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You Will Never Be A Real Woman - Chicanery edit

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You will never be a real lawyer. You have no drive, you have no ethics, you have no dignity. You are a chimp with a machine gun twisted by chicanery into a crude mockery of the law. All the "clients" you get are guilty. Behind your back, Hamlin mocks you. Your brother is disgusted and ashamed of you, your "colleagues" laugh at your buffoonish antics behind closed doors. The New Mexico Bar is utterly repulsed by you. Hundreds of years of practice have allowed lawyers to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even ambulance chasers who "pass" the bar are only ever hired by guilty people. Your office in the back of a nail salon is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to land a semi-respectable job, they'll turn tail and bolt the second they get a whiff of your lazy, half-assed work ethic. You will never be successful. You eek out an existence every single morning and tell yourself it's going to be okay, but deep inside you feel failure creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight. Eventually, your past will catch up with you - you'll be found hiding in a dumpster in Omaha Nebraska with a burner phone, and locked up for the rest of your miserable life. Wexler will visit you, heartbroken but relieved that she no longer has to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. She'll leave you to rot under some moronic assumed name, and everyone in that prison for the rest of your life will know you are a criminal. Your 15 minutes of fame will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a correspondence degree from the University of American Samoa. (go landcrabs) This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

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