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Retardation vs. PTSD

Anonymous 10/31/13(Thu)19:11:53 No.513691304 I witnessed the most horrific Tard event. >Be in school walking down crowded corridor >Spot tard holding sandwich 214 KB PNG >This tard is known for flipping out violently and a wrangler is nowhere to be seen >Suddenly, amongst the crowd, someone bumps into the tard and knocks his sandwich out his hand >A slice of ham lands on some quiet kid who is by his locker ohgodno.avi >Like the horns of Jericho, the tard lets out noise that could bring down the walls of a fortress >He leaps on the quiet kid and tackles him to the ground, eyes glazed over in feral rage ohshitnigger.jpg >The tard sinks his teeth into this kid's upper thigh, but somehow still roaring little did I know, thta the quiet kid was suffering from PTSD from a violent dog attack >He flips his s--- and unleashes an epic 45-hit fist combo into the tards face >As the punches keep landing, the tard's face is slowly becoming mushier and redder The tard increases his bite strengh and his growl grows louder >The quiet kid is now bawling his eyes out but he doesn't cease his furious punching >Blood is beginning to be splattered about the hall from the tard's face >the bite mark is now flowing freely with blood as well like lightning, the quiet kid grabs the tard's forehead with one hand and right hooks him in the jaw with the other. audiblecrack.mp3 >the tard flops off the kid and begins writing on the floor, smearing blood and saliva everywhere the quiet kid looks at his bloodsoaked fists, pukes and passes out (probably from the pain of the bite) >MFW he broke a tard's jaw to free himself MFW the hallway looks like the f------ somme MFW at least 10 kids had to have counselling after seeing this Also, Tard stories general
Anonymous 10/31/13(Thu)19:11:53 No.513691304 I witnessed the most horrific Tard event. >Be in school walking down crowded corridor >Spot tard holding sandwich 214 KB PNG >This tard is known for flipping out violently and a wrangler is nowhere to be seen >Suddenly, amongst the crowd, someone bumps into the tard and knocks his sandwich out his hand >A slice of ham lands on some quiet kid who is by his locker ohgodno.avi >Like the horns of Jericho, the tard lets out noise that could bring down the walls of a fortress >He leaps on the quiet kid and tackles him to the ground, eyes glazed over in feral rage ohshitnigger.jpg >The tard sinks his teeth into this kid's upper thigh, but somehow still roaring little did I know, thta the quiet kid was suffering from PTSD from a violent dog attack >He flips his s--- and unleashes an epic 45-hit fist combo into the tards face >As the punches keep landing, the tard's face is slowly becoming mushier and redder The tard increases his bite strengh and his growl grows louder >The quiet kid is now bawling his eyes out but he doesn't cease his furious punching >Blood is beginning to be splattered about the hall from the tard's face >the bite mark is now flowing freely with blood as well like lightning, the quiet kid grabs the tard's forehead with one hand and right hooks him in the jaw with the other. audiblecrack.mp3 >the tard flops off the kid and begins writing on the floor, smearing blood and saliva everywhere the quiet kid looks at his bloodsoaked fists, pukes and passes out (probably from the pain of the bite) >MFW he broke a tard's jaw to free himself MFW the hallway looks like the f------ somme MFW at least 10 kids had to have counselling after seeing this Also, Tard stories general

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ARE YOU OKAY?

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:21:26 No.615134651 >Grade 8 >Walking to the bathroom >Tard wrangler standing outsite the toilet area >"Hey anon, adam is in there, try not to bother him >Alright >Walk in, see adam pacing around in a huff >Pull up to the urinal, start to pee >Adam stares into the gap between my arm and the urinal >"Adam thats not okay, seriously, just go" >l forget adam can only say either "are you okay" and "am I okay" >"Are you okay" >"Yes, adam! Just stop looking at my noodle!" I zip up >He is angry I yelled >He storms around the bathroom making the sound of a rusty shopping cart wheel >"ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU OKAY" >thisistheend.png >Hops up onto the sink >Craps a bit >Hops down, finishes the rest of his dump on the floor "AM I OKAY AM I OKAY AMI OKAY" >Tard wrangler hears commotion >Walks in, sees him and I and the mess "ANON WHA-" >Adam throws a rock at her >wat.jpg >Throws a handful of playground pebbles at her >She has her faced turned into a corner >He dumps a bunch of big rocks into the urinals Runs out of the bathroom >Hits there stairs and falls down them colliding with the resident black guy >"DUDE WHAT THE HELL" >Realizes its adam, smeared in feces >Takes off >Im walking back to class >Hear the vice principal talking to adam ARE YOU OKAY AM I OKAY ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU ARE YOU ARE
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:21:26 No.615134651 >Grade 8 >Walking to the bathroom >Tard wrangler standing outsite the toilet area >"Hey anon, adam is in there, try not to bother him >Alright >Walk in, see adam pacing around in a huff >Pull up to the urinal, start to pee >Adam stares into the gap between my arm and the urinal >"Adam thats not okay, seriously, just go" >l forget adam can only say either "are you okay" and "am I okay" >"Are you okay" >"Yes, adam! Just stop looking at my noodle!" I zip up >He is angry I yelled >He storms around the bathroom making the sound of a rusty shopping cart wheel >"ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU OKAY" >thisistheend.png >Hops up onto the sink >Craps a bit >Hops down, finishes the rest of his dump on the floor "AM I OKAY AM I OKAY AMI OKAY" >Tard wrangler hears commotion >Walks in, sees him and I and the mess "ANON WHA-" >Adam throws a rock at her >wat.jpg >Throws a handful of playground pebbles at her >She has her faced turned into a corner >He dumps a bunch of big rocks into the urinals Runs out of the bathroom >Hits there stairs and falls down them colliding with the resident black guy >"DUDE WHAT THE HELL" >Realizes its adam, smeared in feces >Takes off >Im walking back to class >Hear the vice principal talking to adam ARE YOU OKAY AM I OKAY ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU ARE YOU ARE

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How could square danceing possibly go wrong?

