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Greentext Stories - Images (47,039 results)

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Anon wears tinted glasses | /r/Greentext

⠀ Anonymous (ID: ymFPndkB) [+] Diversity 07/18/25(Fri)14:24:18 No.510739075 >be me, hungry >decide to get shawarma >made by indians >get a sub >indians >burrito? >indians 8 KB JPG >indians >car needs oil change >literallly every store, service, and industry >indians What did canada mean by this? ⠀ Anonymous (ID: qklcdOEh) [+] 07/18/25(Fri)14:29:23 No.510739485 temporary foreign workers are the only way boomers can leech the last bit of profit in their businesses before they die ⠀ Anonymous (ID: ropx94zO) >>510739075 (OP) # 07/18/25(Fri)14:30:37 No.510739582 You should f------ do something about it. >>510739928 # Anonymous (ID: VfBgRMXB) >>510739075 (OP) # Irn to cook f-- 07/18/25(Fri)14:31:36 No.510739665
⠀ Anonymous (ID: ymFPndkB) [+] Diversity 07/18/25(Fri)14:24:18 No.510739075 >be me, hungry >decide to get shawarma >made by indians >get a sub >indians >burrito? >indians 8 KB JPG >indians >car needs oil change >literallly every store, service, and industry >indians What did canada mean by this? ⠀ Anonymous (ID: qklcdOEh) [+] 07/18/25(Fri)14:29:23 No.510739485 temporary foreign workers are the only way boomers can leech the last bit of profit in their businesses before they die ⠀ Anonymous (ID: ropx94zO) >>510739075 (OP) # 07/18/25(Fri)14:30:37 No.510739582 You should f------ do something about it. >>510739928 # Anonymous (ID: VfBgRMXB) >>510739075 (OP) # Irn to cook f-- 07/18/25(Fri)14:31:36 No.510739665

Greentext Stories

Anon goes to the bathroom | /r/Greentext

toiletmoviescreen.jpg (22 KB, 453x518) google yandex iqdb wait G Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)15:00:02 No.212859749 ▼ >take loud s---- >too embarrassed to do it next to someone >need good kino to cover up the sound of my explosive s---- what's a good noisy movie /tv/
toiletmoviescreen.jpg (22 KB, 453x518) google yandex iqdb wait G Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)15:00:02 No.212859749 ▼ >take loud s---- >too embarrassed to do it next to someone >need good kino to cover up the sound of my explosive s---- what's a good noisy movie /tv/

Greentext Stories

Anon grills Nintendo in 3 words | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)11:38:46 No.715805239 >instructions sold separately NINTENDO SWITCH 2 WELCOME. TOUR 152 KB JPG 33 Replies 4 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)11:38:46 No.715805239 >instructions sold separately NINTENDO SWITCH 2 WELCOME. TOUR 152 KB JPG 33 Replies 4 Images View Thread

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wat do we do? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: WdX+iW8D What do we do about the upcomi(...) We need to ban sexbots and sexual Al. And by ban, I mean label the men who use these products sexual predators. WPM-M 102t 30 Qualty T--- 3.4K 4 W 53 KB PNG 07/18/25(Fri)06:35:39 No.510711077 The deal between men and women since the dawn of civilization has been: women provide the sex, and men provide everything else. The rapid advancement of Al and robots threatens to undo this deal. You can tell this is true by the rabid reaction of every feminist when confronted with this question. Deep down, they understand that once sex is taken away from them, they have nothing of value left to offer. So let's see if /pol/ can come up with an answer: what do we do about the upcoming femcel epidemic? 120 Replies / 24 Images View Thread
Anonymous (ID: WdX+iW8D What do we do about the upcomi(...) We need to ban sexbots and sexual Al. And by ban, I mean label the men who use these products sexual predators. WPM-M 102t 30 Qualty T--- 3.4K 4 W 53 KB PNG 07/18/25(Fri)06:35:39 No.510711077 The deal between men and women since the dawn of civilization has been: women provide the sex, and men provide everything else. The rapid advancement of Al and robots threatens to undo this deal. You can tell this is true by the rabid reaction of every feminist when confronted with this question. Deep down, they understand that once sex is taken away from them, they have nothing of value left to offer. So let's see if /pol/ can come up with an answer: what do we do about the upcoming femcel epidemic? 120 Replies / 24 Images View Thread

