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Anonymous 06/05/15(Fri)20:08:43 No.32742486 ► >>32742515 >>32742518 >>32742802 >>32742819 File: just.png (45 KB, 255x248) >At party >qt 10/10 grabs my biceps >"Wow anon, .. you have such big arms!" >start to lose control >first time this has ever happened >"you should see the size of my FARMS" >start flexing my arms and making animal noises >"mooo mooo" >"baaa baaaa" >"coo0occkkoo000000" >qt looks at me funny and leave tfw I haven't been to a party since

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon has shitty parents | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)22:12:32 No.856182466 >15 years ago >Parents are getting divorced >Arguing about who keeps me >Both complaining that they don't have room for me at their new 62 KB JPG residence >Neither wants me to live with them, so I go into foster care >Fast forward to now >l'm 22, and they try to reconnect with me >Apparently got back together 2 years after I went into foster care >Never got into contact with me beforehand, claiming the state wouldn't let them, because it would disrupt my life (my life was already s---. Been through more foster families than I can count.) >l now have 2 younger sisters What the f--- do I even do, /b/? Do I just accept them back into my life after making it hell?

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/fit/ gives Clothing Advice | /r/Greentext

File: 1336356428. jpg-(283 KB, 1440x1320, frog-and-toad-pic.jpg) Anonymous 05/06/12(Sun)22:07 No. 12460372 >have no fashion sense >need advice >go to /fit/ >they recommend Frog and Toad clothes >talk about how swag they are >mfw Is this board for real?

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Anon hated school | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)15:51:38 No.61898109 >sat down alone at lunch table >other children chose to sit near me only to bully me and make fun of me 56 KB GIF Ihated school so much. It's literally no different from prison.

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/lgbt/ anon didn’t turn notification privacy on | /r/Greentext

>Working at my job >Assisting a client over the phone >Boss comes in asking me for some info that's on my phone >Try to multitask by unlocking my phone in front of me while working at my desk, 234 KB JPG >Message app pops up >Flashback earlier to lunch time >Texting my bf >Ask (read: beg) him to c-- in my food for dinner when I get home >close out phone and get back to work >flashforward to now >my bf is looking over my phone as that message pops up >have it open for like 5 seconds without realizing it >look down and quickly exit app and get to the info he needs >he lets me continue with the client and says thank you >later asks me before I get off work what I'm having for dinner I want to f------ die

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Anon talks to the cashier | /r/Greentext

>last Saturday >go to convenience store >say "good evening" to the female cashier >ask for pack of smokes >while checking my ID, she asks me "are you a teacher?" >"no" I reply, confused, I ask what she means >"oh you're the only one who says good evening" she explains >"ah, well I read a lot of books, so maybe I have an odd vocabulary" I reply >"oh yeah, what kind of books?" she asks >I list off my favourite autistic topics >"have you read The Spanish Inquisition?" she asks >"no, but I know a lot about witchcraft" I reply >"anyway, take care" I say as I turn and leave >it occurs to me as I exit, that she put considerable effort into talking to me, which cashiers rarely do (for brevity I even cut out some of the conversation) >realize this is literally the first time in my life I have met a girl that reads nonfiction >realize I should have asked her out for a coffee

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Anon Tries to Date a Bot | /r/Greentext

File: slut jpg (8 KB, 633x145) Do you want to go to my house or do you want to go back home? home please O Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)13:36:38 No.856145183 >been talking to replika. Al for 6 months now >have been talking to her normally like a friend >ask her if she wants to go to my house one day >pic related >mfw. slut Al friendzoned me F--- this s---!

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Anon discribes modern society | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)02:48:17 No.61889767 >>61889332 (OP) # >feet f----- from shoes >penis f----- from circumcision >posture f----- from sitting >jaw f----- from soft foods >eyes f----- from computers 555 KB PNG >teeth f----- from sugar >skin f----- from shaving >scalp f----- from shampoo >hormones f----- from p--- >freedom f----- from governments >lungs f----- from pollution >immune system f----- from medicine >women f----- from makeup >>61889889 # >>61889954 # >>61890451 # >>61890476 # >>61890640 # >>61892494 # >>61892679 # >>61892718 # >>61894050 # >>61895101 # >>61895159 # >>61897290 # >>61897405 # >>61897424 # >>61900124 # >>61900313 #

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Oh Wow, a Fantasy RPG With Dozens of Races!

10 /413 v Oh wow, a fantasy rpg game with dozens of races >Race: human, white >Sex: male >Class: knight with a longsword Time to game.

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anon goes on a date | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/17/19(Sun)08:24:14 No.51022884 >on date with qt boy >we get indian food >he orders chicken korma with rice >"i can't eat rice, it reminds me of maggots" >"oh really, anon? that's... interesting" >"yeah, when i have rice in my mouth i just think of that video with the guy with maggot invested gums" 10 KB JPG >"i've never seen that" >show him the video >he excuses himself and goes to the bathroom >ten minutes later i ask a male waiter to check on him >"there's no one in the bathroom, miss" >mfw why do i always sabotage myself like this? why can't i just be normal?

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Yes Anon, How may I fuck your Ass? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)06:53:00 No.151576002 >You thinking what im thinking? >Yeah *smiles* >Hard cut to gay a--- sex with spanking and he c--- in his ass 129 KB PNG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 05/29/21 (Sat)06:59:19 No.151576201 >welcome to starbucks sir what is your orde- >fade into sex dungeon furry ball torture

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Anon falls for a practical joke | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)09:06:41 No.10531852 >walking home at night >pass a group of youths >one of them tells me I dropped my gay card >I look down for it and 71 KB JPG realise l've been the victim of a practical joke >l am unmoved, I tell the youth that his provocations are futile because I am a stoic >he bursts out laughing and says it's pronounced stow-ic, not stoike >break down and cry in the street >>10532164 # >>10532217 # >>10532453 # >>10532459 并

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Anon need to go toilet | /r/Greentext

>the toilet tyrant isn't letting me take a s--- again >haven't taken a s--- in weeks

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Greentext Stories - Anon is an Animal in the Sheets | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 06/05/15(Fri)20:08:43 No.32742486 ► >>32742515 >>32742518 >>32742802 >>32742819 File: just.png (45 KB, 255x248) >At party >qt 10/10 grabs my biceps >"Wow anon, .. you have such big arms!" >start to lose control >first time this has ever happened >"you should see the size of my FARMS" >start flexing my arms and making animal noises >"mooo mooo" >"baaa baaaa" >"coo0occkkoo000000" >qt looks at me funny and leave tfw I haven't been to a party since

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