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Owen Carry • 6 days ago

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Tifa making an appearance at the Italian Senate during a livestream from the government.

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Greentext Stories - Images (46,936 results)

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Seriously, what was his problem with his completely innocuous colleague? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Why the hate boner? O.R.E OR EDUCATION 09/01/24(Sun)18:58:40 No.203122107 PLEA Clea CLO E Muddafucka.jpg 144 KB JPG >Suprise muddafucka, new case. Ok- >Stfu Morgan, get in there and analyze those blood splatters you sick s--- f---. Im watching you. Ok- >Creepy ass muddafucka, I know you get off to this s---. Eveyone thinks you're good at what you do, but Im on to you, c----sucking freak. Okay Seargent Do- >Stfu and do your job. Im watching you W-- was his problem?
Anonymous Why the hate boner? O.R.E OR EDUCATION 09/01/24(Sun)18:58:40 No.203122107 PLEA Clea CLO E Muddafucka.jpg 144 KB JPG >Suprise muddafucka, new case. Ok- >Stfu Morgan, get in there and analyze those blood splatters you sick s--- f---. Im watching you. Ok- >Creepy ass muddafucka, I know you get off to this s---. Eveyone thinks you're good at what you do, but Im on to you, c----sucking freak. Okay Seargent Do- >Stfu and do your job. Im watching you W-- was his problem?

Greentext Stories

Anon its having dirty thoughts about Elizabeth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/14/24(Sun)00:56:23 No.682657204 a35944bc8512e305e4244bab24e1865d.jpg 119 KB JPG >b-but you're my daughter...
: Anonymous 07/14/24(Sun)00:56:23 No.682657204 a35944bc8512e305e4244bab24e1865d.jpg 119 KB JPG >b-but you're my daughter...

Greentext Stories

Anon catches terminal cuckorrhea | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 195 KB PNG someone, it's ok! 11/18/24(Mon)03:59:49 No.927534091 > be diagnosed with stage 4b testicular cancer > terminal 6-18 months > can't have sex with wife anymore > sad she will be alone once I'm gone > tell her she needs to try to find > she gets dating apps, goes on some dates, has a hard time > I console and encourage her > she goes on a few more and says she's been on 3 with the same guy > she seems happy > wants me to meet him > have the most awkward 3rd wheel experience ever > immediate regret, but I want her to be happy > she spends a few nights at his house > i don't have the will or courage to ask her to stop Dying and cucked...
Anonymous 195 KB PNG someone, it's ok! 11/18/24(Mon)03:59:49 No.927534091 > be diagnosed with stage 4b testicular cancer > terminal 6-18 months > can't have sex with wife anymore > sad she will be alone once I'm gone > tell her she needs to try to find > she gets dating apps, goes on some dates, has a hard time > I console and encourage her > she goes on a few more and says she's been on 3 with the same guy > she seems happy > wants me to meet him > have the most awkward 3rd wheel experience ever > immediate regret, but I want her to be happy > she spends a few nights at his house > i don't have the will or courage to ask her to stop Dying and cucked...

Greentext Stories

He really was the best choice | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/11/25(Fri)10:52:16 No.715145340 32523451131351.png 215 KB PNG >Give me 20 years and I'll reignite the high technology development sectors. 50 years and I'll have people in orbit. 100 years and my colony ships will be heading for the stars to search for planets unpolluted by the wrath and folly of a bygone generation. What I'm offering you is a ground floor opportunity in the most important enterprise on earth. What I'm offering is a future - for you, and for what remains of the human race.
Anonymous 07/11/25(Fri)10:52:16 No.715145340 32523451131351.png 215 KB PNG >Give me 20 years and I'll reignite the high technology development sectors. 50 years and I'll have people in orbit. 100 years and my colony ships will be heading for the stars to search for planets unpolluted by the wrath and folly of a bygone generation. What I'm offering you is a ground floor opportunity in the most important enterprise on earth. What I'm offering is a future - for you, and for what remains of the human race.