Greentext Stories

Anon hates the elderly | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 54 KB JPG 07/18/25(Fri)18:03:48 No.937271625 i f------ hate customers. > 70 year old woman comes to my job (gas station) every week > buys 7$ of groceries. puts 7$ in quarters, pennies, nickels, and dimes on my counter "7." > have to painstakingly count them on the counter, put it in for her groceries "10" "what?" > she stares at me blankly "pardon me?" > she stares at me blankly. her mouth is hanging open. "do you want it on a pump?" > there are three people behind her. she stares at me blankly. she is breathing like a pug with incestuous parents and grandparents > get my manager. my manager has to take 10 minutes to pry out of this woman that she wants 10$ on pump 1, and apparently expected me to put the 7$ in change on pump 1 as well. i like my job. love my coworkers. i hope this woman dies 8 Replies 2 Images View Thread
Anonymous 54 KB JPG 07/18/25(Fri)18:03:48 No.937271625 i f------ hate customers. > 70 year old woman comes to my job (gas station) every week > buys 7$ of groceries. puts 7$ in quarters, pennies, nickels, and dimes on my counter "7." > have to painstakingly count them on the counter, put it in for her groceries "10" "what?" > she stares at me blankly "pardon me?" > she stares at me blankly. her mouth is hanging open. "do you want it on a pump?" > there are three people behind her. she stares at me blankly. she is breathing like a pug with incestuous parents and grandparents > get my manager. my manager has to take 10 minutes to pry out of this woman that she wants 10$ on pump 1, and apparently expected me to put the 7$ in change on pump 1 as well. i like my job. love my coworkers. i hope this woman dies 8 Replies 2 Images View Thread

Greentext Stories

Anon on situationships | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/16/25(Wed)07:55:29 No. 12408120 A girl with no father figure thinks attention is love. A man with no purpose thinks lust is connection. Put them together and you get a situationship, not a relationship.
: Anonymous 07/16/25(Wed)07:55:29 No. 12408120 A girl with no father figure thinks attention is love. A man with no purpose thinks lust is connection. Put them together and you get a situationship, not a relationship.

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anon is gay | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Sydney Sweeney 02/24/25(Mon) 15:27:28 No.208920796 download (5).jpg 109 KB JPG > Be Sydeny Sweeney >look like you have fetal alcohol syndrome > have no acting range >play the same disinterested California W---- with vocal fry in all your roles >Make 10 million a year doing the aforementioned >Bitch about not making enough money to support herself Why does Hollywood keeps casting this w----
: Anonymous Sydney Sweeney 02/24/25(Mon) 15:27:28 No.208920796 download (5).jpg 109 KB JPG > Be Sydeny Sweeney >look like you have fetal alcohol syndrome > have no acting range >play the same disinterested California W---- with vocal fry in all your roles >Make 10 million a year doing the aforementioned >Bitch about not making enough money to support herself Why does Hollywood keeps casting this w----

Greentext Stories

Anon gives a heads up | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/21/25(Sat) 10:57:01 No.81564561 EDDIT EASTERN 1.15 MB JPG Whenever you hear opinions such as: >you need to touch grass >visit a therapist >listen to women >work on yourself >stop blaming others then I just want you to remember that these are the people you're talking to.
Anonymous 06/21/25(Sat) 10:57:01 No.81564561 EDDIT EASTERN 1.15 MB JPG Whenever you hear opinions such as: >you need to touch grass >visit a therapist >listen to women >work on yourself >stop blaming others then I just want you to remember that these are the people you're talking to.

Greentext Stories

Anon wonders | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/11/23(Sat)11:44:23 No.657150776 DENER OPEN 24 HRS HOTE ROSWELL BOWL OLYM Wolfenstein-2.jpg 104 KB JPG >Game is supposed to depict a dystopic nightmare future >Streets are clean, buildings are pretty, and crime is low I don't get it
Anonymous 11/11/23(Sat)11:44:23 No.657150776 DENER OPEN 24 HRS HOTE ROSWELL BOWL OLYM Wolfenstein-2.jpg 104 KB JPG >Game is supposed to depict a dystopic nightmare future >Streets are clean, buildings are pretty, and crime is low I don't get it

Greentext Stories

He led elephants through mountains | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Hannibal Barca 02/07/24(Wed)12:57:24 No.16250073 225 KB JPG >born into an exhausted Carthage that's already been defeated once and lost control of the seas to Rome >leads a haphazard disorganized army full of various mercenaries and allied troops >nearly manages to kill prime Rome with it Was he the greatest military commander of all time?
Anonymous Hannibal Barca 02/07/24(Wed)12:57:24 No.16250073 225 KB JPG >born into an exhausted Carthage that's already been defeated once and lost control of the seas to Rome >leads a haphazard disorganized army full of various mercenaries and allied troops >nearly manages to kill prime Rome with it Was he the greatest military commander of all time?

