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>On April 11, Hauptsturmfuhrer Fritz Klingenberg's instructions were to reconnoiter and establish checkpoints, secure any bridges and roads encountered, then hold for reinforcements. Heavy rains and melting snow had washed away nearly all soft surfaces, and bridges had been destroyed by retreating Yugoslav forces. The main avenues of approach to Belgrade were no longer viable routes, and the tanks would be hard pressed to continue without massive engineering support to clear those areas. After several hours of observing the stricken city from across the Danube River, Klingenberg believed that Belgrade was his for the taking, due to the confusion caused by the bombardments provided his unit arrived in time. He had only 24 hours to submit a report to his command, and a decision had to be made quickly. >Klingenberg saw a chance to probe more deeply into the city's environs when one of his men found an abandoned motorboat tied to a tree along the banks of the swollen Danube. Taking only one sergeant and five privates, he negotiated the treacherous river. The trip was extremely dangerous, the currents raging from the runoff of melting snow in the mountains and from torrential rains. The boat was overloaded, as well. Reaching the far side of the Danube, Klingenberg sent two men back to ferry more troops over before sunset. On the return trip, however the boat struck a submerged obstacle and sank. Klingenberg's 'navy' ceased to exist, leaving the captain and six of his men stranded. They were totally isolated, with limited supplies and ammunition. >The squad advanced along the road and encountered a few British-made vehicles manned by Yugoslav soldiers. They captured two trucks and a bus, along with some 20 enemy soldiers. One of the men on the bus was an inebriated German tourist who had been trapped in Belgrade since the invasion started. The tourist, who spoke Croatian, had been apprehended as a spy by the Yugoslav soldiers and was being taken to be executed. He was still drunk and unaware of his impending fate. When he sobered up, he thought that he was still among his group of partygoers until he was informed of the situation. Klingenberg used him as an interpreter, in which capacity the grateful German was most helpful. >The SS men continued on, using their prisoners and a few captured uniforms to get past several enemy checkpoints. They made good progress the first day without any of the enemy checkpoint guards becoming suspicious. The Germans added the Yugoslav guards to the increasing number of prisoners they were collecting along the way. The population of Belgrade, after several days of bombing, was anticipating a long siege rather than an attack, and the lax security that Klingenberg encountered played directly into his hands. >Upon entering the outskirts of the city, the Germans became involved in a two-hour running firefight. They finally drove their captured vehicles into the city with many wounded prisoners aboard, including the hapless tourist. Miraculously, none of the SS men were wounded in the fight. They ended up in the city center, all alone and surrounded by a wide-eyed, bewildered population. The only SS casualty in Belgrade thus far was a private who had fallen and sprained his wrist. >The Germans were amazed to find that no one attacked them in the city. The civilians went about their daily business as if nothing had happened. Klingenberg ordered Sergeant Hans Hossfelder to raise the German colors, replacing the Yugoslavian national flag with the German ensign shortly after 5 p.m. on April 12. Under Klingenberg's orders, his men began to strut about the city on patrol, giving the inhabitants the unmistakable impression that they were in charge. >The mayor of Belgrade came up to the Germans, complete with his entourage of city officials and in proper ceremonial dress. After asking what was going on, he inquired about the terms of surrender. Klingenberg told the mayor that his was the point team of several SS tank divisions, and if he did not check in with his unit by radio with the information requested, the Luftwaffe would continue their attempts to level the city. He also said that the air attacks would be followed by an artillery barrage and armored and infantry attacks that would spare no one. >The other Germans looked at their leader as if he was mad. Their radio was damaged and could not transmit, only receive; their unit was a considerable distance away; and they were out of ammunition and food. Sergeant Hossfelder later told his captain that he was in the wrong business, adding that the Propaganda Ministry could surely find a use for him. The mayor fell for the ruse, and after an hour-long conversation with Klingenberg, he began the necessary arrangements for the surrender of the city. Then, as if on cue, a group of German aircraft flew over the city on a reconnaissance mission, and Klingenberg took advantage of the moment. He looked up, pointing to the sky, and reminded the mayor that the clock was ticking. Klingenberg gave his word that if all instructions were followed, no