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Greentext Stories - Images (46,548 results)

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Life of the party | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 216 KB JPG 08/13/20(Thu)16:15:00 No.59554950 >sitting alone in room playing vidya >get text from old friend who ghosted me once he went full chadmode >havent talked to him in years >"bro come out tonight (address and time)" >the time is literally 20 minutes away >typical chad >decide f--- it i havent hungout with people in forever ill regret it if i dont go >shower and get dressed >pickup some beers on the way there just as a friendly gesture to chad >pullup to a house that has cars loaded on the road and on the front yard >music blaring >walk up to the front door and enter because its wide open >walk around and see nobody i know >finally find chad hanging with his new group of friends >walk up to him and say hello and hold up the beers and say look what i got >he says hey and says he didnt know i was friends with (owner of the house) >say im not >he asks who invited me >i say he texted me >he makes a sudden realization face and then says "ooooooh i meant to text another (my name) sorry man, damn that means i didnt invite him, let me call him right now" and walks off while making a call >put the beers down on the counter and go back to my car and go back home
Anonymous 216 KB JPG 08/13/20(Thu)16:15:00 No.59554950 >sitting alone in room playing vidya >get text from old friend who ghosted me once he went full chadmode >havent talked to him in years >"bro come out tonight (address and time)" >the time is literally 20 minutes away >typical chad >decide f--- it i havent hungout with people in forever ill regret it if i dont go >shower and get dressed >pickup some beers on the way there just as a friendly gesture to chad >pullup to a house that has cars loaded on the road and on the front yard >music blaring >walk up to the front door and enter because its wide open >walk around and see nobody i know >finally find chad hanging with his new group of friends >walk up to him and say hello and hold up the beers and say look what i got >he says hey and says he didnt know i was friends with (owner of the house) >say im not >he asks who invited me >i say he texted me >he makes a sudden realization face and then says "ooooooh i meant to text another (my name) sorry man, damn that means i didnt invite him, let me call him right now" and walks off while making a call >put the beers down on the counter and go back to my car and go back home

Greentext Stories

Roadkill king | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 3.29 MB PNG I'd ever have 06/22/25(Sun)12:04:24 No.149108237 >be me >pop Over the Hedge into the family DVD player >expect cute animal antics >Heather the possum girl hits the screen >my tiny monkey brain combusts >goth, dramatic, fakes her own death >the blueprint for every unstable crush >start lying motionless in neighbor's yard for hours >pretend to be dead so Heather will come revive me with possum kisses >neighbor calls animal control >animal control guy pokes me with a broom >I moan "Heather..." >fast forward >older now, but no wiser >every goth girl I date must squeak and pretend to expire mid-makeout >if she doesn't, she's gone >make girlfriend wear fuzzy ears, hiss at me, crawl in trash bags >neighbors complain about "animal noises" from my bedroom >one night, blackout drunk behind Wendy's dumpster >see actual possum rooting through fries >whimper "Heather..." and reach out >it hisses, I hiss back >moment of pure, primal connection >next morning: wake up half-naked in alley, fur in my teeth >don't care, would do it again >current gf calls me her "roadkill king" >we roleplay car accident foreplay >I moan her possum name when I finish >one day death will claim me for real >pray my rotting corpse finds her on the other side of the hedge >never coming back
Anonymous 3.29 MB PNG I'd ever have 06/22/25(Sun)12:04:24 No.149108237 >be me >pop Over the Hedge into the family DVD player >expect cute animal antics >Heather the possum girl hits the screen >my tiny monkey brain combusts >goth, dramatic, fakes her own death >the blueprint for every unstable crush >start lying motionless in neighbor's yard for hours >pretend to be dead so Heather will come revive me with possum kisses >neighbor calls animal control >animal control guy pokes me with a broom >I moan "Heather..." >fast forward >older now, but no wiser >every goth girl I date must squeak and pretend to expire mid-makeout >if she doesn't, she's gone >make girlfriend wear fuzzy ears, hiss at me, crawl in trash bags >neighbors complain about "animal noises" from my bedroom >one night, blackout drunk behind Wendy's dumpster >see actual possum rooting through fries >whimper "Heather..." and reach out >it hisses, I hiss back >moment of pure, primal connection >next morning: wake up half-naked in alley, fur in my teeth >don't care, would do it again >current gf calls me her "roadkill king" >we roleplay car accident foreplay >I moan her possum name when I finish >one day death will claim me for real >pray my rotting corpse finds her on the other side of the hedge >never coming back

