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Calm down, Doctor! Now's not the time for presents. That comes later. | /r/Greentext

File: dr "m claus.jpg (442 KB, 1229x683) Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)18:59:08 No.207294575 ► Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the plane Not a creature was stirring, not even Bane The flight plan was filed with the agency with care CIA knowing the hostages wouldn't all reach there The prisoners were kneeling with bags on their heads With visions of sleighbells and crashing sleds And CIA in his polo, and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap When out on the clouds there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the seat to see what was the matter. Away to the aisle I flew like a flash, Tore open the seatbelt and turned in a dash After shouting and shooting, and questions of Bane One interrupted Wilson, with self-satisfied disdain When, what, from under a hood should appear, But a man, with a mask, and soon it was clear Bigger than average, but still under detain, I knew in a moment it must have been Bane More rapid than eagles CIA's surprise came, And he pointed, and shouted, and called him by name "Bane?" he gasped, with shock and surprise As he realised his flightplan hadn't included this guise How vital was the mask, CIA began to wonder When it would soon sink in he had made such a blunder Pain would occur, although the target unclear Until Bane interjected with CIA's biggest fear For when told he was a big guy, Bane responded with glee That CIA feeling glum is how it would be Then it was revealed that the capture was intended And CIA's flight plane would need to be amended But then from behind, another plane appeared in the distance with Bane adding that he needed Pavel's assistance CIA's dismissal of Bane's success because his source of dreaded distress The plan was to crash, with all on board Presents and all, with Bane's freedom restored So Bane sprang from his seat, to his team gave a shout, And down they all slid into his masterplanned rout But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he rose out of sight, "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"
File: dr "m claus.jpg (442 KB, 1229x683) Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)18:59:08 No.207294575 ► Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the plane Not a creature was stirring, not even Bane The flight plan was filed with the agency with care CIA knowing the hostages wouldn't all reach there The prisoners were kneeling with bags on their heads With visions of sleighbells and crashing sleds And CIA in his polo, and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap When out on the clouds there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the seat to see what was the matter. Away to the aisle I flew like a flash, Tore open the seatbelt and turned in a dash After shouting and shooting, and questions of Bane One interrupted Wilson, with self-satisfied disdain When, what, from under a hood should appear, But a man, with a mask, and soon it was clear Bigger than average, but still under detain, I knew in a moment it must have been Bane More rapid than eagles CIA's surprise came, And he pointed, and shouted, and called him by name "Bane?" he gasped, with shock and surprise As he realised his flightplan hadn't included this guise How vital was the mask, CIA began to wonder When it would soon sink in he had made such a blunder Pain would occur, although the target unclear Until Bane interjected with CIA's biggest fear For when told he was a big guy, Bane responded with glee That CIA feeling glum is how it would be Then it was revealed that the capture was intended And CIA's flight plane would need to be amended But then from behind, another plane appeared in the distance with Bane adding that he needed Pavel's assistance CIA's dismissal of Bane's success because his source of dreaded distress The plan was to crash, with all on board Presents and all, with Bane's freedom restored So Bane sprang from his seat, to his team gave a shout, And down they all slid into his masterplanned rout But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he rose out of sight, "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

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Outskilled | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/22/24(Sun)08:00:36 No.698041706 POT OF GRID POT OF GREED Por OF GREED Pot of GREED PUT OF GREED Por OF GREED POT OF GREEDY POT OF GREED POT OF G POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED Pot of GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GR POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF CRIED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED Por or GED Pot of GRUD POT OF GLED Pot of GREED PUT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED 1724880407753.jpg 647 KB JPG How do you respond without being mad?
Anonymous 12/22/24(Sun)08:00:36 No.698041706 POT OF GRID POT OF GREED Por OF GREED Pot of GREED PUT OF GREED Por OF GREED POT OF GREEDY POT OF GREED POT OF G POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED Pot of GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GR POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF CRIED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED Por or GED Pot of GRUD POT OF GLED Pot of GREED PUT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED 1724880407753.jpg 647 KB JPG How do you respond without being mad?

