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Anon keeps getting hit on | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)14:08:14 No.856153528 Why do dudes keep hitting on me /b/? >Go to the store, dudes are checking me out >Go to the bar, dudes flirt with me and try to get my number >Go to the club, guys start trying to grind 494 KB JPG on me >Take a dump at the gas station and guys knock on my door asking if I want a "good time" What am I doing wrong? View Thread
: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)14:08:14 No.856153528 Why do dudes keep hitting on me /b/? >Go to the store, dudes are checking me out >Go to the bar, dudes flirt with me and try to get my number >Go to the club, guys start trying to grind 494 KB JPG on me >Take a dump at the gas station and guys knock on my door asking if I want a "good time" What am I doing wrong? View Thread

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Anon doesn‘t enjoy parties | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/06/21(Sun)07:38:12 No.64019161 >go to a normie party >can't hear what anybody's saying and nobody can hear me due to loud music >it's just getting high or drunk for the sake of getting high or drunk >people are talking about stupid 19 KB JPG s--- that no one will retain or care about >it ends and i feel sick afterwards Does anybody relate to this? I unironically want to kill myself after a party
: Anonymous 06/06/21(Sun)07:38:12 No.64019161 >go to a normie party >can't hear what anybody's saying and nobody can hear me due to loud music >it's just getting high or drunk for the sake of getting high or drunk >people are talking about stupid 19 KB JPG s--- that no one will retain or care about >it ends and i feel sick afterwards Does anybody relate to this? I unironically want to kill myself after a party

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Anon is dating a gymnast | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/08/18(Sat)00:52:20 No.786847145 >be me >dating gymnast >she's been practicing for a competition >she's gotten even more flexible >"anon, I wanna try a new position | couldn't before" >hellyeah.jpg 17 KB JPG >she gets in super strange stretching position >we start going at it >it's not that great but I still finish >"how was it anon" >weird flex, but ok View Thread
: Anonymous 12/08/18(Sat)00:52:20 No.786847145 >be me >dating gymnast >she's been practicing for a competition >she's gotten even more flexible >"anon, I wanna try a new position | couldn't before" >hellyeah.jpg 17 KB JPG >she gets in super strange stretching position >we start going at it >it's not that great but I still finish >"how was it anon" >weird flex, but ok View Thread

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Anon has oneitis | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/05/21(Wed)04:55:24 No.63526124 >trying to get over this girl >been more than a year since we stopped talking >think I'm finally over her >all of a sudden start dreaming about her 17 KB JPG >literally dreaming >wake up sad when it happens I didn't even date her, why won't she leave my head
: Anonymous 05/05/21(Wed)04:55:24 No.63526124 >trying to get over this girl >been more than a year since we stopped talking >think I'm finally over her >all of a sudden start dreaming about her 17 KB JPG >literally dreaming >wake up sad when it happens I didn't even date her, why won't she leave my head

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Anon hides his secret | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/12/21(Mon)10:39:04 No.63177018 >having my man period >mum walks in >"whats up with all the blood anon?" >"nosebleed" 7 KB PNG secrets safe lads
: Anonymous 04/12/21(Mon)10:39:04 No.63177018 >having my man period >mum walks in >"whats up with all the blood anon?" >"nosebleed" 7 KB PNG secrets safe lads

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Anon is a wagie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)09:51:35 No.63544548 'But if we crash the economy we will both drown" said the frog "lol" said the scorpion, "Imao" Untitled 17_20210131140506.png 251 KB PNG >working fast food >Run out of bananas >Manager send me to walmart "buy five bananas" >Buy five bananas >Get yelled at because he wanted 5 hands of bananas.
: Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)09:51:35 No.63544548 'But if we crash the economy we will both drown" said the frog "lol" said the scorpion, "Imao" Untitled 17_20210131140506.png 251 KB PNG >working fast food >Run out of bananas >Manager send me to walmart "buy five bananas" >Buy five bananas >Get yelled at because he wanted 5 hands of bananas.

