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Anon ponders about women | /r/Greentext

An Are women just biologically gross? Are women just biologically gr(...) 56 KB PNG 04/14/25(Mon)19:32:47 No.80984936 My older brother and his friends used to beat the s--- out of me when I was like 8- 12, he had this one friend who was massively fat, I'm talking 5'7 and 450+ pounds. They would do this thing where they'd make the fat friend run on our treadmill till he was drenched in sweat, my brother and his other friends would then grab me, pin me down and the fat guy would sit on my face completely drenched in sweat. Every vagina I have ever smelled has smelled worse than that fat sweaty guy did sitting on my face.
An Are women just biologically gross? Are women just biologically gr(...) 56 KB PNG 04/14/25(Mon)19:32:47 No.80984936 My older brother and his friends used to beat the s--- out of me when I was like 8- 12, he had this one friend who was massively fat, I'm talking 5'7 and 450+ pounds. They would do this thing where they'd make the fat friend run on our treadmill till he was drenched in sweat, my brother and his other friends would then grab me, pin me down and the fat guy would sit on my face completely drenched in sweat. Every vagina I have ever smelled has smelled worse than that fat sweaty guy did sitting on my face.

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Gondor Calls For Aid | /r/Greentext

Inhalants by Sophie Nebbleville - Thu, 14 May 2015 23:26:08 EST ID:w2fi0ARW No. 122442 A Report Quick Reply Expand 1431660368674.jpg (194930 B, 510x764) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Hide Th So I've been huffing a lot of stuff recently. I know it's super bad for me, but the high is incredible and I can't really get other drugs. My big issue is that people can pretty much immediately tell if I've been huffing. I either smell like gasoline or lighter fluid or I have paint all over my face, or I can't hear s--- because I've been huffing air horn gas. Anyone have a good discreet inhalant I can just buy nonchalantly at a store? pic unrelated 122443>> 122451>> 123092>> 123227>> Phoebe Buzzshit - Fri, 15 May 2015 16:50:21 >>122442 (OP) I cant hear s--- because I've been huffing air hom gas WIK BLAST AIR HORN WIKGOAL >>huffing air horn gas Seriously? I mean, like, you literally blow the horn and breathe the gas that comes out of the end? That, and it's associated image, has given me the best laugh I've had from here in ages... Btw, how do you not get caught? What do people say if you do? I mean, long sustained blasts of an airhorn are, by their very nature, designed to attract people's attention... F------ can't stop lol'ing at this, s---... 122452>> 122463>> 122472>> Beatrice Blammerstone - Sun, 17 May 2015 09:15:07 EST ID:CpZX7cmN No. 1224720 >>122451 Yeah I honestly can't believe this, it just sounds so.. Impractical? A Quick Reply I imagine him like getting dumped or something, then going back to his house to get high, and his friends in the neighborhood hearing the horns and going like "Sounds like Anon is sad again." Like offbeat bagpipes 122473>> 122492>> Betsy Dinderfoot - Thu, 18 Jun 2015 16:51:16 EST ID:BNIEZv3c No. 123092 A Quick Reply >>122442 (OP) good f------ god, OP. I have been laughing about this thread for like 20 minutes now. thank you, I really needed this today. Jack Povingwirk - Sun, 28 Jun 2015 03:55:52 EST ID:JINrr0a6 No. 123236 A Quick Reply BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP >F--- dude, this is f------ intense bro >Yo pass that s--- BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP >Aw f--- yeah... Oh Jesus Christ >What man? >My mom's calling me /other/, a magic place
Inhalants by Sophie Nebbleville - Thu, 14 May 2015 23:26:08 EST ID:w2fi0ARW No. 122442 A Report Quick Reply Expand 1431660368674.jpg (194930 B, 510x764) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Hide Th So I've been huffing a lot of stuff recently. I know it's super bad for me, but the high is incredible and I can't really get other drugs. My big issue is that people can pretty much immediately tell if I've been huffing. I either smell like gasoline or lighter fluid or I have paint all over my face, or I can't hear s--- because I've been huffing air horn gas. Anyone have a good discreet inhalant I can just buy nonchalantly at a store? pic unrelated 122443>> 122451>> 123092>> 123227>> Phoebe Buzzshit - Fri, 15 May 2015 16:50:21 >>122442 (OP) I cant hear s--- because I've been huffing air hom gas WIK BLAST AIR HORN WIKGOAL >>huffing air horn gas Seriously? I mean, like, you literally blow the horn and breathe the gas that comes out of the end? That, and it's associated image, has given me the best laugh I've had from here in ages... Btw, how do you not get caught? What do people say if you do? I mean, long sustained blasts of an airhorn are, by their very nature, designed to attract people's attention... F------ can't stop lol'ing at this, s---... 122452>> 122463>> 122472>> Beatrice Blammerstone - Sun, 17 May 2015 09:15:07 EST ID:CpZX7cmN No. 1224720 >>122451 Yeah I honestly can't believe this, it just sounds so.. Impractical? A Quick Reply I imagine him like getting dumped or something, then going back to his house to get high, and his friends in the neighborhood hearing the horns and going like "Sounds like Anon is sad again." Like offbeat bagpipes 122473>> 122492>> Betsy Dinderfoot - Thu, 18 Jun 2015 16:51:16 EST ID:BNIEZv3c No. 123092 A Quick Reply >>122442 (OP) good f------ god, OP. I have been laughing about this thread for like 20 minutes now. thank you, I really needed this today. Jack Povingwirk - Sun, 28 Jun 2015 03:55:52 EST ID:JINrr0a6 No. 123236 A Quick Reply BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP >F--- dude, this is f------ intense bro >Yo pass that s--- BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP >Aw f--- yeah... Oh Jesus Christ >What man? >My mom's calling me /other/, a magic place