Greentext Stories

anon is stuck in a never ending cycle | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Settings Mobile Home 08/13/24(Tue)16:50:40 No.78481928 You Tube 39 KB PNG >Really like a YT video >Want to save it to make a YTP >Copy the URL >Type in "YouTube to MP4" >Click on the first result >"This website wants to know your location" >Click Deny >Click where you're supposed to paste in the link >P--- popup >Click deny >Close popup >Paste in link >Click Convert >P--- popup >Close popup >"Converting" < > >Go back to google >Click on the second result >Rinse and repeat I know one of them will work. MP4
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Settings Mobile Home 08/13/24(Tue)16:50:40 No.78481928 You Tube 39 KB PNG >Really like a YT video >Want to save it to make a YTP >Copy the URL >Type in "YouTube to MP4" >Click on the first result >"This website wants to know your location" >Click Deny >Click where you're supposed to paste in the link >P--- popup >Click deny >Close popup >Paste in link >Click Convert >P--- popup >Close popup >"Converting" < > >Go back to google >Click on the second result >Rinse and repeat I know one of them will work. MP4

Greentext Stories

Anon is in trouble | /r/Greentext

Lenticular UFO_cloud.jpg (111 KB, 900x675) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)06:28:59 No.40579790 >>40579853 Statistically speaking, someone is currently getting abducted and a--- probed by aliens right now. 1 Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)07:00:17 No.40579853 >>40579858 ayylmao.jpg (122 KB, 500x800) google yandex iqdb wait >>40579790 (OP) >BE ME >LITERALLY RIGHT NOW >GETTING ANALLY PROBED >OHSWEETJESUSNO.MP3 >LUCKILY THEY DIDN'T TAKE MY PHONE >POST THIS ON/X/ SO SOMEONE WILL COME SAVE ME >MFW YOU F------ THINK THIS IS A JOKE
Lenticular UFO_cloud.jpg (111 KB, 900x675) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)06:28:59 No.40579790 >>40579853 Statistically speaking, someone is currently getting abducted and a--- probed by aliens right now. 1 Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)07:00:17 No.40579853 >>40579858 ayylmao.jpg (122 KB, 500x800) google yandex iqdb wait >>40579790 (OP) >BE ME >LITERALLY RIGHT NOW >GETTING ANALLY PROBED >OHSWEETJESUSNO.MP3 >LUCKILY THEY DIDN'T TAKE MY PHONE >POST THIS ON/X/ SO SOMEONE WILL COME SAVE ME >MFW YOU F------ THINK THIS IS A JOKE

Greentext Stories

Funny Money | /r/Greentext

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect : Anonymous (ID: 1ullnKLH) + ▼ Settings Mobile Home 06/22/25(Sun)12:04:01 No.508316720 Why the F--- does some dirty arabs fighting in the dessert make my BTC/ETH go down, what the F--- 58 KB PNG Anonymous (ID: CWBSKbEf 06/22/25(Sun)12:06:08 No.508316859 Domino effect, fren. When the war knocks on you door you gotta turn your fake money into real money.
Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect : Anonymous (ID: 1ullnKLH) + ▼ Settings Mobile Home 06/22/25(Sun)12:04:01 No.508316720 Why the F--- does some dirty arabs fighting in the dessert make my BTC/ETH go down, what the F--- 58 KB PNG Anonymous (ID: CWBSKbEf 06/22/25(Sun)12:06:08 No.508316859 Domino effect, fren. When the war knocks on you door you gotta turn your fake money into real money.