Greentext Stories

Anon is an Ancient Macedonian soldier | /r/Greentext

#1 09:35:52 212844035 Why would you want back after being taken all over beyond the edges of the known world conquering people with an unstoppable leader? >waaah my goat farm and my fat greek wife are waiting for me Alexander!! 11 #2 09:39:58 212844123 >>212844035 (OP) Why would you want to go to India? 4 #9 11:31:14 212846129 >>212844035 (OP) >be me, Macedonian spear-chucker in Alexander's world-tour of whoop-ass, 330 BC > horny as Dionysus after a wine binge, ready to conquer more than just land >march into the Levant >succubus-tier Canaanite babes with bovine mammaries that could feed a whole taxis >local merchants crying into their flatbread, lactose intolerance blocking their shot at glory >my phalanx is not the only thing standing at attention, GIMME MORE >stomp into Egypt >nubile, coffee-skinned Nile queens, hips swaying in lusty Nilotic dances >short hair, dripping with lotus-scented sweat, beckoning me to board their riverboat of sin >erecting obelisks in my mind, camp's too small for this, NEED MORE >charge into Mesopotamia >Persian harem cuties in silk so sheer it's basically a war crime >sultry eyes through veils promising a night hotter than a ziggurat's fire altar >Alexander's out here burning Persepolis, I'm burning for these babes, MORE >ride into Bactria >nomadic tomboys, smeared in animal blood, grinning like they just wrestled a wolf >promise a wild, rapeful romp across the steppe, "ride or be ridden" vibes >my greaves are getting tight, heart's galloping, ONE MORE >reach India >we NEED to go back 6
#1 09:35:52 212844035 Why would you want back after being taken all over beyond the edges of the known world conquering people with an unstoppable leader? >waaah my goat farm and my fat greek wife are waiting for me Alexander!! 11 #2 09:39:58 212844123 >>212844035 (OP) Why would you want to go to India? 4 #9 11:31:14 212846129 >>212844035 (OP) >be me, Macedonian spear-chucker in Alexander's world-tour of whoop-ass, 330 BC > horny as Dionysus after a wine binge, ready to conquer more than just land >march into the Levant >succubus-tier Canaanite babes with bovine mammaries that could feed a whole taxis >local merchants crying into their flatbread, lactose intolerance blocking their shot at glory >my phalanx is not the only thing standing at attention, GIMME MORE >stomp into Egypt >nubile, coffee-skinned Nile queens, hips swaying in lusty Nilotic dances >short hair, dripping with lotus-scented sweat, beckoning me to board their riverboat of sin >erecting obelisks in my mind, camp's too small for this, NEED MORE >charge into Mesopotamia >Persian harem cuties in silk so sheer it's basically a war crime >sultry eyes through veils promising a night hotter than a ziggurat's fire altar >Alexander's out here burning Persepolis, I'm burning for these babes, MORE >ride into Bactria >nomadic tomboys, smeared in animal blood, grinning like they just wrestled a wolf >promise a wild, rapeful romp across the steppe, "ride or be ridden" vibes >my greaves are getting tight, heart's galloping, ONE MORE >reach India >we NEED to go back 6