Greentext Stories

Anon receives guidance | /r/Greentext

5h (7/6 19:44) - 71510310 JPG 43KB (1024x1024) 1613510906010.jpg 5 Replies back when I was first starting, like 4 months in >at my gym there was always this super jacked black guy that would put up huge numbers >everytime he's done with his set he yells out "0000000 BABY" >it was never obnoxious or anything, I found it funny >he catches me smirking at him after he did it once >he tells me that it helps with the next set >I laugh >a few weeks pass and I'm on a hard set of deadlifts >was still doing stronglifts so these are my max >push through them and for some reason yell out "000000 BABY" >I hear "DAS RIGHT" from across the gym >my next was easier Thank you jacked black man
5h (7/6 19:44) - 71510310 JPG 43KB (1024x1024) 1613510906010.jpg 5 Replies back when I was first starting, like 4 months in >at my gym there was always this super jacked black guy that would put up huge numbers >everytime he's done with his set he yells out "0000000 BABY" >it was never obnoxious or anything, I found it funny >he catches me smirking at him after he did it once >he tells me that it helps with the next set >I laugh >a few weeks pass and I'm on a hard set of deadlifts >was still doing stronglifts so these are my max >push through them and for some reason yell out "000000 BABY" >I hear "DAS RIGHT" from across the gym >my next was easier Thank you jacked black man

Greentext Stories

Anon watches Naruto | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: QTrsNuoC Naruto is a Fascist Nationalis(...) 07/10/25(Thu)23:49:44 No.510016635 Abandoning one's nation, and abandoning one's village... It's the same as abandoning one's child. 1614617613443.jpg 50 KB JPG >Will of Fire Literally Nationalism >Hokage Militaristic Dictator who ordered his own soldiers the principle of Fuhrerprinzip >Kekkei Genkai Literally f------ Eugenics >Danzo Glownigger psyop leader killed by Based Uncle Tom >Uchiha N------ >Zetsu F------ Jew, literally manipulated villages to kill each other and conspired many ninja wars Konoha trained f------ child soldiers and brainwashed them with a Nationalist Ideology (Will of Fire) so hard that everything they f------ do is a collective. Even naruto, a f------ bullied minority became a hardcore nationalist because Sarutobi and Iruka brainwashed his head with Racist Nationalist Ideology (Will of Fire) Naruto is a FASCIST NATIONALIST ANIME
Anonymous (ID: QTrsNuoC Naruto is a Fascist Nationalis(...) 07/10/25(Thu)23:49:44 No.510016635 Abandoning one's nation, and abandoning one's village... It's the same as abandoning one's child. 1614617613443.jpg 50 KB JPG >Will of Fire Literally Nationalism >Hokage Militaristic Dictator who ordered his own soldiers the principle of Fuhrerprinzip >Kekkei Genkai Literally f------ Eugenics >Danzo Glownigger psyop leader killed by Based Uncle Tom >Uchiha N------ >Zetsu F------ Jew, literally manipulated villages to kill each other and conspired many ninja wars Konoha trained f------ child soldiers and brainwashed them with a Nationalist Ideology (Will of Fire) so hard that everything they f------ do is a collective. Even naruto, a f------ bullied minority became a hardcore nationalist because Sarutobi and Iruka brainwashed his head with Racist Nationalist Ideology (Will of Fire) Naruto is a FASCIST NATIONALIST ANIME

