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thread File :1267653199751 ipg-(49 KB, 374x357, you-gonna-get-r----.jpg) Anonymous 03/03/10(Wed) 16:53: 1 No.7743764 The awkwardest thing that ITT happened today, presented by greentext. Gaze aimlessly on train Prealize you're looking at a hard-gay black man >look away look at him again >he nods arrive at your stop, which is coincidentally his stop miss your stop
thread File :1267653199751 ipg-(49 KB, 374x357, you-gonna-get-r----.jpg) Anonymous 03/03/10(Wed) 16:53: 1 No.7743764 The awkwardest thing that ITT happened today, presented by greentext. Gaze aimlessly on train Prealize you're looking at a hard-gay black man >look away look at him again >he nods arrive at your stop, which is coincidentally his stop miss your stop

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gay stop bus greentext black man akward

File: 1346759503879.ipg-(15 KB, 316x237, .jpg) Anonymous (ID: ip+zqffK) 09/04/12(Tue)07:51:43 No.423172671 > Be American > Take first ever trip overseas to Australia Still too early to check in at hotel, so decide to go to airport bar >Bar is surprisingly ful > Not > Beer, beer everywhere > Large taps with beer flowing freely, men collecting it with giant glasses > I knew Australians liked beer but Jesus... > All of a sudden, perhaps unsurprisingly, a big guy in khakis pukes violently all over the bar > His friend, who was laughing, quickly stops laughing and starts dry-heaving > ohgodno.jpg ice everyone is drinking beer AUSTRALIA > The second guy inevitably vomits, which causes the guy next to him to start vomiting. The chain reaction eventually effects most of the guys in the bar until all you can hear is a cacophony of heaving coughing, spluttering and splashing > I manage to drag myself away from the scene and decide to catch a cab to my hotel > Get out the front and it is pouring with rain > Thunder cracks overhead and I almost lose my s--- >Cab pulls up > I lean in the window > "Take me downtown? > He looks at me blankly > Ask him politely if he speaks my language > He just smiles and gi > And he says > "I come from a land down under, where the beer does flow and men chunder, can't you hear can't you hear that thunder? You better run, you better take cover!" and its some Indian guy ves me a Vegemite Sandwich
File: 1346759503879.ipg-(15 KB, 316x237, .jpg) Anonymous (ID: ip+zqffK) 09/04/12(Tue)07:51:43 No.423172671 > Be American > Take first ever trip overseas to Australia Still too early to check in at hotel, so decide to go to airport bar >Bar is surprisingly ful > Not > Beer, beer everywhere > Large taps with beer flowing freely, men collecting it with giant glasses > I knew Australians liked beer but Jesus... > All of a sudden, perhaps unsurprisingly, a big guy in khakis pukes violently all over the bar > His friend, who was laughing, quickly stops laughing and starts dry-heaving > ohgodno.jpg ice everyone is drinking beer AUSTRALIA > The second guy inevitably vomits, which causes the guy next to him to start vomiting. The chain reaction eventually effects most of the guys in the bar until all you can hear is a cacophony of heaving coughing, spluttering and splashing > I manage to drag myself away from the scene and decide to catch a cab to my hotel > Get out the front and it is pouring with rain > Thunder cracks overhead and I almost lose my s--- >Cab pulls up > I lean in the window > "Take me downtown? > He looks at me blankly > Ask him politely if he speaks my language > He just smiles and gi > And he says > "I come from a land down under, where the beer does flow and men chunder, can't you hear can't you hear that thunder? You better run, you better take cover!" and its some Indian guy ves me a Vegemite Sandwich

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australia

File: 1371922563634.ipg-(769 KB, 2849x3474, Theodore_Roosevelt laughing.jpg) Anonymous (ID: Q6RIFYsi) 06/22/13(Sat)13:36:03 No.488565345 Replies: 2488565738 >Be me >Be 16 >New school, introduced to class >Meet guy who is an a------, let's call him Shitgut >Shitgut tries to start bullying me >Be alpha and resist >Dont make many friends, don't need them >Notice Shitgut bullies other kids >Decide to f--- him up >Figure where his locker is >Wait until school is over, follow him home from a safe distance, unseen >Mark down where he lives, GTFO >Find out he does hockey, figure out where his ice rink is, and what time he trains >Spend six months practically stalking that f---, making sure I don't get caught >Map out where he is at any time, at all times >Then proceed to phase two, buy a pineapple On a day I get off school earlier than he does, bike to his house and leave the pineapple at the door >His parents ain't home for hours, seen by nobody >He tells people about the pineapple tomorrow, nobody cares >Two weeks later, sneak a pineapple at the ice rink, in the men's dressing room >People think he's making it up >Start buying a pineapple on a regular basis, always have it ready when opportunity strikes >Hallway empty, pick his locker and leave a pineapple >His motorbike is unwatched, leave a pineapple >He doesn't mention the pineapples to anyone anymore >Figure out where they keep his home's spare key >Skip school, sneak into his home while his parents work >Leave a pineapple on his bed >Hear he's failing classes >His parents put up a security camera, I figure the blind spot and dodge that s--- >Send him a f------ pineapple for christmas through the mail from a fake address >He doesn't show up to school every day anymore >Don't even think about why I do it anymore, it's just for s---- and giggles now >Bombard that f--- with random pineapples every few weeks for two f------ years >School year ends, finish school Go to college like a boss Come back home for the holidays >Hear someone from my old school had had a panic attac >It's Shitgut >Someone had left a f------ pineapple on the beer shelf k at the grocery store
File: 1371922563634.ipg-(769 KB, 2849x3474, Theodore_Roosevelt laughing.jpg) Anonymous (ID: Q6RIFYsi) 06/22/13(Sat)13:36:03 No.488565345 Replies: 2488565738 >Be me >Be 16 >New school, introduced to class >Meet guy who is an a------, let's call him Shitgut >Shitgut tries to start bullying me >Be alpha and resist >Dont make many friends, don't need them >Notice Shitgut bullies other kids >Decide to f--- him up >Figure where his locker is >Wait until school is over, follow him home from a safe distance, unseen >Mark down where he lives, GTFO >Find out he does hockey, figure out where his ice rink is, and what time he trains >Spend six months practically stalking that f---, making sure I don't get caught >Map out where he is at any time, at all times >Then proceed to phase two, buy a pineapple On a day I get off school earlier than he does, bike to his house and leave the pineapple at the door >His parents ain't home for hours, seen by nobody >He tells people about the pineapple tomorrow, nobody cares >Two weeks later, sneak a pineapple at the ice rink, in the men's dressing room >People think he's making it up >Start buying a pineapple on a regular basis, always have it ready when opportunity strikes >Hallway empty, pick his locker and leave a pineapple >His motorbike is unwatched, leave a pineapple >He doesn't mention the pineapples to anyone anymore >Figure out where they keep his home's spare key >Skip school, sneak into his home while his parents work >Leave a pineapple on his bed >Hear he's failing classes >His parents put up a security camera, I figure the blind spot and dodge that s--- >Send him a f------ pineapple for christmas through the mail from a fake address >He doesn't show up to school every day anymore >Don't even think about why I do it anymore, it's just for s---- and giggles now >Bombard that f--- with random pineapples every few weeks for two f------ years >School year ends, finish school Go to college like a boss Come back home for the holidays >Hear someone from my old school had had a panic attac >It's Shitgut >Someone had left a f------ pineapple on the beer shelf k at the grocery store