further harm would befall the city or its inhabitants. The city officials seemed relieved to hear that. The soldiers and city militia agreed to lay down their arms in exchange for the Germans' ceasing additional attacks. The Yugoslav army stacked its arms in the city square, and Klingenberg had all of the men register with the mayor. Klingenberg then ordered the prisoners to quarter themselves in four of the largest hotels and posted a German guard to each building. The handful of Germans had just captured more than 1,300 troops and a city with a population of over 200,000 without firing. shot. The city had suffered considerable damage, but not enough to prevent the locals from continuing with life and business as usual. Yugaslav soldiers outside the city, unaware of what had happened to their capital, drove into Belgrade only to be ordered by their superiors to lay down their arms, abandon their vehicles and march to the hotels. All the Yugoslavians complied without hesitation. Klingenberg and his men made themselves comfortable in the city's finest hotel, making fake radio transmissions to reinforce the charade. They stockpiled bottles of wine and weapons, and two of the men disappeared with a couple of local women. Meanwhile, Klingenberg consolidated his position, knowing that things could still go wrong. If the main force did not arrive soon, the game was up. He had his men recruit locals to help procure every map, police record and tax record in the city. AL >The chief of police was ordered to provide a list of all criminals in the city, stating their crimes, age and other pertinent information. Women with nursing skills were to report for duty immediately, and all doctors were called in as well. Every liter of gasoline was accounted for, and oil, medical supplies and other necessities were placed in special holding facilities. The hospital was to be neutral ground, and all health care was to be maintained as a gesture of good will. Klingenberg even ordered the schools to remain open and placed no restrictions on daily business. He did, however, place an 8 p.m. curfew on the city; only citizens with a pass signed by him could legally venture outside their homes after that time. >The next day, April 13, more of Klingenberg's men who had remained on the opposite side of the river followed their leader into the city. Seeing the German flag, they believed that the main force had somehow bypassed them. They were amazed to find the 'lost' men in command of the primary objective, with the locals not hostile but actually accommodating. Hossfelder told the new arrivals what had transpired and warned them to play along. They flexed their military muscle by commandeering every vehicle they could find. >Finally, on the night of April 13, the forward elements of Das Reich entered the city expecting a heavy fight. They had disregarded radio transmissions they had received telling of the city's surrender, believing it was an enemy hoax, possibly an attempt to lure German units into an ambush. Rumor had it that Klingenberg and his men had been captured, tortured and forced to release the codes required for proper radio communications. The XLV Corps commander was so furious at not having received his intelligence summary that he had threatened to have Klingenberg court-martialed if he were found alive as a prisoner. The first place he inquired for Klingenberg was at a brothel, figuring that he would find the renegade captain there. The corps A commander's fury soon subsided when he learned why his junior company commander had been negligent in his duties. >The rest of Das Reich and supplemental army Panzergrenadierunits entered Belgrade in force the following day, and instead of fighting their way into the city, they were greeted with wine and cheese. The Yugoslav prisoners were conscripted to reinforce the German defense in case of partisan attacks. >Sadly, when the mayor realized that he had been duped, he shot himself. On April 17, Josip Broz, better known as Tito, the trade unionist and leader of the 'illegal' Communist Party, acknowledged defeat in Yugoslavia and surrendered the country in name only. He fled into the mountains with his partisans, where, supported by the British, he waged a four-year guerrilla campaign against his country's invaders. He would later become president of a Communist Yugoslavia, which nevertheless rejected association with the Soviet-dominated Warsaw Pact.Klingenberg persuaded the garrison commander to relinquish his maps and divulge the location of his minefields and gun emplacements, as well as the nearby anti-aircraft emplacements and adjacent auxiliary airstrip. Markers were placed that could be clearly seen from the air, and German transports were able to land, bringing food, ammunition and war correspondents. Klingenberg even had some of the prisoners repair the damaged runways and confiscated several obsolete aircraft. German Intelligence had projected before Belgrade surrendered that Yugoslav army casualties would number approximately 10,000 to 15,000 wounded and 2,000 dead after massive Luftwaffe and artillery bombardment