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Anon does something nice | /r/Greentext

Small acts of kindness are something we can all do to make our lives less s---. There is no excuse not to do stuff like this. >Вe me 96 KB JPG >Uni student depressed >Walking to nearby liquor store to numb the pain >Tourist trap store on the way >Sells tacky souvenirs and whatnot >Go in on a whim >Postcard is like f------ 25 cents >Buy one >Wake up next morning with hangover >See postcard >Look up online how to fill it out because who the f--- knows how to fill out a postcard in current year >Fill it out >Send to mom and dad >Just like two banal sentences about how I'm doing ok (a lie) and how I hope they are taking good care of my cat >Like 5 days later >Mom calls me to say how much getting that postcard meant to them >Says it made their entire week >Don't drink myself to sleep that night for the first time in a long time
Small acts of kindness are something we can all do to make our lives less s---. There is no excuse not to do stuff like this. >Вe me 96 KB JPG >Uni student depressed >Walking to nearby liquor store to numb the pain >Tourist trap store on the way >Sells tacky souvenirs and whatnot >Go in on a whim >Postcard is like f------ 25 cents >Buy one >Wake up next morning with hangover >See postcard >Look up online how to fill it out because who the f--- knows how to fill out a postcard in current year >Fill it out >Send to mom and dad >Just like two banal sentences about how I'm doing ok (a lie) and how I hope they are taking good care of my cat >Like 5 days later >Mom calls me to say how much getting that postcard meant to them >Says it made their entire week >Don't drink myself to sleep that night for the first time in a long time

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Anon gets a compliment from a stranger! | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/32/20(Fri)08:26:16 No.843691791 1607846755974.jpg| 90 KB JPG >taking piss at public urinal >guy walks in and starts using the one next to me >he looks over at me >'nice c--- bro, i bet you c-- alot right? Yeah i bet you do' We all need a compliment from time to time to make us feel good.
: Anonymous 12/32/20(Fri)08:26:16 No.843691791 1607846755974.jpg| 90 KB JPG >taking piss at public urinal >guy walks in and starts using the one next to me >he looks over at me >'nice c--- bro, i bet you c-- alot right? Yeah i bet you do' We all need a compliment from time to time to make us feel good.

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Anon encounters Anon | /r/Greentext


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Anon becomes a functioning member of society | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)17:42:33 No.66734422 2010 >NEET >spend all day on the computer >wake up at 12pm usually >go to sleep around 4am >no gf 77 KB JPG >no stress >unlimited free time >j------- whenever I want >sometimes j------- 3 times a day >alone time whenever I want >do what I want when I want >true freedom 2021 >married >have to go to extreme troubles to hide any p--- on my computer >can only go to 4chan in secrecy >no alone time >no free time >have to be up at 5:30 am for work >have to be in bed by 9:30pm >designated j------- time >have to give attention to spouse when home >can't go out alone because she starts calling >no freedom tfw I fell for the gf meme. I want to go back so badly bros. Why the f--- did I listen to you guys?
: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)17:42:33 No.66734422 2010 >NEET >spend all day on the computer >wake up at 12pm usually >go to sleep around 4am >no gf 77 KB JPG >no stress >unlimited free time >j------- whenever I want >sometimes j------- 3 times a day >alone time whenever I want >do what I want when I want >true freedom 2021 >married >have to go to extreme troubles to hide any p--- on my computer >can only go to 4chan in secrecy >no alone time >no free time >have to be up at 5:30 am for work >have to be in bed by 9:30pm >designated j------- time >have to give attention to spouse when home >can't go out alone because she starts calling >no freedom tfw I fell for the gf meme. I want to go back so badly bros. Why the f--- did I listen to you guys?

