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Greentext Stories - Images (46,559 results)

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Vice Widdler | /r/Greentext

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Anonymous (ID: zbyZ1q+7) * ▼ Settings Mobile Home 06/23/25(Mon) 11:05:40 No.508442364 ୧ S مع 11465476576548765.jpg 103 KB JPG >>508440924 (OP) # >widdle me dis, what has two wegs and is gonna get dwafted soon, das wright, U ANON, now say tank u!
Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Anonymous (ID: zbyZ1q+7) * ▼ Settings Mobile Home 06/23/25(Mon) 11:05:40 No.508442364 ୧ S مع 11465476576548765.jpg 103 KB JPG >>508440924 (OP) # >widdle me dis, what has two wegs and is gonna get dwafted soon, das wright, U ANON, now say tank u!

Greentext Stories

very nice people | /r/Greentext

@ YOT Anonymous 12/08/22(Thu)23:25:50 No.174790646 ► >>174790757 >Be Libyan freedom fighter >Bolt a machine gun to your Toyota and start fighting the government >Blond white guy with a surfboard asks for a ride to the beach What do you do? Anonymous 12/08/22(Thu)23:34:34 No.174790757 >>174790646 (OP) # Take him to the beach inshallah
@ YOT Anonymous 12/08/22(Thu)23:25:50 No.174790646 ► >>174790757 >Be Libyan freedom fighter >Bolt a machine gun to your Toyota and start fighting the government >Blond white guy with a surfboard asks for a ride to the beach What do you do? Anonymous 12/08/22(Thu)23:34:34 No.174790757 >>174790646 (OP) # Take him to the beach inshallah

Greentext Stories

Anon talks game design | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 23/6/2025, 11:52:45 AM No.88079625 20 KB JPEG You can judge the quality of a game based on the way it handles shotguns > Massive damage in close distances but bullets just don't exist after 2 meters? > Bad game > Doesn't even account for range just does the same damage at every distance (f--- you battlefield)? > Bad game > Treats it with actual spread mechanics and a realistic distance/damage ratio? > Good game
Anonymous 23/6/2025, 11:52:45 AM No.88079625 20 KB JPEG You can judge the quality of a game based on the way it handles shotguns > Massive damage in close distances but bullets just don't exist after 2 meters? > Bad game > Doesn't even account for range just does the same damage at every distance (f--- you battlefield)? > Bad game > Treats it with actual spread mechanics and a realistic distance/damage ratio? > Good game

Greentext Stories

Jerks all around... | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1.87 MB JPG 06/23/25(Mon)02:19:27 No.815844 >be me >hang out with same 4 friends since high school >one friend starts working at a new tech job, meets a guy named Wei Zhang >starts inviting him to game nights, says he's "chill" >Wei's quiet at first, but kinda intense when he talks >talks about self-control a lot >brings up dopamine, productivity, all that >says he hasn't jerked off in 4 years >everyone laughs, but he doesn't >next week, other friend says he's trying it >"Bro, nofap actually feels great" >entire friend group joins in eventually >I think it's stupid but whatever >suddenly group chat turns into daily accountability logs >Wei sends motivational quotes like "seed is power" >they start doing cold showers and waking up at 5am >group dynamic shifts >feel like an outsider now >they start subtly treating me as a joke >not even joking really >then Wei says he has some money and wants to have a trip with the guys >suggests going to Cancun >says it slowly, then smiles >"You know... Can coom." >they all laugh way too hard >I nope out, say I can't afford it >they go without me >group chat goes dark for a few days >suddenly flooded with panic messages >apparently Wei told them the final stage was a "ritual release" during sunrise meditation >they got caught jerking it facing the ocean, in sync, like lunatics >Wei fled the scene, never found >all my other friends got arrested and their families are left trying to get them out of Cancun. 3 Replies View Thread
Anonymous 1.87 MB JPG 06/23/25(Mon)02:19:27 No.815844 >be me >hang out with same 4 friends since high school >one friend starts working at a new tech job, meets a guy named Wei Zhang >starts inviting him to game nights, says he's "chill" >Wei's quiet at first, but kinda intense when he talks >talks about self-control a lot >brings up dopamine, productivity, all that >says he hasn't jerked off in 4 years >everyone laughs, but he doesn't >next week, other friend says he's trying it >"Bro, nofap actually feels great" >entire friend group joins in eventually >I think it's stupid but whatever >suddenly group chat turns into daily accountability logs >Wei sends motivational quotes like "seed is power" >they start doing cold showers and waking up at 5am >group dynamic shifts >feel like an outsider now >they start subtly treating me as a joke >not even joking really >then Wei says he has some money and wants to have a trip with the guys >suggests going to Cancun >says it slowly, then smiles >"You know... Can coom." >they all laugh way too hard >I nope out, say I can't afford it >they go without me >group chat goes dark for a few days >suddenly flooded with panic messages >apparently Wei told them the final stage was a "ritual release" during sunrise meditation >they got caught jerking it facing the ocean, in sync, like lunatics >Wei fled the scene, never found >all my other friends got arrested and their families are left trying to get them out of Cancun. 3 Replies View Thread