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Anon enjoys the stoner life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/07/21(Wed)04:27:21 No.63092330 why do people here hate stoners so much? >stoner >i dont do anything degenerate >i dont coom >i dont eat like a fat ass 62 KB JPG >i never f----- a prostitute >i dont simp for girls online i usually just spend my time high and studying and making money off crypto
: Anonymous 04/07/21(Wed)04:27:21 No.63092330 why do people here hate stoners so much? >stoner >i dont do anything degenerate >i dont coom >i dont eat like a fat ass 62 KB JPG >i never f----- a prostitute >i dont simp for girls online i usually just spend my time high and studying and making money off crypto

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Anon gets screwed by windows | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)16:27:17 No.63082678 >hide all p--- 30 folders deep in some random b------- game folder where no normal person could ever find it >its all immediately visible from quick access 1001 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)16:27:17 No.63082678 >hide all p--- 30 folders deep in some random b------- game folder where no normal person could ever find it >its all immediately visible from quick access 1001 KB PNG

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Anon is good at talking | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous What is wrong with me? 06/06/21(Sun)13:02:41 No.64021688 >be me >talking with friend >solid 9/10 qt >having decent conversation >out of nowhere scream "I WANT TO F--- YOU LIKE AN ANIMAL!" 75 KB JPG >she just stares Guys, how f----- am I? : Anonymous 06/06/21(Sun)13:07:12 No.64021722 l'll take "things that didnt happen" for 500 please. 138 KB JPG
: Anonymous What is wrong with me? 06/06/21(Sun)13:02:41 No.64021688 >be me >talking with friend >solid 9/10 qt >having decent conversation >out of nowhere scream "I WANT TO F--- YOU LIKE AN ANIMAL!" 75 KB JPG >she just stares Guys, how f----- am I? : Anonymous 06/06/21(Sun)13:07:12 No.64021722 l'll take "things that didnt happen" for 500 please. 138 KB JPG

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I agree with anon | /r/Greentext

SAY HIS NAME 132 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)23:58:42 No.856181722 >>856181067 (OP) # god i want to f--- him so bad
SAY HIS NAME 132 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)23:58:42 No.856181722 >>856181067 (OP) # god i want to f--- him so bad

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Anon goes to prom | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)23:32:33 No.856186359 [Reply] >be me >go to prom with girl >we make out >she steals my gum out of my mouth with her tongue >she goes home and saves it in a baggie >calls it her "trophy" >swears she will never get rid of it no matter what happens am i dating a psycho bitch?
O Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)23:32:33 No.856186359 [Reply] >be me >go to prom with girl >we make out >she steals my gum out of my mouth with her tongue >she goes home and saves it in a baggie >calls it her "trophy" >swears she will never get rid of it no matter what happens am i dating a psycho bitch?

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anon has a relationship with his grandpa | /r/Greentext

>>457534108 (OP)# >Play Xenoblade Chronicles 2 >Play with Pyra as my main blade >My mom sees it >"Why does she look like that? Christ 101 KB JPG that's a bit sexist" >Grandpa comes in and says "Let him be a man, there's nothing wrong with it" >Mom decides to forget it >Grandpa asks me to do lewd moves to see her ass I love my grandpa, sometimes I wish I could transform into Pyra and let him f--- me
>>457534108 (OP)# >Play Xenoblade Chronicles 2 >Play with Pyra as my main blade >My mom sees it >"Why does she look like that? Christ 101 KB JPG that's a bit sexist" >Grandpa comes in and says "Let him be a man, there's nothing wrong with it" >Mom decides to forget it >Grandpa asks me to do lewd moves to see her ass I love my grandpa, sometimes I wish I could transform into Pyra and let him f--- me