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Anon thinks about the planet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:25:21 No.869445300 I dont understand why are arent letting covid do it's thing. humans and over population are the true enemy of the planet. If we die, it's a good thing. Mother nature need sus to die. May as well trim off the fat with a disease that only kills boomers and immuno comprimised 66 KB JPG This is why I choose to not wear a mask. F--- people. and f--- strangers. If you're not my family or friend, then you're a c--- unless you prove me wrong : Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:28:02 No.869445444 : Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:31:19 No.869445633 >>869445300 (OP)_# >sus 8 KB JPG
: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:25:21 No.869445300 I dont understand why are arent letting covid do it's thing. humans and over population are the true enemy of the planet. If we die, it's a good thing. Mother nature need sus to die. May as well trim off the fat with a disease that only kills boomers and immuno comprimised 66 KB JPG This is why I choose to not wear a mask. F--- people. and f--- strangers. If you're not my family or friend, then you're a c--- unless you prove me wrong : Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:28:02 No.869445444 : Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:31:19 No.869445633 >>869445300 (OP)_# >sus 8 KB JPG

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Anon is hated by his parents | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:29:13 No.66742125 >be me >named striker >at coffee shop before I enter the wage cage >shop is relatively crowded >waiting for my coffee to be made so I sit in a booth with some 484 KB GIF teenagers behind me >barista screams out my order >I GOT AN ORDER FOR STRIKER >teenagers behind me start giggling and say that striker is a gay ass name >get to collect my coffee and leave in shame Just an average day with a gay ass name.
: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)21:29:13 No.66742125 >be me >named striker >at coffee shop before I enter the wage cage >shop is relatively crowded >waiting for my coffee to be made so I sit in a booth with some 484 KB GIF teenagers behind me >barista screams out my order >I GOT AN ORDER FOR STRIKER >teenagers behind me start giggling and say that striker is a gay ass name >get to collect my coffee and leave in shame Just an average day with a gay ass name.

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Anon is a rasict | /r/Greentext

>be me >Scrolling TikTok past bedtime >See a YouTuber react to a meme i made months ago >Lose my s--- >Can't believe it 40 KB JPG >Check the comments for the name of the guy >Lil bored X >Watch almost all his videos to see where my meme is >This guy is actually funny >Sub to him >l enjoy watching him >Decides to join his discord >First day goes well >Be today >l forgot i was not on 4chan and said i am rasict to Igbt >Mfw i got banned
>be me >Scrolling TikTok past bedtime >See a YouTuber react to a meme i made months ago >Lose my s--- >Can't believe it 40 KB JPG >Check the comments for the name of the guy >Lil bored X >Watch almost all his videos to see where my meme is >This guy is actually funny >Sub to him >l enjoy watching him >Decides to join his discord >First day goes well >Be today >l forgot i was not on 4chan and said i am rasict to Igbt >Mfw i got banned

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Anon likes Snickers | /r/Greentext

File: D587AAF2-C8C6-4C35-81E6-C(...).jpg (7 KB, 212x249) U Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)03:59:34 No.869443754 >>869443837 >>869443891 >>869444016 >>869444169 >>869444197 >>869444365 >>869444423 >>869444646 >>869444850 >>869445305 >>869445397 >be me >right by where I work there is a gas station >every day before I get to work I buy two snickers >during my lunch break I walk over and buy two more >when I finish my work day I stop by the gas station and buy two more >been doing this every day I work for two years >this morning walk into gas station to buy my snickers >there is a new kid l've never seen before at the cash register >put down my snickers >kid says >"h-------- are you the snickers guy" >I look at him confused >he says "I honestly thought they were joking about you" >lunch break rolls around so I walk back over >the kid is still there and he says while laughing >"h-------- you must love snickers" >I say “they are my favorite candy" >he laughs even harder >I didn't go back for a third time because I was embarrassed W--. Why the f--- are they talking about me when I'm not there? I thought people at cash registers didn't give a f--- about who goes in. W-- am I supposed to do now? O Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)04:01:04 No.869443837 ► >>869444228 >>869444879 >>869445361 >>869443754 (OP) You should go back in there and tell him you're going to become the s--- on the floor guy if he doesn't shut the f--- up.
File: D587AAF2-C8C6-4C35-81E6-C(...).jpg (7 KB, 212x249) U Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)03:59:34 No.869443754 >>869443837 >>869443891 >>869444016 >>869444169 >>869444197 >>869444365 >>869444423 >>869444646 >>869444850 >>869445305 >>869445397 >be me >right by where I work there is a gas station >every day before I get to work I buy two snickers >during my lunch break I walk over and buy two more >when I finish my work day I stop by the gas station and buy two more >been doing this every day I work for two years >this morning walk into gas station to buy my snickers >there is a new kid l've never seen before at the cash register >put down my snickers >kid says >"h-------- are you the snickers guy" >I look at him confused >he says "I honestly thought they were joking about you" >lunch break rolls around so I walk back over >the kid is still there and he says while laughing >"h-------- you must love snickers" >I say “they are my favorite candy" >he laughs even harder >I didn't go back for a third time because I was embarrassed W--. Why the f--- are they talking about me when I'm not there? I thought people at cash registers didn't give a f--- about who goes in. W-- am I supposed to do now? O Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)04:01:04 No.869443837 ► >>869444228 >>869444879 >>869445361 >>869443754 (OP) You should go back in there and tell him you're going to become the s--- on the floor guy if he doesn't shut the f--- up.