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4chan teddy roosevelt bully pineapple

■ Anonymous f 1107/13(Thu)22:40:55 UTC-5 No.512919342 ! Roples: ASI File: 13839954413 KB 400 215, 1330078366059gn I >Applying for a government job Atter an internew wait a week or so for the background check eSuddenty get a call one day asking ta go to their main office for anotter interview Two guys wearing suits and sunglassas take me into a roam The room looks like an interrogation room; it has asingle celing light. and tas nothing but twn chars, a metal desk, and a camera in the coner One of the guys sits down and the ather stands near the door Sitting guy slams a 44nch thick file on the table ale says that the background check turned up some interesting results The file contains every past He fips through the pages and I see highlighted words and phrases all ower the page lica "faggotucking f----- the k---- are responsible for this n----- software and CP hardcore hental and p--- images Guy sitting down at the table nods to the guy at the door Door guy locks the door Guy sitting down slawly takes off his sunglasses: looks me nght in the eye and and says Care to explain Meet s stare Only one response possible Lurk moar newtag aite rewards me with a single, satisfied nod am hired miw made on 4chan going back tour years ll yourself you mggerfaggot, references to pitated
■ Anonymous f 1107/13(Thu)22:40:55 UTC-5 No.512919342 ! Roples: ASI File: 13839954413 KB 400 215, 1330078366059gn I >Applying for a government job Atter an internew wait a week or so for the background check eSuddenty get a call one day asking ta go to their main office for anotter interview Two guys wearing suits and sunglassas take me into a roam The room looks like an interrogation room; it has asingle celing light. and tas nothing but twn chars, a metal desk, and a camera in the coner One of the guys sits down and the ather stands near the door Sitting guy slams a 44nch thick file on the table ale says that the background check turned up some interesting results The file contains every past He fips through the pages and I see highlighted words and phrases all ower the page lica "faggotucking f----- the k---- are responsible for this n----- software and CP hardcore hental and p--- images Guy sitting down at the table nods to the guy at the door Door guy locks the door Guy sitting down slawly takes off his sunglasses: looks me nght in the eye and and says Care to explain Meet s stare Only one response possible Lurk moar newtag aite rewards me with a single, satisfied nod am hired miw made on 4chan going back tour years ll yourself you mggerfaggot, references to pitated

Greentext Stories
4chan

Anonymous 11/25/13(Mon)19:21:10 No.518004160 >be 15 at home >a few days before my birthday mom uses my pc >sees a lot of .rar files opens one up >winrar appears, saying that the license expires in 40 days >mom takes notice of this >buys me winrar for my birthday Best birthday ever
Anonymous 11/25/13(Mon)19:21:10 No.518004160 >be 15 at home >a few days before my birthday mom uses my pc >sees a lot of .rar files opens one up >winrar appears, saying that the license expires in 40 days >mom takes notice of this >buys me winrar for my birthday Best birthday ever

Greentext Stories
15 birthday winrar 4chan greentext green text > .rar rar files

Did you just?

File: 1372253226932ipg-(7 KB, 205x246, feels.jpg) □ Anonymous (ID: WEQZQGSA) 06/26/13(Wed)09:27:06 No.489373694 Reply] Replies:-2489373859 be me >12 years ago, 7 year old oblivious child Abusive alcoholic mother >Dad was great guy but always at work >He was in the army >Toodumbtoknowanyway.png >Mother forced me to sleep in f------ swinging cot with cat >Cat dragged cutlery and s--- into the cot >Never got good night's sleep >S--- grades even for 2nd grader >Dad didn't care, mother sometimes threw things at me >When dad was home he always spoiled me >Had 8th birthday >Dad told me he was leaving to fight in Afghanistan >He gave me a toy astronaut for my birthday >Left the next day >Demfeels.jpg >Was doing twisted nursery rhymes or some s--- in school >Had to research on little boy blue >Mum had to sign my >Would not sign Whatdoido.jpg >She was all depressed >Found out that my dad was killed in action >Want to die >Get in trouble for no signature at school >Mom f------ beats the s--- out of me >All I have is the astronaut toy my dad gave me >Only link to him >go to bed >Go to cradle/cot thing >And the cat's in the cradle with the silver spoons >Little boy blue and the man on the moon >When you coming home dad I don't know when >But we'll get together then work Anonymous (ID: KmY4SLqu) 06/26/13(Wed)09:28:48 No.489373859 firsties □ Anonymous (ID: QeJA4fu0) 06/26/13(Wed)09:28:57 No.489373875 Did you just
File: 1372253226932ipg-(7 KB, 205x246, feels.jpg) □ Anonymous (ID: WEQZQGSA) 06/26/13(Wed)09:27:06 No.489373694 Reply] Replies:-2489373859 be me >12 years ago, 7 year old oblivious child Abusive alcoholic mother >Dad was great guy but always at work >He was in the army >Toodumbtoknowanyway.png >Mother forced me to sleep in f------ swinging cot with cat >Cat dragged cutlery and s--- into the cot >Never got good night's sleep >S--- grades even for 2nd grader >Dad didn't care, mother sometimes threw things at me >When dad was home he always spoiled me >Had 8th birthday >Dad told me he was leaving to fight in Afghanistan >He gave me a toy astronaut for my birthday >Left the next day >Demfeels.jpg >Was doing twisted nursery rhymes or some s--- in school >Had to research on little boy blue >Mum had to sign my >Would not sign Whatdoido.jpg >She was all depressed >Found out that my dad was killed in action >Want to die >Get in trouble for no signature at school >Mom f------ beats the s--- out of me >All I have is the astronaut toy my dad gave me >Only link to him >go to bed >Go to cradle/cot thing >And the cat's in the cradle with the silver spoons >Little boy blue and the man on the moon >When you coming home dad I don't know when >But we'll get together then work Anonymous (ID: KmY4SLqu) 06/26/13(Wed)09:28:48 No.489373859 firsties □ Anonymous (ID: QeJA4fu0) 06/26/13(Wed)09:28:57 No.489373875 Did you just