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:17:39 No.61 5126363、2-615133327 >Be me junior in high school > last day > make bet with friend that if I wear a thong to the last day of school hell give me $50 > come t > first block goes smoothly except for a serious weggie > 2nd block gym oh crap > realizing the thongs outline is clearly visible through the shorts I decide to go European style > no underwear >we start the class by stretching which I find out is pretty easy with mah ding-iling flopen around >Next we have square dancing > oh come one > I try to leave the gym but am stopped by the PE teacher who pairs me with a tard >oh god why > this tard is a whale > we start dancing and I'm trying 10 fight the urge of puking due to the smell this tard is emitting >she then accidently grazes her hand on my crotch >she takes a step back and looks at me with wide eyes o school wearing pink thong RUNEKED in thick tard dialect > wut > UR NEKED she starts to scream oh no > people begin to stare as she begins to scream the same words in a tard rage > HESA NEKKED! > at this moment the female PE teacher try to stop her > The tard then pushes the PE teacher to the ground and rushes towards the nearest exit > Since the tard being a tard didn't realize the door was locked she begins banging on it with all her might > at this tirne the security are in the gym > once she's corned her screams again HESA NEKKED > the security then restrain her and escort her out of the gym > while she's struggling to get away she screams in the language of her people >XERDCFGBYUGNURFEDIOHBJMIOESNMBIOFERMAGGIREZHJGJNE > that's the last time anyone saw her I barely got questioned about why she was screaming and still got the 50S
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:17:39 No.61 5126363、2-615133327 >Be me junior in high school > last day > make bet with friend that if I wear a thong to the last day of school hell give me $50 > come t > first block goes smoothly except for a serious weggie > 2nd block gym oh crap > realizing the thongs outline is clearly visible through the shorts I decide to go European style > no underwear >we start the class by stretching which I find out is pretty easy with mah ding-iling flopen around >Next we have square dancing > oh come one > I try to leave the gym but am stopped by the PE teacher who pairs me with a tard >oh god why > this tard is a whale > we start dancing and I'm trying 10 fight the urge of puking due to the smell this tard is emitting >she then accidently grazes her hand on my crotch >she takes a step back and looks at me with wide eyes o school wearing pink thong RUNEKED in thick tard dialect > wut > UR NEKED she starts to scream oh no > people begin to stare as she begins to scream the same words in a tard rage > HESA NEKKED! > at this moment the female PE teacher try to stop her > The tard then pushes the PE teacher to the ground and rushes towards the nearest exit > Since the tard being a tard didn't realize the door was locked she begins banging on it with all her might > at this tirne the security are in the gym > once she's corned her screams again HESA NEKKED > the security then restrain her and escort her out of the gym > while she's struggling to get away she screams in the language of her people >XERDCFGBYUGNURFEDIOHBJMIOESNMBIOFERMAGGIREZHJGJNE > that's the last time anyone saw her I barely got questioned about why she was screaming and still got the 50S

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electric sharpener + grease pencil = ???

>In middle school >There is an autistic kid in history class, not full retard but still pretty slow >Get chosen by teacher to help him with a worksheet >F------ great >I tell him every answer so he can copy it on his paper >He decides to use a grease pencil that he stole from the science lab instead of a regular one >He says "Anon I gotta sharpen my pencil" >I tell him it won't work >He doesn't listen >Walks up to front of classroom >Shoves grease pencil into electric sharpener >It gets mucked up instantly and breaks >Retard screams EEEGAAAAAAHHHH and throws pencil sharpener on floor >Rips off his jacket, throws in the air >Runs out of classroom, screaming down the hallway >Teacher instantly dashes out of room, yelling "SOMEBODY HELLLLLPPP! HE'S LOOSE!!!" >Everyone is completely silent, listening to the chaos unfolding outside >Whole class looks at me, friend says "Anon, what did you do?!" >Shrug >Everyone lol'd
>In middle school >There is an autistic kid in history class, not full retard but still pretty slow >Get chosen by teacher to help him with a worksheet >F------ great >I tell him every answer so he can copy it on his paper >He decides to use a grease pencil that he stole from the science lab instead of a regular one >He says "Anon I gotta sharpen my pencil" >I tell him it won't work >He doesn't listen >Walks up to front of classroom >Shoves grease pencil into electric sharpener >It gets mucked up instantly and breaks >Retard screams EEEGAAAAAAHHHH and throws pencil sharpener on floor >Rips off his jacket, throws in the air >Runs out of classroom, screaming down the hallway >Teacher instantly dashes out of room, yelling "SOMEBODY HELLLLLPPP! HE'S LOOSE!!!" >Everyone is completely silent, listening to the chaos unfolding outside >Whole class looks at me, friend says "Anon, what did you do?!" >Shrug >Everyone lol'd

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Tards and a Panther

#35-the reasonable perso (01/03/201 4 H Here is a tard event of my own. Happened about a year ago. Some parts may be exaggerated for comedic effect. Be working for a museum that collects old armored vehicles We have this 1942 Panther tank that my boss is really f------ proud of. Its just a metal shell really. It doesn't work anymore I'm escorting a school tour group. Itis obvious that some of them are Ivl 100 tards Another guy, we'll call him Al, is talking about the things were showing them. We come to the Panther which is parked next to a british Matilda I'm getting bored so lean against the wall and entertain myself by pushing a little cockroach around Boss has showed up and is talking proudly about the tank. I notice a few of the students have walked off and I go to find them. l find them. 2 tards. Pissing on the matilda Ohhellno.gif "Hey! What do you think you're doing!?" One of them tries to run but is tripped by his pants that are around his ankles He smashes his face against the panther. He screams and projectile s---- all over the left rear of the tank. My boss turns around to see the commotion Deathstare jpeg Boss looks like he's about to go full rage mode He kicks all the specials eds out and polishes the entire tank for f------ hours Me and Al continue the tour with the remaining students
#35-the reasonable perso (01/03/201 4 H Here is a tard event of my own. Happened about a year ago. Some parts may be exaggerated for comedic effect. Be working for a museum that collects old armored vehicles We have this 1942 Panther tank that my boss is really f------ proud of. Its just a metal shell really. It doesn't work anymore I'm escorting a school tour group. Itis obvious that some of them are Ivl 100 tards Another guy, we'll call him Al, is talking about the things were showing them. We come to the Panther which is parked next to a british Matilda I'm getting bored so lean against the wall and entertain myself by pushing a little cockroach around Boss has showed up and is talking proudly about the tank. I notice a few of the students have walked off and I go to find them. l find them. 2 tards. Pissing on the matilda Ohhellno.gif "Hey! What do you think you're doing!?" One of them tries to run but is tripped by his pants that are around his ankles He smashes his face against the panther. He screams and projectile s---- all over the left rear of the tank. My boss turns around to see the commotion Deathstare jpeg Boss looks like he's about to go full rage mode He kicks all the specials eds out and polishes the entire tank for f------ hours Me and Al continue the tour with the remaining students

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Brian and Bradley

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:41:55 No.615137363 >middle school >school has a television set for child versed news >play them every morning >but today was special svery special >two of our local retards were doing a realtime, locally aired seminar on bullying stheir names were brian and bradley swrangler holding post in the background sthey started off giving examples of what bullying was >"saying names, ummmumm and hitting people" >"all demanstrate" >OH S--- >brian punches bradley in the a "OW SToooPID" >punches him back >you could see the wrangler getting ready to rumble sthey start screaming >it was like surround sound throughout the entire building >they sprinted out of the room before the wrangler even knew what happened >everybody in the school was out of their seats and ready to herd into the halls >bradley was running away from brian crying and s------- himself all the same >the screaming over the microphone continued more distorted and screeching more distinctly every second sthey were going f------ nuts >bradley tripped and brian immediately pulled down his sweatpants >bradley is screaming for mercy at this point, face as red as a pink blueberry, and tears streaming down his eyes >he was f------ pissing on him h-------- sby now half the school was crowded around thenm swrangler grabs brian by the arms and starts pulling him away suncontrolled streams spraying those in front row seats >nothing but screaming sone of the teachers pulls out a peanut butter jar, open with a plastic spoon in it swut >suddenly everything goes quiet except the sobbing of this humiliated buttered potatoe fermenting on the ground >everybody goes back to class and nothing ever happened since
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:41:55 No.615137363 >middle school >school has a television set for child versed news >play them every morning >but today was special svery special >two of our local retards were doing a realtime, locally aired seminar on bullying stheir names were brian and bradley swrangler holding post in the background sthey started off giving examples of what bullying was >"saying names, ummmumm and hitting people" >"all demanstrate" >OH S--- >brian punches bradley in the a "OW SToooPID" >punches him back >you could see the wrangler getting ready to rumble sthey start screaming >it was like surround sound throughout the entire building >they sprinted out of the room before the wrangler even knew what happened >everybody in the school was out of their seats and ready to herd into the halls >bradley was running away from brian crying and s------- himself all the same >the screaming over the microphone continued more distorted and screeching more distinctly every second sthey were going f------ nuts >bradley tripped and brian immediately pulled down his sweatpants >bradley is screaming for mercy at this point, face as red as a pink blueberry, and tears streaming down his eyes >he was f------ pissing on him h-------- sby now half the school was crowded around thenm swrangler grabs brian by the arms and starts pulling him away suncontrolled streams spraying those in front row seats >nothing but screaming sone of the teachers pulls out a peanut butter jar, open with a plastic spoon in it swut >suddenly everything goes quiet except the sobbing of this humiliated buttered potatoe fermenting on the ground >everybody goes back to class and nothing ever happened since

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Jacob want's his home gril!

