: Anonymous 73 KB PNG 07/16/22(Sat)17:27:46 No.882132533 >have a s----- lonely life >will never have friends, a girlfriend, a good happy life >one day dream about having a girlfriend >she is extremely cute, after i wake up, i am both happy from the dream and sad that its over >i start dreaming about her or other girls in the next nights >also dream that i have a lot of friends, cool cars, yachts, even superpowers >start meditating before sleeping to influence my dreams >learn lucid dreaming to improve it >after a few months, i became a true dream director >i can now create my own reality in my dreams >spend up to 16 hours sleeping >at this point, my real life feels like a nightmare and my dreams like the life i deserve why havent you taken the dream pill yet anons?

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: jpg

Resolution: (750px x 943px)

File size: 96.5 KB

Anonymous (ID: GIVKOHDY ) 305 KB JPG 03/15/25(Sat) 16:21:44 No.500528669 >get told all my life that my culture is bad >I have to feel guilty for a war I never participated in >my country gets flooded with Sand Monkeys and N------ to the point my own small town is unrecognizable >trannies and f------ are parading everywhere >if you speak out against anything of this you will get labeled a far right extremist and shunned >suddenly some Russian on the East is knocking on the door of the EU >American in the West is backing him >both stand for the same values I share >Euroleaders realize that their little liberal project is threatened >now after everything they did to us they have the guts to ask young European men to be ready to defend their homes Seriously why tf would I fight for this s-------? So more privileged Arabs can sit around here? So more LGBTQ mutants can harass children? To defend this feminist dystopia? Seriously what the f--- is going through their heads that makes them think European men are ready to pick up Guns to defend this s-------

Anonymous 03/13/25(Thu)18:26:08 No.705245726 1703201596893.png 1.44 MB PNG >Dev A: Our next character will be a woman from France, what should be one of her main characteristics? >Dev B: Give her a huge ass. >Dev A: Brilliant.

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Settings Mobile Home Anonymous (ID: dnOrB8tl) 03/14/25(Fri)19:31:31 No.500474970 665 KB PNG >This was considered liberal in 2019