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feels

Happy

□ Anonymous (ID: 62HKOZgM) 12/04/12(Tue)02:15 No 441323025 [r] >>44 1324404 >>441324420 224413248 14 >>44 1 325002 2244 1326072 2244 1326553 >be 25 >walking home from class(dental school) >see homeless woman, no older than i was, maybe 23 at the most >don't want to walk around her rudely >say hello >she seemed scared >she was really dirty, but had these eyes like humble pools of water >chat for a little biti grew up hearing that homeless people really appreciate human contact, plus i didn't have any money to give her) find out that she was kicked out by her parents when she was 20, been roaming the streets ever since >almost ashamed to be thinking that she was a 7/10, she didn't even smell as bad as most homeless ive encountered >offer her a shower and meal at my house >still very shy, but she had that humble/thankful look in her eyes >get to my appt, neighbors giving us dirty looks >get inside show her to the bathroom, find some ladies shower stuff that my ex at the time had left >she comes out after about 35 minutes wrapped in a towel, pile of filthy towels and washcloths >no joke, 8/10 without the dirt >give her some of my ex's clothes, nothing fancy, but she looked like a proper lady >made a pasta/red bean salad while she was washing up >we're eating, she bursts into tears >"No on has ever been this nice to me. I can't repay you, but if you want..". >You're a lovely woman, but it wouldnt be right" >look of relief on her face tells me i did the right thing >we finish eating in silence and she asks if i can take her back to her spot >i walk her 'home with a few extra clothes, soaps, blankets, and the leftovers >get to the spot and she tears up and gives me a kiss on the cheek thanks me for everything and says that shell never forget me part 2 coming swalk by her spot most days after class, sometimes ill bring some dinner for us, sometimes i bring lunch before class swe become pretty good friends Pit's not even that weird that it started as an act of charity >do this almost every day for about 2 months sin that time, she got a job at a Panera and supplied some of the meals for us >she takes showers usually once a week at a nearby shelter by this time >pretty much back on her feet, but still homeless si usually get a kiss on the cheek like that first night when i leave invite her back again one night, saying that a change of setting could be nice get to the house and she nearly pounces on me >making out wildly, not even thinking about what she could have >i don't even care at this point, we f----- wildly for a few hours >she legit put all of her gratitude into it >dont see her for about a week after, got checked by doctor, didn't catch anything skeep doing the lunches/dinners soccasional f--- back at my place >she has a pretty good bit of money saved up from work/donations >we decide to make it official part 3 on its way was skeptical when she moved in, i had been robbed by past girlfriends and didn't know what to expect >have great sex first night wake up in this really nice fog, don't want to get out of bed she isn't there >ohfuckimadumbass jpg >smell fire of some kind >run to kitchen, she looks horrified that she burnt the eggs >relieved as f---, i reassured her that it's fine >every day after that we would leave the apartment together sid walk her to work and walk around until lunch, then class >pick her up after work it was a really nice little schedule we had we would both be so tired from work and class that we'd just crash back at our place >this went on for a few months, it was heaven she was extremely loyal too, like how a rescue dog would do anything for its new owner(not the best analogy, but work with me) she picked up some great cooking skills at that panera job, her sandwiches had everything + that love and gratitude >after a few months, i graduated with a D.D.S. and joined a really nice practice >she kept working at panera, bringing in whatever she could, but i was making some serious money now >at this point im 27, she's 26 >happiest people on earth sin that year of dating, i never found her sleeping around, stealing, she was off all her drugs >decided i found the right girl 5 years later, Grace and I are happily married and expecting our first son in a few months. Some nights she still cries at how kind I was the first night. But I was the one who was lucky enough to have polished that diamond I found in the gutter
□ Anonymous (ID: 62HKOZgM) 12/04/12(Tue)02:15 No 441323025 [r] >>44 1324404 >>441324420 224413248 14 >>44 1 325002 2244 1326072 2244 1326553 >be 25 >walking home from class(dental school) >see homeless woman, no older than i was, maybe 23 at the most >don't want to walk around her rudely >say hello >she seemed scared >she was really dirty, but had these eyes like humble pools of water >chat for a little biti grew up hearing that homeless people really appreciate human contact, plus i didn't have any money to give her) find out that she was kicked out by her parents when she was 20, been roaming the streets ever since >almost ashamed to be thinking that she was a 7/10, she didn't even smell as bad as most homeless ive encountered >offer her a shower and meal at my house >still very shy, but she had that humble/thankful look in her eyes >get to my appt, neighbors giving us dirty looks >get inside show her to the bathroom, find some ladies shower stuff that my ex at the time had left >she comes out after about 35 minutes wrapped in a towel, pile of filthy towels and washcloths >no joke, 8/10 without the dirt >give her some of my ex's clothes, nothing fancy, but she looked like a proper lady >made a pasta/red bean salad while she was washing up >we're eating, she bursts into tears >"No on has ever been this nice to me. I can't repay you, but if you want..". >You're a lovely woman, but it wouldnt be right" >look of relief on her face tells me i did the right thing >we finish eating in silence and she asks if i can take her back to her spot >i walk her 'home with a few extra clothes, soaps, blankets, and the leftovers >get to the spot and she tears up and gives me a kiss on the cheek thanks me for everything and says that shell never forget me part 2 coming swalk by her spot most days after class, sometimes ill bring some dinner for us, sometimes i bring lunch before class swe become pretty good friends Pit's not even that weird that it started as an act of charity >do this almost every day for about 2 months sin that time, she got a job at a Panera and supplied some of the meals for us >she takes showers usually once a week at a nearby shelter by this time >pretty much back on her feet, but still homeless si usually get a kiss on the cheek like that first night when i leave invite her back again one night, saying that a change of setting could be nice get to the house and she nearly pounces on me >making out wildly, not even thinking about what she could have >i don't even care at this point, we f----- wildly for a few hours >she legit put all of her gratitude into it >dont see her for about a week after, got checked by doctor, didn't catch anything skeep doing the lunches/dinners soccasional f--- back at my place >she has a pretty good bit of money saved up from work/donations >we decide to make it official part 3 on its way was skeptical when she moved in, i had been robbed by past girlfriends and didn't know what to expect >have great sex first night wake up in this really nice fog, don't want to get out of bed she isn't there >ohfuckimadumbass jpg >smell fire of some kind >run to kitchen, she looks horrified that she burnt the eggs >relieved as f---, i reassured her that it's fine >every day after that we would leave the apartment together sid walk her to work and walk around until lunch, then class >pick her up after work it was a really nice little schedule we had we would both be so tired from work and class that we'd just crash back at our place >this went on for a few months, it was heaven she was extremely loyal too, like how a rescue dog would do anything for its new owner(not the best analogy, but work with me) she picked up some great cooking skills at that panera job, her sandwiches had everything + that love and gratitude >after a few months, i graduated with a D.D.S. and joined a really nice practice >she kept working at panera, bringing in whatever she could, but i was making some serious money now >at this point im 27, she's 26 >happiest people on earth sin that year of dating, i never found her sleeping around, stealing, she was off all her drugs >decided i found the right girl 5 years later, Grace and I are happily married and expecting our first son in a few months. Some nights she still cries at how kind I was the first night. But I was the one who was lucky enough to have polished that diamond I found in the gutter