and a subsequent fight to enter the city. Civilian casualties were predicted to be 10 times those figures. Klingenberg was concerned for the welfare of his men, yet he was also worried about the fate of the civilians. He did not see the need for further bloodshed in the city, and his men were actually treated well by the civilians, who knew that they could have suffered a much worse fate.At first, the German high command did not believe that the city had been taken. There was even word that Klingenberg would be shot for trying to fake such an exploit. Two days of radio transmissions were needed to convince Berlin that all was well. Lieutenant General Paul Hausser was ordered to inspect for himself. >>1472453 >When Klingenberg reported to his superiors to explain why he had not followed orders, he was drunk, unshaven and smelled of perfume. After several minutes of heavy grilling, the frustrated Klingenberg said, 'What was I to do, give the city back?' >His indiscretions were overlooked, and the German battle plan, now obsolete, was stamped 'completed.' >The drive into Greece was now ahead of schedule. The cost of the entire Yugoslavian campaign to Germany was 558 wounded and 151 killed, with less than a dozen aircraft lost. More than 340,000 Yugoslavs were captured. The exact number killed will never be known. >For his daring exploit, Klingenberg was awarded the Knight's Cross, and he became a favorite of the SS inner circle. The 'Old Man,' as he came to be known, was periodically sent to Bad Tölz as an instructor on tactics and battlefield initiative. On March 15, 1944, he became the only Bad Tölz graduate to assume command of the school Klingenberg was not a hearty drinker or talker and never boasted of his accomplishments. >When later asked by students at Bad Tölz how he had captured the capital of a country, he simply said, 'I was not too preoccupied at the time, and found something to do."

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"I was not too preoccupied at the time, and found something to do."


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File: 1697975654965394.png (626 KB, 882x661) Russians form a mechanized battalion from the crew of the Admiral Kuznetsov aircraft carrier ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:43:58 No.62547520 >>62547549 >>62547640 >>62547779 >>62547930 >>62548026 >>62548130 >>62548146 >>62548167 >>62548426 >>62548452 >>62548545 >>62548551 >>62548626 >>62549652 >>62550289 >>62550646 >>62550651 >>62551002 >>62552479 >>62552913 >>62553443 >>62553449 >>62556171 >>62556338 >>62560060 >>62560830 >>62561063 >We were sent to the front last month, somewhere near Pokrovsk. The kind of place where the wind howls through hollowed-out villages, and the ground is soft from more than rain. >They brought the "special troops" in two weeks after we arrived. >They arrived in the dead of night, no fanfare, no noise. Just a convoy of black trucks with no markings. Their uniforms were like ours, mostly. But they didn't wear them quite right. The fit was off, too loose in places, too tight in others, as if they weren't built for human bodies. >But nobody questioned it-how could we? Orders are orders. They kept to themselves, rarely spoke, and when they did, it was in low voices, murmuring to each other in a language I didn't recognize. It wasn't Russian. It wasn't any language I'd ever heard before. It sounded wet, like the words were being dragged through water, thick and heavy in their throats. >Some of the men said that they were mutants, survivors of some forgotten Soviet ship. We laughed, but it was forced. >The first time we went out on patrol with them, they kept going off on their own. >Eventually, I got curious. >I followed one into a bombed out building. There was a body on the ground, a civilian, maybe. Torn apart, limbs scattered across the room, skin peeled back like a butchered animal. He was knelt down beside the body, slow and deliberate, and reached out with one hand and pressed against it. I swear to God, I saw the body twitch. Just for a moment. A flicker of life or something close to life-stirring in the corpse. Then it stopped. >I backed away before he could notice me. I didn't tell anyone what I saw. Who would believe me? >After that, I started noticing things. The way they never seemed to sleep, just stood in their tents at night, perfectly still. The way the smell of rot followed them, no matter where they went. >I don't know what they are. I don't think I want to know. But they're not soldiers. >And whatever they're doing here, it's not for the war. Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:35:39 No.62548545 >>62548556 >>62547520 (OP) >Zhenya got shot during the last raid >We were on our way back, doing our best to keep the trees between us and the hohols >Zhenya was in the lead with one of the Hовобранеч when we came to a large gap in the treeline >We thought we were far enough back to risk a sprint across instead of belly-crawling through the muck like usual >Sergeant Korolevsky tried to order the новобранеч to run across, but it didn't seem to hear him and kept listlessly rolling its head around to stare at...well, God alone knows what it saw. >That meant Zhenya was up, poor bastard. >He had an icon one of the Orthodox priests was selling, and he took a moment to pray to it before starting off >Maybe we had gotten turned around, or maybe they had a forward position not on the maps. Maybe it was another of their damned spotter drones. I don't know. >In any case, Zhenya was halfway across when their sniper opened up on him >The first round was short, but he got winged by the second >Even from fifty meters away I could see his leg was bending wrong before he toppled over >Even from fifty meters away, we could hear him screaming >The новобранeч's head instantly snapped around to face Zhenya >Sergeant Korolevsky was yelling at us to take cover while he ordered a smoke mission, but the новобранеч didn't hear that, either >It reached the edge of the trees and started loping over to where Zhenya lay >The sniper opened up on the Hовобранеч, naturally >The first round hit the dirt at its feet, but it took no more notice of that than it had Sergeant Korolevsky >The second hit the новобранеч in the chest, but its armor must have taken the brunt of the impact because it didn't even slow down >I'm not sure what happened to the third shot. The bullet landed some distance behind the новобранеч, and I though I saw a puff of dust around its chin, but I couldn't be sure. >> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:36:53 No.62548556 >>62549969 >>62551438 >>> >>62548545 >By that point, it had reached Zhenya, and bent over to inspect him >Zhenya hadn't stopped screaming, of course. He'd sold the last dose of painkillers to a Chechen for some food the last time we were in the rear, and the bullet must have missed anything vital or he would have bled out by now >But as the Hовобранеч stood over him, a note of something other than pain entered his cries >It seemed to stand there for a minor eternity as the sniper put more shots out towards the two of them, but the sniper's aim seemed off and the rounds went wild >Finally, the Hовобранеч grabbed Zhenya by his plate carrier and hoisted hoisted him over its shoulder one-handed >It loped off to the other side of the gap, then kept going >We could hear Zhenya's screaming fade as it disappeared into the distance, but the mortar's weren't working yet and none of us fancied out chances against the sniper >Eventually the mission came in and we were able to cross the gap >Korolevsky must have been owed a favor for it to come in at all. Thank God for the minor mercies, I suppose. >When we made it back to our lines, Zhenya wasn't there >That was probably for the best, given that we didn't even have clean water, much less an aid station >I heard that he had been sent back to the rear for surgery, and that was the last we knew of Zhenya >We tried asking after him a few more times, but our commander reminded us what happened to people who drew attention to themselves >We cursed his luck at first, me and the rest of my unit >But now.. >A week or two after Zhenya got shot, we were out in one of the trenches and needed some extra ammo >Arkady left the trenches his normal blustery self >The man who returned was quiet, almost ashen-faced. >Naturally, we asked him why, and he told us he had seen the newest batch of Hовобранечи >He said he thought one of them walked with a limp and had a tarnished cross around its neck >Now, we do not talk of Zhenya any more. ☐ Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)02:47:57 No.62551438 ►>>62553469 >>62548556 >We called him Goggles. He shipped in after Vashnya died. >A great big balaclava hung loosely around his crooked neck. A rotted row of teeth peaked out from underneath his mask to greet us, and atop it all sat those bulky tinted goggles. They were so dark its a wonder he could see at all. >He never spoke Russian. He'd chatter to himself like a squirrel, huddled in the foxhole he'd torn into the ground with his hands. >I meant to welcome him with a drink. Maybe I needed some companionship. I found him crumpled against the wall of his burrow, snoring in big, wheezy exhales. He somehow faced me despite his chest being pressed into the foxhole wall. >I went to wake him, grabbing the man's shoulder, but it felt all wrong. I knew firsthand what our uniforms felt like, that there should have been no thick, rubbery layer under our cloth, but as I grabbed something slid and slipped under my hands and I began to feel uneasy. He failed to wake. >My eyes drifted to his namesake. A peek wouldn't hurt, right? My hand grasped the plastic and pulled, coming away with a sickening squelch. >A fetid smell made me wretch, yet it could not hold a candle to the sight below me. >Streaky pale skin greeted me, blotched with unnatural color and run through with swollen veins. It hung loose, like an ill-fitting wetsuit, and the gaunt skeleton below seemed sharp and unfamiliar. A few strand of hair, the color and texture of rotting hay, lay haphazardly around his face. >The eyes were the worst. Sunken, pitted, partially covered with swollen eyelids yet open, they reminded me