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The title is pretty self-explanatory. Just take any play, movie, or show, and just summarize the whole thing.

Warning: This play contains language.

The Great Escape

Characters:

Faggot
Dumb Bitch
Home Intruder

Ok, so Faggot and Dumb Bitch live in an apartment together and they're married. Faggot starts beating up Dumb Bitch because he thinks she's a whore, which she is. A few days later Home Intruder comes into their apartment room thinking it's his and Dumb Bitch says "You're in the wrong room." So Home Intruder says ok and leaves. Then the next day, Faggot and Dumb Bitch are having breakfast when Home Intruder comes in thinking it's his room again. Faggot asks who it is, and Dumb Bitch says it's her friend, so Faggot says ok and Home Intruder leaves. As soon as he does, Faggot starts yelling at Dumb Bitch and then begins to rape her. Then there's a magic fucking portal ten years in the future.

Dumb Bitch and Home Intruder are married and were living in the same apartment Dumb Bitch got raped in, and Faggot is in jail. Then for no fucking reason, Faggot busts through the door, gets on the floor, and walks the dinosaur and then shoots Home Intruder in the arm, and then Home Intruder dies. Then he shoots Dumb Bitch in the face and she dies. Then Faggot basically says "Fuck it" and shoots himself in the head. Then Random Fucking Crying Baby comes out of nowhere and starts to randomly fucking cry, because it's gonna take the cops two days to get there and Random Fucking Crying Baby is gonna die from hunger.

The End. (Some girl at my school made this play. I paraphrased a bit, but that's the whole thing.)

Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker (warning spoilers lol)

So Zelda goes and wakes up link, because she got caught by a giant bird, and link has to go rescue her. So he does that, but then she gets kidnapped again and brought to ganon's fortress. so zelda lets link use her ship to go save her, but then link gets thrown like a ragdoll at a windmill, where he has to buy a new boat for some reason because zelda's isnt good enough.

all of a suden, everyone starts attacking link everywhere, and there are a few dungeons and bosses to kill before link gets back to his sister's boat, where he steals some bombs because for some reason she refuses to help him. so then it is a race back to hyrule, where link has to find a cave and steal the last gem. after he gets it, a giant tower pops out of the water and he climbs to the top to fight bongo bongo for the bow and arrows. after he has them, he goes to find ganon, who is missing.

ganon was scuba diving on the bottom of the ocean, and link has to kill him to rescue his sister, who shows up just in the nick of time to steal his bow. zelda shoots ganon in the head with the master sword, and king harkinian nicks the triforce before drowning to death.

Hamlet: As retyped by a monkey

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That's all, folks.

Spongebob Squarepants

So,there's a Sponge,which is obviously gay,a pet snail,which is more intelligent than EVERYONE in the show,a stupid starfish,which does nothing at all,an eccentric squid,which plays the clarinet,a squirrel under water, a stingy crab,which owns a fast food restaurant,and some other characters…

And they experience adventures and stuff,because they're so awesome…they even meet David Hasselhoff…

The End…

My Little Pony:
So there's these ponies, and old dudes on the internet masturbate to them.
The end.

Playing Devil's Advocate for the win.

King of the hill:
Propane, beer, and

That's pretty much it.

Dawn of the Dead
4 people take a helicopter to a zombie-infested mall, then they just fool around for the next 3 months. Then two get bitten by zombies and turn into zombies. The other 2 leave because some biker gang ruined all their fun.

Romeo and Juliet explained in one word.
Fraternities.

Harry Potter

One day some big hairy man visits Harry. "Ur a wizard." He says.
"Cool." Harry thinks. And then he goes to Hogwarts to have adventure.

The Social Network:
A frat boy gets drunk, makes a website and becomes a millionaire.

Meh.

Left dead.
A Vietnam Veteran, a stereotype Tough guy, a cute nerd boner enraging Girl, and a token black guy white wannabe, make their Escape from the zombie Apocalypse.

L4D2.
A Fat Black Man, Sassy Black Women, Redneck, and a Asshole from Las Vegas, get ditched in the middle of a zombie Apocalypse by a Rescue team, who makes them run up a burning building to get to the escape helicopter.