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:23:40 No. 61 5127074 615127215 끄615128945 me >meet tard from class, name Jacolb >Jacob is the only tard in school, so naturally everyone loves him in stard approaches crush ome >tells her "baby we can go back and listen to nickelback" >she says eff that, wants no part of it >Jacob starts going crazy >spits in her hair >I'm the only one in class laughing, teacher is giving me the meanest of all the scowls >she tries to get up to leave >Jacob is blocking her way for some reason, Jacob taught himself that whenever you close your lips to kiss someone you also have to close your eyes >doesn't see where his lips are landin >misses completely and falls over desk >hits head on a desk that was right next to it >at this point I'm about ready to piss my pants >Jacob gets up, notices crush leaving the room and says "N---- YOU GET BACK HERE >out of embarrassment, I left the room was in the bathroom the rest of the day >called mom to ask if she could bring fresh pair of underwear and pants >say it's a long story and Ill explain it later Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:25:07 No. 61 512721 5 ▶ 615127331 22615128945 >opening of the local pool is today >of course Jacob wanting to see all of his home grils in 2 pieces is first in line to get in >also the last person in line >is only person in line >about an hour later, people start to show up >Jacob blasts through the doors >doesnt even pay admission >doesnt care either >literally the only one in the entire pool besides the staff >yells "WOMEN WITH YOUR BOOBS LET EM HANG OUT" >me, being in the middle of the line, can hear and see him through the chain link fence >collapse from laughter, it's math class all over again >went swimming for a bit, got ready to go home >but as I was leaving, out of ALL the people that could show up >his crush piece >Jacob is aiming down the sights of his red hot boner >approaches her and says >"baby you better get on this it aint gonna last" I should mention, at this point, everyone in the town besides Jacob's family absolutely hates him >crush slaps his face >cries like a little girl >mom comes over, unaware of what happened >asks >says to mom "I didn't get laid again" >feeling like I might have a hernia from laughing this hard Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:26:14 No.61 5127331 >>615127908と2615128945 >see friend is now friends with Jacob >tilt head back in amazement that tard can use computer go to his profile >profile picture is Quagmire from Family Guy She's obsessed with that show >look at his status updates >he's been listening to "Something in your Mouth by nickelback for 3 days >delve into this hurricane of laughter and hysteria >find out that he's been sharing selfies of crushes he has >status updates say "I want "crush" in me so bad She is my weakest link >Have no idea what he's trying to say >Look a little further >Obsessed with something called Flash Cotton" >Assume it's a superhero of some sort, I dont know >discover that Jacob makes bitstrips over >read all of them >laugh to the point where snot is coming out of my nose >mostly incoherent dribble about how he wants it to rain 50,000 inches today or how he's going to London to bang his girls Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:31:01 No.615127908 · 226151289452261512902922615133849 >last day of sch >Jacob going crazy that >doesnt realize he doesnt have any friends >thinks all the popular kids are his friends because they mess with him occasionally he wont see any of his friends again we're in biology >taking my exam et >all of the sudden I hear moaning >Jacob is crying Steacher tries to calm him down >jacob goes on about how he's going to miss his homies and how he's moving to Auckland, New Zealand >probably doesn't even know where that is anyways he keeps crying >holding back laughter >all of the sudden I hear from Jacob "and it's all because of YOUR FAULT! >points to his crush >don't care about the exam anymore, too busy looking at what's going to happen >she tries not to be a part of it >l don't blame her >Jacob, while crying, asks her "Why you haven't banged with me baby? I got a tool" >There's the biggest mixture of snot, saliva, and tears (all from laughter) all over my exam >Jacob slams his hand on the desk and yells "DAMMIT steacher at this point doesn't know what to do anymore, tries to get Jacob out of the class >Jacob is resistant >our biology class does not apply to the saying "resistance is futile" >punches teacher in the stomach steacher (who is around 350 pounds) lets out the loudest burp Ive ever heard in my life >I'm the only one laughing, I feel ashamed >Screams >Leaves class in the hallways >Says that he wants to bang his homeboys fail the exam
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:23:40 No. 61 5127074 615127215 끄615128945 me >meet tard from class, name Jacolb >Jacob is the only tard in school, so naturally everyone loves him in stard approaches crush ome >tells her "baby we can go back and listen to nickelback" >she says eff that, wants no part of it >Jacob starts going crazy >spits in her hair >I'm the only one in class laughing, teacher is giving me the meanest of all the scowls >she tries to get up to leave >Jacob is blocking her way for some reason, Jacob taught himself that whenever you close your lips to kiss someone you also have to close your eyes >doesn't see where his lips are landin >misses completely and falls over desk >hits head on a desk that was right next to it >at this point I'm about ready to piss my pants >Jacob gets up, notices crush leaving the room and says "N---- YOU GET BACK HERE >out of embarrassment, I left the room was in the bathroom the rest of the day >called mom to ask if she could bring fresh pair of underwear and pants >say it's a long story and Ill explain it later Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:25:07 No. 61 512721 5 ▶ 615127331 22615128945 >opening of the local pool is today >of course Jacob wanting to see all of his home grils in 2 pieces is first in line to get in >also the last person in line >is only person in line >about an hour later, people start to show up >Jacob blasts through the doors >doesnt even pay admission >doesnt care either >literally the only one in the entire pool besides the staff >yells "WOMEN WITH YOUR BOOBS LET EM HANG OUT" >me, being in the middle of the line, can hear and see him through the chain link fence >collapse from laughter, it's math class all over again >went swimming for a bit, got ready to go home >but as I was leaving, out of ALL the people that could show up >his crush piece >Jacob is aiming down the sights of his red hot boner >approaches her and says >"baby you better get on this it aint gonna last" I should mention, at this point, everyone in the town besides Jacob's family absolutely hates him >crush slaps his face >cries like a little girl >mom comes over, unaware of what happened >asks >says to mom "I didn't get laid again" >feeling like I might have a hernia from laughing this hard Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:26:14 No.61 5127331 >>615127908と2615128945 >see friend is now friends with Jacob >tilt head back in amazement that tard can use computer go to his profile >profile picture is Quagmire from Family Guy She's obsessed with that show >look at his status updates >he's been listening to "Something in your Mouth by nickelback for 3 days >delve into this hurricane of laughter and hysteria >find out that he's been sharing selfies of crushes he has >status updates say "I want "crush" in me so bad She is my weakest link >Have no idea what he's trying to say >Look a little further >Obsessed with something called Flash Cotton" >Assume it's a superhero of some sort, I dont know >discover that Jacob makes bitstrips over >read all of them >laugh to the point where snot is coming out of my nose >mostly incoherent dribble about how he wants it to rain 50,000 inches today or how he's going to London to bang his girls Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:31:01 No.615127908 · 226151289452261512902922615133849 >last day of sch >Jacob going crazy that >doesnt realize he doesnt have any friends >thinks all the popular kids are his friends because they mess with him occasionally he wont see any of his friends again we're in biology >taking my exam et >all of the sudden I hear moaning >Jacob is crying Steacher tries to calm him down >jacob goes on about how he's going to miss his homies and how he's moving to Auckland, New Zealand >probably doesn't even know where that is anyways he keeps crying >holding back laughter >all of the sudden I hear from Jacob "and it's all because of YOUR FAULT! >points to his crush >don't care about the exam anymore, too busy looking at what's going to happen >she tries not to be a part of it >l don't blame her >Jacob, while crying, asks her "Why you haven't banged with me baby? I got a tool" >There's the biggest mixture of snot, saliva, and tears (all from laughter) all over my exam >Jacob slams his hand on the desk and yells "DAMMIT steacher at this point doesn't know what to do anymore, tries to get Jacob out of the class >Jacob is resistant >our biology class does not apply to the saying "resistance is futile" >punches teacher in the stomach steacher (who is around 350 pounds) lets out the loudest burp Ive ever heard in my life >I'm the only one laughing, I feel ashamed >Screams >Leaves class in the hallways >Says that he wants to bang his homeboys fail the exam

