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Anon still No Success | /r/Greentext

24 KB JPG >be me >0 success with women >be kind of a shy beta >decide to improve >start working out >get a better job >improve social skills >engage in hobbies >dress better >better hygiene >become more confident And now, 2 years into this self-improvement and conditioning to become a better man than I was before I can happily report to you that I still have 0 success.
24 KB JPG >be me >0 success with women >be kind of a shy beta >decide to improve >start working out >get a better job >improve social skills >engage in hobbies >dress better >better hygiene >become more confident And now, 2 years into this self-improvement and conditioning to become a better man than I was before I can happily report to you that I still have 0 success.

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Anon got jelous. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/02/23(Thu)23:03:11 No.72428927 >At gym today >Some zoomer is there with his gf >She's exactly my type >Wearing black yoga pants with 11 KB PNG perfect ass other >Overhear how they talk to each >"You know whats cute? You are." Why couldn't that be me?
Anonymous 03/02/23(Thu)23:03:11 No.72428927 >At gym today >Some zoomer is there with his gf >She's exactly my type >Wearing black yoga pants with 11 KB PNG perfect ass other >Overhear how they talk to each >"You know whats cute? You are." Why couldn't that be me?

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Anon Hates Wat Tambor | /r/Greentext

File: Wat Tambor.png (654 KB, 1280x524) ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:01:43 No.217939841 >>217940298 >>217940461 >>217940472 >>217940526 >>217941099 >>217946382 >>217946555 >>217946575 >>217948755 >>217949031 >>217949574 >The Techno Union army bwoeeoewoewoeeowoe is at your disposal Count *sigh* yeah great scene George ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:18:52 No.217940120 >>217940364 >>217940388 >>217940666 >>217948764 >>217948933 >>217940243 >>217940268 And yet scenes like this are more memorable than anything from the sequel trilogy >> ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:25:51 No.217940243 >>217944320 File: EM-aYgvVUAAjO1z.jpg (89 KB, 1031x804) >>217940120 Yes they are less s--- than the sequels ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:40:57 No.217940461 ►>>217942930 >>217948793 File: sanhill.jpg (81 KB, 1175x661) >>217939841 (OP) The Banking Clan will sign your treaty Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:41:24 No.217940465 SOVL Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)12:13:16 No.217942741 >Dude representing a union about technology's tech is wonky and breaks down right as he's introducing himself Not a good look ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)12:25:39 No.217942930 >>217940461 >banking clan >not a guild or any other type of association >literally an ethnic tribe >that controls banking What did George mean by this? ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)21:19:23 No.217948755 >>217939841 (OP). i wanted more of these guys. ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)22:51:25 No.217949574 >>217939841 (OP) >more memorable the entire sequel trilogy >>217948910
File: Wat Tambor.png (654 KB, 1280x524) ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:01:43 No.217939841 >>217940298 >>217940461 >>217940472 >>217940526 >>217941099 >>217946382 >>217946555 >>217946575 >>217948755 >>217949031 >>217949574 >The Techno Union army bwoeeoewoewoeeowoe is at your disposal Count *sigh* yeah great scene George ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:18:52 No.217940120 >>217940364 >>217940388 >>217940666 >>217948764 >>217948933 >>217940243 >>217940268 And yet scenes like this are more memorable than anything from the sequel trilogy >> ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:25:51 No.217940243 >>217944320 File: EM-aYgvVUAAjO1z.jpg (89 KB, 1031x804) >>217940120 Yes they are less s--- than the sequels ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:40:57 No.217940461 ►>>217942930 >>217948793 File: sanhill.jpg (81 KB, 1175x661) >>217939841 (OP) The Banking Clan will sign your treaty Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)09:41:24 No.217940465 SOVL Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)12:13:16 No.217942741 >Dude representing a union about technology's tech is wonky and breaks down right as he's introducing himself Not a good look ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)12:25:39 No.217942930 >>217940461 >banking clan >not a guild or any other type of association >literally an ethnic tribe >that controls banking What did George mean by this? ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)21:19:23 No.217948755 >>217939841 (OP). i wanted more of these guys. ☐ Anonymous 02/13/26(Fri)22:51:25 No.217949574 >>217939841 (OP) >more memorable the entire sequel trilogy >>217948910

