Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) - Now It's Time For… THAT IS NOT WHAT YOU SAID MEANS: Debunking Myths on Gimmick Words

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Anonymous 03/07/15(Sat) 10:11:32 No.286006183 >286005478 (OP) Time to brush up on those E3 buzzwords, and what they actually mean > Suspenseful = Jumpscares >Cinematic By-the-numbers drivel >Innovative = Mundane > Competetive = we want the E-sports crowd > Inspired By = Borderline copyright infringing upon >$59.99 worth $20 tops >Deluxe Edition = One additional skin > Pre-order Now! = Recouping costs before reviews hit > Diversity = we want the tumblr crowd > Exclusive = Multiplat / GOTY edition in 6 months >Game of the Year = All devs label their releases as their GOTY. 10/ 10 = I'm so funny and original in my scores ! > Story-driven = Filled with cutscenes, see "cinematic" >Compelling See "cinematic" > Bring Your Friends! = Our single-player portion is garbage, or nonexistent. >Sexy = PG-13 innuendo >Dynamic-Glitchy, buggy AI and lots of crashes, no QA >Procedurally Generated We substitute content with randomization algorithms >8-bit 16/32-bit graphics with chiptunes >Early Access-Money grab with no intent of release >Lifetime Subscription = It'll tank and go F2P within six months > Controversial Trying too hard >wider audience = Dumbed down >Progressive-See Diversity >Free to Play = Unplayable until you fork over $20 >DLC = B-Team / C-Team afterthought garbage >Expansions-Dead outside of MMOs. MMOs mean 10 more levels of the same s---. > Rich History = 2 sentences of lore. >New IP-Proof of concept that won't be fully realized until the sequel, and driven into the ground from 3 onward Sequel = Cash grab >Prequel Hanging off the coat-tails of an established franchise, not associated with the original team and only vaguely familiar with the franchise > Season pass = Get about 50% of the DLC for 150% the price >Exciting new features Gimmicks >Fun = Simple >Complex-2 whole choices >Hilarious / Funny = Full of memes >Thought-provoking = Pretentious hipster garbage

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Top Comments

MushroomGuy

Jun 14, 2015 at 09:55PM EDT

That "8-bit" one has bugged me for years.

+46

megasean3000

Jun 16, 2015 at 02:55AM EDT

"We have a whole new innovative game!"
"352…"
"We truly believe this game will have some exciting new features!"
"569!"
"Wh-What are you doing?"
"Oh no, carry on! Don't mind me!"
"No seriously, what are you doing?"
"Oh, I just like to mentally count how many times devs use the same lines to advertise their games during the course of the E3. But don't mind me, just continue!"
"Then how about this! Our game's going to be thought-provoking, complex and sexy!"
"Oh my! …12!"

+20

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