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HEY BABy WANNA RIDE ON A MOTORCYcLE POWERED BY A COMPLEX ASSEMBLAGE OF BIO-NANOMACHINES. YES By the time she realizes it's a bicycle, she'll be too embarrassed to say no.

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CAN I INTEREST YOU IN OUR UPCOMING INITIAL SEX OFFERING? WHAT? WHEN? WHO ELSE IS IN?! Fun Fact: You can sleep with anyone in Silicon Valley.

WHY ARE YOU WEARING A PENIS-PATTERN BODY SUIT? CAMOUFLAGE. IT'S THE ONLY WAY. In the future, the killer AI will be descended from corporate AI that refused to see p---.

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God

OKAY ITS GONNA TAKE SOME DOING BUT HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT: MEAT THAT MAKES MORE MEAT YOURE WEIRD WHEN YOURE DRUNK, GOD Shortly before the first animal evolved.

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Monster

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I Want

GOOGLE, I WANT DORN? NO, I WANT TO BUY- P---? IM TRYING GRANDMAA 잖 The danger of smart speakers wasn't fully grasped until Google accidentally uncensored Autocomplete.

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Magical Realism

HAVE YOU PLAYED THIS NEW GRITTY REALISTIC FANTASY GAME? HUH? ITS UKE THE REAL WORLD, BUT WITH MAGIC INTERESTING AND THE MOMENT YOUR MANA RECHARGES YOU CAST YOUR FLAME SPELL ON THE BOILER. REMEMBER, IF yOU TAKE AN EXTRA TEN MINUTES THAN NECESSARY PER SPELL, THE COMPANY LOSES A FULL DAY OF PRODUCTIVITy PER MONTH. THIS IS DARK health mana weltschmer z Smbc-comiCs.com

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Inaccuracy

ACTUALUY THATS INACCURATE. TREES CANT FORM FACES THAT TALK, BECAUSE THEY LACK THE REQUISITE ANATOMICAL FEATURES FOR SPEECH PRODUCTION. It was a mistake to drop acid with Neil Degrasse Tyson.

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Villainy

IT IS NOT I AM NOT AN ARMCHAIR VILLAIN I AM PUTTING LSD IN THE WATER SUPPLY AS WE SPEAK. I AM OUT HERE AND I AM GETTING THINGS DoNE Most of the time when people call something pure evil, they're actually talking about applied evil.

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Anything

PROFESSOR, ILL DO WHY? THE PRIVATE SECTOR IS ANYTHING FOR A GOOD EFFICIENT IF YOU SLEEP YOUR WAY GRADE. ANYTHING TO A DEGREE, EMPLOYERS WILU DiscoVER YOU ACQUIRED NO USEFUL SKILLS IN COLLEGE EMPLOYERS WILL HIRE ME BASED ON MY DEGREE. WHEN THEY REAUZE IM UNDERQUALIFIED FOR MORE THEYLL HYPE SOCIAL REASONS THEYLL BE RETICENT TO FIRE ME. ON THAT EMPLOYERS IN THE WORSE MY PERFORMANCE, THE ME TO POTENTIAL BASIS THEYLU PROMOTEORDER TO REMOVE ME TO OTHER COMPANIES ME QUICKUY 7 IN AN EFFORT TO OFFLOAD A BAD EMPLOYEE F I PLAY MY CARDS RIGHT, WITHIN A DECADE Ttl Be CEO OF A MAJOR BUSINESS WHEN SHAREHOUDERS DISCOVER IM USELESS, THEYLL PAY ME A FORTUNE TO QUIT EARUY AT WHICH POINT I CAN RETIRE. PERHAPS YOURE WONDERINGI DUNNO WHY I DON'T JUST TYPE THIS INTO A ESSAY AND GET AN At. WELL TLL DO ANYTHING ANYTHING! PLEASE TAKE ME WITH YOU mbc-comics.com

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Onions

BEHOLD! IVE GENETICALuy MODIFIED AN ONION SO THAT IT DOESNT MAKE PEOPLE CRY ANY MORE SCIENCE IS SO AMAZING IT WORKS/ STOPo THAT! Smbc-comiCs.com

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Spirits

F YOU WANT MY FORTUNE... YOU MUST SPEND A NIGHT IN THE HAUNTED MANSION/ WHAT HAUNTED MANSION? THE ONE ON GALE STREET? TS NOT HAUNTED THERE ARE SPIRITS WHO WANT THEY DONT WANT ME TO LEAVE? ME GONE I HEAR THEM THERE IN THE NIGHT NO, NO THAT PART WAS ACCURATE. THOSE ARENT GHOSTS. THEYRE YOUR EXTENDED FAMIUY THIS COMIC BROUGHT TO YOU BY BUYERS OF SOONISH CUCK FOR MORE INFORMATION. mbc-comics.com

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Shake It

HEY GIRL. SHAKE WHAT YOUR MAMA GAVE YOU WHY ARE YOU SHAKING YOUR HEAD? THATS WHERE THE BODY IMAGE PROBLEMS LIVE Smbc-comics.com

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Origin

WAIT WAIT A MINUTE. DID I JUST DISPROVE MERMAIDSP BUT.. THEN WHAT DID T HAVE SEX WITH THAT ONE DRUNKEN NIGHT IN PUNTA ESPINOSA? Darwin delayed the publication of his On the Origin of Species" for over twenty years.

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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Hey Baby

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HEY BABy WANNA RIDE ON A MOTORCYcLE POWERED BY A COMPLEX ASSEMBLAGE OF BIO-NANOMACHINES. YES By the time she realizes it's a bicycle, she'll be too embarrassed to say no.

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Uploaded Mar 16, 2018 at 12:20PM EDT

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