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Brazilian Anon presents the theory of Latin American superiority | /r/Greentext

onymous (ID: SfcfHovR 7 KB JPG 12/24/24(Tue)14:30:28 No.492241094 The Latin American Superiority Theory >doesn't have as beautiful a model as Colombian Sara Salazar >there are no fantastic women like Brazilians Bruna Butterfly or Juliana Soares >or more recently Sayuri Mattar and Hotsolzinha >doesn't have a woman as beautiful as Chilean Melanie Scarleth Beauty is Latin American
onymous (ID: SfcfHovR 7 KB JPG 12/24/24(Tue)14:30:28 No.492241094 The Latin American Superiority Theory >doesn't have as beautiful a model as Colombian Sara Salazar >there are no fantastic women like Brazilians Bruna Butterfly or Juliana Soares >or more recently Sayuri Mattar and Hotsolzinha >doesn't have a woman as beautiful as Chilean Melanie Scarleth Beauty is Latin American

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Anon drives | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/11/24(Wed)10:34:37 No.505685281 238 KB JPG >buy new racing vidya >launch it >immediately jump into a multiplayer race without doing any tutorials or any singleplayer races or anything >race starts >go backwards ramming everyone just kidding, i don't actually do this but it would be really funny if i did
Anonymous 12/11/24(Wed)10:34:37 No.505685281 238 KB JPG >buy new racing vidya >launch it >immediately jump into a multiplayer race without doing any tutorials or any singleplayer races or anything >race starts >go backwards ramming everyone just kidding, i don't actually do this but it would be really funny if i did

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Anon wishes everyone a Merry Christmas! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)11:41:06 No.698215275 Merry Christmas you guys Peace on earth and goodwill towards men >>698215853 # Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)11:50:30 No.698215658 >>698220325 # >>698220875 # >>698229275 # Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)11:50:58 No.698215687 >>698229579 # Anonymous 1.22 MB GIF >>698216409 # 12/24/24(Tue)11:55:16 No.698215853 >>698215275 # what about women?
Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)11:41:06 No.698215275 Merry Christmas you guys Peace on earth and goodwill towards men >>698215853 # Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)11:50:30 No.698215658 >>698220325 # >>698220875 # >>698229275 # Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)11:50:58 No.698215687 >>698229579 # Anonymous 1.22 MB GIF >>698216409 # 12/24/24(Tue)11:55:16 No.698215853 >>698215275 # what about women?

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OP got a reality check | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 502 KB JPG 06/06/21(Sun)00:12:09 No.558399151 >two armies meet after much anticipation >end game finale, supposed to be a major battle of epic proportions > Literally just a group of 4-6 people shooting at each other Name a bigger let down Anonymous >name a bigger letdown Okay. 06/06/21(Sun)00:13:12 No.558399243 >Spend 9 months carrying child >spend 25 years raising it >it turns out to be OP >>558399530 # >>558399565 # >>558399640 # >>558399869 # >>558399959 # >>558400048 # >>558400059 # >>558400187 # >>558400321 # >>558400648 # >>558400685 # >>558400710 # >>558402545 # >>558402651 #>>558402682 # >>558402792 # >>558403595 # >>558403614 # >>558404184 # >>558404687 # >>558404880 # >>558405015 # >>558406015 #1
Anonymous 502 KB JPG 06/06/21(Sun)00:12:09 No.558399151 >two armies meet after much anticipation >end game finale, supposed to be a major battle of epic proportions > Literally just a group of 4-6 people shooting at each other Name a bigger let down Anonymous >name a bigger letdown Okay. 06/06/21(Sun)00:13:12 No.558399243 >Spend 9 months carrying child >spend 25 years raising it >it turns out to be OP >>558399530 # >>558399565 # >>558399640 # >>558399869 # >>558399959 # >>558400048 # >>558400059 # >>558400187 # >>558400321 # >>558400648 # >>558400685 # >>558400710 # >>558402545 # >>558402651 #>>558402682 # >>558402792 # >>558403595 # >>558403614 # >>558404184 # >>558404687 # >>558404880 # >>558405015 # >>558406015 #1