Greentext Stories

Anon takes a shower | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)23:06:12 No.936143504 >be taking a shower >wash ass with shower head > little spray of hot water shoots up my hole >feelsgoodman >do it some more >couple of wet farty bubbles squeak out >get hard >push shower head up my ass and spray boiling water on prostate >balls starting to twitch >suddenly I'm e---------- semen and diarrhea >boiling diarrhea shooting from my mouth and nose >bathroom flooded with septic half-digested food and semen >sister comes in, starts writhing on the floor massaging stinking semen mix into her vagina >don't you ever knock? >she starts giving birth to puppies >every puppy has my face Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)23:07:51 No.936143567
Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)23:06:12 No.936143504 >be taking a shower >wash ass with shower head > little spray of hot water shoots up my hole >feelsgoodman >do it some more >couple of wet farty bubbles squeak out >get hard >push shower head up my ass and spray boiling water on prostate >balls starting to twitch >suddenly I'm e---------- semen and diarrhea >boiling diarrhea shooting from my mouth and nose >bathroom flooded with septic half-digested food and semen >sister comes in, starts writhing on the floor massaging stinking semen mix into her vagina >don't you ever knock? >she starts giving birth to puppies >every puppy has my face Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)23:07:51 No.936143567

Greentext Stories

Anon is immortal | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous F 55 KB JPG 06/23/25(Mon) 15:14:34 No.936143779 >be driving >almost get in an accident 4 times in 2 hours >in one of them almost hit a car and lose control in a crowded road, handled it like a champ and didn't hit anything >be put in a life or death situation every other week >survive s--- that should have killed me just cause >go into high crime areas alone at night >nothing happens No joke I think I'm imortal
: Anonymous F 55 KB JPG 06/23/25(Mon) 15:14:34 No.936143779 >be driving >almost get in an accident 4 times in 2 hours >in one of them almost hit a car and lose control in a crowded road, handled it like a champ and didn't hit anything >be put in a life or death situation every other week >survive s--- that should have killed me just cause >go into high crime areas alone at night >nothing happens No joke I think I'm imortal

Greentext Stories

Anons downtown adventures | /r/Greentext

File: smokingkitty_2.jpg (95 KB, 1280x960) ☐ old lady i met while grocery shopping tw1236136 08/26/23(Sat)21:33:34 No.905023774 [Reply] >>905024395 >>905024527 >>905025849 >be me 6 months ago >walking home after going grocery shopping >old lady walks up to me >"what bus do i take to get to downtown?" >i tell her what bus to take as i walk her to the bus station >she tells me about her current life situation >roommate stole her belongings and left >tells me she has been outside all day trying to walk back home >we reach the bus station >as shes about to leave i tell her to wait >i give her a couple of drinks i brought from the grocery store because i felt bad >she says thanks and tells me goodnight >i smile and say goodnight >i walk home i hope that old lady is ok
File: smokingkitty_2.jpg (95 KB, 1280x960) ☐ old lady i met while grocery shopping tw1236136 08/26/23(Sat)21:33:34 No.905023774 [Reply] >>905024395 >>905024527 >>905025849 >be me 6 months ago >walking home after going grocery shopping >old lady walks up to me >"what bus do i take to get to downtown?" >i tell her what bus to take as i walk her to the bus station >she tells me about her current life situation >roommate stole her belongings and left >tells me she has been outside all day trying to walk back home >we reach the bus station >as shes about to leave i tell her to wait >i give her a couple of drinks i brought from the grocery store because i felt bad >she says thanks and tells me goodnight >i smile and say goodnight >i walk home i hope that old lady is ok