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happy homeless relationship 4chan green text stories

England

□ Anonymous 04/14/12(Sat)18:03 No.136042832 >go to england >head to restaurant for food >watch is set to timezone of hometown >ask someone what time it is >TOYME? WOTS THAT? snotice he doesn't have a watch >no one in england has a watch >big ben starts to chime >everyone stops what they're doing to count the bongs on their fingers >man crashes his car trying to count the bongs >waitress drops my order on the floor to count her fingers >man running down the street: Ol ITS 7 BONG >mfw
□ Anonymous 04/14/12(Sat)18:03 No.136042832 >go to england >head to restaurant for food >watch is set to timezone of hometown >ask someone what time it is >TOYME? WOTS THAT? snotice he doesn't have a watch >no one in england has a watch >big ben starts to chime >everyone stops what they're doing to count the bongs on their fingers >man crashes his car trying to count the bongs >waitress drops my order on the floor to count her fingers >man running down the street: Ol ITS 7 BONG >mfw

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bong london time big ben england

TF2 Greentext

Anonymous 03/19/13(Tue)05:13 No.181622235 Replies: 1816226291816226542181622751181622824181622908181623013181623198181623268 2181623298181623334181623448 181623738 >181623869 >181624049 181624406 File: 1363684381702 ipg-(104 KB, 500x484, sad_frog_2547[1].jpg) >guy in TF2 talking on the mic with a thick arab accent >"You all go now. Go to fight the bad. I stay defend. They no get past. I stay, you go fight.I alone stay for to defend. Take their box. I stay." >someone tells him to shut the f--- up tell them to shut the f--- up and let him talk if he wants (because I think he's funny to listen to) >he adds me every f------ game I play with him he does the exact same s--- >"I am Tank. I wait by helicopter. You kill. I won't let through. You kill. Boomer man, go vomit. I alone guard helicopter. You go. - "You put portal there. Good. I wait. You discover answer. I know answer. Keep portal there. I will put portal when need. Keep putting portal. Good. Do you see? I wait. You put portal. Good just talking non-stop every f------ game we play arab spring happens have no idea where he lives one day he sends me a message >"bad times friend ahead >"maybe no computer" >"maybe no home >"i go away but we are two of soul" will return Last Online: 615 days ago Good luck, you wonderful bastard.
Anonymous 03/19/13(Tue)05:13 No.181622235 Replies: 1816226291816226542181622751181622824181622908181623013181623198181623268 2181623298181623334181623448 181623738 >181623869 >181624049 181624406 File: 1363684381702 ipg-(104 KB, 500x484, sad_frog_2547[1].jpg) >guy in TF2 talking on the mic with a thick arab accent >"You all go now. Go to fight the bad. I stay defend. They no get past. I stay, you go fight.I alone stay for to defend. Take their box. I stay." >someone tells him to shut the f--- up tell them to shut the f--- up and let him talk if he wants (because I think he's funny to listen to) >he adds me every f------ game I play with him he does the exact same s--- >"I am Tank. I wait by helicopter. You kill. I won't let through. You kill. Boomer man, go vomit. I alone guard helicopter. You go. - "You put portal there. Good. I wait. You discover answer. I know answer. Keep portal there. I will put portal when need. Keep putting portal. Good. Do you see? I wait. You put portal. Good just talking non-stop every f------ game we play arab spring happens have no idea where he lives one day he sends me a message >"bad times friend ahead >"maybe no computer" >"maybe no home >"i go away but we are two of soul" will return Last Online: 615 days ago Good luck, you wonderful bastard.

Greentext Stories
4chan team fortress 2 arab spring big boss left 4 dead portal

Get a new puppy

(361 KB, 80Ux600, x.jpg) □ Anonymous (ID: 15/9fhec) 03/26/13 (Tue) 19:55:54 No.468 ITT: Dog appreciation sbe 12 >get a golden retriever puppy swon't quit shivering so l just hold him for hours name him Duke" be 16 >go everywhere with this dog >best friend >dad goes through a lot of marriages smarries crazy bitch with a rescued abused pit bul >pit bull is a prick to everyone except crazy bitch >have to keep it locked up sone day out in front of house >crazy f------ pit bull gets out of cage runs at me S---.jpeg f----- knocks me down and sinks his teeth into me >Duke comes from the backyard >knocks pit bull off me >fights it for long enough for me to escape >looking back I can see the pit bull tearing my best friend's throat out >I get away >crazy dog runs down street >don't ever see it again scry at my dead dogs side for a good few hours in front of my house where everyone can see >Duke is buried >crazy bitch blames me for her f------ pit bull >be a week later >hungry >look in the cupboard Wat >all of my baked bean cans are gone turn on the news >Duke is a millionaire >m----------- faked his own death to sell my Bush's Baked Beans recipe
(361 KB, 80Ux600, x.jpg) □ Anonymous (ID: 15/9fhec) 03/26/13 (Tue) 19:55:54 No.468 ITT: Dog appreciation sbe 12 >get a golden retriever puppy swon't quit shivering so l just hold him for hours name him Duke" be 16 >go everywhere with this dog >best friend >dad goes through a lot of marriages smarries crazy bitch with a rescued abused pit bul >pit bull is a prick to everyone except crazy bitch >have to keep it locked up sone day out in front of house >crazy f------ pit bull gets out of cage runs at me S---.jpeg f----- knocks me down and sinks his teeth into me >Duke comes from the backyard >knocks pit bull off me >fights it for long enough for me to escape >looking back I can see the pit bull tearing my best friend's throat out >I get away >crazy dog runs down street >don't ever see it again scry at my dead dogs side for a good few hours in front of my house where everyone can see >Duke is buried >crazy bitch blames me for her f------ pit bull >be a week later >hungry >look in the cupboard Wat >all of my baked bean cans are gone turn on the news >Duke is a millionaire >m----------- faked his own death to sell my Bush's Baked Beans recipe