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Anon and Star Wars Canon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous STAR WARS 134 KB JPG more than once. 02/22/24(Thu)17:47:30 No.142373521 >"Legends was never canon. Lucas was barely involved in it at all and would've reconned it all eventually regardless." >But the Sequel Trilogy had no involvement from Lucas at all. >"That was after Disney bought Star Wars. Everything Disney makes us canon." >But Disney canon has reconned itself >"That's because the books and shows are lesser canon". >So the OT, PT, and Clone Wars were greater canon before the buyout with Legends being lesser canon then? >"No! Legends was never canon!" >Can we at least agree Legends is higher quality than the Sequel Trilogy? >"This has nothing to do with quality! It has to do with canon!" How is it that almost every conversation about Legends vs Canon online ends up devolving into this idiotic loop? Do people actually think like this or is this just some standard botted reply?
Anonymous STAR WARS 134 KB JPG more than once. 02/22/24(Thu)17:47:30 No.142373521 >"Legends was never canon. Lucas was barely involved in it at all and would've reconned it all eventually regardless." >But the Sequel Trilogy had no involvement from Lucas at all. >"That was after Disney bought Star Wars. Everything Disney makes us canon." >But Disney canon has reconned itself >"That's because the books and shows are lesser canon". >So the OT, PT, and Clone Wars were greater canon before the buyout with Legends being lesser canon then? >"No! Legends was never canon!" >Can we at least agree Legends is higher quality than the Sequel Trilogy? >"This has nothing to do with quality! It has to do with canon!" How is it that almost every conversation about Legends vs Canon online ends up devolving into this idiotic loop? Do people actually think like this or is this just some standard botted reply?

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Anon is from medieval times | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1.32 MB JPG 12/06/24 (Fri)08:27:10 No.32407586 >first date of my entire life >prettiest girl ever, so I go to pay and pull out my bag of coins >she leaves instantly Are woman to good for the coin Really I felt the embarrassment when everyone was saw me paying with coins, I really don't see how this is a bad thing
Anonymous 1.32 MB JPG 12/06/24 (Fri)08:27:10 No.32407586 >first date of my entire life >prettiest girl ever, so I go to pay and pull out my bag of coins >she leaves instantly Are woman to good for the coin Really I felt the embarrassment when everyone was saw me paying with coins, I really don't see how this is a bad thing

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Anon realizes there's no original stories anymore | /r/Greentext

>>274357506 >>274357575 >>274357714 >>274363294 Anonymous 12/22/24(Sun)13:59:14 No.274356082 File: ems.jpg (553 KB, 1400x2100) RUDOLPH >>274355576 >kicked out of the party >my weakest skill was actually the STRONGEST >tags: regret
>>274357506 >>274357575 >>274357714 >>274363294 Anonymous 12/22/24(Sun)13:59:14 No.274356082 File: ems.jpg (553 KB, 1400x2100) RUDOLPH >>274355576 >kicked out of the party >my weakest skill was actually the STRONGEST >tags: regret