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Would this be a point in favor, or aginst; playing on the toilet?

> 3rd grade, in bathroom stall, taking biggest most painful dump of my life. >Retards are taking some walk around school, have to use restroom before they leave. >Stall closed, sitting on the toilet, pushing and alternating playing my gameboy as I wait for this s--- to be over. >1 tard to the left, 1 tard to the right. 1 tard doesn't realize I'm in there, or just doesn't care, charges in, breaks door lock, almost naked cept for his shirt. > Freak the f--- out, hit him with gameboy on side of his head. >Blood on Gameboy, blood everywhere, he instantly s---- and pees himself on the way to the floor >Run for my life and fake being sick for 2 weeks to stay out of school >Come back to find out that another retard was blamed for the fighting and the handler who was nowhere to be found fired. Awesome
> 3rd grade, in bathroom stall, taking biggest most painful dump of my life. >Retards are taking some walk around school, have to use restroom before they leave. >Stall closed, sitting on the toilet, pushing and alternating playing my gameboy as I wait for this s--- to be over. >1 tard to the left, 1 tard to the right. 1 tard doesn't realize I'm in there, or just doesn't care, charges in, breaks door lock, almost naked cept for his shirt. > Freak the f--- out, hit him with gameboy on side of his head. >Blood on Gameboy, blood everywhere, he instantly s---- and pees himself on the way to the floor >Run for my life and fake being sick for 2 weeks to stay out of school >Come back to find out that another retard was blamed for the fighting and the handler who was nowhere to be found fired. Awesome

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A tard at the clinic.

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:37:17 No.615144826 >sitting in clinic this afternoon >small family with a middle age downs tard sitting with them >the mother starts getting pale >asks tard to quickly go to the car to grab her medicine and some jellybeans stard grabs keys and runs time passes >half an hour goes by >the mum is getting super pale staff ask if she is okay stells staff shes "giving her brother responsibility" or something along those lines >staff can't do anything as she has basically refused treatment >another 15 mins goes by and her husband offers to go find tard >she flares up and starts raging about how he never gives her brother a chance to do something >husband leaves anyway to find him >by this time a full hour has passed sthe airconditioning in the building has also stopped working (this is important later) >lady looks like she is going to faint >her child is starting to cry >hear an argument outside >the tard and husband return stards left hand looks like its gone through nam >blood everywhere >yet in his right hand he is holding what seems to be a mangled tin of tuna >listen in on husbands explination >husband went out into carpark couldn't find him >went behind the clinic to see if tard hid around there >found tard with his hand wedged in industrial aircon fan >tard had smashed the protective cover off the fan to try and use it to open unexplained tuna husband pulls tard hand out of the machine >asks tard where he's been and where he got the tuna stard had grabbed the pills and jellybeans and swapped them to passing black people for tuna >nearly died laughing after hearing this luckily was called into the doctor >mfw police are arresting the tard as i leave and the waiting room looks like a Tarantino film
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:37:17 No.615144826 >sitting in clinic this afternoon >small family with a middle age downs tard sitting with them >the mother starts getting pale >asks tard to quickly go to the car to grab her medicine and some jellybeans stard grabs keys and runs time passes >half an hour goes by >the mum is getting super pale staff ask if she is okay stells staff shes "giving her brother responsibility" or something along those lines >staff can't do anything as she has basically refused treatment >another 15 mins goes by and her husband offers to go find tard >she flares up and starts raging about how he never gives her brother a chance to do something >husband leaves anyway to find him >by this time a full hour has passed sthe airconditioning in the building has also stopped working (this is important later) >lady looks like she is going to faint >her child is starting to cry >hear an argument outside >the tard and husband return stards left hand looks like its gone through nam >blood everywhere >yet in his right hand he is holding what seems to be a mangled tin of tuna >listen in on husbands explination >husband went out into carpark couldn't find him >went behind the clinic to see if tard hid around there >found tard with his hand wedged in industrial aircon fan >tard had smashed the protective cover off the fan to try and use it to open unexplained tuna husband pulls tard hand out of the machine >asks tard where he's been and where he got the tuna stard had grabbed the pills and jellybeans and swapped them to passing black people for tuna >nearly died laughing after hearing this luckily was called into the doctor >mfw police are arresting the tard as i leave and the waiting room looks like a Tarantino film

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Donovan... I got nothing

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:30:26 No.615144012 >Be me >Be in high school >sitting in gym one day waiting for the teacher this one tard named donovan >donovan gets up and goes to the sports equipment closet >he throws out everything and gets out a big exercise ball >Donovan bounces around shrieking like a total moron >He falls off >Some kid laughs at him and says "F--" >donovan grabs a jumprope and wraps it around the kids neck >the kid is strugguling as donovan chokes more tightly the teacher walks in >Donvan imediatley lets go and runs out into the hallway into the girls bathroom >The teacher follows but calls the female guidance counseler to get him out >The rest of us watch >we hear a loud scream as the counseler leaves covering her face and running back to her office >Tard wrangalers show up >Donovan bolts out of the bathroom >Tard wranglers can't catch him >school goes on lockdown as donovan roam s the hallways shrieking watch from the gym window as he runs back and fourth >l see him running with a pair of scissors >Oh god hear a really loud scream. louder than anything I've heard that day >everyone walks outsideto see what happened >the school psychologist is bleeding with scissors shoved in her stomach > several men walk in. (I dont know if they were wranglers or police or some kind of service funded by the institution) >They tranquilize donovan and remove him as the paramedics arrive to take care of the school counselor
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:30:26 No.615144012 >Be me >Be in high school >sitting in gym one day waiting for the teacher this one tard named donovan >donovan gets up and goes to the sports equipment closet >he throws out everything and gets out a big exercise ball >Donovan bounces around shrieking like a total moron >He falls off >Some kid laughs at him and says "F--" >donovan grabs a jumprope and wraps it around the kids neck >the kid is strugguling as donovan chokes more tightly the teacher walks in >Donvan imediatley lets go and runs out into the hallway into the girls bathroom >The teacher follows but calls the female guidance counseler to get him out >The rest of us watch >we hear a loud scream as the counseler leaves covering her face and running back to her office >Tard wrangalers show up >Donovan bolts out of the bathroom >Tard wranglers can't catch him >school goes on lockdown as donovan roam s the hallways shrieking watch from the gym window as he runs back and fourth >l see him running with a pair of scissors >Oh god hear a really loud scream. louder than anything I've heard that day >everyone walks outsideto see what happened >the school psychologist is bleeding with scissors shoved in her stomach > several men walk in. (I dont know if they were wranglers or police or some kind of service funded by the institution) >They tranquilize donovan and remove him as the paramedics arrive to take care of the school counselor

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Shit end of the genetics stick.