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Anon explains self respect | /r/Greentext

File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie
File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

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"If it works, it's not stupid" | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: JZhKdmQD) 01/22/13(Tue)15:51:04 No.452958905 Replies: >>452960968 >>452962 >be 17 >at party >super drunk >girl that I know likes me is there >we start dancing and grinding >she asks me to come upstairs >not thinking, surewhynot >get in a room >she pulls down my pants >forgot I still had my boner hiding apparatus on from school >she sees it >runs downstairs >tells everyone at school f--- my life Anonymous (ID: c8HyS7Tp) 01/22/13(Tue)16:01:35 No.452960968 Replies: >>452962246 >>452958905 A.... what? Explain. Anonymous (ID: JZhKdmQD) 01/22/13(Tue)16:07:59 No.452962246 Replies: >>452962647 >>45296299 >>452971242 >>452971640 >>452971829 >>452972351 >>452972537 >>452972845 >>452972869 >>452973742 >>45297; >>452960968 A tampon put into my anus with the string tied around my penis, it keeps it from sticking up.
Anonymous (ID: JZhKdmQD) 01/22/13(Tue)15:51:04 No.452958905 Replies: >>452960968 >>452962 >be 17 >at party >super drunk >girl that I know likes me is there >we start dancing and grinding >she asks me to come upstairs >not thinking, surewhynot >get in a room >she pulls down my pants >forgot I still had my boner hiding apparatus on from school >she sees it >runs downstairs >tells everyone at school f--- my life Anonymous (ID: c8HyS7Tp) 01/22/13(Tue)16:01:35 No.452960968 Replies: >>452962246 >>452958905 A.... what? Explain. Anonymous (ID: JZhKdmQD) 01/22/13(Tue)16:07:59 No.452962246 Replies: >>452962647 >>45296299 >>452971242 >>452971640 >>452971829 >>452972351 >>452972537 >>452972845 >>452972869 >>452973742 >>45297; >>452960968 A tampon put into my anus with the string tied around my penis, it keeps it from sticking up.