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Anon gets a massage | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 477 KB GIF 11/05/23(Sun)15:35:13 No.75311559 >be me, 30 year old khv wizard >Back-and-shoulders day at the gym, working out with a much younger coworker (22) who asked for my help to get in shape >coworker offers lunch at his house after we get done, I take him up on it >when we get there he introduces me to his wife, very pleasant young woman, she makes a lunch for us >coworker asks me to stay to watch football, I agree to >his wife asks how things are going at the gym, she thanks me for helping him out >realize this is the first positive thing a woman has said to me in a long time >during the game, coworker sits on the floor in front of his wife who sits on the couch and massages his shoulders >coworker notices me staring >I say It must be nice to have a free masseuse >they laugh and she says Come here, your turn >I try to say no, but neither of them will have any of that and the coworker practically drags me over to sit on the floor in front of his wife >she begins to rub my shoulders and I am not exaggerating when I tell you it was the most pleasurable physical experiences I have ever felt, this is the first time that a woman has touched me with gentleness >Struck by an intense wave of depression as I realize that my younger coworker has figured out how to convince a woman to touch him gently at 22 while I am f------ 30 years old and still cannot even figure out how to get a woman to go on a date with me. >My coworker has figured out how not to be a lonely man at 22 and I am a 30 year old man who has never even kissed a girl >actually start crying and stand up to leave >both of them ask me what is wrong and try to keep me from leaving >I just keep saying I am sorry and run out to my car, feel deep shame as I watch them stare at me sobbing in my car as I back out of their driveway and speed off >coworker texts me asking me to call him when I can I hate myself so much, I cannot stand it. I bore witness to a life literally a hundred times better than my own and it broke me.
Anonymous 477 KB GIF 11/05/23(Sun)15:35:13 No.75311559 >be me, 30 year old khv wizard >Back-and-shoulders day at the gym, working out with a much younger coworker (22) who asked for my help to get in shape >coworker offers lunch at his house after we get done, I take him up on it >when we get there he introduces me to his wife, very pleasant young woman, she makes a lunch for us >coworker asks me to stay to watch football, I agree to >his wife asks how things are going at the gym, she thanks me for helping him out >realize this is the first positive thing a woman has said to me in a long time >during the game, coworker sits on the floor in front of his wife who sits on the couch and massages his shoulders >coworker notices me staring >I say It must be nice to have a free masseuse >they laugh and she says Come here, your turn >I try to say no, but neither of them will have any of that and the coworker practically drags me over to sit on the floor in front of his wife >she begins to rub my shoulders and I am not exaggerating when I tell you it was the most pleasurable physical experiences I have ever felt, this is the first time that a woman has touched me with gentleness >Struck by an intense wave of depression as I realize that my younger coworker has figured out how to convince a woman to touch him gently at 22 while I am f------ 30 years old and still cannot even figure out how to get a woman to go on a date with me. >My coworker has figured out how not to be a lonely man at 22 and I am a 30 year old man who has never even kissed a girl >actually start crying and stand up to leave >both of them ask me what is wrong and try to keep me from leaving >I just keep saying I am sorry and run out to my car, feel deep shame as I watch them stare at me sobbing in my car as I back out of their driveway and speed off >coworker texts me asking me to call him when I can I hate myself so much, I cannot stand it. I bore witness to a life literally a hundred times better than my own and it broke me.

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Which way warrior? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon) 16:24:35 No.698170907 swords.jpg 274 KB JPG >two swords >sword and shield >big sword which way, warrior man?
Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon) 16:24:35 No.698170907 swords.jpg 274 KB JPG >two swords >sword and shield >big sword which way, warrior man?

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Redditors really are dumb | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 899 KB PNG >be me 09/21/23(Thu)09:50:15 No.15760341 >browsing plebbit r/Am/TheAsshole >see a post titled "would I be the a------ for giving my wife my old Airpods" >why the f< would that make anybody the a------ >post is about a 40 year old man who got a new pair of airpods for free so he wants to give his wife his old pair >says her birthday is coming up and he got her a couple other gifts and would it be weird if he gave her the old pair instead of the new one >man is absolutely blasted in the comments >people call him disgusting, selfish, creepy, arrogant >some femoid goes off screaming about how everyone always ignores women's birthdays >another dude points out the man got his wife other birthday gifts and is downvoted into oblivion >several people say this marriage sounds like it's headed for divorce >have idea >literally copy the post word for word, change genders and ages so that it's an 18yo girl asking if she can give her 20yo boyfriend the headphones >votes roll in, 95% not the a------ >guys saying "you would be spoiling him too much" >guys saying "you already got him other gifts why not keep both pairs of headphones" >guys saying fake boyfriend is creepy for dating "someone so young AND expecting fancy gifts" >just as expected >close plebbit and thank god that i'm not a soyboy Man, no wonder people hate redditors
Anonymous 899 KB PNG >be me 09/21/23(Thu)09:50:15 No.15760341 >browsing plebbit r/Am/TheAsshole >see a post titled "would I be the a------ for giving my wife my old Airpods" >why the f< would that make anybody the a------ >post is about a 40 year old man who got a new pair of airpods for free so he wants to give his wife his old pair >says her birthday is coming up and he got her a couple other gifts and would it be weird if he gave her the old pair instead of the new one >man is absolutely blasted in the comments >people call him disgusting, selfish, creepy, arrogant >some femoid goes off screaming about how everyone always ignores women's birthdays >another dude points out the man got his wife other birthday gifts and is downvoted into oblivion >several people say this marriage sounds like it's headed for divorce >have idea >literally copy the post word for word, change genders and ages so that it's an 18yo girl asking if she can give her 20yo boyfriend the headphones >votes roll in, 95% not the a------ >guys saying "you would be spoiling him too much" >guys saying "you already got him other gifts why not keep both pairs of headphones" >guys saying fake boyfriend is creepy for dating "someone so young AND expecting fancy gifts" >just as expected >close plebbit and thank god that i'm not a soyboy Man, no wonder people hate redditors