Greentext Stories

Seinfeld could get pretty dark at times... | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_5219.jpg (130 KB, 1024x1024) >>211819768 >> Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:00:22 No.211818521 File: 1696782503855.jpg (181 KB, 1024x1024) >>211818602 ☐ Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)13:08:31 No.211814164 ►>>211814781 >>211816192 >>211816466 >>211818374 >>211819096 >>211822092 >>211822391 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ☐ Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)13:30:51 No.211814781 File: 1704634396460801.jpg (214 KB, 640x480) EXECUTIVE PRODUCER LARRY DAVID >>211814164 (OP). >This is Nutty Putty Cave, Jerry! I'm going to turn my life around by becoming a cave explorer. Women love an adventurous man. >George, you have no experience in exploring caves... You could get trapped down there. >Just watch me lower myself down, Jerry. I read a book about spelunking last night and I have all the equipment. It's foolproof. >George, this all seems kinda cr- >JEEEEEERRRRRY! >> ☐ Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:06:39 No.211818678 ►>>211820524 File: OIG2.jpg (134 KB, 1024x1024) It was oddly good at making Seinfeld. >> Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:03:42 No.211818602 File: 1741704443627631.jpg (106 KB, 1024x1024) >What is the deal with my oppressions? Are they really no worse than the others? >> Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:13:30 No.211818855 File: dredd seinfeld.jpg (208 KB, 1024x1024) >>211818521 Something about that show just works. >YOU'RE FINALLY GOING TO THE ISOCUBES FOR DATING THAT UNDERAGED GIRL, CREEP
File: IMG_5219.jpg (130 KB, 1024x1024) >>211819768 >> Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:00:22 No.211818521 File: 1696782503855.jpg (181 KB, 1024x1024) >>211818602 ☐ Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)13:08:31 No.211814164 ►>>211814781 >>211816192 >>211816466 >>211818374 >>211819096 >>211822092 >>211822391 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ☐ Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)13:30:51 No.211814781 File: 1704634396460801.jpg (214 KB, 640x480) EXECUTIVE PRODUCER LARRY DAVID >>211814164 (OP). >This is Nutty Putty Cave, Jerry! I'm going to turn my life around by becoming a cave explorer. Women love an adventurous man. >George, you have no experience in exploring caves... You could get trapped down there. >Just watch me lower myself down, Jerry. I read a book about spelunking last night and I have all the equipment. It's foolproof. >George, this all seems kinda cr- >JEEEEEERRRRRY! >> ☐ Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:06:39 No.211818678 ►>>211820524 File: OIG2.jpg (134 KB, 1024x1024) It was oddly good at making Seinfeld. >> Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:03:42 No.211818602 File: 1741704443627631.jpg (106 KB, 1024x1024) >What is the deal with my oppressions? Are they really no worse than the others? >> Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)16:13:30 No.211818855 File: dredd seinfeld.jpg (208 KB, 1024x1024) >>211818521 Something about that show just works. >YOU'RE FINALLY GOING TO THE ISOCUBES FOR DATING THAT UNDERAGED GIRL, CREEP

Greentext Stories

Femanon addresses the zoo. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Why can't you act normal towar(...) 53 41 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)00:02:40 No.8157295 >Post anything that indicates I am female on this website >"No, you are a t-----" >"There are no girls on the internet" >"This is bait, don't respond" >"You want attention" >"AAA SEND BOBS AND VAGENE" >"(Contactfagging)" >"(Complains about stuff women did that had nothing to do with me)" What will it take for you to just act normal? 49% of the world population is female. 4chan is not obscure. It is really not that crazy for women to post there. I would guess about 20- 30% of posters are female. 10 Replies / 2 Images Anonymous >>81572951 (OP) # View Thread 06/22/25(Sun)01:47:51 No.8157346 you are here to look at all the creeps, incels and losers like a zoo and sometimes throw them a bone don't be surprised when the lions you're seeing try to eat you
Anonymous Why can't you act normal towar(...) 53 41 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)00:02:40 No.8157295 >Post anything that indicates I am female on this website >"No, you are a t-----" >"There are no girls on the internet" >"This is bait, don't respond" >"You want attention" >"AAA SEND BOBS AND VAGENE" >"(Contactfagging)" >"(Complains about stuff women did that had nothing to do with me)" What will it take for you to just act normal? 49% of the world population is female. 4chan is not obscure. It is really not that crazy for women to post there. I would guess about 20- 30% of posters are female. 10 Replies / 2 Images Anonymous >>81572951 (OP) # View Thread 06/22/25(Sun)01:47:51 No.8157346 you are here to look at all the creeps, incels and losers like a zoo and sometimes throw them a bone don't be surprised when the lions you're seeing try to eat you

Greentext Stories

Anon on interests becoming mainstream. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 23 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)03:33:53 No.81573081 >like thing for years >suddenly becomes popular outta nowhere for some reason >ability to talk about thing becomes diminished as now hordes of retards are flooding the things audience >get bullied randomly for talking about thing because i become associated with the tard horde >popular interest in thing inevitably dies >try to talk about thing again >"blud thinks it's [year(s) when thing was popular]" this happen to you too? if so then name your thing
Anonymous 23 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)03:33:53 No.81573081 >like thing for years >suddenly becomes popular outta nowhere for some reason >ability to talk about thing becomes diminished as now hordes of retards are flooding the things audience >get bullied randomly for talking about thing because i become associated with the tard horde >popular interest in thing inevitably dies >try to talk about thing again >"blud thinks it's [year(s) when thing was popular]" this happen to you too? if so then name your thing

