Ben Weston @BenWest69113235 If the sun is in space... why is there light on earth but not in space MESSAGES illuminati STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE. now ***

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j. @justinbxrnard no matter how small you try to make that "unsubscribe" at the bottom of an email, I WILL FIND IT

Anosognosiogenesis @pookleblinky Every cop show: d this serial killer is crafty, very smart and sneaky Every true crime podcast: despite dozens of complaints from neighbors, it took over a year for police to investigate the source of the foul odor

Kris P. Bacon @KrisWolfheart kids today are missing out of the pre-streaming era, where your childhood was at least partially defined by some semi-obscure movie your family just happened to own on tape and you watched several dozen times

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j. @justinbxrnard no matter how small you try to make that "unsubscribe" at the bottom of an email, I WILL FIND IT

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Box

Gina Lloyd @GinaGoes Outside I love unhinged pet names bestowed by children. my parents got us a pair of kittens when I was a toddler and only knew a handful of words so then we had a cat named Box for almost 20 years

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Weeee

`eli / follow limit @sakoorku i just accidentally flushed one of my airpods down the toilet now im watching it move through the pipes on apple maps

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Hang in there

bigestaban @bigestaban hang in there fellas, only a few more weeks until Christmas

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Please... stop...

me at 3am reading all 264 comments of 2 strangers arguing online georgie @BeefyGorilla There's nothing worse than watching the one you're rooting for become cringe

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He didn't lie

Donny Electric @DonnyElectric I saw my boy across the bar tell some girl he "travels for work"... that man delivers pizza

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Goals

Ygrene @Ygrene Hope that when I retire I can come back to the office, like many athletes do for their sports, as a commentator- just absolutely critiquing every spreadsheet entry, google slide, and co-worker interaction

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Goofy

h @chibbed out for dinner with my bf and mid- convo he's absolutely not listening to me but looking longingly at another table making mad in love eyes so I turn around and afwhite labradoodle is locked in a trance with him

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It's the small things

Brunette Bohemian @Jane_Doe82 Saw two dads share a dad joke out in the wild. At a grocery store, two guys exchanging a cart. The guy taking the cart said "did ya put some gas in it?" And the other guy patted the cart and said "yep, filled 'er up for ya" and they had a good little chuckle together

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That's rough

Sassparilla @Megatronic13 My 4-yr old was sitting on my lap and she felt the baby kick her in the back. She immediately started. crying about the baby kicking her. This baby isn't even born and they are already fighting. God help me.

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Good to be alone

Tarek Ali @itstarekali + > I think my love with being alone stems from me knowing if I'm alone then no one is around to disturb me or alter any of my emotions. Everything is up to me. no one is there to misunderstand me, judge me, etc. It's peaceful. A peace I don't feel often with other humans

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I get it

Henpecked Hal @Henpecked Hal Last night my seven year old asked to go to bed about 20 minutes before her normal bedtime. "Are you sleepy?" I asked. She said, "I'm not tired, I'm just tired of being awake," and brother, I felt those words in my bones.

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Ben Weston @BenWest69113235 If the sun is in space... why is there light on earth but not in space MESSAGES illuminati STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE. now ***

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Uploaded Dec 08, 2024 at 01:20PM EST

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