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Average Brazilian on /co/ | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon)13:35:55 No.146871119 Did you draw any of your favorite characters today? 706 KB PNG Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon) 13:37:00 No.146871131 i dont think ive drawn since i was about 15, i wasnt that good anyways and i just tried to draw women like ophellia or some s--- Anonymous >>146871119 (OP) # 12/23/24(Mon) 13:39:42 No.146871160 I'm too scared it'll look bad >>146871191 # Anonymous >>146871119 (OP) # 12/23/24(Mon)13:40:21 No.146871166 Technically, yes. I drew Buzz Buzzard sitting on a locker room bench while a brazilian vulture soccer mascot sniffs his armpit
Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon)13:35:55 No.146871119 Did you draw any of your favorite characters today? 706 KB PNG Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon) 13:37:00 No.146871131 i dont think ive drawn since i was about 15, i wasnt that good anyways and i just tried to draw women like ophellia or some s--- Anonymous >>146871119 (OP) # 12/23/24(Mon) 13:39:42 No.146871160 I'm too scared it'll look bad >>146871191 # Anonymous >>146871119 (OP) # 12/23/24(Mon)13:40:21 No.146871166 Technically, yes. I drew Buzz Buzzard sitting on a locker room bench while a brazilian vulture soccer mascot sniffs his armpit

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Anon meets a girl | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)10:12:24 No.72396754 69 KB JPG >meet girl in uni work group >ultra broken english with a strong russian accent, cute >talk about video games and go out together a few times >invite me over to her place >hellyes >arrive at her place, she lets me in >her pets (a prussian blue and rottweiler) come after hearing me at the door >"Those are my pets, kat and dog!" >no s---? >"What are they called?" >she gets the biggest s----eating grin imaginable >she points at the cat "He is Dog" >wut.jpg >then she points at the dog "She is Kat" >about to correct her as she's giggling >"It's short for Katarina and Douglas" She's the one, bros.
Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)10:12:24 No.72396754 69 KB JPG >meet girl in uni work group >ultra broken english with a strong russian accent, cute >talk about video games and go out together a few times >invite me over to her place >hellyes >arrive at her place, she lets me in >her pets (a prussian blue and rottweiler) come after hearing me at the door >"Those are my pets, kat and dog!" >no s---? >"What are they called?" >she gets the biggest s----eating grin imaginable >she points at the cat "He is Dog" >wut.jpg >then she points at the dog "She is Kat" >about to correct her as she's giggling >"It's short for Katarina and Douglas" She's the one, bros.

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/co/ sings a song | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon)14:40:34 No.146871728 vlcsnap-2024-12-23-13h39m38s805.png 2.14 MB PNG ZIPPITY DOO DAH ZIPPITY AY PRUNING GOOD THREADS MEANS THE JANNIES ARE GAY ⠀ Anonymous >>146871728 (OP) # 12/23/24(Mon)14:53:18 No.146871872 Plenty of Coombait, and a fetish charcuteries, autisimy do dah, OP is a gay! Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon) 14:54:24 No.146871882 Xitter screenshots on my Blue Board, it's ragebait, it's fake and gay, it's overall homosexual!
Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon)14:40:34 No.146871728 vlcsnap-2024-12-23-13h39m38s805.png 2.14 MB PNG ZIPPITY DOO DAH ZIPPITY AY PRUNING GOOD THREADS MEANS THE JANNIES ARE GAY ⠀ Anonymous >>146871728 (OP) # 12/23/24(Mon)14:53:18 No.146871872 Plenty of Coombait, and a fetish charcuteries, autisimy do dah, OP is a gay! Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon) 14:54:24 No.146871882 Xitter screenshots on my Blue Board, it's ragebait, it's fake and gay, it's overall homosexual!

