: Anonymous 73 KB PNG 07/16/22(Sat)17:27:46 No.882132533 >have a s----- lonely life >will never have friends, a girlfriend, a good happy life >one day dream about having a girlfriend >she is extremely cute, after i wake up, i am both happy from the dream and sad that its over >i start dreaming about her or other girls in the next nights >also dream that i have a lot of friends, cool cars, yachts, even superpowers >start meditating before sleeping to influence my dreams >learn lucid dreaming to improve it >after a few months, i became a true dream director >i can now create my own reality in my dreams >spend up to 16 hours sleeping >at this point, my real life feels like a nightmare and my dreams like the life i deserve why havent you taken the dream pill yet anons?

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: jpg

Resolution: (750px x 943px)

File size: 96.5 KB

Anonymous (ID: GIVKOHDY ) 305 KB JPG 03/15/25(Sat) 16:21:44 No.500528669 >get told all my life that my culture is bad >I have to feel guilty for a war I never participated in >my country gets flooded with Sand Monkeys and N------ to the point my own small town is unrecognizable >trannies and f------ are parading everywhere >if you speak out against anything of this you will get labeled a far right extremist and shunned >suddenly some Russian on the East is knocking on the door of the EU >American in the West is backing him >both stand for the same values I share >Euroleaders realize that their little liberal project is threatened >now after everything they did to us they have the guts to ask young European men to be ready to defend their homes Seriously why tf would I fight for this s-------? So more privileged Arabs can sit around here? So more LGBTQ mutants can harass children? To defend this feminist dystopia? Seriously what the f--- is going through their heads that makes them think European men are ready to pick up Guns to defend this s-------

Anonymous 03/13/25(Thu)18:26:08 No.705245726 1703201596893.png 1.44 MB PNG >Dev A: Our next character will be a woman from France, what should be one of her main characteristics? >Dev B: Give her a huge ass. >Dev A: Brilliant.

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Settings Mobile Home Anonymous (ID: dnOrB8tl) 03/14/25(Fri)19:31:31 No.500474970 665 KB PNG >This was considered liberal in 2019