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Anon is an insomniac | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/07/20(Fri)06:51:11 No.833783188 >have you tried melatonin >have you tried sleeping pills? >it's because you drink too much caffeine man >you just need to stop worrying >well if you just got in bed and relaxed 33 KB JPG >if you'd get on a routine >if you'd go to bed earlier View Thread
: Anonymous 08/07/20(Fri)06:51:11 No.833783188 >have you tried melatonin >have you tried sleeping pills? >it's because you drink too much caffeine man >you just need to stop worrying >well if you just got in bed and relaxed 33 KB JPG >if you'd get on a routine >if you'd go to bed earlier View Thread

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Anon learns about truck drivers | /r/Greentext

onymous 12/26/21(Sun)18:50:33 No.24977124 >be me >Work within eyesight of a gas station >Most coworkers like to get gas there as it's fairly cheap compared to other stations nearby >Female coworker has a lifted truck 188 KB JPG with comically large tires >Coworker constantly bitches and moans about the cost to fuel up her car even when Trump was in office >Ask her why she doesn't get a smaller car if it's that much of an issue >Tells me I wouldn't understand and that she "needs" a truck because she lives in the country (10 minutes outside of the suburb i live in) and that the roads get too bad out there during the winter Fast forward to today >Wake up >Maybe 4 inches of snow on the road >Let my car heat up and head out about 10 minutes earlier than normal >Take turns slowly, keep my distance, and just drive carefully because I'm not super used to driving in the snow >Make it to work in one piece >work for about an hour >Phone starts ringing >It's Mrs pick-up truck >"Hey anon, I can't come into work today the roads are awful where I live" Do truck-tards really?
onymous 12/26/21(Sun)18:50:33 No.24977124 >be me >Work within eyesight of a gas station >Most coworkers like to get gas there as it's fairly cheap compared to other stations nearby >Female coworker has a lifted truck 188 KB JPG with comically large tires >Coworker constantly bitches and moans about the cost to fuel up her car even when Trump was in office >Ask her why she doesn't get a smaller car if it's that much of an issue >Tells me I wouldn't understand and that she "needs" a truck because she lives in the country (10 minutes outside of the suburb i live in) and that the roads get too bad out there during the winter Fast forward to today >Wake up >Maybe 4 inches of snow on the road >Let my car heat up and head out about 10 minutes earlier than normal >Take turns slowly, keep my distance, and just drive carefully because I'm not super used to driving in the snow >Make it to work in one piece >work for about an hour >Phone starts ringing >It's Mrs pick-up truck >"Hey anon, I can't come into work today the roads are awful where I live" Do truck-tards really?