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Anon is depressed & actually sad | /r/Greentext

Why wasn't I told life is over after 30? Why wasn't I told life is over(...) 12/23/24(Mon)04:44:05 No.21789638 It only hurts when I think 53 KB JPG >34 soon >havent enjoyed my life since 25ish >no friends, sex, or social life beyond hookers since 2018 >have dreams about being at a party in HS/College and then wake up alone in my 123sq ft apartment and get ready for work >can no longer hide behind youthful, plausible deniability about why you're alone and haven't "figured things out" >see peers with partners and children and feel weird and sad like a rotten adult infant >too old and social media retarded to participate in youth culture >can tell father is embarrassed, disappointed, and had disassociated from me to preserve his mental health. This is a slow motion nightmare
Why wasn't I told life is over after 30? Why wasn't I told life is over(...) 12/23/24(Mon)04:44:05 No.21789638 It only hurts when I think 53 KB JPG >34 soon >havent enjoyed my life since 25ish >no friends, sex, or social life beyond hookers since 2018 >have dreams about being at a party in HS/College and then wake up alone in my 123sq ft apartment and get ready for work >can no longer hide behind youthful, plausible deniability about why you're alone and haven't "figured things out" >see peers with partners and children and feel weird and sad like a rotten adult infant >too old and social media retarded to participate in youth culture >can tell father is embarrassed, disappointed, and had disassociated from me to preserve his mental health. This is a slow motion nightmare

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>Le average AITAH post | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 899 KB PNG >be me 09/21/23(Thu)09:50:15 No.15760341 >browsing plebbit r/Am/TheAsshole >see a post titled "would I be the a------ for giving my wife my old Airpods" >why the f < would that make anybody the a------ >post is about a 40 year old man who got a new pair of airpods for free so he wants to give his wife his old pair >says her birthday is coming up and he got her a couple other gifts and would it be weird if he gave her the old pair instead of the new one >man is absolutely blasted in the comments >people call him disgusting, selfish, creepy, arrogant >some femoid goes off screaming about how everyone always ignores women's birthdays >another dude points out the man got his wife other birthday gifts and is downvoted into oblivion >several people say this marriage sounds like it's headed for divorce >have idea >literally copy the post word for word, change genders and ages so that it's an 18yo girl asking if she can give her 20yo boyfriend the headphones >votes roll in, 95% not the a------ >guys saying "you would be spoiling him too much" >guys saying "you already got him other gifts why not keep both pairs of headphones" >guys saying fake boyfriend is creepy for dating "someone so young AND expecting fancy gifts" >just as expected >close plebbit and thank god that i'm not a soyboy Man, no wonder people hate redditors
Anonymous 899 KB PNG >be me 09/21/23(Thu)09:50:15 No.15760341 >browsing plebbit r/Am/TheAsshole >see a post titled "would I be the a------ for giving my wife my old Airpods" >why the f < would that make anybody the a------ >post is about a 40 year old man who got a new pair of airpods for free so he wants to give his wife his old pair >says her birthday is coming up and he got her a couple other gifts and would it be weird if he gave her the old pair instead of the new one >man is absolutely blasted in the comments >people call him disgusting, selfish, creepy, arrogant >some femoid goes off screaming about how everyone always ignores women's birthdays >another dude points out the man got his wife other birthday gifts and is downvoted into oblivion >several people say this marriage sounds like it's headed for divorce >have idea >literally copy the post word for word, change genders and ages so that it's an 18yo girl asking if she can give her 20yo boyfriend the headphones >votes roll in, 95% not the a------ >guys saying "you would be spoiling him too much" >guys saying "you already got him other gifts why not keep both pairs of headphones" >guys saying fake boyfriend is creepy for dating "someone so young AND expecting fancy gifts" >just as expected >close plebbit and thank god that i'm not a soyboy Man, no wonder people hate redditors

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Anon must be a Joo | /r/Greentext

