when you care more about your dnd characters life & accomplishments than your own

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No sun here Once upon a time in Ravenloft We are trapped Gods don't respond Strahd is toying with us No slavery I have found an iron sword Finally no heat! Granny gave me a pastry with my favorite filling That's a nightmare... Came from FORGOTTEN REALIS I would live here! Local Sorcerer King invited for a dinner Came from DARK SUN D GENIDO

and i was like "my eternal slave says what?" and he totally fell for it you know you don't need to do that right? what do you mean? but that's no fun! you don't need to rely on wordplay. mortals will just sign that stuff away willingly. it's efficient. there's no ambiguity in ownership. and it's always a laugh to see them trade so much for so little. speaking of, you still I owe me that soul. $ for the last time. nothing a pact of the fiend warlock says or does in the feywild is legally binding.

Wizard: I cast Wish. DM: Okay, what do you wish for? Wizard: I wish the BBEG would disappear. DM: Granted, the BBEG is now fully invisible. THE REST OF THE PARTY THE WIZARD

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The Undead Impersonators: The Art of Fake It 'Til You Make It | /r/dndmemes

The Party: We can't take on all the undead. Can we roll performance or deception to fool them into thinking we're one of them? DM: Checks notes and stats* There's no way you'll get far but I'll allow it. The Party 10 minutes later:

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Concoctions, Ungwents & Salves – potions and cures by Wallace Greene | /r/dndmemes

W C,V.S By Wallace greene

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Dice D&D community I just think they're neat

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"Come with me, young adventurer, and I will show you eternity." Shriek followed by sickening crunch | /r/dndmemes

THE DM IS USING THE NEW SNAKE-LIKE GREEN DRAGON DESIGN FOR THEIR NEW ONESHOT THE DRAGON HAS BEEN MOSTLY KILLING PEOPLE WITH HIS VENOMOUS BITE, NOT HIS BREATH WEAPON HE LIVES IN AN OLD QUARRY AND IS SAID TO HAVE A LEGENDARY SWORD IN HIS HOARD HE CHARACTERIZES HIMSELF AS DEATH ITSELF AND HISSES HIS NAME EVERY TIME HE ENCOUNTERS PREY THE DM HAS THE ENTIRE REDWALL BOOK SERIES ON HIS SHELF BEHIND HIM imgflip.com F

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Whenever my players get too friendly with the nameless NPCs | /r/dndmemes

Players: Thank you so much! What's your name? GM: NPC: I got no name. He's got no name. B33EA

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High-level wizard appreciation post | /r/dndmemes

Profits from selling fabricated goods spent on buying a fleet of spelljammers Familiar double TP'd into time dragon wyrmling and aged up to Ancient via ghost tech to enable 8000 years/day time travel No longer uses Phantom Steed for travel and kiting because planar bound dybbuk exists and is 250% faster Planar bound xorns yearn for the mines Throws prisoners into the Negative Energy Plane to farm nightwalkers First person to run Doom on a Magic Mouth computer Published 10 million page scientific paper about how bears are fish that he wrote in 10 minutes using Fabricate The Archmage Makes pacts that benefit him with planar bound devils Cast Find Greater Steed via Wish just because you can Wizard tower built using spells protected by Hallow, Druid Grove, Guards and Wards, Forbiddance, Private Sanctum and more TP self into vampire to kill commoners and make army of vampire spawn Every minion has a pact with a daemogoth titan obtained via True Polymorph, free cast of an 8th-level ench/necro spell once per day Won 400 larvae, property and divine status by cheating at the Fortune's Wheel casino in Sigil, they can't prove anything Conjured Couatl uses Change Shape to grant alignment- appropriate lycanthropy Magic jarred into the peak form (adult metallic dragon Change Shaped into exhaustion-immune humanoid like Duergar Despot) Simulacrum Standing army of 10,000 skeletons Swarms of gremishkas to make spells autohit

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00 The Endless Tide 100 of common stains ORIGINAL ∞ LOADS 80 Wondrous ITem, Uncommon The Endless Tide is a miracle of modern Conjuration magic. As an action, a creature may pour a liter of blue, soapy liquid out of the pitcher. After 1 hour this liquid dries into an opaque soap-like substance. The soap is identical to regular soap in every way, except that it is more conductive to magical energies. Any magic item using this soap as a component has their crafting DC reduced by 2 and crafting cost reduced by 10% or 50gp, whichever is lesser.

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Little guy never saw it comming | /r/dndmemes

ALLETL HIGH-SPEED THE 7 HP GOBLIN WHO CHALLENGED THE ARTIFICER TO SEE WHO WAS THE BETTER SHOT imgflip.com

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For the sake of not being dragged naked through the streets and Flayed alive - this is a joke | /r/dndmemes

MY DM WATCHING ME DUMPSTAT MY LVL 1 WIZARD'S CONSTITUTION (WE ARE ROLLING OUR STATS AND I AM WAITING FOR A GOOD SET. THIS IS MY 3RD CHARACTER THIS SESSION) imgflip.com

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Dungeons and Dragons - In fairness, my D&D character actually has a life and accomplishments.. | /r/dndmemes

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