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Ask girl out on a date she says yes | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/26/14(Sun)23:45:49 No.29298147 >ask girl out on a date >she says yes >ask her what time her dad can drive us to the movies >she just gives me a blank stare 153 KB JPG >ok well you guys should pick me up around 7 >give her fist bump and run home in excitement >her and her dad pick me up around 7 >no one says a word on the way there >he drops us off >as I'm getting out of the car I stop and ask him for the money for the movie >he just stares at me >politely inform him movies don't grow on trees >he gives me $30
Anonymous 10/26/14(Sun)23:45:49 No.29298147 >ask girl out on a date >she says yes >ask her what time her dad can drive us to the movies >she just gives me a blank stare 153 KB JPG >ok well you guys should pick me up around 7 >give her fist bump and run home in excitement >her and her dad pick me up around 7 >no one says a word on the way there >he drops us off >as I'm getting out of the car I stop and ask him for the money for the movie >he just stares at me >politely inform him movies don't grow on trees >he gives me $30

Greentext Stories

First month in gym | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 30 KB JPG 04/27/21(Tue)02:02:40 No.61176759 >>61173933 (OP) # F--- I can actually relate to this >first month in gym >getting used to talking with people, gym lingo, not being intimidated by people using the weights etc >need to take a mad s--- >go to the bathroom, all the stalls are occupied >brain is on full autopilot >knock and ask the guy "how many sets do you have left in there" >realize what I just said >hear the guy inside say what the f--- man >all others laughing >run out and don't come back for a few days >realize no one found out It still keeps me up at night bros
Anonymous 30 KB JPG 04/27/21(Tue)02:02:40 No.61176759 >>61173933 (OP) # F--- I can actually relate to this >first month in gym >getting used to talking with people, gym lingo, not being intimidated by people using the weights etc >need to take a mad s--- >go to the bathroom, all the stalls are occupied >brain is on full autopilot >knock and ask the guy "how many sets do you have left in there" >realize what I just said >hear the guy inside say what the f--- man >all others laughing >run out and don't come back for a few days >realize no one found out It still keeps me up at night bros

Greentext Stories

Goto a tim horton's every night after leaving work or in the day before l head into work | /r/Greent...

Anonymous 07/05/23(Wed) 01:38:29 No.73910140 >Goto a tim horton's every night after leaving work or in the day before I head into work C-- >Crack jokes at the menu speaker every night and day to improve wagies day 10 KB PNG serving me >Start learning their names and being nice to them >The workers start to look forward to >Order the same thing every day >Small ice cap >Eventually they start to call me Iceboy >Even make a connection with the branch manager >One day I'm in with the manager ordering >"Wow Iceboy you really come every day huh" >"Yup this is the only place I'll ever come to!" >They smile and hand me a LARGE ice cap for the price of a small HolyFuckStonks.jpg >All the sudden I always get large instead of small for free when I drive through sometimes they throw in a bagel or muffin >Goes on for four months >Fast forward to the other day >The branch is closed for July 1st F--- WantMylceCap.mp4 >Drive over to the mcdonalds cause they're still open and don't give a s--- about their workers >"Hey can I get a small ice coffee frappe?" >"Ice boy?" W--.mp4 >The one night tim hortons worker worked there too >Apparently works between them for more hours >Next morning driving through Tims >Get handed a small by the manager >"Mcdonalds huh" Mfw ifunny.co
Anonymous 07/05/23(Wed) 01:38:29 No.73910140 >Goto a tim horton's every night after leaving work or in the day before I head into work C-- >Crack jokes at the menu speaker every night and day to improve wagies day 10 KB PNG serving me >Start learning their names and being nice to them >The workers start to look forward to >Order the same thing every day >Small ice cap >Eventually they start to call me Iceboy >Even make a connection with the branch manager >One day I'm in with the manager ordering >"Wow Iceboy you really come every day huh" >"Yup this is the only place I'll ever come to!" >They smile and hand me a LARGE ice cap for the price of a small HolyFuckStonks.jpg >All the sudden I always get large instead of small for free when I drive through sometimes they throw in a bagel or muffin >Goes on for four months >Fast forward to the other day >The branch is closed for July 1st F--- WantMylceCap.mp4 >Drive over to the mcdonalds cause they're still open and don't give a s--- about their workers >"Hey can I get a small ice coffee frappe?" >"Ice boy?" W--.mp4 >The one night tim hortons worker worked there too >Apparently works between them for more hours >Next morning driving through Tims >Get handed a small by the manager >"Mcdonalds huh" Mfw ifunny.co

