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Anon has a loving girlfriend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 193 KB JPG 07/21/23(Fri)22:13:16 No.29412070 >hire a prostitute >exchange nudes >talk for a while as well >decide to cancel our meet (was only in town for a few days) >she tells me she wants to be my gf, she loves me, is only doing this for the money cause she's poor >talk for a couple of weeks, keeps asking for money as well as asking how my day is going >reluctantly send some cash or giftcards on occassion >say no and refuse often because I don't want to be taken advantage of >started to gradually enjoy talking to her and the conversation, enjoyed hearing that she loves me, but not quite in love with her after only two weeks >start to open up a bit more >today she asks me to funnel bitcoin to her through cashapp till she gets back on her feet >say no >she blows up and tells me she's sick and tired of being paitent with me, that if I love her it shouldn't be that hard to do, that I'm the only one she can trust >just feels too shady, say we're done, block number I just wanted to vent, I feel bad, and I know you c---- will s--- on me for it, but I want to know if what I did was bad or not. Was it? It feels bad
: Anonymous 193 KB JPG 07/21/23(Fri)22:13:16 No.29412070 >hire a prostitute >exchange nudes >talk for a while as well >decide to cancel our meet (was only in town for a few days) >she tells me she wants to be my gf, she loves me, is only doing this for the money cause she's poor >talk for a couple of weeks, keeps asking for money as well as asking how my day is going >reluctantly send some cash or giftcards on occassion >say no and refuse often because I don't want to be taken advantage of >started to gradually enjoy talking to her and the conversation, enjoyed hearing that she loves me, but not quite in love with her after only two weeks >start to open up a bit more >today she asks me to funnel bitcoin to her through cashapp till she gets back on her feet >say no >she blows up and tells me she's sick and tired of being paitent with me, that if I love her it shouldn't be that hard to do, that I'm the only one she can trust >just feels too shady, say we're done, block number I just wanted to vent, I feel bad, and I know you c---- will s--- on me for it, but I want to know if what I did was bad or not. Was it? It feels bad

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Anon refuses to be normie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri)23:17:43 No.903022608 >for years, write silly fun greentext stories to entertain you /b/oys >find great joy out of this activity >2 months ago, get married >take time off from fourchan >2 months later, be today >excited to write another greentext >been sitting here for 2 hours trying to think of something but can't >can't even remember what the purpose of this place is >pepe starting to feel like a distant memory >heart sinking as /b/ is fading from my mind 256 KB JPG this marriage has taken away my soul /b/ this woman has ruined who I once was, extinguished our bond I don't want this to end /b/ hold my hand /b/ I can't let you go, you are all there is to me
: Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri)23:17:43 No.903022608 >for years, write silly fun greentext stories to entertain you /b/oys >find great joy out of this activity >2 months ago, get married >take time off from fourchan >2 months later, be today >excited to write another greentext >been sitting here for 2 hours trying to think of something but can't >can't even remember what the purpose of this place is >pepe starting to feel like a distant memory >heart sinking as /b/ is fading from my mind 256 KB JPG this marriage has taken away my soul /b/ this woman has ruined who I once was, extinguished our bond I don't want this to end /b/ hold my hand /b/ I can't let you go, you are all there is to me

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Anon needs a doctor | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Pimple on penis 33 KB JPG 07/21/23(Fri)09:14:26 No.29406852 >whitehead on shaft of penis >been there two weeks despite showering thoroughly twice a day >virgin, so not STD What do
Anonymous Pimple on penis 33 KB JPG 07/21/23(Fri)09:14:26 No.29406852 >whitehead on shaft of penis >been there two weeks despite showering thoroughly twice a day >virgin, so not STD What do