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The Winter Soldier | /r/Greentext

SWEET JESUS >Check Papa Box >F------ Luger tucked next to an SS cap >Luger is loaded First Time Squeezing the Trigger? Anonymous 12/09/14(Tue)1 >Winter 2011 >Grandpa had passed 4 months ago >Left me his WW2 stuff in a rusty box >Sleeping soundly >Hear a crash downstairs >Someone had broken in my window >Have no firearms >F--- f-- >Slap hat on and run downstairs stark nekkid > Spot the f----- going through my entertainment center >Aim and scream first German words that pop into my head "PANZERKAMPFWAGEN SCHADENFREUDE" >Fire exe until out of rounds >He bolted for the window, literally screaming and crying something about Nazi's supposed to be extinct. >Definitely hit him a few times since there was blood on the carpet. >Call cops, guy gets arrested, asked about Nazi stuff, tell story, cops love it. >Nekkid Nazi becomes neighborhood story. And that was how my dead Nazi Grandpa encouraged me to fire a gun for the first time and save my playstation.
SWEET JESUS >Check Papa Box >F------ Luger tucked next to an SS cap >Luger is loaded First Time Squeezing the Trigger? Anonymous 12/09/14(Tue)1 >Winter 2011 >Grandpa had passed 4 months ago >Left me his WW2 stuff in a rusty box >Sleeping soundly >Hear a crash downstairs >Someone had broken in my window >Have no firearms >F--- f-- >Slap hat on and run downstairs stark nekkid > Spot the f----- going through my entertainment center >Aim and scream first German words that pop into my head "PANZERKAMPFWAGEN SCHADENFREUDE" >Fire exe until out of rounds >He bolted for the window, literally screaming and crying something about Nazi's supposed to be extinct. >Definitely hit him a few times since there was blood on the carpet. >Call cops, guy gets arrested, asked about Nazi stuff, tell story, cops love it. >Nekkid Nazi becomes neighborhood story. And that was how my dead Nazi Grandpa encouraged me to fire a gun for the first time and save my playstation.

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Eternal revolution! | /r/Greentext

25 KB JPEG > American leftist party > look inside Trotskyism EVERY F------ TIME
25 KB JPEG > American leftist party > look inside Trotskyism EVERY F------ TIME

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Might as well upload the last greentext I saved. | /r/Greentext

>be me >using my pc >feel the need to pee >go pee >theseus gnomes sprint into my room at lightspeed and replace every part of my pc, keyboard, monitor with identical parts >come back >it's not my pc anymore i cant prove it but i know theyre f------ doing it. how do i stop them? what do you guys do?
>be me >using my pc >feel the need to pee >go pee >theseus gnomes sprint into my room at lightspeed and replace every part of my pc, keyboard, monitor with identical parts >come back >it's not my pc anymore i cant prove it but i know theyre f------ doing it. how do i stop them? what do you guys do?

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A Tale As Old As Time | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/16/11(Fri)12:31 No.29717036 File1316190712.jpg-(16 KB, 289x295, YES.jpg) invited to the wedding >aunt asks who's getting married >fluttershy and appljack >aunt says "They can't get married" >cousin is distraught "why not!?" > aunt says "because girls can't marry other girls" >cousin is angry "who says?" >aunt "god says" >cousin "then I'm going to worship satan" f------ awesome, lemme tell you speaking of Gay Marriage I have a story for you all >be with family last weekend > little 5 year old cousin playing with MLP toys in the living room >announces we are all
Anonymous 09/16/11(Fri)12:31 No.29717036 File1316190712.jpg-(16 KB, 289x295, YES.jpg) invited to the wedding >aunt asks who's getting married >fluttershy and appljack >aunt says "They can't get married" >cousin is distraught "why not!?" > aunt says "because girls can't marry other girls" >cousin is angry "who says?" >aunt "god says" >cousin "then I'm going to worship satan" f------ awesome, lemme tell you speaking of Gay Marriage I have a story for you all >be with family last weekend > little 5 year old cousin playing with MLP toys in the living room >announces we are all

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To Be Highly Regarded | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)15:52:48 No.68301213 >buying a new rug >cashier says "you must have a long hallway" >think that was a sexual innuendo >"only 5 inches actually" why am I so f------ stupid 384 KB PNG
Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)15:52:48 No.68301213 >buying a new rug >cashier says "you must have a long hallway" >think that was a sexual innuendo >"only 5 inches actually" why am I so f------ stupid 384 KB PNG

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Anon ponders. | /r/Greentext