Futurama:
A retard, a bitch and an alcoholic, chain-smoking, kleptomaniac robot fail at their jobs as a delivery crew.

Pokemon:
Magical creatures get turned into furry porn by sick fucks on the internet.

Homestuck:
A bunch of homosexuals do random shit.

Mario:
An Italian plumber somehow gets into some magical world and has to save some dumb bitch who keeps getting herself kidnapped from a giant mutant turtle.

Portal
Some robot bitch convinces some mute bitch that she'll get cake after doing puzzles with some mini robot bitches with machine guns that try to kill the mute bitch. Instead of cake there's a big fire. The mute bitch kills the robot bitch and gets thrown on the ground in the parking lot after being sucked through the ceiling of the room where the robot bitch was. The end.

Final Fantasy 7:

Aerith dies.

Half Life

Some mute douche fucks up at his job and totally screws over everyone at his work. He grabs a fucking crowbar and starts to fuck up everyone in his way. He then kills a fetus and gets hired by some creepy fuck who is probably a child molester.

The end.

YGOTAS

Some kids with crazy hair play card games. In America.

Pokemon.

A kid that never ages goes on a quest to become a Pokemon Master, never succeeds.

Minecraft:
A blocky guy who tries to survive in a blocky world by making blocky house and killing blocky creatures.

Phoenix Wright:
Objection!

Metal Gear:
I feel asleep.

Metal Gear Solid:
What was that noise!?

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night:
Die monster! You don't belong in this world!
It was not by my hand that I was brought back to the flesh, I was brought back by humans who wised to pay me tribute!
Tribute? You steal men's souls and make them your slaves.
Perhaps the same could be said of all religions!
Your words are as empty as your soul! Mankind ill needs a savior such as you!
Man? What is a man? A miserable pile of secrets! But enough talk, have at you!

Bitchin'.

High School of the Dead: BEWBS!
Nuffsaid.

Know Your Meme is a show that steals memes for Sony

wait what is this thread about again

CORRECTION!
Know Your Meme:
Pwnage, trolls, spambots and memes.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure…
Oh boy, this is going to be HARD.

First we have a bastard named Dio. Dio is evil, Dio is a fucking moron. He's adopted by a dude with a son named Jonathan Joestar. JoJo is a silly boy. Dio hates him, so Dio wants to FUCK HIS LIFE… and maybe him. So Dio FUCKIN' BURNS HIS DOG ALIVE! (And kisses JoJo's girlfriend by the way). So now JoJo is angry! But he's still a silly boy so ignores his anger. Years later JoJo finds a mask! …Ok. Dio wants this mask, why? We don't care! He steals JoJo's info and transforms into a vampire. He kills JoJo's dad and escapes! JoJo wanders looking for allies and he meets Sombrero-Man. He learns Hamon! Then… SUPER 80's SHONEN BATTLES! ATATATATA! JoJo kills Dio. He gets married and… Dio rapes his body with his head… Eeeeew.

Years later… New York! Joseph Joestar is a douche (but he gets better). JoJo loves Coca-Cola and his granny. JoJo is attacked by a vampire! Now JoJo finds a bunch of Nazis in Tijuana and drags himself up. Tequila? NO. He kicks their asses! There are naked men on a rock. They eat vampires with their flesh. …eeew. JoJo fights, he loses. Guile-hairy weird Nazi fights… dead. Now JoJo must learn Hamon! He meets Sombrero-Man's grandson. He's a douche… as well. They're now friends! JoJo trains with super hot lady. JoJo then fights with naked man 1, He wins! Douche 2 fights with naked man 2, he dies. CEEEEAAAASAAARRR!!!!! JoJo wants revenge, he gets it. Now JoJo fights with naked man 3. Fight… fight… fight. Super Hot Lady is JoJo's mom… she's a MILF… I'm okay with this. JoJo fights. Naked Man uses weird stone and now is a MONSTER! JoJo escapes. Guile-Nazi Man is dead-not! And is a cyborg! JoJo rides a plane and crashes into Naked Monster. FUCKIN' PIRANHAS! Naked Monser is on SPAAAAACE. He's inmortal, now he's live mindless flesh. JoJo wins!