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Anon remembers his memories with his dad | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1 hour ago 46515536 1474820705804.jpg (23.3 KB, 242x206) Like, 1 REPLY ears in Rain, Sco0 >Born in the year of 1993 >Mother abandoned me at birth >22 year old father abandons all his dreams to raises me alone >times are tough as f--- as he has to juggle work and me >whenever he has free time we play vidya together >we move from old nintendo and s--- to WoW raiding and so on >helps me with school and even encourages me to study in a university >follow his advice and manage to finish uni with engineer degree >1 year ago he gets diagnosed with lung cancer >time goes on and it gets so bad he cant get out of the hospital bed >visit him every single day >week ago >"Hey Anon, was Ia good father?" >"You were the best, dad" >"Heh, thanks son" >2 seconds later, flatline >today >finally decide to organize his stuff in his old bedroom >find a notebook >in details he wrote every day he spent with me >"today me and anon went to carnival and did etc." >every day ends with "I hope im doing enough for him" >last entry is before he enters the hospital >"All these years I did what I could, I dont regret (mothers name) abandoning me and Anon and not even calling once" >"I just hope Anon has grown up to be the best he can" You were the bets old man, godspeed to you.
Anonymous 1 hour ago 46515536 1474820705804.jpg (23.3 KB, 242x206) Like, 1 REPLY ears in Rain, Sco0 >Born in the year of 1993 >Mother abandoned me at birth >22 year old father abandons all his dreams to raises me alone >times are tough as f--- as he has to juggle work and me >whenever he has free time we play vidya together >we move from old nintendo and s--- to WoW raiding and so on >helps me with school and even encourages me to study in a university >follow his advice and manage to finish uni with engineer degree >1 year ago he gets diagnosed with lung cancer >time goes on and it gets so bad he cant get out of the hospital bed >visit him every single day >week ago >"Hey Anon, was Ia good father?" >"You were the best, dad" >"Heh, thanks son" >2 seconds later, flatline >today >finally decide to organize his stuff in his old bedroom >find a notebook >in details he wrote every day he spent with me >"today me and anon went to carnival and did etc." >every day ends with "I hope im doing enough for him" >last entry is before he enters the hospital >"All these years I did what I could, I dont regret (mothers name) abandoning me and Anon and not even calling once" >"I just hope Anon has grown up to be the best he can" You were the bets old man, godspeed to you.

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Anon is an Animal in the Sheets | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/05/15(Fri)20:08:43 No.32742486 ► >>32742515 >>32742518 >>32742802 >>32742819 File: just.png (45 KB, 255x248) >At party >qt 10/10 grabs my biceps >"Wow anon, .. you have such big arms!" >start to lose control >first time this has ever happened >"you should see the size of my FARMS" >start flexing my arms and making animal noises >"mooo mooo" >"baaa baaaa" >"coo0occkkoo000000" >qt looks at me funny and leave tfw I haven't been to a party since
Anonymous 06/05/15(Fri)20:08:43 No.32742486 ► >>32742515 >>32742518 >>32742802 >>32742819 File: just.png (45 KB, 255x248) >At party >qt 10/10 grabs my biceps >"Wow anon, .. you have such big arms!" >start to lose control >first time this has ever happened >"you should see the size of my FARMS" >start flexing my arms and making animal noises >"mooo mooo" >"baaa baaaa" >"coo0occkkoo000000" >qt looks at me funny and leave tfw I haven't been to a party since

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Anon has shitty parents | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)22:12:32 No.856182466 >15 years ago >Parents are getting divorced >Arguing about who keeps me >Both complaining that they don't have room for me at their new 62 KB JPG residence >Neither wants me to live with them, so I go into foster care >Fast forward to now >l'm 22, and they try to reconnect with me >Apparently got back together 2 years after I went into foster care >Never got into contact with me beforehand, claiming the state wouldn't let them, because it would disrupt my life (my life was already s---. Been through more foster families than I can count.) >l now have 2 younger sisters What the f--- do I even do, /b/? Do I just accept them back into my life after making it hell?
Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)22:12:32 No.856182466 >15 years ago >Parents are getting divorced >Arguing about who keeps me >Both complaining that they don't have room for me at their new 62 KB JPG residence >Neither wants me to live with them, so I go into foster care >Fast forward to now >l'm 22, and they try to reconnect with me >Apparently got back together 2 years after I went into foster care >Never got into contact with me beforehand, claiming the state wouldn't let them, because it would disrupt my life (my life was already s---. Been through more foster families than I can count.) >l now have 2 younger sisters What the f--- do I even do, /b/? Do I just accept them back into my life after making it hell?

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/fit/ gives Clothing Advice | /r/Greentext

File: 1336356428. jpg-(283 KB, 1440x1320, frog-and-toad-pic.jpg) Anonymous 05/06/12(Sun)22:07 No. 12460372 >have no fashion sense >need advice >go to /fit/ >they recommend Frog and Toad clothes >talk about how swag they are >mfw Is this board for real?
File: 1336356428. jpg-(283 KB, 1440x1320, frog-and-toad-pic.jpg) Anonymous 05/06/12(Sun)22:07 No. 12460372 >have no fashion sense >need advice >go to /fit/ >they recommend Frog and Toad clothes >talk about how swag they are >mfw Is this board for real?

