home for Father's Day." 'Like Comment Share
Lizard People of New York June 14 "My dad left to get cigarettes when I was 8 and he never came back. So l guess, at least, that's the ONE thing I know not to get him if he comes home for Father's Day." 'Like Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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Lizard People McRib

Lizard People of New York June 17. "A lot of people think thoughts and prayers are worthless. But, as Lizard People, we actually have a mind-reading database that records all of them. Thoughts and prayers may not have caused anyone from being murdered but they DID bring back the McRib. Which is fitting, because the McRib is made out of murdered humans." Like Comment Share
Lizard People of New York June 17. "A lot of people think thoughts and prayers are worthless. But, as Lizard People, we actually have a mind-reading database that records all of them. Thoughts and prayers may not have caused anyone from being murdered but they DID bring back the McRib. Which is fitting, because the McRib is made out of murdered humans." Like Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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lizard people rigged life

Lizard People of New York June 20 e "Sports aren't rigged. Politics aren't rigged. Lotteries aren't rigged. Why would we rig those things? What about be the point in that? You know what is actually rigged? Genetics. You're all predetermined to be idiots long before you're even born. 1 Like Comment Share Comment
Lizard People of New York June 20 e "Sports aren't rigged. Politics aren't rigged. Lotteries aren't rigged. Why would we rig those things? What about be the point in that? You know what is actually rigged? Genetics. You're all predetermined to be idiots long before you're even born. 1 Like Comment Share Comment

Lizard People of New York
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Lizard Goes Back In Time

Lizard People of New York 9 hrs "It's weird we all assume that if you could travel back in time, you'd just HAAAAVE to kill someone. I time travel often. It's part of my daily commute. I work as a government agent in 1942 but I live here in 2016. Everyone's always like 'blah blah blah why don't you kill Hitler?' I dunno maybe because it's like super out of the way for me?! I'm traveling to the PAST not to GERMANY. That's like a four hour flight! 1 / Like Comment Share
Lizard People of New York 9 hrs "It's weird we all assume that if you could travel back in time, you'd just HAAAAVE to kill someone. I time travel often. It's part of my daily commute. I work as a government agent in 1942 but I live here in 2016. Everyone's always like 'blah blah blah why don't you kill Hitler?' I dunno maybe because it's like super out of the way for me?! I'm traveling to the PAST not to GERMANY. That's like a four hour flight! 1 / Like Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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Lizard People

Lizard People of New York June 21 e Sonmes 1 el kel wab rong decade: Maybe tsbecause I was trapped in my mother's uterus for 400 years. "Maybe. 1 Like Comment Share
Lizard People of New York June 21 e Sonmes 1 el kel wab rong decade: Maybe tsbecause I was trapped in my mother's uterus for 400 years. "Maybe. 1 Like Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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Shapeshift Into Peter Dinklage

Lizard People of New York June 23 e "Sometimes I shape-shift into a taller version of Peter Dinklage just to f--- with people. Like -Comment Share
Lizard People of New York June 23 e "Sometimes I shape-shift into a taller version of Peter Dinklage just to f--- with people. Like -Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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Obama As Lizard Person

Lizard People of New York June 27 "My opponents are idiots. Why would I be a secret Kenyan or a secret Muslim when I can openly be a Lizard Person? Do you u much cooler that is? No human religion or nationality can top that. Yesterday I shape-shifted into Jay Z and had sex with Beyonce. And then she shape shifted back into Paul Ryan and we both went back to work. Do you understand how f------ cool that is? I don't need to secretly pray to a God; I am a God. d how 'Like -Comment Share
Lizard People of New York June 27 "My opponents are idiots. Why would I be a secret Kenyan or a secret Muslim when I can openly be a Lizard Person? Do you u much cooler that is? No human religion or nationality can top that. Yesterday I shape-shifted into Jay Z and had sex with Beyonce. And then she shape shifted back into Paul Ryan and we both went back to work. Do you understand how f------ cool that is? I don't need to secretly pray to a God; I am a God. d how 'Like -Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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Lizards Fuckin Plants

Lizard People of New York July 9 at 8:47pm "We're gonna go home and f--- this plant." 'Like -Comment Share
Lizard People of New York July 9 at 8:47pm "We're gonna go home and f--- this plant." 'Like -Comment Share

Lizard People of New York
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Jeb the Lizard

Lizard People of New York July 18 at 5:08pm "I lost my job. There's nothing more embarrassing than being a homeless Lizard Person." "What was your job before you were fired?" "I was presidential candidate Jeb Bush." 'Like Comment Share Top Comments
Lizard People of New York July 18 at 5:08pm "I lost my job. There's nothing more embarrassing than being a homeless Lizard Person." "What was your job before you were fired?" "I was presidential candidate Jeb Bush." 'Like Comment Share Top Comments

Lizard People of New York
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Hillary's Lizard Reflection

Lizard People of New York July 25 at 5:15pm of speeches. #DNC 1 Like -Comment ·Share Comment 7.3K Top Comments
Lizard People of New York July 25 at 5:15pm of speeches. #DNC 1 Like -Comment ·Share Comment 7.3K Top Comments

Lizard People of New York
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