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Anon loves the holidays | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 546 KB PNG 07/21/23(Fri)18:29:34 No.29410383 How do I get my boyfriend to stop hating Christmas? >be my boyfriend >2001 >7 years old >his best friend visits him during Christmas Break >they play together in his treehouse >play a game of Tag >my boyfriend accidentally shoves her while 'tagging' her when she's close to the entrance/exit and she topples out the treehouse >she dies >his mother, who had a litany of health problems and wasn't expected to live longer than a year or two, has a heart attack and dies upon hearing the news >the father commits suicide shortly thereafter I love Christmas and want him to enjoy it with me, but he wants nothing to do with the holiday
: Anonymous 546 KB PNG 07/21/23(Fri)18:29:34 No.29410383 How do I get my boyfriend to stop hating Christmas? >be my boyfriend >2001 >7 years old >his best friend visits him during Christmas Break >they play together in his treehouse >play a game of Tag >my boyfriend accidentally shoves her while 'tagging' her when she's close to the entrance/exit and she topples out the treehouse >she dies >his mother, who had a litany of health problems and wasn't expected to live longer than a year or two, has a heart attack and dies upon hearing the news >the father commits suicide shortly thereafter I love Christmas and want him to enjoy it with me, but he wants nothing to do with the holiday

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Anon is a fan of skibidi toilet | /r/Greentext

Chud Just now No4040116 File (hide): 1689956294584.png (32.94 KB, 600x800, 7547363267883.png) ImgOps >Made by whites (no ESL elsagate slop) >No globohomo brainwashing >Cameramen use clever engineering and strategy while toilets just launch masses at you (metaphor for coming race war) >RuZZian artist Skibidi toilet is the most a---- thing a gen alpha kid can watch right now.
Chud Just now No4040116 File (hide): 1689956294584.png (32.94 KB, 600x800, 7547363267883.png) ImgOps >Made by whites (no ESL elsagate slop) >No globohomo brainwashing >Cameramen use clever engineering and strategy while toilets just launch masses at you (metaphor for coming race war) >RuZZian artist Skibidi toilet is the most a---- thing a gen alpha kid can watch right now.

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The crow war screencap

Highest possible quality
Highest possible quality

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Anon takes down a terrorist | /r/Greentext

File: enough.jpg (469 KB, 935x644) That's enough David! >he doesn't do anything violent with them >s--- we need to get bigger >agents sell him an AK-47 >he doesn't do anything >why won't he do anything >we get bigger >agents sell him grenades >he doesn't do anything >f--- it >send in the boys >bust down his door >he pulls out a hand gun >shoots two of our officers I'm such a good agent Anonymous 07/18/23(Tue)02:11:36 No.74070250 >be me >be high ranking official in the FBI >one of my agents hears of a teenager using slurs during a school fight he didn't start >we have 5 agents checking his social media >banned from Reddit for disagreeing about trans in sports >frequents the forbidden frog sight which shall not be named >more extremist views like mass immigration is bad >send in undercover agents >agents sell him illegal handguns >he buys them >the remaining officer retreats to the barricade >the terrorist comes out and fires off an automatic weapon >he kills another nine officers before he is downed >we investigate his house >he had many illegal weapons including grenades and the AK-47 which he used against us >I knew he was a criminal >get promoted for taking down the extremist >>74070291
File: enough.jpg (469 KB, 935x644) That's enough David! >he doesn't do anything violent with them >s--- we need to get bigger >agents sell him an AK-47 >he doesn't do anything >why won't he do anything >we get bigger >agents sell him grenades >he doesn't do anything >f--- it >send in the boys >bust down his door >he pulls out a hand gun >shoots two of our officers I'm such a good agent Anonymous 07/18/23(Tue)02:11:36 No.74070250 >be me >be high ranking official in the FBI >one of my agents hears of a teenager using slurs during a school fight he didn't start >we have 5 agents checking his social media >banned from Reddit for disagreeing about trans in sports >frequents the forbidden frog sight which shall not be named >more extremist views like mass immigration is bad >send in undercover agents >agents sell him illegal handguns >he buys them >the remaining officer retreats to the barricade >the terrorist comes out and fires off an automatic weapon >he kills another nine officers before he is downed >we investigate his house >he had many illegal weapons including grenades and the AK-47 which he used against us >I knew he was a criminal >get promoted for taking down the extremist >>74070291

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Anon sees barbie alone | /r/Greentext