Greentext Stories

I Am An Ordinary Man. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Lawrence of ARABIA 160 KB JPG 03/23/26(Mon)17:40:21 No.218864015 >dad used to watch Lawrence of Arabia once a week >dad retired a decade ago and now watches Lawrence of Arabia almost every single day >still watching the same DVD copy he got 20 years ago >got a Blu-Ray player a couple years ago and never had any desire to get Lawrence of Arabia on Blu-Ray At this point I've decided to just respect his Lawrence of Arabia autism
Anonymous Lawrence of ARABIA 160 KB JPG 03/23/26(Mon)17:40:21 No.218864015 >dad used to watch Lawrence of Arabia once a week >dad retired a decade ago and now watches Lawrence of Arabia almost every single day >still watching the same DVD copy he got 20 years ago >got a Blu-Ray player a couple years ago and never had any desire to get Lawrence of Arabia on Blu-Ray At this point I've decided to just respect his Lawrence of Arabia autism

Greentext Stories

Getting my nuggets fell up because l had a pain | /r/Greentext

06/30/14(Mon)05:16:13 No.553960047 >At doctors >Getting my nuggets felt up because I had a pain >Female doctor >Turns out fine, just epidydimitis >For some reason whenever I go to the docs I always feel I have to look smart >Throwing off medical jargon and referencing obscure bits of anatomy >S--- I must look hella booklearned >She says "Oh I suppose you were worried and did some of your own research" >Realize that if I admit to that I'm simultaneously admitting to being a little bitch and that all my knowledge was ad- hoc and wikipedia acquired >Say "No, I just know a lot about balls" >Cant remember what happened after that because my soul evacuated my body
06/30/14(Mon)05:16:13 No.553960047 >At doctors >Getting my nuggets felt up because I had a pain >Female doctor >Turns out fine, just epidydimitis >For some reason whenever I go to the docs I always feel I have to look smart >Throwing off medical jargon and referencing obscure bits of anatomy >S--- I must look hella booklearned >She says "Oh I suppose you were worried and did some of your own research" >Realize that if I admit to that I'm simultaneously admitting to being a little bitch and that all my knowledge was ad- hoc and wikipedia acquired >Say "No, I just know a lot about balls" >Cant remember what happened after that because my soul evacuated my body