Alright, let's do this s--- >High School during lunch in the cafeteria >Me and my friend are in line for some m-----------' pizza, bitch >All of a sudden, like some kind of parade of people who got the s--- end of the genetics stick, the special ed class rolls on in the place >These people are SUPER retarded. If you've ever had to spend lots of time around retards you probably have observed there are certain levels of retard. Well these kids were the retards amongst retards >Me and my friend try to ignore them while waiting for our s----- school pizza but one of them, a f------ fat ginger kid is right behind me yelling IWANT CHEESE!" in his mangled retard English >Me and my friend continue to ignore him >As we go up to get our pizza one of the lunch ladies hands retardo a slice of cheese pizza >He completely freaks the f--- out because of this >He takes off his shirt revealing his gigantic f------ moobs and starts swinging it around going "AUGH! AUGH! AUGHI AUGH! >He then throws the pizza right at this hot blonde girl behind us >He then freezes as if he's just realized what he's done >He then turms very red and farts f------ loudly >He starts crying >Tuns out he actually s--- himself as when his retard tamer was ushering him away watery s--- was sliding down his legs >mfw during this entire ordeal
Alright, let's do this s--- >High School during lunch in the cafeteria >Me and my friend are in line for some m-----------' pizza, bitch >All of a sudden, like some kind of parade of people who got the s--- end of the genetics stick, the special ed class rolls on in the place >These people are SUPER retarded. If you've ever had to spend lots of time around retards you probably have observed there are certain levels of retard. Well these kids were the retards amongst retards >Me and my friend try to ignore them while waiting for our s----- school pizza but one of them, a f------ fat ginger kid is right behind me yelling IWANT CHEESE!" in his mangled retard English >Me and my friend continue to ignore him >As we go up to get our pizza one of the lunch ladies hands retardo a slice of cheese pizza >He completely freaks the f--- out because of this >He takes off his shirt revealing his gigantic f------ moobs and starts swinging it around going "AUGH! AUGH! AUGHI AUGH! >He then throws the pizza right at this hot blonde girl behind us >He then freezes as if he's just realized what he's done >He then turms very red and farts f------ loudly >He starts crying >Tuns out he actually s--- himself as when his retard tamer was ushering him away watery s--- was sliding down his legs >mfw during this entire ordeal

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Sounds like he cut it close!

#50-ishallsmiteyou 01/03/2014) You guys are gonna love my story. >be grade 10 in woodshop class, working with a table saw >School has quite a large population of autistic kids, always causing trouble >Hear screaming and thumping outside, but dont pay much attention to it >suddenly door bursts open raptard roar completely drowns out sound of all machinery raptard immediately runs at me duck >he flies over me and onto the table saw >saw lops off a part of his skull >he gets carried away on a stretcher never heard from or seen again
#50-ishallsmiteyou 01/03/2014) You guys are gonna love my story. >be grade 10 in woodshop class, working with a table saw >School has quite a large population of autistic kids, always causing trouble >Hear screaming and thumping outside, but dont pay much attention to it >suddenly door bursts open raptard roar completely drowns out sound of all machinery raptard immediately runs at me duck >he flies over me and onto the table saw >saw lops off a part of his skull >he gets carried away on a stretcher never heard from or seen again

