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10 11 Shortly after the pair's quick exodus from of Chernobyl, Russia, these coincidences gained attention from various international law organizations, and CORTEX and BRIO were soon on the international most-wanted list. Hard to catch but easy to follow, the two sought a place where they could hide, away from people. Eventually they took advantage of a shady "land offer" advertisement in a three-line classified in the Australian tabloid Dirt Down Under, and found themselves owners of what anyone civilized would consider the farthest place from humanity. Perfect. Huddled on their new island under an odd stone pillar of unknown origin, CORTEX vowed to get even with mankind once and for all. It wasn't until five years later that he began to see his plans realized... HISTORY: Things might have been different had young NEO CORTEX been born to a household of scientists, philosophers, historians, or scholars. As fate would have it, however, NEO CORTEX was born to a family of unsuccessful traveling clowns... in a gypsy wagon fleeing Peoria, Illinois after a particularly "unsuccessful" show. Two years later, after many a gig with many a troupe, his family was threatened with expulsion from "Smilin' Jimmy's Travelin' Side Show" if they failed to find a new spin on their act. Dragging their young boy from their home/wagon and stripping him of Newton's Principia Mathematica, the CORTEX family made their first successful attempt at humor. The sight of a two-year-old, white faced, red nosed, prematurely balding bundle of misery asking for his "fisics" back in a dreary monotone sent Jimmy into convulsive fits of laughter. He renewed the CORTÉXES, and made NEO the star of the show. The act was soon modified, and a year later it included not only physical abuse by the other clowns, but also "cabbage catchin" (courtesy of Jimmy's free vegetable handouts to the audience) and --- possibly most punishing -- the stage name "Lit'l Idjut." To this day, sight, sound, or mention of clowns propels N. CORTEX into a furious rage. N CORTEX was almost five when the abuse abruptly ended, thanks to a freak fireworks explosion in the main tent during dress rehearsals -- a puzzling occurrence, since Corporal Jimmy's post-war nightmares meant that "Smilin' Jimmy's Travelin' Side Show" never included fireworks in any act. N. CORTEX was free. He enrolled in the local high school at age 6 and excelled academically while floundering socially. Time after time other kids brutally beat him after school as payback for breaking the curve. His infancy, bookish ways, arrogant attitude, and swollen cranium made him the whipping boy of every high school bully, and not a few of his teachers. The only friend he had was the similarly outcast NITRUS BRIO, with whom he often dreamed of revenge. Ironically, just after an especially strong revenge-talking session, Oliver North High and much of the town and local countryside were blown sky high by a sudden malfunction of the school physics department's test nuclear power plant. Luckily for them, N. CORTEX and N. BRIO happened to be on a self- sponsored history field trip in an old test bunker on abandoned G. G. Liddy Marine Munitions Depot Property, just outside of the blast radius. Thus began the search for a place to call home. But everywhere - from the Himalayas to the Congo, from the Antarctic plains to the deserts of the middle east .-- CORTEX and BRIO found themselves ridiculed and ostracized. Remarkably, whenever they left a locale, a mysterious series of violent explosions and catastrophes followed. DR. NEO CORTEX (N. CORTEX)

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Cortex caused the Chernobyl disaster


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I'M GONNA SAY THE N WORD. Stop Neo Cortex in Crash Bandicoot's new adventure. spin, jump and slide your way through dozens of levels.. Universal Interactive NDICOOR WRATH B NINTENDO GAMECUBE
Not really close to the original format, but I feel like this is in spirit of the meme.
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Doctor Neo Cortex - Cortex caused the Chernobyl disaster

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10 11 Shortly after the pair's quick exodus from of Chernobyl, Russia, these coincidences gained attention from various international law organizations, and CORTEX and BRIO were soon on the international most-wanted list. Hard to catch but easy to follow, the two sought a place where they could hide, away from people. Eventually they took advantage of a shady "land offer" advertisement in a three-line classified in the Australian tabloid Dirt Down Under, and found themselves owners of what anyone civilized would consider the farthest place from humanity. Perfect. Huddled on their new island under an odd stone pillar of unknown origin, CORTEX vowed to get even with mankind once and for all. It wasn't until five years later that he began to see his plans realized... HISTORY: Things might have been different had young NEO CORTEX been born to a household of scientists, philosophers, historians, or scholars. As fate would have it, however, NEO CORTEX was born to a family of unsuccessful traveling clowns... in a gypsy wagon fleeing Peoria, Illinois after a particularly "unsuccessful" show. Two years later, after many a gig with many a troupe, his family was threatened with expulsion from "Smilin' Jimmy's Travelin' Side Show" if they failed to find a new spin on their act. Dragging their young boy from their home/wagon and stripping him of Newton's Principia Mathematica, the CORTEX family made their first successful attempt at humor. The sight of a two-year-old, white faced, red nosed, prematurely balding bundle of misery asking for his "fisics" back in a dreary monotone sent Jimmy into convulsive fits of laughter. He renewed the CORTÉXES, and made NEO the star of the show. The act was soon modified, and a year later it included not only physical abuse by the other clowns, but also "cabbage catchin" (courtesy of Jimmy's free vegetable handouts to the audience) and --- possibly most punishing -- the stage name "Lit'l Idjut." To this day, sight, sound, or mention of clowns propels N. CORTEX into a furious rage. N CORTEX was almost five when the abuse abruptly ended, thanks to a freak fireworks explosion in the main tent during dress rehearsals -- a puzzling occurrence, since Corporal Jimmy's post-war nightmares meant that "Smilin' Jimmy's Travelin' Side Show" never included fireworks in any act. N. CORTEX was free. He enrolled in the local high school at age 6 and excelled academically while floundering socially. Time after time other kids brutally beat him after school as payback for breaking the curve. His infancy, bookish ways, arrogant attitude, and swollen cranium made him the whipping boy of every high school bully, and not a few of his teachers. The only friend he had was the similarly outcast NITRUS BRIO, with whom he often dreamed of revenge. Ironically, just after an especially strong revenge-talking session, Oliver North High and much of the town and local countryside were blown sky high by a sudden malfunction of the school physics department's test nuclear power plant. Luckily for them, N. CORTEX and N. BRIO happened to be on a self- sponsored history field trip in an old test bunker on abandoned G. G. Liddy Marine Munitions Depot Property, just outside of the blast radius. Thus began the search for a place to call home. But everywhere - from the Himalayas to the Congo, from the Antarctic plains to the deserts of the middle east .-- CORTEX and BRIO found themselves ridiculed and ostracized. Remarkably, whenever they left a locale, a mysterious series of violent explosions and catastrophes followed. DR. NEO CORTEX (N. CORTEX)

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Uploaded Sep 29, 2020 at 04:28PM EDT

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Doctor Neo Cortex

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dr neo cortex, chernobyl, crash bandicoot

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