Joseph meets Jotaro Kujo in Japan. WOW, STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. Dio is back with JoJo 1's body… rape, told you. They must stop him so JoJo's mom doesn't die… OK. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. And… bishonen boy… CLAMP-LAND HERE WE GO! JoJo, Chuck Norris… I mean, Gramps, Clampy-boy and Chicken Man fly to Egypt. They meet weird hairdo man, he's french. And… STANDS, STANDS, STANDS. They meet bad cowboy dude. Avdol is dead! Who cares. More stands. New ally, a dog. Many dogs die. And… CAIRO! Avdol's not dead. Clampy-boy is at the hospital. Weird shit happens. Vanilla Ice. ICE, ICE, BABY! More weird shit happens. Avdol, dead. Cute dog, dead. Clamp-boy not dead, NOW HE'S KEANU REEVES! Dio's back. Kills Keanu. Keanu is sad. Gramps almost dead. French dude, almost dead. ZA WARUDO! JoJo can stop time too. FUCKIN' MAGNETS, HOW DO THEY WORK? ZA WARUDO! STEAMROLLER. Boom! FALCON PUNCH! Dio's dead. Gramps, alive. French, alive. Get back, JoJo!

And that my friends, is JoJo's Bizarre Adventure.

…WAIT! THERE'RE EVEN MORE PARTS! OH, OK. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. Some Killer Queen. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. Girly men. Girly men. FABULOUSLY GIRLY MEN. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. BOOM, NO MORE WORLD. Reebot baybee! Cowboys and STEEL BALLS. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. STANDS. STANDS. WEIRD SHIT. ZA WARUDO?!!! Balls.

There you have it. THE END… Part 8? Screw it, I'm going home.

Lord of the rings.

Two midgets jump into a volcano with a goldring.

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow:

Okay, so Professor Stringbean moves to a place called Sleepy Hollow. He becomes a bitch of a schoolmaster, who can't even live in his own house, so he has to actually LIVE WITH HIS STUDENTS, totally reversing the power that the whole schoolmaster thing, by basically being his pupils' butler. Also he's into the supernatural and stuff like that, which i guess makes chicks horny, because every girl in the city wants his cock. But this dude isn't even brave. He walks home through the woods every night, and scares the shit out of himself so brave, that he BREAKS INTO FUCKING SONG. Like, seriously, who the heck thinks they can stop fears just by singing? Okay, so this big wimp also gets picked on by Brom Boner, or whatever his name is, who's basically this huge ass ape guy, which I guess also turned girls on back then. So basically, both Scrawny and Boner want this… FINE bitch Katrina. I mean here's some in story description of her: "…and [she wore] a provokingly short petticoat, to display the prettiest foot and ankle in the country round." Doesn't that just get the ol' hormone juices flowing? Well these two foot fetishists are so obsessed with her, they're willing to throw down, just to win her hand in marriage. By throw down, i mean try to embarrass each other and avoid all physical confrontation. So finally, she hosts a dance, and Bonder and Skinny are invited. There they talk about… some ghost guy who isn't seemingly important to the plot- BUT ANYWAYS

They dance, and then the story won't tell me what happens after the party. It says Scrawny walks out sad, after speaking one on one with Hotstuff. People say that he tried to propose to her, and she turned him down; I say they finally got in bed, and then she saw how small he was, and kicked him out.

But anyways, Slim gets on his horse and starts to ride away, and he gets scared at every sight he sees, except for this tall, cloaked figure that starts following him. Then it's ACTIVATE MAN MODE which gets him nowhere, until he sees that this big cloaked figure was the ghost dude without a head we were talking about earlier chasing him! So they take off, but Lanky over here can't really ride very well, and his horse is a bitch too. So this ghost does the stupidest thing possible, and after spending all this time looking for his head, he grabs it, and throws it that Stringbean, knocking him off of his horse, into a river. So we guess he dies, and so do all of the townsfolk, and everybody thinks its the ghost. Except we all know it was Brawn Boner (because this dude has the worst poker face), even though he had no motive and gets married to Katrina anyways. SHE ALREADY TURNED HIM DOWN, YOU DIDN'T NEED TO KILL HIM.