Greentext Stories

Spread a tad thin. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: ulX0Ruyl ) The IDF Is Collapsing In Real (...) Security Fighters' anger over attempt to extend their service: "A strong sense of unfairness, we are being "taken advantage of The son the etenim of service base the 11-11 4-1- finding the "The been going on for a long they only fios n Chief of Staff Eyal Zamir ordered 529 KB PNG 07/13/25(Sun)12:14:42 No.510291657 >IDF is a reservist-centric army. >Designed for short wars and back to regular life >20 months into an endless war >In May the IDF tried a new mass mobilization of the reservists for new huge Gaza Operation >70% of the IDF reservists refused to go back >IDF then "recruited" only the reservists who they knew were willing to serve >IDF then fake-announces that 90% of the reservists volunteered for their 4th or 5th tour of Gaza. >#LOL >Iran War was started as a big distraction from IDF crisis >But IDF still got absolutely wrecked in Gaza, due to distraction of the Iran War. >Now the IDF/Trump are planning huge Gaza Operation for September >But first they desperately need a 2 month cease-fire with Hamas in Gaza, to re-group and prepare, and to mass kidnap IDF reservists off the streets >Which was just made legal, btw >IDF special forces were just forced to serve another full year. >Same order is being given to every IDF conscripted soldier (18-22 years old kids) >IDF special forces and regular soldiers are starting to chimp out and go public with their chimp outs >Because the Ultra-Orthodox are still able to dodge the IDF draft >Because the Ultra-O politicians can and will shut down the whole Israeli government if the goyim-Jews get uppity >Entire IDF is totally disgruntled, exhausted, demoralized, under-staffed, over-worked, and completely and utterly non- functional. >And the Ultra-Orthodox still plan to shut down the whole Israeli government next week, lol. 43 Replies / 10 Images View Thread
Anonymous (ID: ulX0Ruyl ) The IDF Is Collapsing In Real (...) Security Fighters' anger over attempt to extend their service: "A strong sense of unfairness, we are being "taken advantage of The son the etenim of service base the 11-11 4-1- finding the "The been going on for a long they only fios n Chief of Staff Eyal Zamir ordered 529 KB PNG 07/13/25(Sun)12:14:42 No.510291657 >IDF is a reservist-centric army. >Designed for short wars and back to regular life >20 months into an endless war >In May the IDF tried a new mass mobilization of the reservists for new huge Gaza Operation >70% of the IDF reservists refused to go back >IDF then "recruited" only the reservists who they knew were willing to serve >IDF then fake-announces that 90% of the reservists volunteered for their 4th or 5th tour of Gaza. >#LOL >Iran War was started as a big distraction from IDF crisis >But IDF still got absolutely wrecked in Gaza, due to distraction of the Iran War. >Now the IDF/Trump are planning huge Gaza Operation for September >But first they desperately need a 2 month cease-fire with Hamas in Gaza, to re-group and prepare, and to mass kidnap IDF reservists off the streets >Which was just made legal, btw >IDF special forces were just forced to serve another full year. >Same order is being given to every IDF conscripted soldier (18-22 years old kids) >IDF special forces and regular soldiers are starting to chimp out and go public with their chimp outs >Because the Ultra-Orthodox are still able to dodge the IDF draft >Because the Ultra-O politicians can and will shut down the whole Israeli government if the goyim-Jews get uppity >Entire IDF is totally disgruntled, exhausted, demoralized, under-staffed, over-worked, and completely and utterly non- functional. >And the Ultra-Orthodox still plan to shut down the whole Israeli government next week, lol. 43 Replies / 10 Images View Thread

Greentext Stories

Mexicanon hates Elon Musk | /r/Greentext

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Anonymous (ID: IQFgEbFO ) Settings Mobile Home 07/13/25(Sun)14:00:25 No.510285521 51 KB JPG F--- p--- Trump. It's a good time to join the American party. Anonymous (ID: 1iVVW/Cs) [*] >>510285521 (OP). 07/13/25(Sun)14:06:45 No.510286005 Yeah, lets promote the party of the katamine-addicted, union-busting, 6-times-divorced, fake-gamer manchild Musk should f--- off to Mars and die Anonymous (ID: IQFgEbFO) >>510286005 He's based tho 07/13/25(Sun)14:07:21 No.510286049
Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Anonymous (ID: IQFgEbFO ) Settings Mobile Home 07/13/25(Sun)14:00:25 No.510285521 51 KB JPG F--- p--- Trump. It's a good time to join the American party. Anonymous (ID: 1iVVW/Cs) [*] >>510285521 (OP). 07/13/25(Sun)14:06:45 No.510286005 Yeah, lets promote the party of the katamine-addicted, union-busting, 6-times-divorced, fake-gamer manchild Musk should f--- off to Mars and die Anonymous (ID: IQFgEbFO) >>510286005 He's based tho 07/13/25(Sun)14:07:21 No.510286049