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greentext stories dog 4chan bait-and-switch bush's baked beans

Movie Night

P2 Anonymous 10/02/11(Sun)14:37:27 No.356341545 File 1317580647 ipg-(17 KB, 300x338, mfw1.jpg) be 19 >finally ask girl out for first time >go to movies, try to make out with her nope.avi >MFW I had to finish watching Spider-Man 3 by myself □ Anonymous 10/02/11(Sun)14:39:47 No.356341830 File 131758078Z ipg-(181 KB, 3000x2000, 2007_spider_man_3_0026[1].jpg) be 19 >let creepy guy who has a crush on me pay for my movie ticket >go to movies, he tries to make out with nope.avI MFW I get to finish watching Spider-Man 3 by myself
P2 Anonymous 10/02/11(Sun)14:37:27 No.356341545 File 1317580647 ipg-(17 KB, 300x338, mfw1.jpg) be 19 >finally ask girl out for first time >go to movies, try to make out with her nope.avi >MFW I had to finish watching Spider-Man 3 by myself □ Anonymous 10/02/11(Sun)14:39:47 No.356341830 File 131758078Z ipg-(181 KB, 3000x2000, 2007_spider_man_3_0026[1].jpg) be 19 >let creepy guy who has a crush on me pay for my movie ticket >go to movies, he tries to make out with nope.avI MFW I get to finish watching Spider-Man 3 by myself

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spider-man green text

Sad Story

얇 Anonymous 09/09/12(Sun)14:51 No. 14602921 Reples meswomessw7>>14A3202 >>14aasss Friday, about &PM In room, browsing 4chan and plarying Minecraf sDad comes in > Hey buddy, have any plans for the weekend? >"Not really. no >Why don't you go out with some friends? It's a rice night." -Conversation continues for another five minutes >Dad asks about girls and my Triends 기 try to dodge around admeting I have no friends and have no expenence with grls >But he lknows > "Ok buddy, just let me know if you ever want a ride somewhere, or you can bonmow my car any time you want >Pats me on the shoulder and leaves >l get back to Minecraf >After a few minutes, feel thirsty >No drinks in my room >Venture out of my room and go to the kitchen >Hear my father in the living room,crying Look around the comer He's looking through photo albums at pictures of me > Hey Dad >He looks up, trying to hide that he was crying > Tm going out with some fiends, can I still borrow the car? >He smiles the happiest smile I have seen in years >Sure thing buddy >He gets up and hugs me, tears in his eyes >l get dressed, get in the car and leave >I drive to an empty parking lot in an industrial area go to sleep in the back seat Return home the net morning >Pretend I was out with friends all mnight Dad hugs me again 've been doing this almost every weekend for months now
얇 Anonymous 09/09/12(Sun)14:51 No. 14602921 Reples meswomessw7>>14A3202 >>14aasss Friday, about &PM In room, browsing 4chan and plarying Minecraf sDad comes in > Hey buddy, have any plans for the weekend? >"Not really. no >Why don't you go out with some friends? It's a rice night." -Conversation continues for another five minutes >Dad asks about girls and my Triends 기 try to dodge around admeting I have no friends and have no expenence with grls >But he lknows > "Ok buddy, just let me know if you ever want a ride somewhere, or you can bonmow my car any time you want >Pats me on the shoulder and leaves >l get back to Minecraf >After a few minutes, feel thirsty >No drinks in my room >Venture out of my room and go to the kitchen >Hear my father in the living room,crying Look around the comer He's looking through photo albums at pictures of me > Hey Dad >He looks up, trying to hide that he was crying > Tm going out with some fiends, can I still borrow the car? >He smiles the happiest smile I have seen in years >Sure thing buddy >He gets up and hugs me, tears in his eyes >l get dressed, get in the car and leave >I drive to an empty parking lot in an industrial area go to sleep in the back seat Return home the net morning >Pretend I was out with friends all mnight Dad hugs me again 've been doing this almost every weekend for months now

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□ Anonymous 09/13/11(Tue)20:26 No.1 1 01665150 Hide File1315959994.ipg-(9 KB, 251x251, 1315262861686 jpg) >Be about 9-10 years old Little brother is sleeping in his bed (We shared rooms, back in the day) >Think Ird be hilarious to fart on his head >Pull down my pants and lower my ass so close to his face my anus is almost touching his nose Fart o Realize it isnt a fart >Liquid s--- pours out of my ass, onto his face >He wakes up by snorting my liquid s--- up his nose >He vomits EVERYWHERE flee the scene like some scat version of The Phantom ofthe Opera >He runs downstairs crying and gagging >Hide under the bed >Hear mum do a mini scream and ask what the hell happened to him >Still s------- mys elf under the bed, in small squits >mfw mum found me That was a terrible day.
□ Anonymous 09/13/11(Tue)20:26 No.1 1 01665150 Hide File1315959994.ipg-(9 KB, 251x251, 1315262861686 jpg) >Be about 9-10 years old Little brother is sleeping in his bed (We shared rooms, back in the day) >Think Ird be hilarious to fart on his head >Pull down my pants and lower my ass so close to his face my anus is almost touching his nose Fart o Realize it isnt a fart >Liquid s--- pours out of my ass, onto his face >He wakes up by snorting my liquid s--- up his nose >He vomits EVERYWHERE flee the scene like some scat version of The Phantom ofthe Opera >He runs downstairs crying and gagging >Hide under the bed >Hear mum do a mini scream and ask what the hell happened to him >Still s------- mys elf under the bed, in small squits >mfw mum found me That was a terrible day.