View All 45,277 Images

Anon wants to buy Battletoads | /r/Greentext

ile: 1342157412115.jpg-(56 KB. 445x599, ps.jpg) Anonymous (ID: 96q1xtFL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:32:48 No.411885919 >"gold and silver" >oh man I didnt know you guys are still open >...."yeah we are" >oh okay, im looking for battletoads >"not s--- s--- again, its 11:00 at night" >click Anonymous (ID: 96q1xtFL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:34:59 No.411886329 File: 1342157699363.png-(114 KB, 200x190, jimmies 16.png) Try to rustle my jimmies again m----------- Anonymous (ID: MIXLgTKx) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:36:00 No.411886517 >gold and silver >"hey I'm really into antiques you guys got any battletoads?" >yeah go to our ebay site we got a handheld one by Tiger >"oh sweet man thanks" Anonymous (ID: KNEOUSjL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:30:12 No.411885328 >Prank Call pawn stars from history channel >They're open 24/7 >Ask for battletoads >They always rage >lulz will be had >> Anonymous (ID: 96q1xtFL) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:30:29 No.411885392 (702) 385-7912 >press 4 >yep >"bye >click Anonymous (ID: U+S/32YA) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:45:12 No.411888367 >"gold and silver" >Hi, I'm an antique video game collector and I'm looking for a very old, extremely rare title >"if you say Battletoads I'm going to call the cops" >What's with your discrimination on battletoads? >hangs up Anonymous (ID: 10qQE9pk) 07/13/12 (Fri)01:55:23 No.411890545 >hello gold and silver >hello, I'm calling from Texas and I'm interested in purchasing a certain Super Bowl ring >absolutely sir! what team and what year >(boring conversation about the ring) >Are you interested in completing the purchase of the ring this evening? >Yes, but I have a question first >Yes sir? >Does it come with BATTLETOADS!? >click Anonymous (ID: CBN2x14W) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:06:37 No.411892770 >Gold and silver! >Hey do you guys have any signed bat- >What the hell is wrong with you nerds? Calling asking for battle toads not funny or original like are you serious dude? really man? >...bats....signed bats, like from the MLB mainly the NY Yankees or the Mets, maybe even the Dodgers...what were you saying about battle toads though? >Oh sorry sir we're just getting a bunch of prank phone calls lately >Oh that's weird... people have no lives right? (haha)...anyway, do you guys have any signed bats from the Boston Battletoads? >Are you f------ kidding me dude >click Anonymous (ID: CjDOiaMp) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:09:31 No.411893323 >gold and silver >Hey i was wondering if you had the wii matt >yeah we've got it >does it work with webbed feet? >what? >does it come with battletoads Anonymous (ID: 10qQE9pk) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:24:10 No.411895769 Trying it again >Gold and Silver >Hello, I have a few quick questions about. >This better not be about battletoads. >Excuse me? I needed to ask about a sword I've been looking for. >I'm sorry sir, we've just been getting a lot of prank calls tonight. What exactly are you looking for? >It's a very old sword, it is also very small. It fits in a BATTLETOADS hand perfectly. >F--- you >click Anonymous (ID: 7TTI0kdH) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:27:55 No.411896409 >Gold and silver >Hil -- >This better not be about battle toads, im losing patience kid >ummm no its not... what's a battletoad? >its some game everyone is calling about tonight >battletoads? yea that sounds good ill take one if you got it click nonymous (ID: pFk+WkJY) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:31:58 No.411897092 >Gold and Silver >Hi how are you? >What can I do for you? >I'm a book dealer, you have antiques? >What you for? >You have anything from Philip K. D---? >Maybe, whats the title? >Battling on Toad Planet >*click* Callback, cause I'm an a------ >You hung up on me. >Who is this? >*click* >The customer you hung up on. That is horrible customer service. >Listen, we don't have time for your pranks f------ kids. >Pranks? What the hell did you just say to me? I'll have you know I'm prior military, 82nd Airborne "Battle Toads". I do.. >*click* One more time for good measure >Gold and pawn >BATTLETOADS Anonymous (ID: 5iLX8qBG) 07/13/12(Fri)02:40:31 No.411898453 >Gold and Silver >Hey, I'm looking for an engagement ring for my girlfriend. >You are going to have o call back during the day, we don't do any sales after 9 >Oh, well is there any way I can ask you a couple questions? >Sure, shoot. >I want a memorable ring, maybe something from a movie or a game >mhm >Oh! Do you guys have the ring from Battletoads? >-sigh-f------ really, man? You must be giving that to a guy. His insults are amazing Anonymous (ID: rYFKkn5U) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:40:40 No.411898474 >Gold and Silver >Hi, I was calling to inquire about an antique hand-gun >Sure, what's the name of the gun you're looking for, exactly? >1912 9 millimeter battletoad hand- click Anonymous (ID: g8ArJkJF) 07/13/12 (Fri)02:41:06 No.411898550 >Gold and Silver >Hello this is the Las Vegas police department my name is Officer Peterson. My office recieved a call from someone here saying that your store was being Harrassed by someone repeatedly asking for uh "Battletoads?" >Uh sorry sir but I Dont remember calling you can you give me the name of who did? >Yes his name was Le Reddit >Sorry...who was it again? >His name was Austin Russel >He isnt in right now....what was your name again? >Officer Battletoad >Hang up Anonymous (ID: +7ZokLvE) 07/13/12 (Fri)03:07:59 No.411902870 >Gold and Silver >Hey I was wondering if you deal in rare books? >Lemmie guess you want a Battletoad instruction book?? >Excuse me?? >Nevermind. Lot of prank calls tonight >Pfft. kids in the summertime can't find anything else better to do, eh? >Yeah, well we don't really deal in books but we do have some here. What are you looking for? >Do you happen to have anything by Hemmingway? "Old Man And The Sea" perhaps? >I don't think so... you'd have to call during the daytime or come in to find out. >Ah... OK. Well I also have one i'd like to sell off. It's a signed J.K. Rowling first print >The Harry Potter author? >Yeah I had one of her books signed by her. "Harry Potter And The Order Of The Battletoad" >You f----- kidding m- >Click im still laughing