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One man’s treasure is another man’s treasure | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous E 03/21/16(Mon)11:10:07 No.27303759 Why don't they make bulletproof vests out of diamond if it is the hardest metal? 5 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/21/16(Mon)11:11:28 No.27303774 Cause it's too heavy. 1 gram of diamond weighs something like 15 grams. >>27303789 # >>27303795 # >27303892 # >>27303924 # >>27304023 # >>27304509 #
| Anonymous E 03/21/16(Mon)11:10:07 No.27303759 Why don't they make bulletproof vests out of diamond if it is the hardest metal? 5 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/21/16(Mon)11:11:28 No.27303774 Cause it's too heavy. 1 gram of diamond weighs something like 15 grams. >>27303789 # >>27303795 # >27303892 # >>27303924 # >>27304023 # >>27304509 #

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Anon asserts his right to use self-defense. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.619019470 21 minutes ago >16 years old >walking to the bus stop to go to school >group of girls walking behind me >hear one say "you dare me?" >the other one say "I double dare you" >This bitch blindsides me and swings her fist into my temple from behind >Thatfuckishappening.jpg >l fall face first into concrete >the other two laugh as my nose bleed >get up >she got all up in my face, shoved me and yelled, "Whatchu gonna do about it, f-----? Hit a girl?" >Dont tempt me bitch >slammed my palm into her face and knocked her the f--- out >mfw they call me a monster >mfw they sream women beater What do you guys think of girls using their gender to protect themselves 5 replies
Anonymous No.619019470 21 minutes ago >16 years old >walking to the bus stop to go to school >group of girls walking behind me >hear one say "you dare me?" >the other one say "I double dare you" >This bitch blindsides me and swings her fist into my temple from behind >Thatfuckishappening.jpg >l fall face first into concrete >the other two laugh as my nose bleed >get up >she got all up in my face, shoved me and yelled, "Whatchu gonna do about it, f-----? Hit a girl?" >Dont tempt me bitch >slammed my palm into her face and knocked her the f--- out >mfw they call me a monster >mfw they sream women beater What do you guys think of girls using their gender to protect themselves 5 replies

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Anon is a cuck | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/27/17(Thu)11:49:09 No.29962622 >>29962627 >>29962630 >>29962632 >>29962658 >>29962668 >>29962675 >29962679 >>29962730 >>29962824 >>29963405 >>29964050 >>29964058 >>29962548 Assholes like you have ruined the cuckolding fetish for guys like me. Now it's just a stupid joke. F--- you. Anonymous 04/27/17(Thu)11:57:13 No.29962675 29962729 >>29962803 >>29962809 >>29962824 >>29962833 >>29962851 >>29962910 >>29962930 >>29963117 >>29963387 >>29963405 >>29963426 >29964058 >>29964091 File: 1304047 safe oc_humanize(...).png (99 KB, 700x599) >>29962710 >>29962718 >>29962622 It's almost like the thing you love has been f----- by another man.
Anonymous 04/27/17(Thu)11:49:09 No.29962622 >>29962627 >>29962630 >>29962632 >>29962658 >>29962668 >>29962675 >29962679 >>29962730 >>29962824 >>29963405 >>29964050 >>29964058 >>29962548 Assholes like you have ruined the cuckolding fetish for guys like me. Now it's just a stupid joke. F--- you. Anonymous 04/27/17(Thu)11:57:13 No.29962675 29962729 >>29962803 >>29962809 >>29962824 >>29962833 >>29962851 >>29962910 >>29962930 >>29963117 >>29963387 >>29963405 >>29963426 >29964058 >>29964091 File: 1304047 safe oc_humanize(...).png (99 KB, 700x599) >>29962710 >>29962718 >>29962622 It's almost like the thing you love has been f----- by another man.

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It goes on forever | /r/Greentext

1• #769367220 5/22/18, 4:30 PM >be me >american >go to school >don't get shot, because gun violence in america is very exaggerated by the media >go home >shoot myself 1 REPLY 2 #769367427 5/22/18 4:32 PM >>769367220 OP >Suicide is then reported in gun death statistics, without clarification, used to exaggerate gun violence by media It all comes full cycle
1• #769367220 5/22/18, 4:30 PM >be me >american >go to school >don't get shot, because gun violence in america is very exaggerated by the media >go home >shoot myself 1 REPLY 2 #769367427 5/22/18 4:32 PM >>769367220 OP >Suicide is then reported in gun death statistics, without clarification, used to exaggerate gun violence by media It all comes full cycle