Greentext Stories

Anon Has Low Hopes for Taika Waititi's Judge Dredd | /r/Greentext

File: Dredd Apocalypse_War.jpg (33 KB, 271x368) Taika Waititi to helm new Dredd movie Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)17:34:36 No.212845191 >>212845725 >>212846082 >>212846100 >>212846223 >>212847626 >>212849196 >>212849312 Seriously? F------ SERIOUSLY???!!! https://www.theguardian.com/film/2025/jul/17/taika-waititi-judge-dredd-movie >> Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:05:52 No.212845725 >>212845191 (OP) I also have no talent. Why can't I direct movies? ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:11:50 No.212845832 File: I want a new Dredd film.jpg (27 KB, 512x384) >>212846625 Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:28:50 No.212846092 >>212846113 hopefully it's about Judge Death ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:30:14 No.212846113 ►>>212846294 >>212846092 >"Seriously, they named you Judge DEATH? SERIOUSLY?!" >"Admittedly it's a little on the nose" ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:41:24 No.212846294 ►>>212847628 >>212846113 he's honestly great satire on the extreme of authoritarianism. Like the billions must die meme ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)20:06:25 No.212847628 ►>>212850729 File: original.jpg (194 KB, 1403x700) MOGE GE DREDD BY JOHN WAGNER and RON SMITH CITIZEN WHELMA HARVEY? YOU SENT A CAKE TO YOUR HUSBAND IN ISO-CUBE 121 YESTERDAY? THIS WAS INSIDE. Y-YES... YOU'VE FOUND THE FILE! YES? OH, I DON'T CARE! LOCK ME AWAY! LIFE'S NOT WORTH LIVING WITHOUT MY ELBERT! REDD YOU BETTER GET USED TO IT. ELBERT'S DEAD. D-D-DEAD! HE ATE THE CAKE. 243 JUDGE DREDD STARS EVERY MONDAY IN THE GALAXY'S GREATEST COMIC 2000AD IPC Magazines Ltd, 1986 >>212846294 I think the problem is that he can't do jokes straight-faced. Everyone in his films knows it's a farce and acts as such, but the majority of the humour of Dredd works because Judge Dredd is a straight man who is completely serious all the time, no matter the silliness of the situation ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)22:10:42 No.212849370 >HANDS UP CREEPS >*scummers shoot back* >Drok damnit why can't they ever do this the easy way? >You're dead judge! >*dredd pops him in the head* >It's Dredd, actually! >*skyway collapses above and a fatty lands on the other scummer, bellywheel bouncing towards Dredd's feet* >Huh, the forecast didn't call for rain >*hauls fatty off the squished scummer* >Thanks for the save, citizen. But that's 10 years in the cubes for destruction of public infrastructure >Aww gee Judge can't ya let me off! I saved ya life! >How about I give you a ten second headstart to run away? >*gives camera a skeptical smirk as the fatty struggles to stay upright without his bellywheel* ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)22:17:58 No.212849462 ► So ready for more quipcore cgi slopwave to ping my dopamine receptors bros!!!
File: Dredd Apocalypse_War.jpg (33 KB, 271x368) Taika Waititi to helm new Dredd movie Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)17:34:36 No.212845191 >>212845725 >>212846082 >>212846100 >>212846223 >>212847626 >>212849196 >>212849312 Seriously? F------ SERIOUSLY???!!! https://www.theguardian.com/film/2025/jul/17/taika-waititi-judge-dredd-movie >> Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:05:52 No.212845725 >>212845191 (OP) I also have no talent. Why can't I direct movies? ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:11:50 No.212845832 File: I want a new Dredd film.jpg (27 KB, 512x384) >>212846625 Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:28:50 No.212846092 >>212846113 hopefully it's about Judge Death ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:30:14 No.212846113 ►>>212846294 >>212846092 >"Seriously, they named you Judge DEATH? SERIOUSLY?!" >"Admittedly it's a little on the nose" ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)18:41:24 No.212846294 ►>>212847628 >>212846113 he's honestly great satire on the extreme of authoritarianism. Like the billions must die meme ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)20:06:25 No.212847628 ►>>212850729 File: original.jpg (194 KB, 1403x700) MOGE GE DREDD BY JOHN WAGNER and RON SMITH CITIZEN WHELMA HARVEY? YOU SENT A CAKE TO YOUR HUSBAND IN ISO-CUBE 121 YESTERDAY? THIS WAS INSIDE. Y-YES... YOU'VE FOUND THE FILE! YES? OH, I DON'T CARE! LOCK ME AWAY! LIFE'S NOT WORTH LIVING WITHOUT MY ELBERT! REDD YOU BETTER GET USED TO IT. ELBERT'S DEAD. D-D-DEAD! HE ATE THE CAKE. 243 JUDGE DREDD STARS EVERY MONDAY IN THE GALAXY'S GREATEST COMIC 2000AD IPC Magazines Ltd, 1986 >>212846294 I think the problem is that he can't do jokes straight-faced. Everyone in his films knows it's a farce and acts as such, but the majority of the humour of Dredd works because Judge Dredd is a straight man who is completely serious all the time, no matter the silliness of the situation ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)22:10:42 No.212849370 >HANDS UP CREEPS >*scummers shoot back* >Drok damnit why can't they ever do this the easy way? >You're dead judge! >*dredd pops him in the head* >It's Dredd, actually! >*skyway collapses above and a fatty lands on the other scummer, bellywheel bouncing towards Dredd's feet* >Huh, the forecast didn't call for rain >*hauls fatty off the squished scummer* >Thanks for the save, citizen. But that's 10 years in the cubes for destruction of public infrastructure >Aww gee Judge can't ya let me off! I saved ya life! >How about I give you a ten second headstart to run away? >*gives camera a skeptical smirk as the fatty struggles to stay upright without his bellywheel* ☐ Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)22:17:58 No.212849462 ► So ready for more quipcore cgi slopwave to ping my dopamine receptors bros!!!