Anon discovers modern schooling | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/08/22(Sat)02:32:40 No.66894250 35 KB JPG >babysitting nephew >11 years old >he's doing remote school >watch in for a bit >teacher is like 15 minutes late >she's obviously high or hungover, is barely able to slur words that were written before, looks like she just woke up and is still in a t-shirt and sweatpants. >after a few minutes of listening nephew just puts on his headphones and starts playing minecraft I'm 28, no kids, so I had no idea this was happening but have kids just been not going to school for the past 2 years

Anon goes to his aunts house | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 16 KB JPG 07/16/22(Sat)10:53:44 No.882118684 >be me, 18 >at aunt's house >go to the living room and see baby laying on the couch >go to play with him >aunt says with another child on her hands, "Leave anon, you are making me uncomfortable" I didn't even look at her once, I was just playing with the baby Why would my aunt see me as a creep 07/16/22(Sat)11:03:39 No.882118973 : Anonymous Your raging erection probably gave it away

Bada-bing-bada-ring | /r/Greentext

$: Anonymous Bada-bing-bada-ring A 164 KB PNG 07/16/22(Sat) 14:45:12 No.69432310 > Circa 2012 there was a number you could call on Skype that would connect you to any business in the US toll free. > With fellow shitbrain friends on Skype (ab)using the service. > Remeber Family Guy episode where Peter grows a moustache and thinks he can speak Italian. > ~\.idea\ > Call a random Italian restaurant in New York City, NY lady answers. > "Ey, Joe's Pizza here, how-you-doin'?" > "Buongiorno, pai-pipi-popo-papa." > "What? I don't speak Italian. Hold on let me get Joe" > Hear loud talking and banging of pots and pans in the background, before man comes to the phone. > "Ey-yo it's Joe her', how you doing?" > "Ciao, papi-dipopo-papa?" > hangs up > Repeat a few throughout a week. Now the hanging up is generally preceded by at least a "Prick" or "F--- you". > Joe gets progressively more irrate with every call. > Comes to the point where NY lady immediately slams the phone down in the middle of my "Buongiorno". > adjust.svg > Ring again, NY lady answers, in my best US accent, ask if Joe's working and if he can come to the phone. > "Sjure hol' on a sec." > I again hear, the now very familiar to my ears, banging of pots and shouting between NY lady and Joe, before Joe picks up the horn. > "Ey-yo Joe her', what-cannado-fo-you?" > "Papodo-pini-ponando?" > Receive a barrage of verbal aggression, I before thought was not possible to convey, through the just 3100hz bandwith. I don't really know, or care, if any of you find this funny. All i care is that it still cracks me up almost a decade later, just thinking about it. Ah Italians. And Joe if you're still out there. It wasn't my fault, I was given access to power I wasn't ready for.$

Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

View Gallery Random Image

+ Add a Comment

Comments (0)

There are no comments currently available.

Display Comments

+ Add an Image

Image Details

321 views (6 from today)

Uploaded Jul 16, 2022 at 02:29PM EDT

Origin Entry

Greentext Stories

Source

About the Uploader

Reddit Moments

Treasurer & Media Maid

Textile Embed

!https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/404/751/856.jpg!

Namaste! You must login or signup first!

Anon takes the V pill | /r/Greentext

More:

Anon wants to buy Battletoads | /r/Greentext

Anon discovers modern schooling | /r/Greentext

Anon goes to his aunts house | /r/Greentext

Bada-bing-bada-ring | /r/Greentext

Have fun zooming again | /r/Greentext

/fit/izen watchdogs against racism | /r/Greentext

Germanon wants to know why burgers hate his people | /r/Greentext

Anon gets cucked | /r/Greentext

If a 4chan user can keep going then you can too | /r/Greentext

anon takes a dump | /r/Greentext

Anon can't get it up | /r/Greentext

halal greentext | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories - Anon takes the V pill | /r/Greentext

Comments (0)

Add a Comment

Image Details

Origin Entry

Source

Tags

About the Uploader

Reddit Moments

Textile Embed

Today's Top Image Galleries

My Little Pony

J.D. Vance Face Edits

Invincible War OCs

Seong Gi-hun's ID Photo

Namaste! You must login or signup first!

Already a memeber?

Don't have an account?

Also Trending:

Anon takes the V pill | /r/Greentext

More:

More:

Comments (0)

Add a Comment

Image Details

Origin Entry

Source

Tags

About the Uploader

Textile Embed

Today's Top Image Galleries