Greentext Stories

Lost in L-Space | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/05/22(Mon)14:36:34 No.4294466 You enter a white room. To your left is a beautiful woman made lawful to you, to your right is an orangutan with a xylophone. You can only spend 24 with one of them, who do you choose? >>4294468 # >>4294509 # >>4296477 # Anonymous >>4294466 # 09/08/22(Thu)00:31:15 No.4296477 There is one answer, and no other. Let me paint you a picture. >you enter a white room, nothing inside but two doors. >one labeled "beautiful woman", other "xylophone Orangutan❞ >you go into the "beautiful woman" door, 24 hours of non stop nagging about random s---. >go into orangutan door, the hippest primate you ever did see is staring at you >the only thing in his eyes is pure happiness at what's in front of him >you both jam out together, taking turns on the xylophone >you bid him a-due, and say your eternal goodbyes. >you remember him fondly for years to come >one day, your in a dark alleyway, and getting mugged >suddenly, you hear the sounds of a xylophone. >your mugger is knocked down with the force of 1000 notes >"you saved my life all those years ago, now I save yours, Ooo ah ah" >you shed a tear
Anonymous 09/05/22(Mon)14:36:34 No.4294466 You enter a white room. To your left is a beautiful woman made lawful to you, to your right is an orangutan with a xylophone. You can only spend 24 with one of them, who do you choose? >>4294468 # >>4294509 # >>4296477 # Anonymous >>4294466 # 09/08/22(Thu)00:31:15 No.4296477 There is one answer, and no other. Let me paint you a picture. >you enter a white room, nothing inside but two doors. >one labeled "beautiful woman", other "xylophone Orangutan❞ >you go into the "beautiful woman" door, 24 hours of non stop nagging about random s---. >go into orangutan door, the hippest primate you ever did see is staring at you >the only thing in his eyes is pure happiness at what's in front of him >you both jam out together, taking turns on the xylophone >you bid him a-due, and say your eternal goodbyes. >you remember him fondly for years to come >one day, your in a dark alleyway, and getting mugged >suddenly, you hear the sounds of a xylophone. >your mugger is knocked down with the force of 1000 notes >"you saved my life all those years ago, now I save yours, Ooo ah ah" >you shed a tear

Greentext Stories

Canadian Coke | /r/Greentext

Settings Mobile Home Board /int/ - International Anonymous PAPPAA 07/13/25(Sun)15:04:45 No.212731373 2.0- ca-Cola ZERO SUGAR NO CALORIES SPECIALLY SELECTED 100% PURE Canadian Maple Syrup GRADE A 851 KB PNG So, /int/. Dare I mix the grade a maple syrup with coke zero? Anonymous 07/13/25(Sun)15:06:21 No.212731439 Even as an Amerifat I think you're going too far
Settings Mobile Home Board /int/ - International Anonymous PAPPAA 07/13/25(Sun)15:04:45 No.212731373 2.0- ca-Cola ZERO SUGAR NO CALORIES SPECIALLY SELECTED 100% PURE Canadian Maple Syrup GRADE A 851 KB PNG So, /int/. Dare I mix the grade a maple syrup with coke zero? Anonymous 07/13/25(Sun)15:06:21 No.212731439 Even as an Amerifat I think you're going too far

Greentext Stories

Can't Tame the Sun | /r/Greentext

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect ▼ Settings Mobile Home Anonymous (ID: QjwPLQtS 07/12/25(Sat) 09:12:00 No.510162284 Low adoption of air conditioning means Europe's death rates climb far more steeply than America's during periods of intense heat Relative increase in mortality risk at different outdoor temperatures Athens vs Atlanta GA Barcelona vs Frankfurt vs Los Angeles CA Boston MA 150% 100% 50% 0% 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 50F 68F 86F Lisbon vs London vs Madrid vs San Jose CA Portland OR Reno NV 150% 100% 50% 0% 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C Paris vs Rome vs Eugene OR Sacramento CA Turin vs Detroit MI 150% 100% 50% 0% 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 50F 68F 86F Source: Adapted from Chen et al, 2024. City pairings are based on the annual number of days at each location exceeding 28C/82F FT graphic: John Burn-Murdoch / @jburnmurdoch OFT RDT_20250712_0654547309227082136745150.jpg 341 KB JPG >We dont need air cond-ACK!! Yes you do.
Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect ▼ Settings Mobile Home Anonymous (ID: QjwPLQtS 07/12/25(Sat) 09:12:00 No.510162284 Low adoption of air conditioning means Europe's death rates climb far more steeply than America's during periods of intense heat Relative increase in mortality risk at different outdoor temperatures Athens vs Atlanta GA Barcelona vs Frankfurt vs Los Angeles CA Boston MA 150% 100% 50% 0% 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 50F 68F 86F Lisbon vs London vs Madrid vs San Jose CA Portland OR Reno NV 150% 100% 50% 0% 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C Paris vs Rome vs Eugene OR Sacramento CA Turin vs Detroit MI 150% 100% 50% 0% 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 10C 20C 30C 50F 68F 86F Source: Adapted from Chen et al, 2024. City pairings are based on the annual number of days at each location exceeding 28C/82F FT graphic: John Burn-Murdoch / @jburnmurdoch OFT RDT_20250712_0654547309227082136745150.jpg 341 KB JPG >We dont need air cond-ACK!! Yes you do.