Greentext Stories

Dating advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 26 KB PNG 06/23/25(Mon)02:14:53 No.81578896 >i want a girlfriend!! >but i will NEVER EVER socialize, go outside, touch grass, try to be likeable or work on myself! >i will whine on 4chan for the rest of my life because this handsome guy gets thirst comments from women online! see, HE has it easy because he was born 6'4, shredded and handsome and has never ever put any amount of work into looking good! why are incels like this : Anonymous >>81578917 # : Anonymous 38 KB JPG 06/23/25(Mon)02:16:20 No.81578910 06/23/25(Mon)02:16:53 No.81578915 >want girlfriend >have social life >go outside every day >touch grass regularly >try to be likeable >keep yourself in shape >women still have no interest in you
: Anonymous 26 KB PNG 06/23/25(Mon)02:14:53 No.81578896 >i want a girlfriend!! >but i will NEVER EVER socialize, go outside, touch grass, try to be likeable or work on myself! >i will whine on 4chan for the rest of my life because this handsome guy gets thirst comments from women online! see, HE has it easy because he was born 6'4, shredded and handsome and has never ever put any amount of work into looking good! why are incels like this : Anonymous >>81578917 # : Anonymous 38 KB JPG 06/23/25(Mon)02:16:20 No.81578910 06/23/25(Mon)02:16:53 No.81578915 >want girlfriend >have social life >go outside every day >touch grass regularly >try to be likeable >keep yourself in shape >women still have no interest in you

Greentext Stories

What was the suprise? It supposedly was going to be "remembered for centuries" or something | /r/Gre...

Anonymous (ID: JNhKv8JX 06/22/25(Sun)10:55:14 No.508337299 1749827865606081.jpg 425 KB JPG >NOW IS OUR TIME FOR REVENGE.... >...LAUNCH OUR FINAL ATTACK >ITS COMING...BY ALLAH ITS COMING >... >YOU SHALL SEE >post Al vid >lose everything
Anonymous (ID: JNhKv8JX 06/22/25(Sun)10:55:14 No.508337299 1749827865606081.jpg 425 KB JPG >NOW IS OUR TIME FOR REVENGE.... >...LAUNCH OUR FINAL ATTACK >ITS COMING...BY ALLAH ITS COMING >... >YOU SHALL SEE >post Al vid >lose everything

Greentext Stories

Anon is Suic*dal | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 4 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)16:46:51 No.81575539 I am going to kill myself. The decision is made. I am 24 years of age and have absolutely nothing going for me and to be honest I dont even think I want things to get better. I always rejected suicide and thought of it as a p---- ways out of this life. I dont care about this anymore. Because this life is nothing but an illusion. We shouldnt even be conscious yet we are and we try to give meaning to our existence to cope with the chaotic nature of life. Funnily enough I never felt better than right now. No anxiety, no hatred and no regrets anymore. Somewhere in the back of my mind I still have this little fantasy in which I miraculously survive and my life just magically turns around but I have learned that life has no happy end. I dont have anyone else to tell this to so i want to say thank you to you for taking your time and reading this. Goodbye
Anonymous 4 KB JPG 06/22/25(Sun)16:46:51 No.81575539 I am going to kill myself. The decision is made. I am 24 years of age and have absolutely nothing going for me and to be honest I dont even think I want things to get better. I always rejected suicide and thought of it as a p---- ways out of this life. I dont care about this anymore. Because this life is nothing but an illusion. We shouldnt even be conscious yet we are and we try to give meaning to our existence to cope with the chaotic nature of life. Funnily enough I never felt better than right now. No anxiety, no hatred and no regrets anymore. Somewhere in the back of my mind I still have this little fantasy in which I miraculously survive and my life just magically turns around but I have learned that life has no happy end. I dont have anyone else to tell this to so i want to say thank you to you for taking your time and reading this. Goodbye