Do not watch Barbie alone! Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri)10:00:18 No. 187814618 ► >>187814759 >>187814993 >>187815576 >>187815592 >>187815653 >>187815960 >>187816020 >>187816036 >>187816085 >>187816124 >>187816126 >>187816156 >>187816166 >>187816200 >>187816233 >>187816271 >>187816273 >>187816306 >>187816353 >>187816464>>187816718 >>187816726 >>187816770 >>187816937 >>187816951 >>187817272 >>187817390 >>187817551 >>187817876 >>187819108 >>187819111 >>187819284>>187819320 >>187819901 >>187820178 >>187820449 >>187820743 >>187820788 >>187820828 >>187820839 >>187821068 >>187821079 >>187821115 >>187821630 >>187821714>>187821962 >>187822011 >>187822417 >>187822987 >>187824219 >>187824541 >>187825009 >>187825114 >>187826453 >>187826492 >>187826977 >>187827119 >>187827166 Just had the worst cinema experience of my life >Book ticket to see Barbie to see what all the hype is about >No frens so just me, seated in the middle of the theatre, only a few other seats booked far away >Check back on the booking shortly before the movie and almost the entire theatre is booked out >Arrive at the kinoplex, get my popcorn and drink, notice everyone else in the queue is wearing pink, 90% women >panic.jpg >When I enter the cinema everyone is in groups of 4 or more, all wearing matching outfits, pink, sparkly, cowboy hats etc. >I'm wearing a grey hoodie and jeans >Have to squeeze past group of girls to get to my seat, they start giggling and whispering >Accidentally step on one of their feet >Sit down in my seat, immediately the girl next to me swaps seats so her boyfriend is next to me >Couple minutes later the seat on my other side is taken by a couple with children >Hear whispers, giggling, snickering during the entirety of the trailers, can see the girls looking at me >The boyfriend asks me why I'm seeing Barbie alone >Say I'm waiting for my friend to arrive >He doesn't reply, turns to girlfriend and they whisper to eachother >Heart beating fast, start sweating >Father of the family on my other side keeps glaring at me >Decide it's not worth it, get up and leave, squeeze past girls again and hear them laughing as I leave the theatre Do not see this movie alone, that was awful and completely ruined my week. I see every movie alone and I've never had this kind of experience before, probably not going to the cinema again anytime soon
Do not watch Barbie alone! Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri)10:00:18 No. 187814618 ► >>187814759 >>187814993 >>187815576 >>187815592 >>187815653 >>187815960 >>187816020 >>187816036 >>187816085 >>187816124 >>187816126 >>187816156 >>187816166 >>187816200 >>187816233 >>187816271 >>187816273 >>187816306 >>187816353 >>187816464>>187816718 >>187816726 >>187816770 >>187816937 >>187816951 >>187817272 >>187817390 >>187817551 >>187817876 >>187819108 >>187819111 >>187819284>>187819320 >>187819901 >>187820178 >>187820449 >>187820743 >>187820788 >>187820828 >>187820839 >>187821068 >>187821079 >>187821115 >>187821630 >>187821714>>187821962 >>187822011 >>187822417 >>187822987 >>187824219 >>187824541 >>187825009 >>187825114 >>187826453 >>187826492 >>187826977 >>187827119 >>187827166 Just had the worst cinema experience of my life >Book ticket to see Barbie to see what all the hype is about >No frens so just me, seated in the middle of the theatre, only a few other seats booked far away >Check back on the booking shortly before the movie and almost the entire theatre is booked out >Arrive at the kinoplex, get my popcorn and drink, notice everyone else in the queue is wearing pink, 90% women >panic.jpg >When I enter the cinema everyone is in groups of 4 or more, all wearing matching outfits, pink, sparkly, cowboy hats etc. >I'm wearing a grey hoodie and jeans >Have to squeeze past group of girls to get to my seat, they start giggling and whispering >Accidentally step on one of their feet >Sit down in my seat, immediately the girl next to me swaps seats so her boyfriend is next to me >Couple minutes later the seat on my other side is taken by a couple with children >Hear whispers, giggling, snickering during the entirety of the trailers, can see the girls looking at me >The boyfriend asks me why I'm seeing Barbie alone >Say I'm waiting for my friend to arrive >He doesn't reply, turns to girlfriend and they whisper to eachother >Heart beating fast, start sweating >Father of the family on my other side keeps glaring at me >Decide it's not worth it, get up and leave, squeeze past girls again and hear them laughing as I leave the theatre Do not see this movie alone, that was awful and completely ruined my week. I see every movie alone and I've never had this kind of experience before, probably not going to the cinema again anytime soon