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Tourettes Story

File: 1339869116154 ing-(82 KB, 700x700, 84095 jpg) Anonymous (D: L1t8u3HC) 06/16/12(Sat)13:51:56 No.406537884 be 19 >born with severe Tourette's and a major stuttering problem teased all through middle school and high school loner my whole life >drop out of college from depression suicida parents send me to a support group >meet Angela nicest girl i ever met we hit it off immediately we have the same interests she helps me with my handwriting (l use notes to communicate) -start a relationship first kiss lose my virginity to her >she helps me get back into college Slde doesnt suck so bad phelps me to try to get treatment for Tourette's some progress be 21 our second anniversary Phave a fancy dinner stake her back to my place sget on one knee pget the ring out Stry to propose with my own words >All manage is Wi..will. will y.. scan't finish. Start to cry >Angela puts hands on my shoulders Stums my head up >looks me straight in the eye says > Everyone stutters one way or the other so check out my message to you > As a matter of fact, don't let nothing hold you back; if the Scatman can do it, so can you" >burst into tears smy giffriend is Scatman John >bee bap bap ba-dah bo >bap bap ba-dah bo
File: 1339869116154 ing-(82 KB, 700x700, 84095 jpg) Anonymous (D: L1t8u3HC) 06/16/12(Sat)13:51:56 No.406537884 be 19 >born with severe Tourette's and a major stuttering problem teased all through middle school and high school loner my whole life >drop out of college from depression suicida parents send me to a support group >meet Angela nicest girl i ever met we hit it off immediately we have the same interests she helps me with my handwriting (l use notes to communicate) -start a relationship first kiss lose my virginity to her >she helps me get back into college Slde doesnt suck so bad phelps me to try to get treatment for Tourette's some progress be 21 our second anniversary Phave a fancy dinner stake her back to my place sget on one knee pget the ring out Stry to propose with my own words >All manage is Wi..will. will y.. scan't finish. Start to cry >Angela puts hands on my shoulders Stums my head up >looks me straight in the eye says > Everyone stutters one way or the other so check out my message to you > As a matter of fact, don't let nothing hold you back; if the Scatman can do it, so can you" >burst into tears smy giffriend is Scatman John >bee bap bap ba-dah bo >bap bap ba-dah bo

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What a twist

1356769271613.ipg-(42 KB, 1265x1518, 23142134.jpg) Anonymous (ID: H4vkORCg) 12/29/12(Sat)03:21:11 No.446998693 Replies: 446999032446999501446999725 > Having a crush with my own 16 year old younger sister for years > Adorable in every way, feel an extremely strong sexual attraction to her beautiful body > She loves me as a brother and we share secrets, im like her best friend she tells everything to > One day she tells me about this new guy on school she has a huge crush on > It burns me in the inside and a sick feeling overwhelms me > Something about wanting to know keeps me listening > She sounds obsessed and it cracks even deeper with every remark > A couple of weeks later she starts dating the m----------- and I feel extremely depressed > Grow very cold towards her, she doesnt know what's wrong >Avoid her in every way possible all the time, try hard to get past my crazyness for her > Loosing my mind > One night she breaks into my room and sleeps in my bed, I don't notice until morning > I get furious and call her a slut, tell her to get the f--- out > She starts crying and drops down on her knees, begging to forgive her for whatever she did > Her tearing blue eyes make my heart drop and something triggers in me Anonymous (ID: H4vk0RCa) 12/29/12(Sat)03:30:17 No.447000742 Replies: >>447000970 >2447001081 >>447001148 >>447001331 >>447002067 File: 1356769817253.ipg-(60 KB, 600x541, 23214243.jpg) > I slap her in the face as hard as I can and she lays motionless for a moment, weeping > She gets up and walks out the door without saying anything, just sobbing silently > We don't talk for weeks, we barely look at each other anymore > About a month later she keeps dating this new guy who turned to be a complete douchebag > I find out by friends how he is a player" in school scores many girls at the same time > I start thinking she knows, but she's so lonely and desperate she doesn't even care > Feel bad for her, but the pain inside doesn't let me do anything about it Anonymous (ID: H4vkORCg) 12/29/12(Sat)03:33:21 No.447001234 Replies: >447001348447001746447002006447002239 File: 1356770001418.ipg-(17 KB, 320x248, 231421354.jpg) > One night, parents out on a cruise she comes home extremely drunk, practically intoxicated > She starts teasing me in her drunk stupor, calling me a f-- by the fact I broke up with my girlfriend about a year ago (which I did because I was so obsessed with her) > I ignore her completely, just watching the tv in front of me > She starts hitting me softly in the chest, crying and sobbing > I grab her hands and throw her violently > Continue staring at the tv Anonymous (ID: HAvkORCg) 12/29/12(Sat)03:36:37 No.447001792 Replies: >>447001983 File 447002217 40 KB, 1782x1684, 23124345.jpg) > She jsut lays there weeping like a sick puppy > Finally I can't help but turn to her figure and I notice how revealing she was in the floor > Her bra was half down and I could clearly see her pink panties under her skirt > Suddenly I loose it □ Anonymous ID: H4vk0RCg) 12/29/12 Sat 03:43:12 No 44700284 1 Replies: >>447002964 >>447002970 >>447002972 >>447002976 N47003006 >>447003017 >>447003018 >>447 File: 156720592324. 4312Ne had been keeping inside explode File: 1356770592834 jpg-(55 KB, 500x335, umad.jpg) > She barely struggles and I start feeling her, calling her a slut and a w---- > I pat her ass stating how used it probably was > I take out my c--- and forcefully strip her panties > "NOOOr" she yells "please, I'm still a virgin! > I grab her by the hair and drag her across the room > I open the bedroom door > Throw her down on the floor > Everybody walk the dinosaur
1356769271613.ipg-(42 KB, 1265x1518, 23142134.jpg) Anonymous (ID: H4vkORCg) 12/29/12(Sat)03:21:11 No.446998693 Replies: 446999032446999501446999725 > Having a crush with my own 16 year old younger sister for years > Adorable in every way, feel an extremely strong sexual attraction to her beautiful body > She loves me as a brother and we share secrets, im like her best friend she tells everything to > One day she tells me about this new guy on school she has a huge crush on > It burns me in the inside and a sick feeling overwhelms me > Something about wanting to know keeps me listening > She sounds obsessed and it cracks even deeper with every remark > A couple of weeks later she starts dating the m----------- and I feel extremely depressed > Grow very cold towards her, she doesnt know what's wrong >Avoid her in every way possible all the time, try hard to get past my crazyness for her > Loosing my mind > One night she breaks into my room and sleeps in my bed, I don't notice until morning > I get furious and call her a slut, tell her to get the f--- out > She starts crying and drops down on her knees, begging to forgive her for whatever she did > Her tearing blue eyes make my heart drop and something triggers in me Anonymous (ID: H4vk0RCa) 12/29/12(Sat)03:30:17 No.447000742 Replies: >>447000970 >2447001081 >>447001148 >>447001331 >>447002067 File: 1356769817253.ipg-(60 KB, 600x541, 23214243.jpg) > I slap her in the face as hard as I can and she lays motionless for a moment, weeping > She gets up and walks out the door without saying anything, just sobbing silently > We don't talk for weeks, we barely look at each other anymore > About a month later she keeps dating this new guy who turned to be a complete douchebag > I find out by friends how he is a player" in school scores many girls at the same time > I start thinking she knows, but she's so lonely and desperate she doesn't even care > Feel bad for her, but the pain inside doesn't let me do anything about it Anonymous (ID: H4vkORCg) 12/29/12(Sat)03:33:21 No.447001234 Replies: >447001348447001746447002006447002239 File: 1356770001418.ipg-(17 KB, 320x248, 231421354.jpg) > One night, parents out on a cruise she comes home extremely drunk, practically intoxicated > She starts teasing me in her drunk stupor, calling me a f-- by the fact I broke up with my girlfriend about a year ago (which I did because I was so obsessed with her) > I ignore her completely, just watching the tv in front of me > She starts hitting me softly in the chest, crying and sobbing > I grab her hands and throw her violently > Continue staring at the tv Anonymous (ID: HAvkORCg) 12/29/12(Sat)03:36:37 No.447001792 Replies: >>447001983 File 447002217 40 KB, 1782x1684, 23124345.jpg) > She jsut lays there weeping like a sick puppy > Finally I can't help but turn to her figure and I notice how revealing she was in the floor > Her bra was half down and I could clearly see her pink panties under her skirt > Suddenly I loose it □ Anonymous ID: H4vk0RCg) 12/29/12 Sat 03:43:12 No 44700284 1 Replies: >>447002964 >>447002970 >>447002972 >>447002976 N47003006 >>447003017 >>447003018 >>447 File: 156720592324. 4312Ne had been keeping inside explode File: 1356770592834 jpg-(55 KB, 500x335, umad.jpg) > She barely struggles and I start feeling her, calling her a slut and a w---- > I pat her ass stating how used it probably was > I take out my c--- and forcefully strip her panties > "NOOOr" she yells "please, I'm still a virgin! > I grab her by the hair and drag her across the room > I open the bedroom door > Throw her down on the floor > Everybody walk the dinosaur