1642137052504.jpg 229 KB JPG >there was a super attractive girl in your class >was the most popular girl at school and probably the most attractive girl you've ever seen >you come back from summer and she's not there, doesn't appear the entire school year >another year later, your teacher tells you that she's "learning from home until her health recovers" >asks you to deliver her papers and help her out with anything >you get to her house >this is what she used to look like and what she looks like now >she asks if you would like to come inside for a bit and talk for a bit, since she hasn't seen anyone in ages How do you respond? 14 Replies / 5 Images : Anonymous 65 KB PNG View Thread 07/16/22(Sat) 08:02:54 No.69433442 >Ah, another lardophile to hunt down. >See you in gas chamber, degen! >You will know when see me. >I'll be one in fancy uniform, laughing while-GURK!
1642137052504.jpg 229 KB JPG >there was a super attractive girl in your class >was the most popular girl at school and probably the most attractive girl you've ever seen >you come back from summer and she's not there, doesn't appear the entire school year >another year later, your teacher tells you that she's "learning from home until her health recovers" >asks you to deliver her papers and help her out with anything >you get to her house >this is what she used to look like and what she looks like now >she asks if you would like to come inside for a bit and talk for a bit, since she hasn't seen anyone in ages How do you respond? 14 Replies / 5 Images : Anonymous 65 KB PNG View Thread 07/16/22(Sat) 08:02:54 No.69433442 >Ah, another lardophile to hunt down. >See you in gas chamber, degen! >You will know when see me. >I'll be one in fancy uniform, laughing while-GURK!

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Yes it's that easy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/11/25(Fri)17:45:19 No.708007254 141 KB JPG >add hot white woman to game >concurrent players increase by over 100,000 Is it really that easy?
Anonymous 04/11/25(Fri)17:45:19 No.708007254 141 KB JPG >add hot white woman to game >concurrent players increase by over 100,000 Is it really that easy?

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Bird meets Chick | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/28/17(Fri)10:56:37 No.36618253 file.png 1.77 MB PNG >japanese zoo puts cute anime versions of animals in the habitats >one penguin becomes so obsessed with the anime girl that he stops eating because he doesn't want to leave her 59 Replies/20 Images View Thread
Anonymous 04/28/17(Fri)10:56:37 No.36618253 file.png 1.77 MB PNG >japanese zoo puts cute anime versions of animals in the habitats >one penguin becomes so obsessed with the anime girl that he stops eating because he doesn't want to leave her 59 Replies/20 Images View Thread

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Those Who Can't, Teach | /r/Greentext

File: iceberg.jpg (35 KB, 804x526) Anonymous 05/31/18(Thu)09:53:16 No.770192823 >be me, a dad >showing my 7 year old son compilation of bizarre danny devito scenes from always sunny >get to the one with frank in a hospital gown >frank spins around and you see his gross ass and he says, "really lets your ass breathe" >son says, "your butt can breathe?" >i say, "Oh ya. It is difficult but you can breathe out of your butt." >my wife glares at me but laughs >son laughs but asks if I'm being serious, i say yes while cracking up >fast forward to later and i'm brushing my teeth in the bathroom >look over at bath tub and see son's ass in the air, but his head is under water >kid is drowning himself while trying to breathe out of his a------
File: iceberg.jpg (35 KB, 804x526) Anonymous 05/31/18(Thu)09:53:16 No.770192823 >be me, a dad >showing my 7 year old son compilation of bizarre danny devito scenes from always sunny >get to the one with frank in a hospital gown >frank spins around and you see his gross ass and he says, "really lets your ass breathe" >son says, "your butt can breathe?" >i say, "Oh ya. It is difficult but you can breathe out of your butt." >my wife glares at me but laughs >son laughs but asks if I'm being serious, i say yes while cracking up >fast forward to later and i'm brushing my teeth in the bathroom >look over at bath tub and see son's ass in the air, but his head is under water >kid is drowning himself while trying to breathe out of his a------