Greentext Stories

anon lives in 1984 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: MylTOR71)== MAKE AMERIC GREAT AGAIN 07/11/25(Fri)13:09:49 No.510105477 >Trump said stop talking about it >I trust him on this one 65 KB JPG
Anonymous (ID: MylTOR71)== MAKE AMERIC GREAT AGAIN 07/11/25(Fri)13:09:49 No.510105477 >Trump said stop talking about it >I trust him on this one 65 KB JPG

Greentext Stories

Help a brother in need | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 985 KB JPG 03/31/21(Wed)08:19:24 No.62989509 OFF'ing myself right now. Goodbye 4chan. >broke uni student >mother is meth head >dad is p--- >snooped through my younger sisters internet history and found t----- p--- >gf left me just 1 week ago >been drinking nonstop >grades are collapsing Thank you all for the amazing memories, I've treasured them. And thank you for always being. my favorite board. 23 Replies / 3 Images Anonymous View Thread 03/31/21(Wed)10:44:21 No.62990863 Bro I feel you... Could you maybe help a bro out and buy me gta3 on steam? I know you won't be needing that money after you die right?
: Anonymous 985 KB JPG 03/31/21(Wed)08:19:24 No.62989509 OFF'ing myself right now. Goodbye 4chan. >broke uni student >mother is meth head >dad is p--- >snooped through my younger sisters internet history and found t----- p--- >gf left me just 1 week ago >been drinking nonstop >grades are collapsing Thank you all for the amazing memories, I've treasured them. And thank you for always being. my favorite board. 23 Replies / 3 Images Anonymous View Thread 03/31/21(Wed)10:44:21 No.62990863 Bro I feel you... Could you maybe help a bro out and buy me gta3 on steam? I know you won't be needing that money after you die right?

Greentext Stories

A Woman Scorned | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 2.38 MB GIF >be >24 09/26/22(Mon)10:25:21 No.55342035 >catch gf cheating >break up two week later >cops at door serving a red flag warrant >half dozen dudes full kit >they take all my guns, bullets and reloading material >"looks like your ex said you posed a danger to yourself and her, sorry bud, hopefully the judge is understanding" >mfw I cant afford a lawyer to defend myself, anyone have experience with a court appointed attorney? How f----- am I or is it just a luck of the draw kinda thing with public defenders?
Anonymous 2.38 MB GIF >be >24 09/26/22(Mon)10:25:21 No.55342035 >catch gf cheating >break up two week later >cops at door serving a red flag warrant >half dozen dudes full kit >they take all my guns, bullets and reloading material >"looks like your ex said you posed a danger to yourself and her, sorry bud, hopefully the judge is understanding" >mfw I cant afford a lawyer to defend myself, anyone have experience with a court appointed attorney? How f----- am I or is it just a luck of the draw kinda thing with public defenders?

Greentext Stories

anon is schizophrenic | /r/Greentext

guards! take him away! 2.21 MB GIF I greatly improved my mood with one simple trick >started pretending I'm broadcasting my life to thousands of people >refer to chat in my head, like: "hey chat, that was pretty huh?" or make little jokes that chat reacts to >started having imaginary conversations with chat when I'm doing stuff on my computer, doing homework, etc, where I commentate and they make jokes about what I'm doing and give me advice >have occasional "vent streams" where I talk about my emotions and chat is really supportive, sometimes get really mean chatters who I just ban or ignore, most of them are very nice >if something bad or embarrassing happens, chat cheers me up by spamming funny emotes poking fun at me (but in a lighthearted way) and we talk about it after >really good banter Ever since implementing this, I'm just not sad anymore
guards! take him away! 2.21 MB GIF I greatly improved my mood with one simple trick >started pretending I'm broadcasting my life to thousands of people >refer to chat in my head, like: "hey chat, that was pretty huh?" or make little jokes that chat reacts to >started having imaginary conversations with chat when I'm doing stuff on my computer, doing homework, etc, where I commentate and they make jokes about what I'm doing and give me advice >have occasional "vent streams" where I talk about my emotions and chat is really supportive, sometimes get really mean chatters who I just ban or ignore, most of them are very nice >if something bad or embarrassing happens, chat cheers me up by spamming funny emotes poking fun at me (but in a lighthearted way) and we talk about it after >really good banter Ever since implementing this, I'm just not sad anymore

