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deanprincesster-deactivated2017 professor is 6 mins late to first class ayyyy deanprincesster so ten minutes after class was supposed to start someone throws a book at the whiteboard and everyone goes silent as this guy in a baseball cap leaps over his desk to the front of the room and says "I guess we can start class now. we're gonna start by talking about my favorite subject: me" my professor is a really young dude and disguised himself as a student

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that happened stories lying fake

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Comments 3.5K 笑い続ける = X Х 1 month ago (edited) My sister called me a weeb. I stole her phone and changed her ringtone to this. I then proceeded to call her while she was talking to her crush. Update: Her crush was a bit freaked out of her ringtone and proceeded to just stay friends, mission accomplished 1.7K 目 57

when i got in a car crash and called my dad right away and he just said "skill issue" and hung up 5572 18 810

Extendalk just went out wearing my 1920s clothing and heard a girl ask her mom if i was a ghost to which her mom replied "no, i think thats just a lesbian" Х 68.2K 564 4294

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Donut Shop Drama

Comment on "When Karens Mess With The Wrong People.." @tm8747. 2 weeks ago the donut drive thru, i had a problem with a karen running her mouth and telling everyone to shut up. as she got of her car and left her car running, i simple walked over to her car and placed it in drive, and the car did the rest!, it drove across a street and hit the curb across the road and stopped, in my time i got my order and so did everyone else, in line, the police rolled up, the donut shop told what happen and they arrested her FOR LEAVING A RUNNING CAR IN A DRIVE THRU. THE DONUT SHOP OWNER TOLD ON A LATER DAY, THAT THE COPS WANTED TO SHAKE MY HAND FOR WHAT I DID STUPID IS STUPID. 目 2 2 ⠀

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What

Back in the 70's I couldn't get a student loan because I didn't meet the criteria for affirmative action (too pale). I was going to be a doctor (and have the mind for it - IQ over 160 & remember everything I've read). So I ended up going into poverty instead for about a dozen years. And society ended up losing what my own doctors say would have made a good doctor. 3d Like Reply 7509

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Really?

THE ATF C 2mo ago (edited) I Open Carry EVERY SINGLE DAY. The best situation I ever had was when an elderly woman approached me in the grocery store and said "I want to thank you for open carrying in here today. I feel so much safer." So I abandoned my cart and took over hers and said "Let me escort you in your shopping today." Walking and talking with her in the grocery store made my day. I have actually met you while Open Carrying in Fort Worth. Thigh rig, full retention holster. 97

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Actual Doctor Said This

Today at 4:33 PM yeah last time i was at the doctors office the doctor was like "holy you're so tall and shredded" and i was like yeah i get that a lot and he was like "no seriously you're a genetic freak dude sick gains im a doctor" and i was like yeah cool man thanks

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good for you

Posts Photos Bless these sweet guys at H.E.B. Guess there is hope... Cashier: Ma'am may I see your ID please? Me: Sure! Life events Smart kid. : Cashier: uh, Holy I'm so sorry to cuss in front of you ma'am. But that's NOT the year or age i was thinking i would see. I thought you were about 25. No disrespect. Shows the Guy Bagging: What?!! No way!! Me: y'all are sweet. But yes, it's true. Cashier: well, keep doin what you're doin. Or thank your family for good genes. (Best Spring Break Ever ●●● €

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Incredible

+3+ 52m In high school I was the most popular kid there and i was a huge stoner. Anyways I was in the back of class and I smoked probably class to an ounce and was blowing it out the window until the teacher noticed smoking smelling and he came to me right as I was hitting my joint and i held it in and he kept an eye on me the rest of class. I held my breath for 9 minutes straight and the second he looking away I blew it out the window. The cute girl sitting next to was so impressed she asked to smoke with me so I took her home and we smoked and then had sex. I pounded her for like 3 hours and she came atleast 20 times. Man high schoo was awesome for me. 40+ 0↓

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@ I had a guy try mugging me this morning with a tiny pocket knife. So I Just reached behind my trench coat and unsheathed my sword. And he Immediately pocketed his knife and said he made a mistake targeting me Imao. These people. 3 go

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Dr. 15 February 2020 MD Real conversation today. Obstetrician: This baby looks really amazing. How old are you again Dr. P Me: Almost 42. Me: Obstetrician: This is truly amazing. What in the world are you taking? Me: My inventions. Boston C, Lightning in a Bottle, Megadose Vitamin C, Pixie Dust Magnesium and Doctor's Shake. Obstetrician: Do you mind if I start prescribing those to my patients? ... General Freq 6.0M Depth 7.0cm Sector 100% Gain 50% FrRate High FPS 40Hz Dyn 80dB Persist 3 Map 4 Chroma 0 Power 0 MI<0.68 Clarity Med

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Sure

i I was stopped 5 times today being told to go back to class.. a kid also mistaken me for a peer guess I'm aging well that I can still be mistaken for a middle and high schooler Pout wh B diloar ав slas tam

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Punctuation free

am I wrong for punching somebody Alright I know the title looks bad but hear me out I am 26 years old and I have a 6 year old son and I take my son everywhere except my work I went to a park and I was on my phone and my son came over to me crying saying that's so mean lady was trying to take his robot toy I went up to her she says is this the little brat who will not give my son his toy back I say that is my son's toy and she can't just take it she was like ugh give my son your toy my son says no and she slaps my son saying listen give my son your toy you little bitch and then she slaps me and get super p----- then she takes my son's toy then she spit at my son I couldn't control myself after that so I punch her she says how dare you and I pointed at my camera on my chest she turned as white as a ghost then she took her kid and ran after she tripped over a rock and I took my son to get ice cream so am I wrong for punching somebody

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so true

Me, talking about how in Breath Of The Wild there is no set path and you can do whatever you want and it's intimidating to me. Levi: Yeah, well you play that type of game everyday. It's called life. Thank you 8 year old

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+1

That Happened - College is Crazy

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deanprincesster-deactivated2017 professor is 6 mins late to first class ayyyy deanprincesster so ten minutes after class was supposed to start someone throws a book at the whiteboard and everyone goes silent as this guy in a baseball cap leaps over his desk to the front of the room and says "I guess we can start class now. we're gonna start by talking about my favorite subject: me" my professor is a really young dude and disguised himself as a student

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