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If you don't teach your child to obey Jesus, the devil will teach them evolution, sexuality psychology, witchcraft de bear-eggs geekandmisand Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time #Team Satan Can satan come teach a class at my school

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I had Satan as a substitute teacher once. It was the best day I had in school.


Uploaded by Solid Snivy Aug 16, 2015 at 09:46PM EDT

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The oldest computer was owned by Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with very limited memory. Just 1 byte and everything crashed!
I'M NOT THE STEP DAD I'M JUST THE DAD THAT STEPPED UP
"David danced before the Lord with all his might" - 2 Samuel 6:14
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Christianity - I had Satan as a substitute teacher once. It was the best day I had in school.

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Astatine, Resident Hijab Enthusiast
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Astatine, Resident Hijab Enthusiast

The Bible has a lot of sexuality, though.

I mean, have you READ Songs of Solomon?

(Also, PSA: shielding your children from even the tiniest slivers of sexuality while refusing to explain any of it to them is no good-- it'll just make them more curious and then once they're 18 they'll probably snap and suck like, a billion dicks.)

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Uploaded Aug 16, 2015 at 09:46PM EDT

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