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Ear Disabled | /r/Greentext

File: 1342889711888.jpg (41 KB, 447x425) F--- Anonymous (ID: b2GUC90E) 05/17/14(Sat) 13:24:46 No. 546835062 >>546835350 >>546835545 >>546835658 >>546835802 >>546835957 >>546835989 >>546836321 >>546836827 >>546837392 >>546838392 ITT Deaf people problems >I learned farting makes a sound at 20 Was with gf (not my first one) >At dinner in a very nice place >Waiter asking me for my order and my a------ needs to flex >Waiter gives look of disgust and terror Itwaswet.PNG >Gf signs me asking if I s--- myself >I have no clue what's going on >my girlfriend had to explain to me with the waiter right there that I just farted and that they make noise and that this particular one made everyone in the room stop talking >Mfw ive farted in front of everyone I know and nobody has ever said anything to me I excused myself to the bathroom and never talked to her again Anonymous (ID: JW6J5EFe) 05/17/14(Sat) 13:27:24 No.546835350 File: 1374525874783.jpg (47 KB, 321x374) >>546835062 (OP) this has got to be the greatest thing i ever read Anonymous (ID: qq9pYIE8) 05/17/14(Sat) 13:28:33 No.546835464 >>546836217 >>5468363 File: I stole this laptop.jpg (85 KB, 425x282)
File: 1342889711888.jpg (41 KB, 447x425) F--- Anonymous (ID: b2GUC90E) 05/17/14(Sat) 13:24:46 No. 546835062 >>546835350 >>546835545 >>546835658 >>546835802 >>546835957 >>546835989 >>546836321 >>546836827 >>546837392 >>546838392 ITT Deaf people problems >I learned farting makes a sound at 20 Was with gf (not my first one) >At dinner in a very nice place >Waiter asking me for my order and my a------ needs to flex >Waiter gives look of disgust and terror Itwaswet.PNG >Gf signs me asking if I s--- myself >I have no clue what's going on >my girlfriend had to explain to me with the waiter right there that I just farted and that they make noise and that this particular one made everyone in the room stop talking >Mfw ive farted in front of everyone I know and nobody has ever said anything to me I excused myself to the bathroom and never talked to her again Anonymous (ID: JW6J5EFe) 05/17/14(Sat) 13:27:24 No.546835350 File: 1374525874783.jpg (47 KB, 321x374) >>546835062 (OP) this has got to be the greatest thing i ever read Anonymous (ID: qq9pYIE8) 05/17/14(Sat) 13:28:33 No.546835464 >>546836217 >>5468363 File: I stole this laptop.jpg (85 KB, 425x282)

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Small Justice | /r/Greentext

.png (59 KB, 658x662) No.43232832 Anonymous 19 min. ago >send d--- pic to qt3.14 >she calls me a sicko and blocks me >oh well i'm used to it >next day cops at my door >she reported me to the police for distributing CP >they show me the pic i sent her >i tell them it's my c--- >they don't believe me >i have to pull down my pants >they give each other a sad look and apologize for bothering me
.png (59 KB, 658x662) No.43232832 Anonymous 19 min. ago >send d--- pic to qt3.14 >she calls me a sicko and blocks me >oh well i'm used to it >next day cops at my door >she reported me to the police for distributing CP >they show me the pic i sent her >i tell them it's my c--- >they don't believe me >i have to pull down my pants >they give each other a sad look and apologize for bothering me

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Right in the feels | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 815056689 124.0 kB PNG 1시간 전 ... Hey /b/ I need to tell you guys a story >Be me >Be working at suicide hotline >Have access to donation logs >Go through them from time to time between calls >Notice a man has made a donation of $17.50 every month, same day, for a couple years >Check to see if there's a note with the donations >They all read something like as follows "To Jason, from dad. I miss you every day" >I asked about it, turns out his son killed himself when he was really young >That money is his son's allowance Don't think that people won't miss you, or people will forget you, you are loved anon even if you don't feel it right now. 3 REPLIES 3 IMAGES REPLY
Anonymous | 815056689 124.0 kB PNG 1시간 전 ... Hey /b/ I need to tell you guys a story >Be me >Be working at suicide hotline >Have access to donation logs >Go through them from time to time between calls >Notice a man has made a donation of $17.50 every month, same day, for a couple years >Check to see if there's a note with the donations >They all read something like as follows "To Jason, from dad. I miss you every day" >I asked about it, turns out his son killed himself when he was really young >That money is his son's allowance Don't think that people won't miss you, or people will forget you, you are loved anon even if you don't feel it right now. 3 REPLIES 3 IMAGES REPLY

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