Greentext Stories

Anon hates corporations | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Corpora-cucks can't stop losin(...) Orban's Hungary Is Now Officially The Poorest Nation In The EU 106 KB PNG 06/21/25(Sat) 16:51:07 No.936085153 >Hungary does austerity under Orban and loses >The UK does austerity under Truss and loses >Russia does austerity under Putin and loses >Mexico does left-wing economics under Cárdenas and wins >Sweden does left-wing economics under Erlander and Palme and wins (then immediately loses due to austerity under Fälldin) >Jamaica does left-wing economics under Halness and wins When will you m------------ corporate glazers realize that left-wing economics such as nationalization and land- reform make the entire country richer, even benefiting the rich
Anonymous Corpora-cucks can't stop losin(...) Orban's Hungary Is Now Officially The Poorest Nation In The EU 106 KB PNG 06/21/25(Sat) 16:51:07 No.936085153 >Hungary does austerity under Orban and loses >The UK does austerity under Truss and loses >Russia does austerity under Putin and loses >Mexico does left-wing economics under Cárdenas and wins >Sweden does left-wing economics under Erlander and Palme and wins (then immediately loses due to austerity under Fälldin) >Jamaica does left-wing economics under Halness and wins When will you m------------ corporate glazers realize that left-wing economics such as nationalization and land- reform make the entire country richer, even benefiting the rich

Greentext Stories

Please do gay and real analysis of Chilean Anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Q/vr9Abj) 112 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)01:22:03 No.22850919 >Be me, just studying >There are two girls nearby who are also trying to study, but they simply can't concentrate >They talk a lot of crap and I can't help it but listen because I don't like to listen music while studying >Suddenly, the prettiest girl approaches to the other one >She holds the head of her friend as she approaches >They apparently kiss >"Oh my lord girl, why did you...' >They kept clingy for a while >"Chu~...chu~" >Suddenly a friend of them is about to appear from behind a corner >They quickly took distance and kept acting like nothing happened >They stayed like that for a while, trying to retake their former mood and talking >They go >I saw all of this with just the corner of my eye M-----------, why my country is infested with lesbians? I'm not that surprised, because for the shittalk that they had I realized that they are just your average liberal women of the XXI century. Still, what a sight
Anonymous (ID: Q/vr9Abj) 112 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)01:22:03 No.22850919 >Be me, just studying >There are two girls nearby who are also trying to study, but they simply can't concentrate >They talk a lot of crap and I can't help it but listen because I don't like to listen music while studying >Suddenly, the prettiest girl approaches to the other one >She holds the head of her friend as she approaches >They apparently kiss >"Oh my lord girl, why did you...' >They kept clingy for a while >"Chu~...chu~" >Suddenly a friend of them is about to appear from behind a corner >They quickly took distance and kept acting like nothing happened >They stayed like that for a while, trying to retake their former mood and talking >They go >I saw all of this with just the corner of my eye M-----------, why my country is infested with lesbians? I'm not that surprised, because for the shittalk that they had I realized that they are just your average liberal women of the XXI century. Still, what a sight

Greentext Stories

Anon talks about Redditors | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: AUTW/2vH) 03/05/22(Sat)02:12:45 No.36527238E 620 KB JPG >Soldier posts on Facebook his exact location to his friends and fellow Redditors in private >Redditor posts the image on Reddit for updoots >Russian scrolling through the subreddit gets confirmation that Ukrainians are using schools as bases >Russians shell every abandoned school in the area, massacring everybody A Redditor singlehandedly got multiple safe zones exposed for upvotes
Anonymous (ID: AUTW/2vH) 03/05/22(Sat)02:12:45 No.36527238E 620 KB JPG >Soldier posts on Facebook his exact location to his friends and fellow Redditors in private >Redditor posts the image on Reddit for updoots >Russian scrolling through the subreddit gets confirmation that Ukrainians are using schools as bases >Russians shell every abandoned school in the area, massacring everybody A Redditor singlehandedly got multiple safe zones exposed for upvotes

Greentext Stories

Anon has grown up | /r/Greentext

. 2h (06/21/25 10:25) 81565767 - 8 Re - 0 Img PNG 1MB (892 x 827) 6849c44f20714.png 3 Replies que se foda. >get horny >dont think of p--- or sex >instead my brain thinks about having a loving family where my fake partner and i are taking care of our children >im making them breakfast and my wife calls me into the bathroom to help brush their teeth and we sing a teeth brushing song so they calm down >i look at my partner through the mirror and shes smiling with love at me this has been happening for 2 months now. even thinking about p--- makes me sick. what is this.
. 2h (06/21/25 10:25) 81565767 - 8 Re - 0 Img PNG 1MB (892 x 827) 6849c44f20714.png 3 Replies que se foda. >get horny >dont think of p--- or sex >instead my brain thinks about having a loving family where my fake partner and i are taking care of our children >im making them breakfast and my wife calls me into the bathroom to help brush their teeth and we sing a teeth brushing song so they calm down >i look at my partner through the mirror and shes smiling with love at me this has been happening for 2 months now. even thinking about p--- makes me sick. what is this.