Eric Roberts cca may 84 KB JPG also into finance >Be me, 23M >Hardcore finance nerd >Go through company financials day and night like an autist, deciding where to invest >Eventually grew a portfolio in the 7 figures within a few years >Go on a date with a chick who is >mid conversation, she mentions that she sold all her shares in tesla and starbucks due to their low ESG scores >eventually ends up asking me what I have in my portfolio >Lockheed Martin, General Dynamic, Exxon Mobil, Royal Dutch Shell, Phillip Morris, Imperial Brands, Anheuser Busch, Heineken, Wells Fargo, JP Morgan >She seems visibly uncomfortable >in an attempt to change the topic, she asks me what car I drive >1984 Toyota Hilux >She gets up and leaves
Eric Roberts cca may 84 KB JPG also into finance >Be me, 23M >Hardcore finance nerd >Go through company financials day and night like an autist, deciding where to invest >Eventually grew a portfolio in the 7 figures within a few years >Go on a date with a chick who is >mid conversation, she mentions that she sold all her shares in tesla and starbucks due to their low ESG scores >eventually ends up asking me what I have in my portfolio >Lockheed Martin, General Dynamic, Exxon Mobil, Royal Dutch Shell, Phillip Morris, Imperial Brands, Anheuser Busch, Heineken, Wells Fargo, JP Morgan >She seems visibly uncomfortable >in an attempt to change the topic, she asks me what car I drive >1984 Toyota Hilux >She gets up and leaves

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Anon makes a theory of the third world war | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 00VZK+5c 12/23/24(Mon)02:39:15 No.492120665 >>492119633 # Checked >Trump invades Greenland >EU condemns, declares war >Tough guy Trudeau declares war for Canada >NATO dissolves >Ukraine collapses overnight >Trump-Putin alliance formed >Europoors freeze to death when Russian energy cut off and HAARP blots out the sun for months >Trump stages false flag with Mexico >Trump takes Canada >Trump takes Mexico >Trump takes Greenland >Kim joins Trump-Putin alliance >Kim volunteers to sacrifice North Korea for Trump, his only true friend in the world >Kim nukes China >10 million 4" penised 4' North Koreans rush the border >B63 nuclear bombs annihilate China's pacific coast >w----- uprising >Belt & Road is over >SATAN-2s annihilate Israel >Trump annihilates South Korea, unifies the peninsula under Kim's heir Kim jong bing bong >Putin reforms renewed USSR >Superpowers keep each other in check >World peace except in Africa which becomes a hunting ground for racists >N------ shot from trains like buffalo >World peace
Anonymous (ID: 00VZK+5c 12/23/24(Mon)02:39:15 No.492120665 >>492119633 # Checked >Trump invades Greenland >EU condemns, declares war >Tough guy Trudeau declares war for Canada >NATO dissolves >Ukraine collapses overnight >Trump-Putin alliance formed >Europoors freeze to death when Russian energy cut off and HAARP blots out the sun for months >Trump stages false flag with Mexico >Trump takes Canada >Trump takes Mexico >Trump takes Greenland >Kim joins Trump-Putin alliance >Kim volunteers to sacrifice North Korea for Trump, his only true friend in the world >Kim nukes China >10 million 4" penised 4' North Koreans rush the border >B63 nuclear bombs annihilate China's pacific coast >w----- uprising >Belt & Road is over >SATAN-2s annihilate Israel >Trump annihilates South Korea, unifies the peninsula under Kim's heir Kim jong bing bong >Putin reforms renewed USSR >Superpowers keep each other in check >World peace except in Africa which becomes a hunting ground for racists >N------ shot from trains like buffalo >World peace

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Anon defends Manifest Destiny | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: UKjwOUZC 12/23/24(Mon)01:46:14 No.492118209 >>492116906 (OP) # >INVADE GREENLAND >INVADE CANADA >INVADE MEXICO >INVADE CUBA LETS F------ GO BOIS WE WILL TAKE WHAT IS OUR RIGHT BY MANIFEST DESTINY >>492118379 # >>492118834 #
Anonymous (ID: UKjwOUZC 12/23/24(Mon)01:46:14 No.492118209 >>492116906 (OP) # >INVADE GREENLAND >INVADE CANADA >INVADE MEXICO >INVADE CUBA LETS F------ GO BOIS WE WILL TAKE WHAT IS OUR RIGHT BY MANIFEST DESTINY >>492118379 # >>492118834 #

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