View All 45,263 Images

Anon wants to buy Battletoads | /r/Greentext

ile: 1342157412115.jpg-(56 KB. 445x599, ps.jpg) Anonymous (ID: 96q1xtFL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:32:48 No.411885919 >"gold and silver" >oh man I didnt know you guys are still open >...."yeah we are" >oh okay, im looking for battletoads >"not s--- s--- again, its 11:00 at night" >click Anonymous (ID: 96q1xtFL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:34:59 No.411886329 File: 1342157699363.png-(114 KB, 200x190, jimmies 16.png) Try to rustle my jimmies again m----------- Anonymous (ID: MIXLgTKx) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:36:00 No.411886517 >gold and silver >"hey I'm really into antiques you guys got any battletoads?" >yeah go to our ebay site we got a handheld one by Tiger >"oh sweet man thanks" Anonymous (ID: KNEOUSjL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:30:12 No.411885328 >Prank Call pawn stars from history channel >They're open 24/7 >Ask for battletoads >They always rage >lulz will be had >> Anonymous (ID: 96q1xtFL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:30:29 No.411885392 (702) 385-7912 >press 4 >yep >"bye >click Anonymous (ID: U+S/32YA) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:45:12 No.411888367 >"gold and silver" >Hi, I'm an antique video game collector and I'm looking for a very old, extremely rare title >"if you say Battletoads I'm going to call the cops" >What's with your discrimination on battletoads? >hangs up Anonymous (ID: 10qQE9pk) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:55:23 No.411890545 >hello gold and silver >hello, I'm calling from Texas and I'm interested in purchasing a certain Super Bowl ring >absolutely sir! what team and what year >(boring conversation about the ring) >Are you interested in completing the purchase of the ring this evening? >Yes, but I have a question first >Yes sir? >Does it come with BATTLETOADS!? >click Anonymous (ID: CBN2x14W) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:06:37 No.411892770 >Gold and silver! >Hey do you guys have any signed bat- >What the hell is wrong with you nerds? Calling asking for battle toads not funny or original like are you serious dude? really man? >...bats....signed bats, like from the MLB mainly the NY Yankees or the Mets, maybe even the Dodgers...what were you saying about battle toads though? >Oh sorry sir we're just getting a bunch of prank phone calls lately >Oh that's weird... people have no lives right? (haha)...anyway, do you guys have any signed bats from the Boston Battletoads? >Are you f------ kidding me dude >click Anonymous (ID: CjDOiaMp) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:09:31 No.411893323 >gold and silver >Hey i was wondering if you had the wii matt >yeah we've got it >does it work with webbed feet? >what? >does it come with battletoads Anonymous (ID: 10qQE9pk) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:24:10 No.411895769 Trying it again >Gold and Silver >Hello, I have a few quick questions about. >This better not be about battletoads. >Excuse me? I needed to ask about a sword I've been looking for. >I'm sorry sir, we've just been getting a lot of prank calls tonight. What exactly are you looking for? >It's a very old sword, it is also very small. It fits in a BATTLETOADS hand perfectly. >F--- you >click Anonymous (ID: 7TTI0kdH) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:27:55 No.411896409 >Gold and silver >Hil -- >This better not be about battle toads, im losing patience kid >ummm no its not... what's a battletoad? >its some game everyone is calling about tonight >battletoads? yea that sounds good ill take one if you got it click nonymous (ID: pFk+WkJY) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:31:58 No.411897092 >Gold and Silver >Hi how are you? >What can I do for you? >I'm a book dealer, you have antiques? >What you for? >You have anything from Philip K. D---? >Maybe, whats the title? >Battling on Toad Planet >*click* Callback, cause I'm an a------ >You hung up on me. >Who is this? >*click* >The customer you hung up on. That is horrible customer service. >Listen, we don't have time for your pranks f------ kids. >Pranks? What the hell did you just say to me? I'll have you know I'm prior military, 82nd Airborne "Battle Toads". I do.. >*click* One more time for good measure >Gold and pawn >BATTLETOADS Anonymous (ID: 5iLX8qBG) 07/13/12(Fri)02:40:31 No.411898453 >Gold and Silver >Hey, I'm looking for an engagement ring for my girlfriend. >You are going to have o call back during the day, we don't do any sales after 9 >Oh, well is there any way I can ask you a couple questions? >Sure, shoot. >I want a memorable ring, maybe something from a movie or a game >mhm >Oh! Do you guys have the ring from Battletoads? >-sigh-f------ really, man? You must be giving that to a guy. His insults are amazing Anonymous (ID: rYFKkn5U) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:40:40 No.411898474 >Gold and Silver >Hi, I was calling to inquire about an antique hand-gun >Sure, what's the name of the gun you're looking for, exactly? >1912 9 millimeter battletoad hand- click Anonymous (ID: g8ArJkJF) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:41:06 No.411898550 >Gold and Silver >Hello this is the Las Vegas police department my name is Officer Peterson. My office recieved a call from someone here saying that your store was being Harrassed by someone repeatedly asking for uh "Battletoads?" >Uh sorry sir but I Dont remember calling you can you give me the name of who did? >Yes his name was Le Reddit >Sorry...who was it again? >His name was Austin Russel >He isnt in right now....what was your name again? >Officer Battletoad >Hang up Anonymous (ID: +7ZokLvE) 07/13/12 (Fri)03:07:59 No.411902870 >Gold and Silver >Hey I was wondering if you deal in rare books? >Lemmie guess you want a Battletoad instruction book?? >Excuse me?? >Nevermind. Lot of prank calls tonight >Pfft. kids in the summertime can't find anything else better to do, eh? >Yeah, well we don't really deal in books but we do have some here. What are you looking for? >Do you happen to have anything by Hemmingway? "Old Man And The Sea" perhaps? >I don't think so... you'd have to call during the daytime or come in to find out. >Ah... OK. Well I also have one i'd like to sell off. It's a signed J.K. Rowling first print >The Harry Potter author? >Yeah I had one of her books signed by her. "Harry Potter And The Order Of The Battletoad" >You f----- kidding m- >Click im still laughing

