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WE'RE OFF TO SEE THE LIZARD DEPT. As we saw from the recent Godzilla movie and from the 847 Godzilla movies that preceded it he is one tough lizard to put down! Invariably, humanity attacks the beast with missiles, torpedoes and bombs, but none of them ever do much damage. So the next time Godzilla stomps up out of the ocean, the good guys should just kick back and use these... EASY WAYS TO DEFEAT GODZILLA INTRODUCE HIM TO THE AVERAGE AMERICAN DIET. IN NO TIME HELL BE TOO FAT AND LETHARGIC TO DESTROY ANYTHING. AIR-DROP AN ENORMOUS WIDE-SCREEN TELEVISION COMPLETE WITH FREE NETFLIX NEAR HIM. HE'LL SPEND THE NEXT TEN YEARS BINGE-WATCHING TV SHOWS. INSTEAD OF ATTACKING WITH BATTLESHIPS, SEND A FLEET OF CARNIVAL CRUISE SHIPS AFTER HIM. SOON AFTER EATING THEM, HE'LL BE VOMITING AND SICK WITH DIARRHEA. DISPATCH DENNIS RODMAN AS AN UNOFFICIAL U.S. AMBASSADOR TO REASON WITH HIM. Yo, bro, have you ever thought about playing basketball? I bet you could shut down LeBron! REGRETFULLY INFORM HIM THAT HIS JOB HAS BEEN OUTSOURCED TO A CHEAPER MONSTER FROM INDIA. PINK SLIP HAVE PRESIDENT OBAMA INTRODUCE A CONGRESSIONAL BILL SUPPORTING AN ATTACK BY GODZILLA, WHICH WILL ENSURE THAT REPUBLICANS IN THE HOUSE AND SENATE WILL STOP AT NOTHING TO DEFEAT IT. MAKE SURE DETROIT IS THE FIRST AMERICAN CITY HE SEES. HE'LL ASSUME THE U.S. HAS ALREADY BEEN DESTROYED BY SOME OTHER MONSTER AND ATTACK CANADA INSTEAD. ORANGE BLACK u Jork BOEHNER DECLA ALL-OUT WAR ON OBAMAZILLA WRITER MIKE MORSE ARTIST HERMANN MEJIA ONTARIO 27

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7 ways to defeat Godzilla


Uploaded by KimmyDude Jun 21, 2023 at 12:00AM EDT

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Origin Entry: Godzilla

File type: jpg

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AT HERE IS WHERE YOU DIE. ALL OF YOU. 7:15 LOL コスモス ARE MERELY NESSING THE RISING... 444 ...NOT THE FALL. NO 21 DR. YUKO HONDA WE COME TO YOU NOW IN OUR GREATEST HOUR OF NEED. GREATEST HOUR OF NEED.
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221 views (2 from today)

Uploaded Jun 21, 2023 at 12:00AM EDT

Origin Entry

Godzilla

Tags

mad magazine, godzilla 2014

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