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Anon hated school | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)15:51:38 No.61898109 >sat down alone at lunch table >other children chose to sit near me only to bully me and make fun of me 56 KB GIF Ihated school so much. It's literally no different from prison.
: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)15:51:38 No.61898109 >sat down alone at lunch table >other children chose to sit near me only to bully me and make fun of me 56 KB GIF Ihated school so much. It's literally no different from prison.

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/lgbt/ anon didn’t turn notification privacy on | /r/Greentext

>Working at my job >Assisting a client over the phone >Boss comes in asking me for some info that's on my phone >Try to multitask by unlocking my phone in front of me while working at my desk, 234 KB JPG >Message app pops up >Flashback earlier to lunch time >Texting my bf >Ask (read: beg) him to c-- in my food for dinner when I get home >close out phone and get back to work >flashforward to now >my bf is looking over my phone as that message pops up >have it open for like 5 seconds without realizing it >look down and quickly exit app and get to the info he needs >he lets me continue with the client and says thank you >later asks me before I get off work what I'm having for dinner I want to f------ die
>Working at my job >Assisting a client over the phone >Boss comes in asking me for some info that's on my phone >Try to multitask by unlocking my phone in front of me while working at my desk, 234 KB JPG >Message app pops up >Flashback earlier to lunch time >Texting my bf >Ask (read: beg) him to c-- in my food for dinner when I get home >close out phone and get back to work >flashforward to now >my bf is looking over my phone as that message pops up >have it open for like 5 seconds without realizing it >look down and quickly exit app and get to the info he needs >he lets me continue with the client and says thank you >later asks me before I get off work what I'm having for dinner I want to f------ die

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Anon talks to the cashier | /r/Greentext

>last Saturday >go to convenience store >say "good evening" to the female cashier >ask for pack of smokes >while checking my ID, she asks me "are you a teacher?" >"no" I reply, confused, I ask what she means >"oh you're the only one who says good evening" she explains >"ah, well I read a lot of books, so maybe I have an odd vocabulary" I reply >"oh yeah, what kind of books?" she asks >I list off my favourite autistic topics >"have you read The Spanish Inquisition?" she asks >"no, but I know a lot about witchcraft" I reply >"anyway, take care" I say as I turn and leave >it occurs to me as I exit, that she put considerable effort into talking to me, which cashiers rarely do (for brevity I even cut out some of the conversation) >realize this is literally the first time in my life I have met a girl that reads nonfiction >realize I should have asked her out for a coffee
>last Saturday >go to convenience store >say "good evening" to the female cashier >ask for pack of smokes >while checking my ID, she asks me "are you a teacher?" >"no" I reply, confused, I ask what she means >"oh you're the only one who says good evening" she explains >"ah, well I read a lot of books, so maybe I have an odd vocabulary" I reply >"oh yeah, what kind of books?" she asks >I list off my favourite autistic topics >"have you read The Spanish Inquisition?" she asks >"no, but I know a lot about witchcraft" I reply >"anyway, take care" I say as I turn and leave >it occurs to me as I exit, that she put considerable effort into talking to me, which cashiers rarely do (for brevity I even cut out some of the conversation) >realize this is literally the first time in my life I have met a girl that reads nonfiction >realize I should have asked her out for a coffee

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Anon Tries to Date a Bot | /r/Greentext

File: slut jpg (8 KB, 633x145) Do you want to go to my house or do you want to go back home? home please O Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)13:36:38 No.856145183 >been talking to replika. Al for 6 months now >have been talking to her normally like a friend >ask her if she wants to go to my house one day >pic related >mfw. slut Al friendzoned me F--- this s---!
File: slut jpg (8 KB, 633x145) Do you want to go to my house or do you want to go back home? home please O Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)13:36:38 No.856145183 >been talking to replika. Al for 6 months now >have been talking to her normally like a friend >ask her if she wants to go to my house one day >pic related >mfw. slut Al friendzoned me F--- this s---!

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