Greentext Stories

Anon goes to College. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 57 KB PNG >be me >college gooner 06/22/25(Sun)10:12:00 No.81575266 >in a discord group chat with the boys >we don't talk about faggy s--- usually but one of the boys is hitting it off with a girl so all of us kinda want to get some of that >one of the boys (ex-friend) says he has a crush coincidentally on the same girl i have a crush on and since im not doing anything about it hes going to make a move, he just wants to let us know to come clear >be mad as s--- but nobody has my back >they completely ignore me and start joking about how he's going to slip a roofie on her drink to get her pregnant >idea.jpg >wait until the middle of the night when the fellas log off >notice said crush is online so add her to the group chat >she doesnt interact but know she's silently reading >be next day, wake up >there's chaos in the group chat >they kicked her out and are going a------ >they're mad at me but i dont care >be back at college, some people are throwing me weird looks >one of the fellas comes over to me mad, turns out bitch leaked EVERYTHING >the things we said about n------, our r--- and i----- jokes, the time we all shared our sisters best pics from their instagram pages to rate them on a rapeability scale >EVERY F------ THING >The girl who was hitting it off with one of the boys wants no more contact with him >one of the sisters found out about this s--- >s--- went nuclear >the boys decided to delete the group chat and take a break from each other during summer so they kicked me out of the group chat >suspect they are still using it in secret >be now, summer, alone, no boys, no nothing anons, im about to start my sophmore year next semester, do people easily forget in college? please tell me they do
Anonymous 57 KB PNG >be me >college gooner 06/22/25(Sun)10:12:00 No.81575266 >in a discord group chat with the boys >we don't talk about faggy s--- usually but one of the boys is hitting it off with a girl so all of us kinda want to get some of that >one of the boys (ex-friend) says he has a crush coincidentally on the same girl i have a crush on and since im not doing anything about it hes going to make a move, he just wants to let us know to come clear >be mad as s--- but nobody has my back >they completely ignore me and start joking about how he's going to slip a roofie on her drink to get her pregnant >idea.jpg >wait until the middle of the night when the fellas log off >notice said crush is online so add her to the group chat >she doesnt interact but know she's silently reading >be next day, wake up >there's chaos in the group chat >they kicked her out and are going a------ >they're mad at me but i dont care >be back at college, some people are throwing me weird looks >one of the fellas comes over to me mad, turns out bitch leaked EVERYTHING >the things we said about n------, our r--- and i----- jokes, the time we all shared our sisters best pics from their instagram pages to rate them on a rapeability scale >EVERY F------ THING >The girl who was hitting it off with one of the boys wants no more contact with him >one of the sisters found out about this s--- >s--- went nuclear >the boys decided to delete the group chat and take a break from each other during summer so they kicked me out of the group chat >suspect they are still using it in secret >be now, summer, alone, no boys, no nothing anons, im about to start my sophmore year next semester, do people easily forget in college? please tell me they do

Greentext Stories

Anon looks-maxxing | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/11/25(Wed)19:11:12 No.211362044 >>211362044 # >1. How I want to look >2. How I think I look >3. How I actually look Lime H 7NCS
Anonymous 06/11/25(Wed)19:11:12 No.211362044 >>211362044 # >1. How I want to look >2. How I think I look >3. How I actually look Lime H 7NCS

Greentext Stories

Life of the party | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 216 KB JPG 08/13/20(Thu)16:15:00 No.59554950 >sitting alone in room playing vidya >get text from old friend who ghosted me once he went full chadmode >havent talked to him in years >"bro come out tonight (address and time)" >the time is literally 20 minutes away >typical chad >decide f--- it i havent hungout with people in forever ill regret it if i dont go >shower and get dressed >pickup some beers on the way there just as a friendly gesture to chad >pullup to a house that has cars loaded on the road and on the front yard >music blaring >walk up to the front door and enter because its wide open >walk around and see nobody i know >finally find chad hanging with his new group of friends >walk up to him and say hello and hold up the beers and say look what i got >he says hey and says he didnt know i was friends with (owner of the house) >say im not >he asks who invited me >i say he texted me >he makes a sudden realization face and then says "ooooooh i meant to text another (my name) sorry man, damn that means i didnt invite him, let me call him right now" and walks off while making a call >put the beers down on the counter and go back to my car and go back home
Anonymous 216 KB JPG 08/13/20(Thu)16:15:00 No.59554950 >sitting alone in room playing vidya >get text from old friend who ghosted me once he went full chadmode >havent talked to him in years >"bro come out tonight (address and time)" >the time is literally 20 minutes away >typical chad >decide f--- it i havent hungout with people in forever ill regret it if i dont go >shower and get dressed >pickup some beers on the way there just as a friendly gesture to chad >pullup to a house that has cars loaded on the road and on the front yard >music blaring >walk up to the front door and enter because its wide open >walk around and see nobody i know >finally find chad hanging with his new group of friends >walk up to him and say hello and hold up the beers and say look what i got >he says hey and says he didnt know i was friends with (owner of the house) >say im not >he asks who invited me >i say he texted me >he makes a sudden realization face and then says "ooooooh i meant to text another (my name) sorry man, damn that means i didnt invite him, let me call him right now" and walks off while making a call >put the beers down on the counter and go back to my car and go back home

