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Back the f--- up and sit your ass down because you're about to get schooled in how to be a FINE ASS M-----------. This ain't some weak-ass Lost Boys Dracula b-------, son, this is the 100% prime vampire man meat called 8rICo^QRTHMAN His font's all swirly and s---, goddamn and you'd best f------ RECOGNIZE. He's not some punk bitch turned during the Civil War, this smooth m----------- was all up in that VIKING s---, nailing those crazy opera bitches with the long-ass braids and discovering America way before that bitch Columbus got his sugar daddy to send him over there. Hell, you know his fine ass was tapping Grendel's mom or some s---, just LOOK AT HIM. Angelina Jolie, goddamn. He's been around so long he's f----- all the hotties in the northern hemisphere AND THEIR MOMMAS AND GRANNIES and he's STILL a mad p---- hound. All he's gotta do is LOOK at you and your underwear go up in a PUFF OF SMOKE like that Bill bitch at noon on South Beach. This pimp is so good it only takes him like 5 seconds to get to 3RD BASE with a bitch who is undercover trying to save her BOYFRIEND. Amnesia? That don't slow a player down, he'll give you so much sweet lovin you'll have to date a f------ TIGER or some s--- after because NORMAL C--- JUST AIN'T CUTTING IT ANYMORE. AND DID I MENTION THAT HE'S A VAMPIRE? You know that means he can kick your ass in ways you ain't even DREAMED OF and YOU'LL NEVER EVEN SEE IT COMING. S---, this GQMF has ELVIS on his payroll, that right there should tell you all you need to know. And sure, he can't come in unless you invite him, but one look at that sweet blond ass and you'll be BUTT NAKED telling him to COME ANYWHERE HE PLEASES. It hurts so good.

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LISTEN UP CUMSLUTS DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS IS? >hurr durr its boba fett >It's Doomguy lol >is that Master Chief WRONG YOU F------ COCKSOCK sit your bitch ass down and listen for five goddamn minutes <--THIS BITCH RIGHT HERE IS SAMUS M------------ ARAN WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE? OF COURSE YOU DO, F------ YOU SEE THIS--> S---?! THAT'S A M------------ ARM CANNON AND IT HAS ENOUGH FIREPOWER TO WIPE OUT EVERY SINGLE MILITARY ON THIS EARTH BY ITSELF >"b-but that's impractical, that means he only has one hand free" F--- YOU, BITCH SAMUS IS A STRONG, INDEPENDENT™ WOMAN WHO ONLY NEEDS ONE HAND TO F--- YOUR S--- JUST LOOK AT HER • HOT AS F--- BLUE LATEX SUIT • TOWERS OVER MANLET P------ LIKE YOU AT 6 FOOT 3 198 POUNDS OF PURE F------ MUSCLE • RAISED AND GENETICALLY ENHANCED BY M------------ BIRD PEOPLE • LOOK AT THAT PONYTAIL GODDAMN • ROCKET-PROPELLED HIGH HEELS TO STEP ON YOU WITH • LASER GUN THAT CAN BECOME A WHIP • NICE T--- AND ASS TOO ALSO, SHE'S BLOWN UP PLANETS THAT'S RIGHT, A------- PLANETS SARAH CONNOR AIN'T GOT S--- ON THAT STILL NOT CONVINCED THAT SHE'S A BADASS BITCH? LOOK AT THIS S--- she turns into a f------ SPHERE like she's goddamn Optimus Prime or some s--- BASICALLY, WHAT I'M SAYING IS ALL OTHER WAIFUS ARE S--- AND YOU. ARENT. F------. WORTHY. YOU CAN ONLY DREAM ABOUT BASKING IN HER GLORY

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YALL N----- TRYNA SAVE FIFTEEN PERCENT?

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Back the f--- up and sit your ass down because you're about to get schooled in how to be a FINE ASS M-----------. This ain't some weak-ass Lost Boys Dracula b-------, son, this is the 100% prime vampire man meat called 8rICo^QRTHMAN His font's all swirly and s---, goddamn and you'd best f------ RECOGNIZE. He's not some punk bitch turned during the Civil War, this smooth m----------- was all up in that VIKING s---, nailing those crazy opera bitches with the long-ass braids and discovering America way before that bitch Columbus got his sugar daddy to send him over there. Hell, you know his fine ass was tapping Grendel's mom or some s---, just LOOK AT HIM. Angelina Jolie, goddamn. He's been around so long he's f----- all the hotties in the northern hemisphere AND THEIR MOMMAS AND GRANNIES and he's STILL a mad p---- hound. All he's gotta do is LOOK at you and your underwear go up in a PUFF OF SMOKE like that Bill bitch at noon on South Beach. This pimp is so good it only takes him like 5 seconds to get to 3RD BASE with a bitch who is undercover trying to save her BOYFRIEND. Amnesia? That don't slow a player down, he'll give you so much sweet lovin you'll have to date a f------ TIGER or some s--- after because NORMAL C--- JUST AIN'T CUTTING IT ANYMORE. AND DID I MENTION THAT HE'S A VAMPIRE? You know that means he can kick your ass in ways you ain't even DREAMED OF and YOU'LL NEVER EVEN SEE IT COMING. S---, this GQMF has ELVIS on his payroll, that right there should tell you all you need to know. And sure, he can't come in unless you invite him, but one look at that sweet blond ass and you'll be BUTT NAKED telling him to COME ANYWHERE HE PLEASES. It hurts so good.

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