TL;DR Moral of the story: Don't ever try; You'll just fail and then people better than you will kill you.

Lost your virginity…

Now have crabs….

Team Fortress 2:
I AM BULLETPROOF!!1
BONK!
I have no idea!

Zelda: Same as Mario except with a gay little elf boy instead of an Italian plumber and a creepy guy with a big pointy nose and green skin a Jew instead of a mutant turtle.

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
Colorful ponies do crazy shit in a crazy town, learn shit, go to some gala.

Pokemon Black and White:

So you are asked if you have a penis and yur liek hell no! So you are in yur house when your abused blonde friend and overly ambitious fan-shipping device come into jur room and then you have pokeman battles and yur room gets shat on and then you clean it and then you go beat soem Jim leaders and they give you medallions that force pokemans under your control and then you force them to break rocks and cut trees and be used as live surfboards and then you crush some kindergartener'sss dreams. Then you meet this furry PETA worker at a ferris wheel and he is liek 'LOL I haz to saev the pokermonz" and thenn you see that he has liek and evil orgynization that wunts to free the sla-I MEAN POGEYMONS. And then you crush your frens dreams because you are a mute fag and then you beat some more Jim Leadurps and fight the furry after you go thru a caev and then he summons teh dragon mons and you beats him and capture the dragonmonZ and he goes "OEMG I has done teh wrtongz and stuff" and then there is a sloppy makeout and then yopu fight his DaD who is liek a jerk who liooks like he is from Dragon BALLS zee and he goes omfg man lol this sux" and he runs away like a pussy and the giant castle that i forgot to mention ranbdyumly disapears and you win the L337 4 and get freakin lots of fame and then everybuddy forgets and then you go find the jerk gies's 7 apostles and you get theri TMZs asnd then they tell ytou stuff and you fight sat a SUBWAYtm and get stuff and be a pogerMans chimpanzion the ENDD.

The Know Your Meme forums:

A bunch of really cool people post meme references in hopes of getting Krama.

&hypocrisy

TMNT: PIZZA!

4chan: A website the police should learn to use as bait.

Rage Comics:
le le le le le le
poorly drawn table
le moi
[First]

Burnout:
Phantom killer cars which can do sick stunts.

Azumanga Daioh:

A autistic girl, a big titted mute, a loli, some hyperactive bitch, a black chick and Yomi do weird shit and get assaulted by some pedophile. And there's a cat.

Sliced bread:
They take bread, deny you the option to cut the slices to a width of your preference, then expect you to marvel over the convenience.

The Game (and its variations):
FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU

Katekyo Hitman Reborn:
A kid who gets "power-up" by shooting himself in the head.
Also,he became the head of a mafia family for no reason.

Lucky Star

4 school girls eat chocolate cornets,do random stuff and the fanboys go crazy (including me)

300:

Some Persian king who rips his nipple off and staples it back on is being challenged by a party of retards headed by a guy whose Australia is munched off by a dog. Oh wait, that's the parody.

MML3: Oh wait….

Harry Potter Series:
Snape kills Dumbledore

Transformers Series:
Expolsions

The Internet

PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN video games nyan cat PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PRON PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN

o wait you said worst

Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo (actual title):
WHAT THE SHIT IS GOING ON

Oh, this is easy. I tend to be vague.

Crime and Punishment:
This russian human accidentally kills his old landlady and spends the entire book freaking out about it.

Harry Potter:
A boy with magic powers goes to a school full of magic people but evil wizards are trying to take over the place and he works with his friends to stop them with the power of lightning wizard duels and some old crap they found lying around.

Doctor Who:
A non-human travels around in a box that's bigger on the inside and solves mysteries like in Scooby Doo, only the man behind the mask is not a man at all. He's an alien. And everything is exactly as it appears only more complicated.

Pokemon:
Humans collect elemental creatures and make them fight one another for entertainment and profit.

Black Swan:
What.
I guess this human woman starts going insane because her mother is crazy and ballet is serious business. Then the movie goes Tyler Durden/Fight Club on you.

Scrubs:
A bromance story taken too far….