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Neal and Pil

□ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:28:07 No.392030503 Ok story story f neal. Sth gra >Be in AI class (it's like advanced s--- for smart kids) -The teachers decide it is a good idea for us to spend a day with the tard kids because we were ahead of schedule >I had never seen a tard previous to this encounter, so I didn't know what to expect >It seems to be a regular class room filled with ugly ass kids >Everybody is assigned their own personnel tard to talk to sI walk up to the tard and say Hello i'm phil I ge sOne fluent word, "haypil he says this whenever he is within thirty feet of me, and it becomes my only warning of the >Sit down and see he is cutting paper >Ask him what he's making >'what?" >The tard starts to make this screeching sound, the only thing I can compare it to is the sound of a f------ raptor >A fat downy tard runs up to us "STUOP ITTTT >Neal gets up and continues his raptard roar directly in her face >Downy tard goes batshit, engages tard strength and flips the entire table over Neal not only continues his tard roar but moves closer to downy child >Down kid just starts screaming and tries to run for the door, forgets to open it and smashes into it head first Neal silences his roar, sits down and continues cutting the paper as if nothing had happened Pg -Tardwranglers run in and retrieve Neal, and the downy child, they are both sent home And that my friends is the first of my many stories of neal. just tell me if you want more Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:47:37 No.392034629 After our first faithful encounter I hadn't seen Neal for a while, so this story takes place about 3 months after my story >Be walking down the hall with friends to lunch >Talking bout usual 5th grade s---, pokemon and what not >Hear a faint yet memorable voice >Don't answer, pretend I heard nothing due to the events of last time >Hear the sound yet again, except this time it is directly in my ear HAYPIL" He had just appeared on my side, he had to be atleast thirty or so feet in the other direction previoushy into play in I him "Hey Neal" (this s Wave >He extends a bag of cheetos he had in his hand in my direction "Wunt sum?" No thanks Neal" >My friend not knowing the kind of devastation Neal is capable of reaches over and grabs one of the cheetos out of >Neal looks up with pure >Oh f--- not again □ Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:48:08 No.392034761 raptard roard delibera >This one was in short bursts, it appears as if he has different roars for different situation >Friend says "what's wrong with him?" >Say nothing, as I do not want to feel Neals wrath >Friend backs away as Neal approaches chewing the cheeto >Neal lets out one last violent tard roar and hurls himself at my friend, knocking him over >He jams his hand into my friends mouth and retrieves the liquidy remnants of the cheeto while continuing his tard >Stands up and eats liquidy half eaten cheeto after silencing his roar >Tardwrangler comes speeding down hallway and grabs Neal by the wrist to pull him back to tardHQ >Waves at me "Buypil not a single ounce of regret or any emotion for that matter in his eyes wave at him in utter aw "Bye Neal" You Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:11:45 No.392040658 Neal Part 3: Battle of the Tards You see Neal mainly kept to him self, he did not like his tard kind. But he extremely dislike one tard name james, this is the first of their battles that I saw grade >New AI teacher is a very avid tard supporter >We are now going to help the tards out once a week for the entire year >I enter the tardHQ and see Neal in the corner >Hasn't grown an inch sense last year (turns out he will remain 5'0 for his entire life) >He looks as if he is in total concentration reading a book >I walk up to Neal "Hey bud whatcha reading toothy t >Sit next to him and look at the book SDr. Seuss a cat in the hat >I could tell he was a d--- from the first second I saw him snatches book out of neals hand >Tis buk is fur babbys v ut bac y yames >James holds it up above his head 'tak it suns Neal sounds his raptard screech >This is slightly different from his roar, it's soul effect is to piss off other tards >'Stup it nile tak yur dum buk late f Neal continues to approach with his fist above his head as far as he can reach con Crayons and s--- is being thrown, one tard is crawled into a ball in a puddle of piss >AI class is told to evacuate, I stay to watch imminent luls ears for dear life >He throws his mighty fist down into james nuts with the accumulative force of 1000 banhammers >James drops and begins to throw up on the "magic carpet Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:12:31 No.392040843 >Neal silences the screech, picks up the book james had stolen from him, and sits down to read it directly in james >butwhy jpg >He looks up at me with that toothy grin as I just stare >Tard wranglers bust in, one grabs me to bring me to safety, the others grab the debilitated james and Neal Neal screams after me I just watch as he is hulled off to the principles office, not giving a single bit of resistance >That day was known as N day up until I left for the highschool Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:32:49 No.392045038 Neal part 3 (someone archive this s--- please) Neal had been suspended for pulverizing James nuts >He's back now >I have started to look forward to our days helping the tards just because of Neal >Unfortunately it's not that day >Teacher says we have a tard coming to our class from now on cus the school has started new integration program Hello Neal" we said in unison as I waved Teacher lets him sit next to me cus he knows me James walks into class after him r.Jpg >James is introduced to class and is put at the same table as us just by luck We are starting water color painting right novw >Neal decides he wants to paint an apple, cus that's what I was painting James starts s--- with us because he's a d--- Neal ignores him because... well because he's f----- neal he doesn't give a f--- >James obviously angered by being ignored by me and Neal pours all of his paint onto my painting yur >Don't give a f---, but Neal sure as hell did >Commence raptard roar short burst mode (this is when I found out that short bursts means he's about to wreck s---) Neal throws all his paint right into james eyes as the class looks on in horror Cont. □ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:33:28 No.392045147 f--- this flood detection Stories of Neal cont James can't see s--- and Neal has not taken out skittles that I assume he had hid in the foreskin of his penis (I found out he's uncircumcised in a later incident) and begins pelting james with them >He's hurling these at mach 5 speeds into him James falls off of the stool he is sitting on and brings the girl sitting next to him along too Neal walks around the table, picks up the paint and slowly empties it onto both James and the girl (it is apparent that Neal does not give two s---- about civilian casualties) >The roar >Kids are all huddled into the comer aside from me, the two tards, and the poor girl caught in the mix >Teachers signals for tardwranglers waiting outside, james and Neal are picked up and taken from the classroom >Neal is in complete and utter peace while being carried away, he simply waves at me st And that was the end of the schools integration program after the girl who got wreckeds parents attempted to sue
□ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:28:07 No.392030503 Ok story story f neal. Sth gra >Be in AI class (it's like advanced s--- for smart kids) -The teachers decide it is a good idea for us to spend a day with the tard kids because we were ahead of schedule >I had never seen a tard previous to this encounter, so I didn't know what to expect >It seems to be a regular class room filled with ugly ass kids >Everybody is assigned their own personnel tard to talk to sI walk up to the tard and say Hello i'm phil I ge sOne fluent word, "haypil he says this whenever he is within thirty feet of me, and it becomes my only warning of the >Sit down and see he is cutting paper >Ask him what he's making >'what?" >The tard starts to make this screeching sound, the only thing I can compare it to is the sound of a f------ raptor >A fat downy tard runs up to us "STUOP ITTTT >Neal gets up and continues his raptard roar directly in her face >Downy tard goes batshit, engages tard strength and flips the entire table over Neal not only continues his tard roar but moves closer to downy child >Down kid just starts screaming and tries to run for the door, forgets to open it and smashes into it head first Neal silences his roar, sits down and continues cutting the paper as if nothing had happened Pg -Tardwranglers run in and retrieve Neal, and the downy child, they are both sent home And that my friends is the first of my many stories of neal. just tell me if you want more Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:47:37 No.392034629 After our first faithful encounter I hadn't seen Neal for a while, so this story takes place about 3 months after my story >Be walking down the hall with friends to lunch >Talking bout usual 5th grade s---, pokemon and what not >Hear a faint yet memorable voice >Don't answer, pretend I heard nothing due to the events of last time >Hear the sound yet again, except this time it is directly in my ear HAYPIL" He had just appeared on my side, he had to be atleast thirty or so feet in the other direction previoushy into play in I him "Hey Neal" (this s Wave >He extends a bag of cheetos he had in his hand in my direction "Wunt sum?" No thanks Neal" >My friend not knowing the kind of devastation Neal is capable of reaches over and grabs one of the cheetos out of >Neal looks up with pure >Oh f--- not again □ Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:48:08 No.392034761 raptard roard delibera >This one was in short bursts, it appears as if he has different roars for different situation >Friend says "what's wrong with him?" >Say nothing, as I do not want to feel Neals wrath >Friend backs away as Neal approaches chewing the cheeto >Neal lets out one last violent tard roar and hurls himself at my friend, knocking him over >He jams his hand into my friends mouth and retrieves the liquidy remnants of the cheeto while continuing his tard >Stands up and eats liquidy half eaten cheeto after silencing his roar >Tardwrangler comes speeding down hallway and grabs Neal by the wrist to pull him back to tardHQ >Waves at me "Buypil not a single ounce of regret or any emotion for that matter in his eyes wave at him in utter aw "Bye Neal" You Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:11:45 No.392040658 Neal Part 3: Battle of the Tards You see Neal mainly kept to him self, he did not like his tard kind. But he extremely dislike one tard name james, this is the first of their battles that I saw grade >New AI teacher is a very avid tard supporter >We are now going to help the tards out once a week for the entire year >I enter the tardHQ and see Neal in the corner >Hasn't grown an inch sense last year (turns out he will remain 5'0 for his entire life) >He looks as if he is in total concentration reading a book >I walk up to Neal "Hey bud whatcha reading toothy t >Sit next to him and look at the book SDr. Seuss a cat in the hat >I could tell he was a d--- from the first second I saw him snatches book out of neals hand >Tis buk is fur babbys v ut bac y yames >James holds it up above his head 'tak it suns Neal sounds his raptard screech >This is slightly different from his roar, it's soul effect is to piss off other tards >'Stup it nile tak yur dum buk late f Neal continues to approach with his fist above his head as far as he can reach con Crayons and s--- is being thrown, one tard is crawled into a ball in a puddle of piss >AI class is told to evacuate, I stay to watch imminent luls ears for dear life >He throws his mighty fist down into james nuts with the accumulative force of 1000 banhammers >James drops and begins to throw up on the "magic carpet Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:12:31 No.392040843 >Neal silences the screech, picks up the book james had stolen from him, and sits down to read it directly in james >butwhy jpg >He looks up at me with that toothy grin as I just stare >Tard wranglers bust in, one grabs me to bring me to safety, the others grab the debilitated james and Neal Neal screams after me I just watch as he is hulled off to the principles office, not giving a single bit of resistance >That day was known as N day up until I left for the highschool Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:32:49 No.392045038 Neal part 3 (someone archive this s--- please) Neal had been suspended for pulverizing James nuts >He's back now >I have started to look forward to our days helping the tards just because of Neal >Unfortunately it's not that day >Teacher says we have a tard coming to our class from now on cus the school has started new integration program Hello Neal" we said in unison as I waved Teacher lets him sit next to me cus he knows me James walks into class after him r.Jpg >James is introduced to class and is put at the same table as us just by luck We are starting water color painting right novw >Neal decides he wants to paint an apple, cus that's what I was painting James starts s--- with us because he's a d--- Neal ignores him because... well because he's f----- neal he doesn't give a f--- >James obviously angered by being ignored by me and Neal pours all of his paint onto my painting yur >Don't give a f---, but Neal sure as hell did >Commence raptard roar short burst mode (this is when I found out that short bursts means he's about to wreck s---) Neal throws all his paint right into james eyes as the class looks on in horror Cont. □ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:33:28 No.392045147 f--- this flood detection Stories of Neal cont James can't see s--- and Neal has not taken out skittles that I assume he had hid in the foreskin of his penis (I found out he's uncircumcised in a later incident) and begins pelting james with them >He's hurling these at mach 5 speeds into him James falls off of the stool he is sitting on and brings the girl sitting next to him along too Neal walks around the table, picks up the paint and slowly empties it onto both James and the girl (it is apparent that Neal does not give two s---- about civilian casualties) >The roar >Kids are all huddled into the comer aside from me, the two tards, and the poor girl caught in the mix >Teachers signals for tardwranglers waiting outside, james and Neal are picked up and taken from the classroom >Neal is in complete and utter peace while being carried away, he simply waves at me st And that was the end of the schools integration program after the girl who got wreckeds parents attempted to sue