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Anon builds a coop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous yeah nah you're a c--- 24 KB JPG >>4563436 # 07/06/23(Thu)13:41:50 No.4562399 >Build coop >Chickens don't go in and just chill in the run >Build roosts >Chickens refuse to use them and just sleep on the floor Just thankless work
: Anonymous yeah nah you're a c--- 24 KB JPG >>4563436 # 07/06/23(Thu)13:41:50 No.4562399 >Build coop >Chickens don't go in and just chill in the run >Build roosts >Chickens refuse to use them and just sleep on the floor Just thankless work

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Anon takes a shit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/19/19(Thu)10:31:39 No.54480871 >be in public bathroom >it's empty >I can finally take a dump >go to one of the stalls and start cranking a fat s--- out of my ass >turd is 90% out of my a------ before the bathroom door bursts open >I hear punching and grunting >I look under my stall and see 2 pairs of feet >they are beating the s--- out of each other >suddenly hear a mirror shatter and hear one of the guys fall to the ground >bathroom is silent except for heavy breathing >feel my turd disconnecting from the mainland >f--- no f--- no f--- no >turd plops into water >echos >heavy breathing stops 125 KB JPG
: Anonymous 09/19/19(Thu)10:31:39 No.54480871 >be in public bathroom >it's empty >I can finally take a dump >go to one of the stalls and start cranking a fat s--- out of my ass >turd is 90% out of my a------ before the bathroom door bursts open >I hear punching and grunting >I look under my stall and see 2 pairs of feet >they are beating the s--- out of each other >suddenly hear a mirror shatter and hear one of the guys fall to the ground >bathroom is silent except for heavy breathing >feel my turd disconnecting from the mainland >f--- no f--- no f--- no >turd plops into water >echos >heavy breathing stops 125 KB JPG

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It be like that | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 266 KB JPG 4 Replies Anonymous >no inheritance bonus points 07/21/23(Fri)09:48:32 No.74105776 Anonymous >have never had own room as a kid >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent >have to share a rented room with people I don't know >mfw will never experience having personal space >have never had own room as a kid check >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent check >have to share a rented room with people I don't know check >mfw will never experience having personal space check >>74106026 # View Thread 07/21/23(Fri)10:03:02 No.74105877 07/21/23(Fri)10:16:52 No.74105965 Be sure to thank the world economic forum for what they have blessed you with.
Anonymous 266 KB JPG 4 Replies Anonymous >no inheritance bonus points 07/21/23(Fri)09:48:32 No.74105776 Anonymous >have never had own room as a kid >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent >have to share a rented room with people I don't know >mfw will never experience having personal space >have never had own room as a kid check >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent check >have to share a rented room with people I don't know check >mfw will never experience having personal space check >>74106026 # View Thread 07/21/23(Fri)10:03:02 No.74105877 07/21/23(Fri)10:16:52 No.74105965 Be sure to thank the world economic forum for what they have blessed you with.

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Anon is a gaybo | /r/Greentext

: Sage Am I aromantic? I have never been attracted to a woman romantically. I've never imagine myself with a woman going to a park and have a fun time. Romance in general seems totally ubiquitous to me. I am only interested in raw animalistic sex tbqh. I cringe every time someone says that f------ a girl without getting romantically attracted to her is unfulfilling. I am a virgin but I think having sex with hookers is 100% hotter than cuddling with a cute girl. 197 KB JPG 07/20/23(Thu)20:37:30 No.74101485 7 Replies View Thread
: Sage Am I aromantic? I have never been attracted to a woman romantically. I've never imagine myself with a woman going to a park and have a fun time. Romance in general seems totally ubiquitous to me. I am only interested in raw animalistic sex tbqh. I cringe every time someone says that f------ a girl without getting romantically attracted to her is unfulfilling. I am a virgin but I think having sex with hookers is 100% hotter than cuddling with a cute girl. 197 KB JPG 07/20/23(Thu)20:37:30 No.74101485 7 Replies View Thread