Greentext Stories

Anon visits Taco Bell | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 31 KB JPG 06/21/25(Sat) 23:29:03 No.936070767 >Be me >Eat like s--- most of my life >Normal s---- >Decide to eat healthy for a change to be better >Cut out Soda and fast food >Normal S---- >Couple weeks later, going out with friends and we eat fast food >Decide to treat myself >Next day >Massive explosive diarrhea The f---?
Anonymous 31 KB JPG 06/21/25(Sat) 23:29:03 No.936070767 >Be me >Eat like s--- most of my life >Normal s---- >Decide to eat healthy for a change to be better >Cut out Soda and fast food >Normal S---- >Couple weeks later, going out with friends and we eat fast food >Decide to treat myself >Next day >Massive explosive diarrhea The f---?

Greentext Stories

Anon is born a boy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 605 KB PNG 06/21/25(Sat) 17:18:10 No.81565145 >born as a male >fat goes to my ass which make it bubbly >it also goes to my thigh, which makes it somewhat thick >despite working out and my weight is normal, it wont go away what the f---
Anonymous 605 KB PNG 06/21/25(Sat) 17:18:10 No.81565145 >born as a male >fat goes to my ass which make it bubbly >it also goes to my thigh, which makes it somewhat thick >despite working out and my weight is normal, it wont go away what the f---

Greentext Stories

Anon on the War on Terror | /r/Greentext

⠀ Anonymous (ID: ZLQluv4W 06/19/25(Thu)16:56:42 No.507986395 46 KB JPG open f------ secret >Saddam Hussein plans to sell oil to Europe in euros, not dollars >Guy in prison says "he's building f------ nukes" >America invades, kills f------ Saddam, wrecks Iraq >No f------ WMDs found >Israeli nuclear program is literally an >They're not in the f------ NPT >They have f------ 80+ warheads >America: "f------ best friends forever" >Billions in aid >No f------ inspections >No f------ consequences >World says nothing >This is fine.jpeg
⠀ Anonymous (ID: ZLQluv4W 06/19/25(Thu)16:56:42 No.507986395 46 KB JPG open f------ secret >Saddam Hussein plans to sell oil to Europe in euros, not dollars >Guy in prison says "he's building f------ nukes" >America invades, kills f------ Saddam, wrecks Iraq >No f------ WMDs found >Israeli nuclear program is literally an >They're not in the f------ NPT >They have f------ 80+ warheads >America: "f------ best friends forever" >Billions in aid >No f------ inspections >No f------ consequences >World says nothing >This is fine.jpeg

Greentext Stories

Collapse of Communism | /r/Greentext

Anonymous "I don't have enough money to pay 06/20/25(Fri)19:02:59 No. 17779798 my student loans or buy a house!" How do communists reconcile the Monthly Budget RENT $1.500 GROCERIES5500 TRANSPORT$250 Total $2750 Q CERTIFIED GOOD BOY 53 KB JPG trilemma of the collapse of the Soviet Union and the global dominance of capitalism and NATO? >Option 1: Capitalism defeated communism because liberal democracy and market economies were superior - implying that Marxist theory was flawed or outdated. >Option 2: The communist bloc could have defeated NATO and capitalism, but chose not to even as - workers' movements were suppressed, socialist states collapsed, and inequality soared globally. This implies communist leaders were negligent or lacked conviction. >Option 3: Capitalism triumphed and communism - collapsed because the latter was never truly viable ― suggesting that the core ideals of Marxism-Leninism are utopian and unworkable in practice.
Anonymous "I don't have enough money to pay 06/20/25(Fri)19:02:59 No. 17779798 my student loans or buy a house!" How do communists reconcile the Monthly Budget RENT $1.500 GROCERIES5500 TRANSPORT$250 Total $2750 Q CERTIFIED GOOD BOY 53 KB JPG trilemma of the collapse of the Soviet Union and the global dominance of capitalism and NATO? >Option 1: Capitalism defeated communism because liberal democracy and market economies were superior - implying that Marxist theory was flawed or outdated. >Option 2: The communist bloc could have defeated NATO and capitalism, but chose not to even as - workers' movements were suppressed, socialist states collapsed, and inequality soared globally. This implies communist leaders were negligent or lacked conviction. >Option 3: Capitalism triumphed and communism - collapsed because the latter was never truly viable ― suggesting that the core ideals of Marxism-Leninism are utopian and unworkable in practice.

Greentext Stories
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