Greentext Stories

Anon orders Chinese food | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 这个悲伤的男人需要好猫 94 KB PNG be me 04/06/23(Thu)13:59:07 No.72846819 > were outside drinking with my friends > not really feeling the vibe tonight, without going into details I just had a s----- day > there is this Chinese restaurant I always order from > Im a regular there > I go in and order the same meal I have ordered for over a year > I always tip a few bucks extra since it looks like they need the extra bucks > as a result I get extra rice and fortune cookies > this time they noticed I was down > I hear the Chinese chef say something in Chinese > after a while i Get my meal but this time i also Get my money back > they say in a broken english > Today meal is free you happy man > makes me feel better > i will now always order from these people > made my night much better
Anonymous 这个悲伤的男人需要好猫 94 KB PNG be me 04/06/23(Thu)13:59:07 No.72846819 > were outside drinking with my friends > not really feeling the vibe tonight, without going into details I just had a s----- day > there is this Chinese restaurant I always order from > Im a regular there > I go in and order the same meal I have ordered for over a year > I always tip a few bucks extra since it looks like they need the extra bucks > as a result I get extra rice and fortune cookies > this time they noticed I was down > I hear the Chinese chef say something in Chinese > after a while i Get my meal but this time i also Get my money back > they say in a broken english > Today meal is free you happy man > makes me feel better > i will now always order from these people > made my night much better

Greentext Stories

Anon makes an oopsie | /r/Greentext

blackfacepepe.jpg (20 KB, 657x450) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)07:29:13 No.40749171 ▼ >>40749181 The only way to talk to God is to talk in the universal language. The one language that everyone on earth can 1 speak and understand. Music. God really does answer prayers, but only if the prayer is the right song. And no one has ever figured out the notes. Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)07:32:22 No.40749181 >>40749171 (OP) whoops wrong pic
blackfacepepe.jpg (20 KB, 657x450) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)07:29:13 No.40749171 ▼ >>40749181 The only way to talk to God is to talk in the universal language. The one language that everyone on earth can 1 speak and understand. Music. God really does answer prayers, but only if the prayer is the right song. And no one has ever figured out the notes. Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)07:32:22 No.40749181 >>40749171 (OP) whoops wrong pic

Greentext Stories

Japan was ground zero for this | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 13 KB GIF 01/15/22(Sat) 15:19:16 No.870735033 >Australia had a rabbit plague in the mid 1800s >They tried a variety of methods to get rid of them >Eventually they got desperate, and switched to the unconventional >They made fake rabbits that were more attractive than the real rabbits >The ones attracted to the fake rabbits didn't breed and the population was thus reduced >Tfw they're doing it with people now >Tfw I figured out why Anime girls exist The scary part is from what I've seen, it's working.
Anonymous 13 KB GIF 01/15/22(Sat) 15:19:16 No.870735033 >Australia had a rabbit plague in the mid 1800s >They tried a variety of methods to get rid of them >Eventually they got desperate, and switched to the unconventional >They made fake rabbits that were more attractive than the real rabbits >The ones attracted to the fake rabbits didn't breed and the population was thus reduced >Tfw they're doing it with people now >Tfw I figured out why Anime girls exist The scary part is from what I've seen, it's working.

Greentext Stories

Late night with Anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)02:27:44 No.212843860 Drumpf got the Stephen Colbert show finally cancelled The good guys lost tonight F to pay respects >>212843860 (OP) # You mean the good guys won Honestly just learned about this All these talkshow host look and sound the same. They even have the same names >Criticizes boss >Gets fired >Suprised pikachu face
: Anonymous 07/18/25(Fri)02:27:44 No.212843860 Drumpf got the Stephen Colbert show finally cancelled The good guys lost tonight F to pay respects >>212843860 (OP) # You mean the good guys won Honestly just learned about this All these talkshow host look and sound the same. They even have the same names >Criticizes boss >Gets fired >Suprised pikachu face

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