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Bert plays a wizard.

Do you know what casting a Fireball spell sounds like Ernie? It roars like a dragon, a fiery God purging everything in its path. Keep casting, one after another, and the WHOOSH-BOOM drowns out everything else. Focus on the noise and you can almost convince yourself you don't hear the screams. By the time you're out of spell slots, everything's over, even the men are quiet. There's nothing but the crackling of burning thatch. You see Ernie, it's not the noise that keeps me awake at night. It's the silence.

Do you know what casting a Fireball spell sounds like Ernie? It roars like a dragon, a fiery God purging everything in its path. Keep casting, one after another, and the WHOOSH-BOOM drowns out everything else. Focus on the noise and you can almost convince yourself you don't hear the screams. By the time you're out of spell slots, everything's over, even the men are quiet. There's nothing but the crackling of burning thatch. You see Ernie, it's not the noise that keeps me awake at night. It's the silence.

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'Stop the Count' wasn't referring to the election. All those characters who aren't on the show anymo...

Benny Rabbit, Bruno the Trashman, Don Music, Roosevelt Franklin, Betty Lou, Murray, Biff and Sull and Harvey Kneeslapper are just some of The Count's victims

Benny Rabbit, Bruno the Trashman, Don Music, Roosevelt Franklin, Betty Lou, Murray, Biff and Sull and Harvey Kneeslapper are just some of The Count's victims

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He never took Kermit replacing him very well...

Yes Nigel, that conductor of the orchestra we see in every episode of The Muppet Show and a frequent background character in some of the Muppet movies was originally conceived as the host of the show and was the host in the pilot episode The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence, but it was felt he was too dull and it was suggested to make Kermit, an already established and popular character, the lead. Ever since finding that out I've wondered if that would eventually take its toll on his psyche and he'd eventually snap.

Yes Nigel, that conductor of the orchestra we see in every episode of The Muppet Show and a frequent background character in some of the Muppet movies was originally conceived as the host of the show and was the host in the pilot episode The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence, but it was felt he was too dull and it was suggested to make Kermit, an already established and popular character, the lead. Ever since finding that out I've wondered if that would eventually take its toll on his psyche and he'd eventually snap.

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Elmo Knows What You Did With That Hooker

Elmo was a skilled Peeping Tom

Elmo was a skilled Peeping Tom

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Somebody Once Told Me...

Oscar suddenly realized what p---- parody he signed up for once he hears Smash Mouth

Oscar suddenly realized what p---- parody he signed up for once he hears Smash Mouth

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Horror story of....cookie monster

Cookie Monster screams in horror as Elmo's trip on bath salts takes a turn for the worse

Cookie Monster screams in horror as Elmo's trip on bath salts takes a turn for the worse

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No man should have all that power

Ernie has technologically surpassed the N-Word-Pass and created the N-Word-Portal. Grover's heart trembles with fear, as he cannot fathom what lies beyond. Not even Ernie knows.

Ernie has technologically surpassed the N-Word-Pass and created the N-Word-Portal. Grover's heart trembles with fear, as he cannot fathom what lies beyond. Not even Ernie knows.

ernie grover n-word

Meanwhile in alternative universe without COVID-19...

Telly and Oscar have a hard time watching Cuties in a movie theater due to all the loud moaning and fapping noises from the other moviegoers.

Telly and Oscar have a hard time watching Cuties in a movie theater due to all the loud moaning and fapping noises from the other moviegoers.

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"It's like my father always said, every stable marriage is built on lies and alcohol."

"So then my wife showed me her c--- and I was like 'H--------! How did I not notice that?!' and that's when I realized she was right and l've been drunk for basically our whole marriage."

"So then my wife showed me her c--- and I was like 'H--------! How did I not notice that?!' and that's when I realized she was right and l've been drunk for basically our whole marriage."

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Stay away from the zoomer and its unfunny memes

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I'm blue da ba dee da ba die

SESAME WORXSKOP EOX NEWS MEAN DVD WARNING: EARLY SESAME SIREETS STREET EPISODES NOT FOR KIDS -channel Cookie Monster used to be known as "cooking monster" for his prolific meth distribution.

SESAME WORXSKOP EOX NEWS MEAN DVD WARNING: EARLY SESAME SIREETS STREET EPISODES NOT FOR KIDS -channel Cookie Monster used to be known as "cooking monster" for his prolific meth distribution.

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And thus, the legend of "Gonzo: the blue phoenix" was born

"Well, I've been clinically depressed for basically my whole life. But one day it hit me: if I'm already attempting suicide every other week, why not get paid while l'm at it?"

"Well, I've been clinically depressed for basically my whole life. But one day it hit me: if I'm already attempting suicide every other week, why not get paid while l'm at it?"

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Ernie Creates A Wojak Meme

"Hey Bert! Remember earlier today when we had the argument over whether or not triangle hentai was good? Well, I'm taking what you said and I'm putting that next to a soyboy wojak that looks like you! How do you like them apples, Bert?"

"Hey Bert! Remember earlier today when we had the argument over whether or not triangle hentai was good? Well, I'm taking what you said and I'm putting that next to a soyboy wojak that looks like you! How do you like them apples, Bert?"

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Friendship transcends politics

After the initial shock subsided from Bert coming out as identifying as a little girl and Ernie dressing up as a far right hate symbol, the two till agree that their friendship transcends politics.

After the initial shock subsided from Bert coming out as identifying as a little girl and Ernie dressing up as a far right hate symbol, the two till agree that their friendship transcends politics.

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"Ok Bert, I'll take it back to the store. But with the all stains, I don't think we'll get a full re...

123 "No, Ernie, we're not keeping the sex robot that looks like me and has a three foot mechanical penis just so you can point at it when you're angry and tell me to go f--- myself."

123 "No, Ernie, we're not keeping the sex robot that looks like me and has a three foot mechanical penis just so you can point at it when you're angry and tell me to go f--- myself."

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and the ride is just starting...

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