I just remembered that this is a time-out fight, so, in this reality, Spider-man won the match due to the excessive talking and they could not bring up the "you didn't last the full time" technicality against Peter, so he got the money, was happy, ran onto the thief and actually stopped him this time as he had no grudges held, so his uncle lived as a result. All thanks to gay acceptance.

Good ending unlocked.

The verbosity is part of the joke here, though.