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Anon gets a tip. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/28/19(Mon)03:44:07 No.1697183 >be me >Uber driver >mfw I receive a tip >remember etiquette from Reddit 66 KB PNG >passenger is already gone >say it to myself Thank you for the tip, kind stranger
: Anonymous 10/28/19(Mon)03:44:07 No.1697183 >be me >Uber driver >mfw I receive a tip >remember etiquette from Reddit 66 KB PNG >passenger is already gone >say it to myself Thank you for the tip, kind stranger

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Anon guessed it almost right | /r/Greentext

>went to a middle class elementary school >about 500 white kids and 1 black kid in the entire school >one day there was an announcement a little girl's bike got stolen >even as an 11 year old I thought to myself "it was probably the black kid" >a week later we found out it wasn't the black kid >it was the black kid's dad
>went to a middle class elementary school >about 500 white kids and 1 black kid in the entire school >one day there was an announcement a little girl's bike got stolen >even as an 11 year old I thought to myself "it was probably the black kid" >a week later we found out it wasn't the black kid >it was the black kid's dad

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Anon is an evolutionary failure | /r/Greentext


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anon meets an r/pcmr user | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/18/18(Mon)10:46:10 No.46196821 >be walking through town center >come across a father and his teen daughter having an argument >"Dad i dont want a f------ computer to game on, im getting a Xbox!" 42 KB JPG >"But computers are so much better! Arte you f------ dumb, im not letting you get an xbox!" >she turns away from him >father lets out a primal roar and tears off his trousers to reveal a 24 inch overclocked c--- with a GTX 1070 inserted into his b------- >he charges at his daughter and spears her up the ass >she melts into cooling fluid and spunk and drains back into his balls >Fathers balls swell to reveal their LED aesthetics >father turns to an onlooking woman who is quivvering and soaking >rams his overcock into her p---- >unloads his daughter into her >after 5 seconds woman gives birth to a teenage boy >he stands up >"hey dad can you help me build my PC please?" >father hugs him while sobbing with joy f------ hate PC master racers
: Anonymous 06/18/18(Mon)10:46:10 No.46196821 >be walking through town center >come across a father and his teen daughter having an argument >"Dad i dont want a f------ computer to game on, im getting a Xbox!" 42 KB JPG >"But computers are so much better! Arte you f------ dumb, im not letting you get an xbox!" >she turns away from him >father lets out a primal roar and tears off his trousers to reveal a 24 inch overclocked c--- with a GTX 1070 inserted into his b------- >he charges at his daughter and spears her up the ass >she melts into cooling fluid and spunk and drains back into his balls >Fathers balls swell to reveal their LED aesthetics >father turns to an onlooking woman who is quivvering and soaking >rams his overcock into her p---- >unloads his daughter into her >after 5 seconds woman gives birth to a teenage boy >he stands up >"hey dad can you help me build my PC please?" >father hugs him while sobbing with joy f------ hate PC master racers

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Anon lives that euro life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)15:25:46 No.869402369 >be me >Have mini heart attack >Emergency vehicle comes for me >Hospital takes care of me >Go home >No bill cause not American 31 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)15:31:22 No.869402634 >>869402369 (OP) # You fat f---
: Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)15:25:46 No.869402369 >be me >Have mini heart attack >Emergency vehicle comes for me >Hospital takes care of me >Go home >No bill cause not American 31 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/27/21(Mon)15:31:22 No.869402634 >>869402369 (OP) # You fat f---

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Anon likes how meat tastes. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 3wilSOp3 ) 12/27/21(Mon)19:17:47 No.353834041 >>353832682 # >be white person >be able to afford good cuts of meat >use limited amounts of seasoning because the food itself tastes good >be n----- >can only afford the cheapest cuts of meat byproducts there are >drench it in spices so you can't taste the hog anus
: Anonymous (ID: 3wilSOp3 ) 12/27/21(Mon)19:17:47 No.353834041 >>353832682 # >be white person >be able to afford good cuts of meat >use limited amounts of seasoning because the food itself tastes good >be n----- >can only afford the cheapest cuts of meat byproducts there are >drench it in spices so you can't taste the hog anus

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