Anon discovers modern schooling | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/08/22(Sat)02:32:40 No.66894250 35 KB JPG >babysitting nephew >11 years old >he's doing remote school >watch in for a bit >teacher is like 15 minutes late >she's obviously high or hungover, is barely able to slur words that were written before, looks like she just woke up and is still in a t-shirt and sweatpants. >after a few minutes of listening nephew just puts on his headphones and starts playing minecraft I'm 28, no kids, so I had no idea this was happening but have kids just been not going to school for the past 2 years

Anon goes to his aunts house | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 16 KB JPG 07/16/22(Sat)10:53:44 No.882118684 >be me, 18 >at aunt's house >go to the living room and see baby laying on the couch >go to play with him >aunt says with another child on her hands, "Leave anon, you are making me uncomfortable" I didn't even look at her once, I was just playing with the baby Why would my aunt see me as a creep 07/16/22(Sat)11:03:39 No.882118973 : Anonymous Your raging erection probably gave it away

Bada-bing-bada-ring | /r/Greentext

$: Anonymous Bada-bing-bada-ring A 164 KB PNG 07/16/22(Sat) 14:45:12 No.69432310 > Circa 2012 there was a number you could call on Skype that would connect you to any business in the US toll free. > With fellow shitbrain friends on Skype (ab)using the service. > Remeber Family Guy episode where Peter grows a moustache and thinks he can speak Italian. > ~\.idea\ > Call a random Italian restaurant in New York City, NY lady answers. > "Ey, Joe's Pizza here, how-you-doin'?" > "Buongiorno, pai-pipi-popo-papa." > "What? I don't speak Italian. Hold on let me get Joe" > Hear loud talking and banging of pots and pans in the background, before man comes to the phone. > "Ey-yo it's Joe her', how you doing?" > "Ciao, papi-dipopo-papa?" > hangs up > Repeat a few throughout a week. Now the hanging up is generally preceded by at least a "Prick" or "F--- you". > Joe gets progressively more irrate with every call. > Comes to the point where NY lady immediately slams the phone down in the middle of my "Buongiorno". > adjust.svg > Ring again, NY lady answers, in my best US accent, ask if Joe's working and if he can come to the phone. > "Sjure hol' on a sec." > I again hear, the now very familiar to my ears, banging of pots and shouting between NY lady and Joe, before Joe picks up the horn. > "Ey-yo Joe her', what-cannado-fo-you?" > "Papodo-pini-ponando?" > Receive a barrage of verbal aggression, I before thought was not possible to convey, through the just 3100hz bandwith. I don't really know, or care, if any of you find this funny. All i care is that it still cracks me up almost a decade later, just thinking about it. Ah Italians. And Joe if you're still out there. It wasn't my fault, I was given access to power I wasn't ready for.$

Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

View Gallery Random Image

+ Add a Comment

Comments (0)

There are no comments currently available.

Display Comments

+ Add an Image

Image Details

320 views (5 from today)

Uploaded Jul 16, 2022 at 02:29PM EDT

Origin Entry

Greentext Stories

Source

About the Uploader

Reddit Moments

Treasurer & Media Maid

Textile Embed

!https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/404/751/856.jpg!

Yo Yo! You must login or signup first!

Anon takes the V pill | /r/Greentext

More:

Anon wants to buy Battletoads | /r/Greentext

Anon discovers modern schooling | /r/Greentext

Anon goes to his aunts house | /r/Greentext

Bada-bing-bada-ring | /r/Greentext

Have fun zooming again | /r/Greentext

/fit/izen watchdogs against racism | /r/Greentext

Germanon wants to know why burgers hate his people | /r/Greentext

Anon gets cucked | /r/Greentext

If a 4chan user can keep going then you can too | /r/Greentext

anon takes a dump | /r/Greentext

Anon can't get it up | /r/Greentext

halal greentext | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories - Anon takes the V pill | /r/Greentext

Comments (0)

Add a Comment

Image Details

Origin Entry

Source

Tags

About the Uploader

Reddit Moments

Textile Embed

Today's Top Image Galleries

J.D. Vance Face Edits

Invincible War OCs

My Little Pony

Crossover

Yo Yo! You must login or signup first!

Already a memeber?

Don't have an account?

Also Trending:

Anon takes the V pill | /r/Greentext

More:

More:

Comments (0)

Add a Comment

Image Details

Origin Entry

Source

Tags

About the Uploader

Textile Embed

Today's Top Image Galleries