Greentext Stories

Roadkill king | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 3.29 MB PNG I'd ever have 06/22/25(Sun)12:04:24 No.149108237 >be me >pop Over the Hedge into the family DVD player >expect cute animal antics >Heather the possum girl hits the screen >my tiny monkey brain combusts >goth, dramatic, fakes her own death >the blueprint for every unstable crush >start lying motionless in neighbor's yard for hours >pretend to be dead so Heather will come revive me with possum kisses >neighbor calls animal control >animal control guy pokes me with a broom >I moan "Heather..." >fast forward >older now, but no wiser >every goth girl I date must squeak and pretend to expire mid-makeout >if she doesn't, she's gone >make girlfriend wear fuzzy ears, hiss at me, crawl in trash bags >neighbors complain about "animal noises" from my bedroom >one night, blackout drunk behind Wendy's dumpster >see actual possum rooting through fries >whimper "Heather..." and reach out >it hisses, I hiss back >moment of pure, primal connection >next morning: wake up half-naked in alley, fur in my teeth >don't care, would do it again >current gf calls me her "roadkill king" >we roleplay car accident foreplay >I moan her possum name when I finish >one day death will claim me for real >pray my rotting corpse finds her on the other side of the hedge >never coming back
Anonymous 3.29 MB PNG I'd ever have 06/22/25(Sun)12:04:24 No.149108237 >be me >pop Over the Hedge into the family DVD player >expect cute animal antics >Heather the possum girl hits the screen >my tiny monkey brain combusts >goth, dramatic, fakes her own death >the blueprint for every unstable crush >start lying motionless in neighbor's yard for hours >pretend to be dead so Heather will come revive me with possum kisses >neighbor calls animal control >animal control guy pokes me with a broom >I moan "Heather..." >fast forward >older now, but no wiser >every goth girl I date must squeak and pretend to expire mid-makeout >if she doesn't, she's gone >make girlfriend wear fuzzy ears, hiss at me, crawl in trash bags >neighbors complain about "animal noises" from my bedroom >one night, blackout drunk behind Wendy's dumpster >see actual possum rooting through fries >whimper "Heather..." and reach out >it hisses, I hiss back >moment of pure, primal connection >next morning: wake up half-naked in alley, fur in my teeth >don't care, would do it again >current gf calls me her "roadkill king" >we roleplay car accident foreplay >I moan her possum name when I finish >one day death will claim me for real >pray my rotting corpse finds her on the other side of the hedge >never coming back

Greentext Stories

anon is stuck in a never ending cycle | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Settings Mobile Home 08/13/24(Tue)16:50:40 No.78481928 You Tube 39 KB PNG >Really like a YT video >Want to save it to make a YTP >Copy the URL >Type in "YouTube to MP4" >Click on the first result >"This website wants to know your location" >Click Deny >Click where you're supposed to paste in the link >P--- popup >Click deny >Close popup >Paste in link >Click Convert >P--- popup >Close popup >"Converting" < > >Go back to google >Click on the second result >Rinse and repeat I know one of them will work. MP4
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Settings Mobile Home 08/13/24(Tue)16:50:40 No.78481928 You Tube 39 KB PNG >Really like a YT video >Want to save it to make a YTP >Copy the URL >Type in "YouTube to MP4" >Click on the first result >"This website wants to know your location" >Click Deny >Click where you're supposed to paste in the link >P--- popup >Click deny >Close popup >Paste in link >Click Convert >P--- popup >Close popup >"Converting" < > >Go back to google >Click on the second result >Rinse and repeat I know one of them will work. MP4

Greentext Stories

Anon is in trouble | /r/Greentext

Lenticular UFO_cloud.jpg (111 KB, 900x675) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)06:28:59 No.40579790 >>40579853 Statistically speaking, someone is currently getting abducted and a--- probed by aliens right now. 1 Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)07:00:17 No.40579853 >>40579858 ayylmao.jpg (122 KB, 500x800) google yandex iqdb wait >>40579790 (OP) >BE ME >LITERALLY RIGHT NOW >GETTING ANALLY PROBED >OHSWEETJESUSNO.MP3 >LUCKILY THEY DIDN'T TAKE MY PHONE >POST THIS ON/X/ SO SOMEONE WILL COME SAVE ME >MFW YOU F------ THINK THIS IS A JOKE
Lenticular UFO_cloud.jpg (111 KB, 900x675) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)06:28:59 No.40579790 >>40579853 Statistically speaking, someone is currently getting abducted and a--- probed by aliens right now. 1 Anonymous 06/22/25(Sun)07:00:17 No.40579853 >>40579858 ayylmao.jpg (122 KB, 500x800) google yandex iqdb wait >>40579790 (OP) >BE ME >LITERALLY RIGHT NOW >GETTING ANALLY PROBED >OHSWEETJESUSNO.MP3 >LUCKILY THEY DIDN'T TAKE MY PHONE >POST THIS ON/X/ SO SOMEONE WILL COME SAVE ME >MFW YOU F------ THINK THIS IS A JOKE

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