Greentext Stories

Sorry I'm ultra high | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 518 KB PNG 10/28/20(Wed)13:23:23 No.141352899 >Yes well done Slitherin, you managed to obtain the highest number of points by studying hard and being the best performing house and in a meritocratic system such as this wizarding school you have every right to earn the first place and me awarding points out of thin air would be an extreme abuse of my authority as the head master of this institution... HOWEVER Anonymous 10/28/20(Wed)13:24:43 No.141352946 >>141352899 (OP) # >...it turns out fame IS everything! Harry Potter house - I mean Hogwarts house wins yet again! >>141352969 # >>141353068 # >>141353121 # : Anonymous >>141352946 # 10/28/20(Wed)13:25:44 No.141352969 Gryffindor house* sorry I'm ultra high >>141353121 # Anonymous 10/28/20(Wed)13:30:43 No.141353121 >>141352946 # >>141352969 # If you read these as Dumbledore it sill makes sense.
Anonymous 518 KB PNG 10/28/20(Wed)13:23:23 No.141352899 >Yes well done Slitherin, you managed to obtain the highest number of points by studying hard and being the best performing house and in a meritocratic system such as this wizarding school you have every right to earn the first place and me awarding points out of thin air would be an extreme abuse of my authority as the head master of this institution... HOWEVER Anonymous 10/28/20(Wed)13:24:43 No.141352946 >>141352899 (OP) # >...it turns out fame IS everything! Harry Potter house - I mean Hogwarts house wins yet again! >>141352969 # >>141353068 # >>141353121 # : Anonymous >>141352946 # 10/28/20(Wed)13:25:44 No.141352969 Gryffindor house* sorry I'm ultra high >>141353121 # Anonymous 10/28/20(Wed)13:30:43 No.141353121 >>141352946 # >>141352969 # If you read these as Dumbledore it sill makes sense.

Greentext Stories

Female Logic | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/06/26(Sun)14:47:51 No.747006338 >draw a man >call it a man >"fans" 20 years later who dont play video games pretend its a woman I'm a guy. 1.14 MB PNG Anonymous 09/06/26(Sun)14:51:08 No.747006535 >>747006338 (OP) # Amazing how her parents knew she was trans when she was born >>747006647 # Anonymous [Worried laughter.] 59 KB JPG 09/06/26(Sun)14:52:50 No.747006647 >>747006535 # >mfw every trans icon was openly groomed and traumatized, completely breaking them
Anonymous 09/06/26(Sun)14:47:51 No.747006338 >draw a man >call it a man >"fans" 20 years later who dont play video games pretend its a woman I'm a guy. 1.14 MB PNG Anonymous 09/06/26(Sun)14:51:08 No.747006535 >>747006338 (OP) # Amazing how her parents knew she was trans when she was born >>747006647 # Anonymous [Worried laughter.] 59 KB JPG 09/06/26(Sun)14:52:50 No.747006647 >>747006535 # >mfw every trans icon was openly groomed and traumatized, completely breaking them

Greentext Stories

Home Guard | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/05/26(Fri)11:15:11 No.23895751 big-rei-mogudan.jpg 74 KB JPG >this is how Rebuild of Evangelion should've ended
Anonymous 06/05/26(Fri)11:15:11 No.23895751 big-rei-mogudan.jpg 74 KB JPG >this is how Rebuild of Evangelion should've ended

Greentext Stories

Anon about cavediving | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/17/26(Thu)02:12:28 No.747854190 >Men who make $300k a year and have multiple children actually think to themselves "yes let me get into cavediving, where I can drown at any moment" >>747854359 # >>747854493 # Anonymou >>7478540 I thought a trolling for i : Anonymou >>7478540 Anonymous 09/17/26(Thu)02:21:04 No.747854493 1.35 MB JPG >>747854190 # I have come to the conclusion that it starts as an addiction but after a certain point it just Someone p becomes an elaborate means of suicide for these people. It's the Anonymou same for all extreme >>7478540 >farther sports/adventure types, eventually they just start doing this stuff to see if they'll die.
: Anonymous 09/17/26(Thu)02:12:28 No.747854190 >Men who make $300k a year and have multiple children actually think to themselves "yes let me get into cavediving, where I can drown at any moment" >>747854359 # >>747854493 # Anonymou >>7478540 I thought a trolling for i : Anonymou >>7478540 Anonymous 09/17/26(Thu)02:21:04 No.747854493 1.35 MB JPG >>747854190 # I have come to the conclusion that it starts as an addiction but after a certain point it just Someone p becomes an elaborate means of suicide for these people. It's the Anonymou same for all extreme >>7478540 >farther sports/adventure types, eventually they just start doing this stuff to see if they'll die.