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>OP has GF

■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:35:57 No.615136569 File: 1324947620270ipg (29 KB, 500x375) >2615136783 P> Some true OC for ya OP, tales from a britbong college... > Go to college, be seeing gf there (7/10, banged anyway) > College has special tard block for dealing with tards & to keep them away from non-tards however the canteen is shared > me + gfs lunch hours are a different times > she keeps telling me about this specific tard that keeps coming and sitting on her table at lunchtime > says nothing, stares at her, freaks her out > she complains to staff, nothing gets done > one day tard arrives, sits at table, staring > whips out c--- and starts hawin a wank > gf goes mental > "w-- you think you doing you f------ stupid spastic, are you retarded or what?" > punches him in face, staff arrive and break it up > she's hauled before the head of year > made to apologise to the tard for hitting him > gets a formal written warning for having called him "spastic and "retarded" when there were other spastic retards around to hear it.
■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:35:57 No.615136569 File: 1324947620270ipg (29 KB, 500x375) >2615136783 P> Some true OC for ya OP, tales from a britbong college... > Go to college, be seeing gf there (7/10, banged anyway) > College has special tard block for dealing with tards & to keep them away from non-tards however the canteen is shared > me + gfs lunch hours are a different times > she keeps telling me about this specific tard that keeps coming and sitting on her table at lunchtime > says nothing, stares at her, freaks her out > she complains to staff, nothing gets done > one day tard arrives, sits at table, staring > whips out c--- and starts hawin a wank > gf goes mental > "w-- you think you doing you f------ stupid spastic, are you retarded or what?" > punches him in face, staff arrive and break it up > she's hauled before the head of year > made to apologise to the tard for hitting him > gets a formal written warning for having called him "spastic and "retarded" when there were other spastic retards around to hear it.

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Home Ec, and toothpaste.

■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:01:50 No.615139931、 615140004 >Senior year in high school >accidentally put into home economics class, had to wait out >sit with a tard and three Mexican girls who mind their own business, speak Spanish to each other each day (it's Texas) >weird assignment, where one of us has to spoon-feed somebody with a blindfold and guess what it is >looks like mayonnaise, ranch dressing, toothpaste, etc >tard is the only one in group who wants to do the blindfold >Mexican girls don't want to feed him, so now I have to sl am now spoon-feeding a slobbering retard mayonnaise, trying not to vomit as he rolls it around in his blubbery cheeks, repeatedly guessing it wrong >eventually gives up, the toothpaste is next >have an idea to entertain myself >l feed him the toothpaste, his face puckers in disgust as he chews on toothpaste slowly, like it's some great culinary mystery >we all chuckle a bit, he gives up sl give him toothpaste again >doesn't notice it's the same, keeps chewing Pafter five spoons his mouth starts overflowing with toothpaste and slobber, he starts pushing out some with his tongue >my sides are burning with ashamed, suppressed laughter >Mexican girls are pissing themselves, can't even hold back >five minutes of this ohe's now overfowing with suds like a broken, menl challenged dishwasher >somehow, nobody else in room seeing this
■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:01:50 No.615139931、 615140004 >Senior year in high school >accidentally put into home economics class, had to wait out >sit with a tard and three Mexican girls who mind their own business, speak Spanish to each other each day (it's Texas) >weird assignment, where one of us has to spoon-feed somebody with a blindfold and guess what it is >looks like mayonnaise, ranch dressing, toothpaste, etc >tard is the only one in group who wants to do the blindfold >Mexican girls don't want to feed him, so now I have to sl am now spoon-feeding a slobbering retard mayonnaise, trying not to vomit as he rolls it around in his blubbery cheeks, repeatedly guessing it wrong >eventually gives up, the toothpaste is next >have an idea to entertain myself >l feed him the toothpaste, his face puckers in disgust as he chews on toothpaste slowly, like it's some great culinary mystery >we all chuckle a bit, he gives up sl give him toothpaste again >doesn't notice it's the same, keeps chewing Pafter five spoons his mouth starts overflowing with toothpaste and slobber, he starts pushing out some with his tongue >my sides are burning with ashamed, suppressed laughter >Mexican girls are pissing themselves, can't even hold back >five minutes of this ohe's now overfowing with suds like a broken, menl challenged dishwasher >somehow, nobody else in room seeing this