of two shiny black olives. I realized with horror that each eye held a dark gaping wound, as if the two orbs had been pitted. >In those ragged teeth I could see flesh, torn from the bleeding scabs that used to be his lips and god knows where else. >And though it never stopped wheezing, I could have sworn a ghost of a smile played across its maw as I scrambled in from its burrow. >We never did share that drink. >> Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:50:09 No.62547548 ► >> >soldier formerly stationed on Kusnetsov gets administered to hospital for withdrawal symptoms related to breathing clean air not saturated with sulfur and soot Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:50:25 No.62547549 ► >>62547520 (OP). >mind your business stalger Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:57:15 No.62547585 ►>>62547595 >> >why contain it << >> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)17:48:25 No.62547887 >>62548016 >>62548051 >>62550308 >>62550328 >>62554367 >>62558331 >>62563352 >>62547779 The gates of Rl'yeh are open and the dreamer dreams everything. Two more millenia. Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:08:26 No.62548016 >>62548051 >>62550310 >>62554367 >>62558331 >>62547887 The Idiot God is a rooster, but the Black Pharaoh is raising the eyebrow. Once the mother of a thousand young gives birth, the West will understand everything and their Miskatonic "advisors" in the so called Ukraine will wail and claw at their eyes in blind, all devouring madness. la! In! Z phtagn! Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:09:06 No.62548026 ►>>62548050 >>62548169 >>62551012 File: 1585525075136.png (1.25 MB, 1302x1294) >>62547520 (OP) F--- off Deep Ones, this is Goat territory ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:14:46 No.62548050 ►>>62548065 File: the yellow sign.jpg (11 KB, 480x360) >>62548026 go back2 woods shub >>> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:14:53 No.62548051 >>62548107 >>62554367 >>62558331 >>62547887 >>62548016 for more information check out Intel Phtagn C >>☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:17:48 No.62548065 >>62548169 >>62550990 File: 65165165165.jpg (226 KB, 850x1200) >>62548050 Make me >>☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:17:32 No.62548394 ►>>62548507 >>62550406 >>62551114 >>62560298 >>62561649 >>> I hear the Russians are conscripting shoggoths from the cyclopean ruins beneath the non euclidean peaks of the Urals. How will those stack up against the Americans from the Devil's Reef PMC? ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:36:05 No.62548547 >>62548651 My buddy forgot the number rule, THEY COME FROM THE ANGLES. ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:49:13 No.62548651 ► File: 1593464725608.jpg (286 KB, 816x1253) >>62548547 That sounds very silly and highly unlikely to ever happen >>> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:38:04 No.62548564 ►>>62548663 In this house we salute the tatters of the King and kneel before the Yellow Sign. >> Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:41:22 No.62548588 ► We must avoid any escalatory measures against the Church of Starry Wisdom. >>> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)20:22:45 No.62548938 >>62549013 >>62550498 Irrelevant, Flying Polyps are useless in a GROUND war >> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)20:43:58 No.62549106 >>62549205 >>62550520 I only get my news from cryptic messages from Dreamland Cats. ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)20:56:04 No.62549205 ►>>62550520 >>62549106 I only get my Information from Pickman's paintings. He drew Prigo's march on Moscow months ahead. The bad part is that he also painted what drove Prigo to do it, and I have been unable to get a decent nichts sleep ever since. >> Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)00:25:11 No.62550520 >>62550556 >>62549106 >>62549205 Fools, the only reliable source of information comes from the final moments of the actors' lives whilst their tweaking out during the climax of the third act of The King in Yellow. >> ☐ Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)00:27:36 No.62550533 ►>>62550603 >>62551235 >>62554090 >>62559698 >>62560176 >>62560315 File: Putin-1578996.jpg (25 KB, 590x350) >three years into the SOO (Special occult operation), and this is what Russia has to show for it: >loses the temple of the Old Ones on Snake Island after briefly siezing it(remember that he who controls Snake Island controls the course of history) << >unable to take Odessa despite trying to bribe Dagon for assistance with VDV mass sacrifices (Deep Ones feast on the floating corpses, refuse to step into the meat grinder) >Bogged down by undead SS divisions in Mariupol, leading to the Donbas Holocaust becoming reality at last (courtesy of Dr Herbert West) >feeding a good chunk of the gunship fleet into a time anomaly (were they are exploding to this day) >Prigozhin driven so mad by what he saw in the "salt mines" that he marched on Moscow to stop Putin from further meddling in things he doesn't comprehend (to no avail, the sacrifices will continue until the stars improve) >Wagner columns getting massacred by Alhazredi cultists in Africa (prisoner used in rituals) >GUR showing more and more signs of being led by an avatar of Nyarlahotep And that's just what I can come up with on the drop of a hat. There's bound to be more. Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)04:51:52 No.62552172 Igor thought he would get a part on the spoils of the land; the only thing he got was a grenade to the face. His flesh was charred, few of his teeth remain, where the nose used to be now there was a deep hole, his eye sockets were empty, a white substance running from the edges down the cheeks. Igor did not have a face anymore, but his body did not care, he kept going through the mud, the flooded trenches, the rat infested camps and bombed fields, searching for a face, his body demanded a face, and he was going to get one. Even to this day, every mobik watched carefully between the rows of trees, because he could be there, stalking and waiting for the moment to reclaim what he lost. >> Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat) 14:33:17 No.62554147 File: Download-1.jpg (14 KB, 259x194) >>62554344 >>62554391 >>> Found this in an abandoned trench. What unit is this? Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat) 15:15:27 No.62554344 ► >>62554147 How you do, fellow earthling primate, that is a bad luck sign, I would not use it. My advice is genuine.
File: 1375153631534.jpg-(79 KB, 1023x797, 1367472222142.jpg) Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:07 UTC-5 No. 17355769 >>17355833 >>17355954 >>17356893 Replies: >>17355793 >>17355796 >>17355804 >>17355816 Lets say you're flying a mission over enemy territory in a helicopter when suddenly you are hit with a MANPAD/SAM/AAA. How would you e--------? Would it be possible without hitting the blades? Also helicopter thread Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:10 UTC-5 No. 17355816 >>17355769 (OP) I would stroke until the missile hit, then paint the cockpit white with man foam. Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:09 UTC-5 No. 17355804 >>17355769 (OP) I wouldn't have to worry about e---------- cause I'd be f------ dead. /k/ - A Magical Place Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:11 UTC-5 No. 17355833 Replies: >>17355847 >>17355860 >>17355876 >>17355769 (OP) I would climb out of the burning helicopter as it spiraled out of control, standing proudly in the open door with my erect c--- in hand, e---------- over everyone in sight until the chopper smashed into the ground and exploded around me. The last thing my enemies would see of me is flaming semen coating their stunned faces, and thus the war was won. Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:28 UTC-5 No. 17356110 Replies: >>17356142 >deep in enemy territory >missiles everywhere >suddenly direct hit >rotor on fire and chopper gets hit again >look over at pilot >he's sitting there screaming and jerking it Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:30 UTC-5 No.17356142 >>17356110 In a Kiowa, that wouldn't be all that weird.
File: 1538517416955m.jpg (112 KB, 1024x768) OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 14:16:15 No.39810376 >>39810436 >>39810445 >>39810663 >>39810708 >>39810899 >>39811038 >>39811183 >>39811856 I finally did it /k/. I actually f------ done it and don't know what exactly to say about it. Long story short I went out hunting in the Ozarks (Arkansas Man here) and killed a Deer and decided to actually f--- it's vagina and it felt good despite the weird situation. I don't know if anyone saw but it was something alright and decided to tag it later and had it cut up and now gonna have deer steak for dinner tonight. There is a f------ alot of deer in Arkansas which would explain why everyone comes here to this natural state. >> ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 14:23:27 No.39810436 ►>>39810498 >>39810376 (OP). >F----- it than are it. Congrats you're going to hell OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 14:31:12 No.39810498 ►>>39810816 >>39812326 >>39810436 I'm not going to hell because I'm a good christian and god loves me. At least i ate the animal and not left it to rot like some of other people around here do! OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:20:33 No.39810873 >>39810890 >>39810663 I didn't have my phone because I was hunting, not posting and twittering s--- and besides i rented out a cabin around northwest so I can enjoy the time of being away from a town for a while anyways and now I'm back. Anyhow the meat was pretty good and it's great in stew making. >>39810708 I was hunting at first but the temptation after approaching it got the betterment of me and yes it was dying as I had my pleasures with it's vagina but at least it was still warm before it passed. >>39810754 Take me a while to greentext it out so give me a moment will ya? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)15:22:31 No.39810890 ► >>39810873 use a trap next time, throw a net on it or order a form of tranqs. OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:23:19 No.39810893 ►>>39810915 >>39810951 >>39810816 the temptation after approaching it got the betterment of me I'm not a bad man alright and besides it wasn't the first animal I committed sin before. I f----- a hog before during hunting but that was because I was curious. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:24:28 No.39810898 ► Anon I'm on nofap, you'd better give me something juicy I'm not a bad man alright OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:38:36 No.39811023 >>39811095 >>39811139 >>39811155 >>39811365 >>39811380 >>39811899 >>39811960 >>39812302 >>39812374 >>39812713 >>39812959 >>39812978>>39813276 >be me >be out in deep woods of the Ozarks >have my mosin nagant that i had with me for a long time >it's rusted badly after accidentally dropping it in the river but retrieved it and cleaned it up so it's clean and safe to shoot in my opinion >be wearing nothing but boots, blue jeans and a wife beater's shirt >hidden beside a giant rock and some trees and overlooking the river >see a pack of deer come by and see a buck nearby one of them >pick my rifle up and take aim but can't hit the buck since the f----- was behind a tree and a crowd of other does >decide to kill me a female deer instead >take aim at the biggest one >pull trigger >BOOM >the rest scatter and the one i hit fell and got up and gallop down the river side then fell several feets away making loud deer noise >f------ ears hurt and unload my spent surplus round >make my way over to the dying deer and was about to shoot it's head >see it's vagina >get tempted and feel my erection build up >goddamnit >try and resist but the curiosity got the betterment of me and i decided to drop my pants and boxer while holding my rifle on one hand >get on my knees and press my d--- up against it's p---- >it kicks it's legs and yelps so i ended up headbutted the deer in the head with my rifle and it stopped and just shook from nerve shock instead >slide my d--- in and started to f--- the deer >holy f--- I'm actually f------ a deer >proceed to do this for 10 minutes straight till i cummed inside >did it again and cummed again inside >by this point the vagina was cold and i pulled my d--- out >it felt f------ good >go by the river and wash my crotch with natural water and pull myself together >field dress the deer and drag it back to the cabin and proceed to take the meat and cook me deer steak and saved the rest in a freezer >enjoyed my time in the cabin as i ate the rest of the meat and return to town And that is how my hunting trip went. Anonymous 11/24/18(Sat) 15:40:19 No.39811038 ▸ >>39811056 >>39810376 (OP) >f------ a four legged animal >f------ a corpse >f------ the corpse of a four legged animal congrats, you are now an honorary afghani OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:42:24 No.39811056 ►>>39811191 >>39811038 by this point the vagina was cold and i pulled my d--- out I'm not a Muslim. I'm a white man born and raised in Arkansas alright and I love this great state. Godbless this natural state. OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:44:50 No.39811083 So yeah that's my story. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:46:33 No.39811095 ► File: 1541828998674.png (180 KB, 399x509) >>39811023 What the f--- Arkansas I'm not a bad man alright ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:48:54 No.39811113 >>39811207 >>39811236 How did deer poon compare to normal poon, anon? OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:59:50 No.39811207 ► >>39811113 It felt odd, like it was strange feeling but once you get into it you don't think and just keep thrusting til you finish. It felt like one of those normal bland fleshlights but more vertical up and down and tight around the horizontal area and it kept fluctuating between tight and soft since she was dying. By the time I finished the second time it was really soft and the deer was dead then before i field dressed it and taking it back to the cabin. ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:01:04 No.39811221 >>39811263 All memes aside the first person I met in Arkansas f----- his 1st cousin the day I met him Arkansas is a weird place /k/ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:03:52 No.39811246 >>39811258 >>39811260 >>39813291 Wait... is this the same Arkansas guy that had a makeshift boat that overturned on water and lost his rifle in the water then dived in to get it abd came across a water moskin snake but but the snake hard on the neck and retrieved his rifke and got on shore and ripped the snakes head off with his own teeth? Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:05:55 No.39811269 >>39811316 This is why skinwalkers stay away from Arkansas. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:07:12 No.39811282 ► Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:11:38 No.39811316 ►>>39811332 >>39811269 What if he accidentally a skinwalker and that was the skinwalker he accidentally? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:13:10 No.39811332 >>39811350 >>39811316 that's why no one finds them, they're slow because they're inbred. their disguise is actually a beacon for fellow degenerates ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:16:06 No.39811350 ► >>39811332 I mean what if op actually just necroraped a skinwalker and ate it? Why are you shocked? OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:28:37 No.39811444 ► I thought you guys like to f--- deer? Why are you shocked? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:31:27 No.39811469 >>39811479 File: 48DCFE7E-E429-49F6-905A-2(...).jpg (8 KB, 310x230) 60 DED CH Hey mods, can you make this ban a public one? I haven't seen one in person in the 5 years I've been here. It is the Thanksgiving season after all Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:32:11 No.39811479 ► >>39811849 >>39811469 this ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:47:52 No.39811593 >>39811921 Is that you kero the wolf Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 17:36:28 No.39811899 ► >>39811023 So, truth-time, OP. Was it better than your sister? kero the wolf Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 17:45:45 No.39811960 ▸ >>39812104 >>39811023 Only in f------ arky. You guys are actually messed up in the head. Stop inbreeding OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:05:43 No.39812104 ► >>39811960 Hey don't talk s--- about Arkansas you a------! This state is the greatest state in the United States and we have more guns, more gun rights, more animals, more game, more freedom than Texas and Florida plus we got f------ diamonds so shut it prick. Plus the age of consent here is 16 while it's 18 in Texas only. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:17:07 No.39812213 ►>>39813756 And this is why /k/ is nsfw Plus the age of consent here is 16 while it's 18 in Texas Why are you shocked? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:21:07 No.39812240 ► >S--- summer >S--- winter >All creatures want to bite you >Ticks are everywhere and so are snakes and brown recluses >The ground is soft everywhere and the non soft grounds are nothing but rocks everywhere >The Ozarks are impassable unless you're walking due to lack of funding for roads >Locals are borderline feral or addicted to Meth and won't blink when they get a chance at killing >Church based militias are likely to kidnap you in a SHTF scenario >More guns and knifes in the entire state than the armories in Texas and that is not counting for the non documented owned guns >Literal stories of people disappearing in the Ozark Forest in just 24 hours and search teams won't even bother searching for them unless pressured to do it >Not even Skinwalkers would want to step foot into Arkansas due to fear of getting r---- and murdered and possibly eaten by the Arkansas locals >F------ Hogs man Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:29:05 No.39812302 ►>>39812325 >>39812729 File: the.jpg (78 KB, 800x526) >>39811023 Honestly? reading this gave me a massive boner. and it just accepts it. I'd love to forcibly f--- something like that while it's life slowly slips away. It has no choice but to lay there. I can dump my seed inside of it. Whatever I want to it, But I would like to feed it to family afterwards, eating it alone would be too f----- up. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:32:27 No.39812325 ► >>39812302 >But I would like to feed it to family afterwards >eating it alone would be too f----- up. huh I'd love to forcibly f--- something like that while it's life slowly slips away. It has no choice but to lay there. But I would like to feed it to family afterwards, eating it alone would be too f----- up. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:32:34 No.39812326 ►>>39812374 >>39810498 >some people around here shoot deer, f--- their corpses, and leave them to rot. That's just not right. Don't they know you're supposed to use every part of the animal. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:38:21 No.39812374 ► >>39812326 That... actually raises a good point. >>39811023 OP, you forgot to mention the a---. too f----- up Not using every part of the animal would be sinfully wasteful I mean, you did use its a------, right? Not using every part of the animal would be sinfully wasteful, and I know you're a good christian who wouldn't waste what the good lord provided. ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)22:10:33 No.39814186 ► File: fed.png (34 KB, 298x279) Stop it, boner. >>39812417 Goddamnit anon, stop making me want to defile woodland animals ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)22:44:28 No.39814454 ► File: 1525122191621.jpg (84 KB, 596x598) This whole f------ thread is a showcase of autism and I love it. too f----- up Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)23:05:54 No.39814586 ► File: 1539552825897.gif (788 KB, 600x338) i wonder if the people who processed your deer noticed c-- dripping out and began to wonder I'm proud of you, OP Why are you shocked? 11/24/18: /K/ommando F---- a Deer A MAGICAL PLACE /k/
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