Greentext Stories

Anon asserts his dominance | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG 07/13/25(Sun)10:16:18 No.937042500 >be a 27 year old NEET >wake up at 6PM and roll out of my racecar bed >piss jugs are all full, have to use the toilet like some subhuman normie >waddle downstairs to find mummy for my wakey-wakey tendies and bakey >lights off, nobody there >there is a note on the refrigerator >"Pumpkin, your new daddy Leroy and I have gone to the movies for the afternoon I made some of your favorite chicken tenders, just heat them up in the microwave if you get hungry for num-nums. Love you, Mom" >f------ c--- has let my tendies get cold and mushy >and she expects me to heat them up myself like a slave >she will f------ learn today >change out of my cloth diaper into a disposable one and hit the road >spend the entire walk to the cinema filling my diapey with poo poo >arrive at the theater parking lot and coat myself in a thin layer of pee pee and poo >brace myself and enter the lobby >let loose my battle cry >RRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE >"MY PRECIOUS TENDIES HAVE GONE TO WASTE, NOW MY POOPY YOU SHALL TASTE" >pull handfuls of poop out of my diaper and fling them at random >staff tries to stop me but I am too quick and too slippery >entire venue is being evacuated >navigate my way to Superman >mummy and new daddy are in the back row >covered in poo and pee, two steaming loads in each hand >mummy's face is a mixture of shock and indescribable terror >walk slowly towards her while chanting "...tendies...tendies...tendies..." >our eyes are locked >as if from far away I hear new daddy say "ayo wut tha f--- this n-----" >cease my low chanting with a final "TENDIEEEEES" and smash the handfuls of rancid diarrhea onto either side of her head >bring my piss-soaked face right up to hers >her ears are filled with my poo, eardrums are ruptured, and eyes are nearly blinded by a mixture of tears and more poo >say very slowly and clearly >"Don't you ever f--- with my chicky tendies again" And the best part is the dumb w---- was too scared to even take away any of my good boy points
Anonymous 8 KB JPG 07/13/25(Sun)10:16:18 No.937042500 >be a 27 year old NEET >wake up at 6PM and roll out of my racecar bed >piss jugs are all full, have to use the toilet like some subhuman normie >waddle downstairs to find mummy for my wakey-wakey tendies and bakey >lights off, nobody there >there is a note on the refrigerator >"Pumpkin, your new daddy Leroy and I have gone to the movies for the afternoon I made some of your favorite chicken tenders, just heat them up in the microwave if you get hungry for num-nums. Love you, Mom" >f------ c--- has let my tendies get cold and mushy >and she expects me to heat them up myself like a slave >she will f------ learn today >change out of my cloth diaper into a disposable one and hit the road >spend the entire walk to the cinema filling my diapey with poo poo >arrive at the theater parking lot and coat myself in a thin layer of pee pee and poo >brace myself and enter the lobby >let loose my battle cry >RRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE >"MY PRECIOUS TENDIES HAVE GONE TO WASTE, NOW MY POOPY YOU SHALL TASTE" >pull handfuls of poop out of my diaper and fling them at random >staff tries to stop me but I am too quick and too slippery >entire venue is being evacuated >navigate my way to Superman >mummy and new daddy are in the back row >covered in poo and pee, two steaming loads in each hand >mummy's face is a mixture of shock and indescribable terror >walk slowly towards her while chanting "...tendies...tendies...tendies..." >our eyes are locked >as if from far away I hear new daddy say "ayo wut tha f--- this n-----" >cease my low chanting with a final "TENDIEEEEES" and smash the handfuls of rancid diarrhea onto either side of her head >bring my piss-soaked face right up to hers >her ears are filled with my poo, eardrums are ruptured, and eyes are nearly blinded by a mixture of tears and more poo >say very slowly and clearly >"Don't you ever f--- with my chicky tendies again" And the best part is the dumb w---- was too scared to even take away any of my good boy points

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