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ile: 1338947594986.png-(42 KB, 500x461, i_hug_that feel.png) Anonymous (ID: ske2JOUZ) 06/05/12(Tue)21:53:14 No.4044 I KNOW THAT FEEL BRO Be 21 >Girlfriend's 19 >Been dating for months now >This guy named Joe comes out of f------ nowhere into my life He's my new coworker at my company >Find out he has no money, no place of residence >Moved here for the job and can no longer afford his hotel >Decide to open up to him >Keep him in my apartment for weeks >Bro is pretty cool >We play the vidya, drinks beers, watch football >This continues for months >Afterwards, find out girlfriend is pregnant >By all tradition, I have to marry her now >One night, eating out at dinner with wife >Joe stayed late at the office for some overtime pop the question to my wife >She admits she was r---- by Joe and the baby isn't mine >She isn't ready to make a commitment after being violated >Go home in a f------ rage >Throw out all Joe's s--- >Gonna f------ kill Joe when he gets home >Joe gets home about 1 a.m >As soon as he opens the door, I f------ punch him in his bastard face >Eye swells up like a boll of cotton >He swings at me >Dodge and sweep his leg >He falls down >In a giant f------ rage now >Go to my room, grab my handgun out of my drawer >Go back to confront Joe Joe jumps in his car and f------ hightails it out of there haven't seen or heard from him since >On the phone a month later with my brother >He finally asks why I've been so depressed tell him that if it hadn't been for cotton-eye Joe >I'd been married a long time ago >Where did you come from, where did you go >Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe? Anonymous (ID: AZSigadj) 06/05/12(Tue)21:56:57 No.404406442 bump
ile: 1338947594986.png-(42 KB, 500x461, i_hug_that feel.png) Anonymous (ID: ske2JOUZ) 06/05/12(Tue)21:53:14 No.4044 I KNOW THAT FEEL BRO Be 21 >Girlfriend's 19 >Been dating for months now >This guy named Joe comes out of f------ nowhere into my life He's my new coworker at my company >Find out he has no money, no place of residence >Moved here for the job and can no longer afford his hotel >Decide to open up to him >Keep him in my apartment for weeks >Bro is pretty cool >We play the vidya, drinks beers, watch football >This continues for months >Afterwards, find out girlfriend is pregnant >By all tradition, I have to marry her now >One night, eating out at dinner with wife >Joe stayed late at the office for some overtime pop the question to my wife >She admits she was r---- by Joe and the baby isn't mine >She isn't ready to make a commitment after being violated >Go home in a f------ rage >Throw out all Joe's s--- >Gonna f------ kill Joe when he gets home >Joe gets home about 1 a.m >As soon as he opens the door, I f------ punch him in his bastard face >Eye swells up like a boll of cotton >He swings at me >Dodge and sweep his leg >He falls down >In a giant f------ rage now >Go to my room, grab my handgun out of my drawer >Go back to confront Joe Joe jumps in his car and f------ hightails it out of there haven't seen or heard from him since >On the phone a month later with my brother >He finally asks why I've been so depressed tell him that if it hadn't been for cotton-eye Joe >I'd been married a long time ago >Where did you come from, where did you go >Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe? Anonymous (ID: AZSigadj) 06/05/12(Tue)21:56:57 No.404406442 bump

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ile: 1344575534625.ipg-(50 KB, 366x450, 100percentnegro.jpg) Anonymous (ID: pxuDJz59) 08/10/12(Fri)01:12:14 No.417846914 >4 years ago wake up in jail cell with best friend and other prisoners >charged with public intoxication, disturbing the peace, and posession of illegal fireworks friend's on the pay phone with his parents >he's crying like a bitch >big black brutish cellmate walks up behind friend pulls friend's pants down >"time for your buttrape swalk up behind black cellmate ravaging friend's ass >"oh, yeah, well time for YOUR buttrape pull black cellmate's pants down and start f------ his ass >"joke's on you, cracker f-----, I'm lovin' that s--- >feel black cellmate s------- on my d--- as I'm f------ him >suddenly someone else pulls my pants down and f---- my ass before I know it all the cellmates are in one long conga line of buttfucking sfriend's still crying on the pay phone to his parents the whole time >suddenly hear guards shout "what the f---? >slide open the cell doors and start breaking up the conga line of buttfucking riot ensues escape through the open cell doors amidst the mayhem never saw friend again Anonymous (D: D+UgTTww) 08/10/12/Fr)01:13:35 No.417847206 well.... thanks for sharing. i guess
ile: 1344575534625.ipg-(50 KB, 366x450, 100percentnegro.jpg) Anonymous (ID: pxuDJz59) 08/10/12(Fri)01:12:14 No.417846914 >4 years ago wake up in jail cell with best friend and other prisoners >charged with public intoxication, disturbing the peace, and posession of illegal fireworks friend's on the pay phone with his parents >he's crying like a bitch >big black brutish cellmate walks up behind friend pulls friend's pants down >"time for your buttrape swalk up behind black cellmate ravaging friend's ass >"oh, yeah, well time for YOUR buttrape pull black cellmate's pants down and start f------ his ass >"joke's on you, cracker f-----, I'm lovin' that s--- >feel black cellmate s------- on my d--- as I'm f------ him >suddenly someone else pulls my pants down and f---- my ass before I know it all the cellmates are in one long conga line of buttfucking sfriend's still crying on the pay phone to his parents the whole time >suddenly hear guards shout "what the f---? >slide open the cell doors and start breaking up the conga line of buttfucking riot ensues escape through the open cell doors amidst the mayhem never saw friend again Anonymous (D: D+UgTTww) 08/10/12/Fr)01:13:35 No.417847206 well.... thanks for sharing. i guess

