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WELL YOU ARE IN LUCK
INTRODUCING: HOW TO SUBSTEP
BY ME
STEP 1: OPEN A PROGRAM ON YOUR CRAPPY WINDOWS 98 COMPUTER THAT CAN MAKE MUSIC
STEP 2: GO TO JAPAN, STEAL A BABY ROBOT, COME HOME, AND STEAL ITS CANDY, THEN RECORD IT
STEP 3: FART ON THE MIC
BAM! DUBSTEP

Sounds legit