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"I know this is a big day for you, but we're on vacation! Be professional!"

Everyone begins freaking out when the sex worker they hired goes into labor. Except for Ernie, who begins shouting angrily at the baby for not telling him its rates.

Everyone begins freaking out when the sex worker they hired goes into labor. Except for Ernie, who begins shouting angrily at the baby for not telling him its rates.

ernie dark humor sex worker prostitute birth

Far Out Man!

The disease became an airborne pandemic when Big Bird finally succumbed to the Hippie Plague.

The disease became an airborne pandemic when Big Bird finally succumbed to the Hippie Plague.

sesame street big bird elmo hippies

Untitled Beaker Game

#THEGAMEAWARDS Bunsen can barely contain his immortal rage and disgust as Beaker f---- around in a VR hentai game on stage

#THEGAMEAWARDS Bunsen can barely contain his immortal rage and disgust as Beaker f---- around in a VR hentai game on stage

game awards 2019 bunsen beaker muppets

They’re both owned by Disney, so it’s a family thing.

#THEGAMEAWARDS Bunson and Beaker announce their plan to assassinate Masahiro Sakurai unless he adds Sora into Smash Bros

#THEGAMEAWARDS Bunson and Beaker announce their plan to assassinate Masahiro Sakurai unless he adds Sora into Smash Bros

dr bunson honeydew muppets the game awards masahiro sakurai super smash bros ultimate sora kingdom hearts disney

In Memoriam of Caroll Spinney

l'll Miss You, Mr.Hooper SESAME STREET Based on the Sesame Street Television Script by Norman Stiles Illustrated by Joe Mathieu Featuring Big Bird, a Jim Henson Sesame Street Muppet Mr.Hooper As Big Bird enters the gates of Heaven, he couldn't help but feel excited to have the chance to show Mr. Hooper his drawing. Not only was Mr. Hooper there, but his other father, Jim, Jerry, Richard, and many others were there, as well.

l'll Miss You, Mr.Hooper SESAME STREET Based on the Sesame Street Television Script by Norman Stiles Illustrated by Joe Mathieu Featuring Big Bird, a Jim Henson Sesame Street Muppet Mr.Hooper As Big Bird enters the gates of Heaven, he couldn't help but feel excited to have the chance to show Mr. Hooper his drawing. Not only was Mr. Hooper there, but his other father, Jim, Jerry, Richard, and many others were there, as well.

big bird wholesome mr. hooper

This was the beginning of Ernie's descent into insanity

"Ernie forget about me it's been 3 years, the accident wasn't your fault." says the disembodied voice of Bert. Ernie refuses to listen and still tucks him to sleep every night.

"Ernie forget about me it's been 3 years, the accident wasn't your fault." says the disembodied voice of Bert. Ernie refuses to listen and still tucks him to sleep every night.

ernie bert the crash wasn't your fault bed depressing bertstrip

Big Bird gets roasted

PLEASE PUT TRASH HERE Elmo shows Big Bird where he can drop his mixtape

PLEASE PUT TRASH HERE Elmo shows Big Bird where he can drop his mixtape

elmo big bird mixtape trash

"Educational" Purposes

Big Bird shows the local children his playboy magazines as part of a sex ed session.

Big Bird shows the local children his playboy magazines as part of a sex ed session.

big bird playboy

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?!

Having recovered from his sleep paralysis roughly five minutes ago, Ernie wonders why the dark figure still lingers in the corner.

Having recovered from his sleep paralysis roughly five minutes ago, Ernie wonders why the dark figure still lingers in the corner.

ernie creepy shadow sleep paralysis nightmare demon

Esidisi

The debate over AC vs DC was heating up, as Team Tesla got Telly to s--- his pants first.

The debate over AC vs DC was heating up, as Team Tesla got Telly to s--- his pants first.

ac/dc alternating current direct current electromagnetism physics telly edison tesla (not the car) tesla thomas edison nikola tesla

Silent Night, Unholy Night

It wasn't until after completing the ritual to summon the Dark Lord of Hell into the mortal realm did Bert realize that Ernie was dyslexic

It wasn't until after completing the ritual to summon the Dark Lord of Hell into the mortal realm did Bert realize that Ernie was dyslexic

bert ernie santa claus christmas santa satan dyslexia summoning

Never call up what you can't put down

BERT SCANS THE BOOK, LOOKING FOR A WAY TO UNSUMMON THE DEMON, WHILE ERNIE STARES, AMAZED AT THE AMOUNT OF BLOOD IN A HUMAN BODY

BERT SCANS THE BOOK, LOOKING FOR A WAY TO UNSUMMON THE DEMON, WHILE ERNIE STARES, AMAZED AT THE AMOUNT OF BLOOD IN A HUMAN BODY

demon summoning mistakes were made massacre bloodbath bert ernie grimoire

"Come at me bitch"

"You'll vaccinate my child over my dead body", on hearing this, Dr. Grover challenges the mom with a room temperature IQ to a no holds barred, winner takes all death match after which he triumphantly vaccinates the child over her dead body.

"You'll vaccinate my child over my dead body", on hearing this, Dr. Grover challenges the mom with a room temperature IQ to a no holds barred, winner takes all death match after which he triumphantly vaccinates the child over her dead body.

doctor grover death vaccinates anti-vaccination movement

Look Prairie, me find new Pokemon on Internet!

Prairie Dawn is frustrated that Cookie Monster spoiled Pokemon Sword and Shield By Reposting Leaked Pictures on Tumblr

Prairie Dawn is frustrated that Cookie Monster spoiled Pokemon Sword and Shield By Reposting Leaked Pictures on Tumblr

cookie monster prairie dawn pokemon sword and shield leaks spoilers bertstrips

The Jew Is Loose!

"Oh No, The Jew Got Loose!" Cried Elmo. "But Elmo, that's a Ghost" said the skeleton. "Both don't count as people, What's the Difference?"

"Oh No, The Jew Got Loose!" Cried Elmo. "But Elmo, that's a Ghost" said the skeleton. "Both don't count as people, What's the Difference?"

elmo ghost skeleton elmo says boo bertstrips

Maybe he isn't so pathetic after all

Elmo enjoys nothing more than watching Bert and Ernie's leaked r--- videos on a Friday night.

Elmo enjoys nothing more than watching Bert and Ernie's leaked r--- videos on a Friday night.

bert ernie elmo sesame street

Shitpost

Elmo watches his girlfriend draw a very suggestive fanart of Cookie Monster

Elmo watches his girlfriend draw a very suggestive fanart of Cookie Monster

cookie monster elmo sesame street fanart

hmm

DA BA PO Cookie Monster happily helped preparing the birthday-cake for Ernie's girlfriend until he saw the number of candles on it

DA BA PO Cookie Monster happily helped preparing the birthday-cake for Ernie's girlfriend until he saw the number of candles on it

cookie monster ernie birthday cake

Who wants to hear a funny joke?

Sickened and in a daze from the toxic Chinese body paint, Fozzie wanders onto the interstate and dies in an 11-car pileup

Sickened and in a daze from the toxic Chinese body paint, Fozzie wanders onto the interstate and dies in an 11-car pileup

fozzie bear the muppets death green

Spooky

Kermit shakes hands with a Muppet skeleton.

Kermit shakes hands with a Muppet skeleton.

kermit the frog hand skeleton puppet 4th wall handshake