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厂Anonynous 01/29/12(Sun09:19 No1271586|3 File13272845761 ipg-( (45 KB, 398x495, 0209_gabe-newell 398.jpg) >E3 2012 >Myamoto, lwata and Reggie are up on the stage announcing Wi U's new name and gving the presentation and such ike >Nearing end of present ation, all guests, games and other things have been shown SSuddenly Reggie says Nintendo have one more thing to show >The lights dim >A rotund man bursts forth from the shadows >lt's Gaben Rolls towards the centre of the stage >Announces that the WiU will have Steamworks "One more thing >3 appears on the screen >Rise and shine, Mr Freeman.. >HL3 announced as launch title for WilU to be packaged along with Dota 2 and CS:GO as part of the Blu Box The crowd go wild >Wexplodes the gaming community soils themselves collectively The golden age of gaming is upon us, where Valve and Nintendo join forces >box and Sony fal completely >PC Gaming is stronger than ever, with its buddy Nintendo releasing games for PC and Wi >Carl Sagan is brought back to life and elected President of the USA >Religion disappears from the face of the Earth peacefully, as people are enlightened >The private space industry takes off and we establish several ONeill space cylinder colonies and moon colonies and start mining Jupiter's moons >Humanity is united under one federal nation, in a fair system with good education, perfect equality of opportunity and political enfranchisement among its citizenry. There is no war >As the ripe age of 75, Gaben sits on his golden throne at the top of the Valive spacetower, and closes his eyes for the last time, uttering his fnal words >"I hope.. it was worth the wait."
厂Anonynous 01/29/12(Sun09:19 No1271586|3 File13272845761 ipg-( (45 KB, 398x495, 0209_gabe-newell 398.jpg) >E3 2012 >Myamoto, lwata and Reggie are up on the stage announcing Wi U's new name and gving the presentation and such ike >Nearing end of present ation, all guests, games and other things have been shown SSuddenly Reggie says Nintendo have one more thing to show >The lights dim >A rotund man bursts forth from the shadows >lt's Gaben Rolls towards the centre of the stage >Announces that the WiU will have Steamworks "One more thing >3 appears on the screen >Rise and shine, Mr Freeman.. >HL3 announced as launch title for WilU to be packaged along with Dota 2 and CS:GO as part of the Blu Box The crowd go wild >Wexplodes the gaming community soils themselves collectively The golden age of gaming is upon us, where Valve and Nintendo join forces >box and Sony fal completely >PC Gaming is stronger than ever, with its buddy Nintendo releasing games for PC and Wi >Carl Sagan is brought back to life and elected President of the USA >Religion disappears from the face of the Earth peacefully, as people are enlightened >The private space industry takes off and we establish several ONeill space cylinder colonies and moon colonies and start mining Jupiter's moons >Humanity is united under one federal nation, in a fair system with good education, perfect equality of opportunity and political enfranchisement among its citizenry. There is no war >As the ripe age of 75, Gaben sits on his golden throne at the top of the Valive spacetower, and closes his eyes for the last time, uttering his fnal words >"I hope.. it was worth the wait."

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Gf is prego

s(1bo kA File: 1352501900004.ipg-(130 KB, 650x813, sads.jpg) Anonymous (ID: Z/jgpDx3) 11/09/12(Fri)17:58:20 No.435969427 Replies: 435971345 4359716352435971949 2435972123 2243597225422435972291 22435972559 435972704 2435973158 224359731592435973326 32435973549435973950 435974179 2435974538 22435974676 22435975137 2435975236 >>435975307 >>435975408 >>435975448 >>435975862-355 5875 43597 35975307-24359 75408 >- 2435975909 2435975973 gf is prego >we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy >i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird f------ chunks coming out, so l turn on the lights >w-- it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit si rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital >she's still bleeding everywhere >by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much more, but all color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent >oh s---, she looks like she's in a vegetative state >storm into to the emergency room, carry her to the nearest doctor and explain everything >he takes one look at her and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do "WHY THE F--- NOT???" >"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce" >mfw
s(1bo kA File: 1352501900004.ipg-(130 KB, 650x813, sads.jpg) Anonymous (ID: Z/jgpDx3) 11/09/12(Fri)17:58:20 No.435969427 Replies: 435971345 4359716352435971949 2435972123 2243597225422435972291 22435972559 435972704 2435973158 224359731592435973326 32435973549435973950 435974179 2435974538 22435974676 22435975137 2435975236 >>435975307 >>435975408 >>435975448 >>435975862-355 5875 43597 35975307-24359 75408 >- 2435975909 2435975973 gf is prego >we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy >i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird f------ chunks coming out, so l turn on the lights >w-- it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit si rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital >she's still bleeding everywhere >by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much more, but all color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent >oh s---, she looks like she's in a vegetative state >storm into to the emergency room, carry her to the nearest doctor and explain everything >he takes one look at her and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do "WHY THE F--- NOT???" >"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce" >mfw

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File 1327933933 jpg-(247 KB, 612x800, 773444_orig jpg) 旧回Anonymous 01/30/12(Mon)09:32:13 No.377740601 >16 years old >At the library alone, as usual >Minding my own business, as usual >Incredibly hot girl comes walking in >Wearing short skirt, datass.jpg >She grabs a book >Starts gracefully walking towards me >She grabs my shoulder >l can't speak >She sits on my lap can't move am in disbelief have the hardest wood ever. >She's not wearing underwear >Rubs up on me until she gets comfortable still can't move. >Realize I'm a chair >Do nothing, because I am a chair.
File 1327933933 jpg-(247 KB, 612x800, 773444_orig jpg) 旧回Anonymous 01/30/12(Mon)09:32:13 No.377740601 >16 years old >At the library alone, as usual >Minding my own business, as usual >Incredibly hot girl comes walking in >Wearing short skirt, datass.jpg >She grabs a book >Starts gracefully walking towards me >She grabs my shoulder >l can't speak >She sits on my lap can't move am in disbelief have the hardest wood ever. >She's not wearing underwear >Rubs up on me until she gets comfortable still can't move. >Realize I'm a chair >Do nothing, because I am a chair.

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