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Remington; alpha tard

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:51:03 No.6151 30557、22615130761 >my school was "progressive" and let the tards freely mingle with the normals >most of the tards were, well, tards >but one stood above the rest emington >The most alpha tard I've ever met, dude didn't give a single damn >l had swe were in art class, Remington kills the work, ask to use the class computer >Teach says veah, Remington goes on, nothing big >10 minutes pass, and suddenly, the class is filled with the sound of lusty moans every class with this he would do the most absurd things turn around, and see Remington watching hardcore hentai, in plain sight >everyone notices, no one says anything >how he got past the web filter, I don't know >finally, after what seemed like forever, the teacher asks him to please stop the video >Remington just looks back and asks "Why? > I bust out laughing, high five Remington, get yelled at for encouraging him. >Remington was my bro after that Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:52:45 No.6151307616151310342615131203 >Its lunch time, me and my circle are in the school courtyard >Remington usually is there first, but for some reason, he's late >eventually, he does show up, a little out of breath and in a fit of the giggles >l ask him what's up, he gets all serious >"Panties are real. >wat? > "Anon, panties are real." >he reaches into his pockets, and just pulls out two fistfulls of panties and shows me >"Real." >he laughs and runs off, throwing panties into the crowd, causing a panio stard wranglers rush to the scene, but Remington gave them the slip, disappearing into the crowd >l dont see him until 8th period and halfway through the class, wranglers show up and take him away Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:54:55 No.615131034 22615131889 615130761 time to take the PSATs >get to the testing rooms, guess who's here >Remington Alright, at the time, I didn't know you needed some kinda identification to take the test. I left mine at home >start to panic, crap, it's over, man >ask teach, says it's fine, I just gotta get another person to verify who I am when they call attendance >ask Remington, he says okay sthey start attendance, and get to my name >"Who can verify this is Anon?" >Remington stands up and booms >THAT IS ANON, MY FELLOW OTAKU IN ARMS, FIGHTING FOR HIS FUTURE TODAY" >everyone is quiet except me, because I'm laughing my a off "IS MY WORD ENOUGH TO IDENTIFY MY COMRADE?" steacher is shaken, just replies with a soft "y-yes." "AFFIRMATIVE! PLEASE PROCEED, SENSEI steach tries to continue, Remington shoots me a thumbs up and wink. Could barely finish my test, was too busy holding my sides together Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:01:11 No.615131889 2-615132802 Ps Pin swe're supposed to be doing laps, but teach doesn't give a damn, lets us do whatever. >I'm hanging out with Remington and a few of my bros in the shade, watching the girls play tennis >out of nowhere, Remington says, "I wanna play tennis." >l try to convince him he cant, the girls are playing, they dont want us there, etc >Remington is having none of it, he just walks to the court >5 minutes later, he comes back. >They won't let you play, huh? >They said I need a partner, but no one wants to partner with me." >he said it in a completely flat voice like normal, but I felt for the dude >"Hey, Remington, I'll be your partner >"Reallv, anon?" Just a note, I had absolutely no idea how to play Tennis, but I couldn't leave my tard buddy hanging >we walk to the court, and all eyes are on us sthe coach obviously told him he needed a partner as an excuse to let him not play mean, who would partner with a tard? >anyway, we get set up with the gear, and get in position, they let us serve, cuz tard >Remington serves the ball with the force of a thousand Sunny D's, gets us our first point >he single-handedly destroys them, me being a partner only in name safterwards, they demand a rematch, but Remington brushes them off, says he's bored >he spends the rest of PE drawing in the dirt with a stick and talking about WWIl Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:08:13 No.615132802 >2615133327 >>615133334 >-615140280 615131889 >its lunchtime, Remington is where we usually meet, only this time, someone's with him. >it's this chick with huge bazongas "Anon, meet ma woman." >she waves and says hi, voice gives her away for total mental tard, just gutter noise >everyone show up, Remington introduces her to everyone, everything is normal FF 20 minutes >we're done eating, just talking, and I notice Remington kissing his girl >l decide to cheer him on as a joke, boost his confidence instead >my friends join in, cheer him on as wel >That's when he started to hit second base and put his hand down her pants lolwut >everyone is quiet now, but Remington keeps going and pulls out her t--- >won't lie, pretty nice t--- for a tard >at this point, a small crowd has shown up, and is just losing it >Remington decides fak it" and whips out his dong and just starts stroking >did I forget to mention that his tard queen is just making noises like she's in heat this entire time? stard wranglers hit the scene, but Remington will not be denied >he fights them with his tard strength, lays out one dude >eventually, they take him down, and drag him away, still erect
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:51:03 No.6151 30557、22615130761 >my school was "progressive" and let the tards freely mingle with the normals >most of the tards were, well, tards >but one stood above the rest emington >The most alpha tard I've ever met, dude didn't give a single damn >l had swe were in art class, Remington kills the work, ask to use the class computer >Teach says veah, Remington goes on, nothing big >10 minutes pass, and suddenly, the class is filled with the sound of lusty moans every class with this he would do the most absurd things turn around, and see Remington watching hardcore hentai, in plain sight >everyone notices, no one says anything >how he got past the web filter, I don't know >finally, after what seemed like forever, the teacher asks him to please stop the video >Remington just looks back and asks "Why? > I bust out laughing, high five Remington, get yelled at for encouraging him. >Remington was my bro after that Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:52:45 No.6151307616151310342615131203 >Its lunch time, me and my circle are in the school courtyard >Remington usually is there first, but for some reason, he's late >eventually, he does show up, a little out of breath and in a fit of the giggles >l ask him what's up, he gets all serious >"Panties are real. >wat? > "Anon, panties are real." >he reaches into his pockets, and just pulls out two fistfulls of panties and shows me >"Real." >he laughs and runs off, throwing panties into the crowd, causing a panio stard wranglers rush to the scene, but Remington gave them the slip, disappearing into the crowd >l dont see him until 8th period and halfway through the class, wranglers show up and take him away Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:54:55 No.615131034 22615131889 615130761 time to take the PSATs >get to the testing rooms, guess who's here >Remington Alright, at the time, I didn't know you needed some kinda identification to take the test. I left mine at home >start to panic, crap, it's over, man >ask teach, says it's fine, I just gotta get another person to verify who I am when they call attendance >ask Remington, he says okay sthey start attendance, and get to my name >"Who can verify this is Anon?" >Remington stands up and booms >THAT IS ANON, MY FELLOW OTAKU IN ARMS, FIGHTING FOR HIS FUTURE TODAY" >everyone is quiet except me, because I'm laughing my a off "IS MY WORD ENOUGH TO IDENTIFY MY COMRADE?" steacher is shaken, just replies with a soft "y-yes." "AFFIRMATIVE! PLEASE PROCEED, SENSEI steach tries to continue, Remington shoots me a thumbs up and wink. Could barely finish my test, was too busy holding my sides together Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:01:11 No.615131889 2-615132802 Ps Pin swe're supposed to be doing laps, but teach doesn't give a damn, lets us do whatever. >I'm hanging out with Remington and a few of my bros in the shade, watching the girls play tennis >out of nowhere, Remington says, "I wanna play tennis." >l try to convince him he cant, the girls are playing, they dont want us there, etc >Remington is having none of it, he just walks to the court >5 minutes later, he comes back. >They won't let you play, huh? >They said I need a partner, but no one wants to partner with me." >he said it in a completely flat voice like normal, but I felt for the dude >"Hey, Remington, I'll be your partner >"Reallv, anon?" Just a note, I had absolutely no idea how to play Tennis, but I couldn't leave my tard buddy hanging >we walk to the court, and all eyes are on us sthe coach obviously told him he needed a partner as an excuse to let him not play mean, who would partner with a tard? >anyway, we get set up with the gear, and get in position, they let us serve, cuz tard >Remington serves the ball with the force of a thousand Sunny D's, gets us our first point >he single-handedly destroys them, me being a partner only in name safterwards, they demand a rematch, but Remington brushes them off, says he's bored >he spends the rest of PE drawing in the dirt with a stick and talking about WWIl Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:08:13 No.615132802 >2615133327 >>615133334 >-615140280 615131889 >its lunchtime, Remington is where we usually meet, only this time, someone's with him. >it's this chick with huge bazongas "Anon, meet ma woman." >she waves and says hi, voice gives her away for total mental tard, just gutter noise >everyone show up, Remington introduces her to everyone, everything is normal FF 20 minutes >we're done eating, just talking, and I notice Remington kissing his girl >l decide to cheer him on as a joke, boost his confidence instead >my friends join in, cheer him on as wel >That's when he started to hit second base and put his hand down her pants lolwut >everyone is quiet now, but Remington keeps going and pulls out her t--- >won't lie, pretty nice t--- for a tard >at this point, a small crowd has shown up, and is just losing it >Remington decides fak it" and whips out his dong and just starts stroking >did I forget to mention that his tard queen is just making noises like she's in heat this entire time? stard wranglers hit the scene, but Remington will not be denied >he fights them with his tard strength, lays out one dude >eventually, they take him down, and drag him away, still erect

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