Greentext Stories

Anon wants to help his mom | /r/Greentext

What sea monsters should be in a children's book? What sea monsters should be in(...) 09/18/26(Fri)20:53:09 No.5161944 Sea Monsters Adan Gentle Mark Jer 142 KB JPG Hi /an/ >My mom is a substitute teacher for special ed kindergarteners. >She purchased pic rel in a book haul for the kids. >She then asked me to pronounce the species names like Dunkleosteus and Helicoprion. >By the end of it, we realized this might be too scary to even be let into special ed. But I maintain, this kind of thing would be one kid's favorite Dino book. So I want to write an autism friendly sea monster book. What are some weird or less scary prehistoric animals that should make the cut? For context, this class is not mildly retarded. We're talking about kids who can't speak, barely control their actions, and one Hispanic kid that shouldn't even be there. And a 12 year old who's so far on the spectrum, a different kindergarten class has been dropping him off into my mom's class.
What sea monsters should be in a children's book? What sea monsters should be in(...) 09/18/26(Fri)20:53:09 No.5161944 Sea Monsters Adan Gentle Mark Jer 142 KB JPG Hi /an/ >My mom is a substitute teacher for special ed kindergarteners. >She purchased pic rel in a book haul for the kids. >She then asked me to pronounce the species names like Dunkleosteus and Helicoprion. >By the end of it, we realized this might be too scary to even be let into special ed. But I maintain, this kind of thing would be one kid's favorite Dino book. So I want to write an autism friendly sea monster book. What are some weird or less scary prehistoric animals that should make the cut? For context, this class is not mildly retarded. We're talking about kids who can't speak, barely control their actions, and one Hispanic kid that shouldn't even be there. And a 12 year old who's so far on the spectrum, a different kindergarten class has been dropping him off into my mom's class.

Greentext Stories

Anon might be straight | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/13/19(Tue)01:30:00 No.53878455 >>53878439 >she if it has a penis it isnt a "she" Anonymous 08/13/19(Tue)01:30:54 No.53878466 File: 410gxVYu08L SX425 jpg (21 KB, 425x408) >>53878455 >>53878466 >>53878475 >>53878515 I'm straight so whatever makes my d--- hard is a woman
Anonymous 08/13/19(Tue)01:30:00 No.53878455 >>53878439 >she if it has a penis it isnt a "she" Anonymous 08/13/19(Tue)01:30:54 No.53878466 File: 410gxVYu08L SX425 jpg (21 KB, 425x408) >>53878455 >>53878466 >>53878475 >>53878515 I'm straight so whatever makes my d--- hard is a woman

Greentext Stories

Anon learns ignore was bliss | /r/Greentext

File: 710Uj8te4qL.jpg (150 KB, 766x1088) PlayStation 2 TRUECRIME NEW YORK CITY ☐ Anonymous 09/13/26(Sun)11:15:41 No.12813307 >play game as a kid >enjoy it >look it up as an adult >find out it was mocked as a buggy laughing stock
File: 710Uj8te4qL.jpg (150 KB, 766x1088) PlayStation 2 TRUECRIME NEW YORK CITY ☐ Anonymous 09/13/26(Sun)11:15:41 No.12813307 >play game as a kid >enjoy it >look it up as an adult >find out it was mocked as a buggy laughing stock

Greentext Stories

Atleast this way we know whi is getting the money. | /r/Greentext

| | nonymous (ID: 5KPX2ZJC) 03/04/19(Mon) 15:01 >be me >Police court >Need to go to a hearing, look at a fine of €500 >Get lawyer >Brings fine down to €200 >Billed €600 by lawyer Thanks I guess
| | nonymous (ID: 5KPX2ZJC) 03/04/19(Mon) 15:01 >be me >Police court >Need to go to a hearing, look at a fine of €500 >Get lawyer >Brings fine down to €200 >Billed €600 by lawyer Thanks I guess

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