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Anon know an Iranian | /r/Greentext

1h (5/28 15:38) 63880930 5 Re 2 Img JPG 45KB (680 × 760) 4 Replies . GENDER REVEAL >have an Iranian online friend >he is secretly an atheist and basically a liberal >I tell him everything about western women >he changes his mind and becomes a muslim again Umm, based?
1h (5/28 15:38) 63880930 5 Re 2 Img JPG 45KB (680 × 760) 4 Replies . GENDER REVEAL >have an Iranian online friend >he is secretly an atheist and basically a liberal >I tell him everything about western women >he changes his mind and becomes a muslim again Umm, based?

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Anon shits his britches | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri) 13:33:44 No.902994122 8 KB JPG >Be me >5 months ago in class >Stomach upset from s----- state- funded school "lunch" > Take a chance on a fart > End up loudly and wetly s------- myself in Calculus class >So loud that people in the hallway heard and are laughing > Bubbling s--- leaks from the top of my jeans so I try to shove it in with no luck >Liquid feces all over my chair so I try to pick it up and scoop it back in my s----- pants >Coughing and gagging with tears in my eyes >Realize everyone including the teacher is staring at me >Run out crying but leave a s----- trail of dump to the bathroom >Wash my s----- pants out in the sink to no avail >There's liquid s--- all over the bathroom > Just f------ walk out I got f------ suspended for the remainder of the year. Kids got videos on snapchat and the whole school calls me Captain S----shake. I might genuinely kill myself over this. The rest of my life is completely f----- and I can't recover from this man what the f---
Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri) 13:33:44 No.902994122 8 KB JPG >Be me >5 months ago in class >Stomach upset from s----- state- funded school "lunch" > Take a chance on a fart > End up loudly and wetly s------- myself in Calculus class >So loud that people in the hallway heard and are laughing > Bubbling s--- leaks from the top of my jeans so I try to shove it in with no luck >Liquid feces all over my chair so I try to pick it up and scoop it back in my s----- pants >Coughing and gagging with tears in my eyes >Realize everyone including the teacher is staring at me >Run out crying but leave a s----- trail of dump to the bathroom >Wash my s----- pants out in the sink to no avail >There's liquid s--- all over the bathroom > Just f------ walk out I got f------ suspended for the remainder of the year. Kids got videos on snapchat and the whole school calls me Captain S----shake. I might genuinely kill myself over this. The rest of my life is completely f----- and I can't recover from this man what the f---

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Anon eats some Scooby Snacks | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Nel SCOOBY-DON GRAHAM CRACKER SNACKS CINNAMON SLODEV. SORBY WASTN NET WT1 02 2 07/21/23(Fri)12:28:15 No.74107163 ZomboMeme 1741.jpg 67 KB JPG >Be me, school f-- >Fat f--- that cant wait for lunch >Start eating some Scooby snack crackers >Some asian kid sees me "Ha, youre eating dog food?" "F--- you, you eat dogs" >The skinny s--- runs to tell the teacher >Get sent to principals office Fml >Get chewed out "This is a bully free zone, blah blah blah, racism will not be tolerated, blah blah blah" >Zone out for a bit and wonder about lunch >Principal notices "Are you listening?!" "Yes" "What was the last thing I said?" >F---, start panicking "You asked if I was listening" Principal calls my home. Dad just laughs at me but my mom shakes her head in disappointment
: Anonymous Nel SCOOBY-DON GRAHAM CRACKER SNACKS CINNAMON SLODEV. SORBY WASTN NET WT1 02 2 07/21/23(Fri)12:28:15 No.74107163 ZomboMeme 1741.jpg 67 KB JPG >Be me, school f-- >Fat f--- that cant wait for lunch >Start eating some Scooby snack crackers >Some asian kid sees me "Ha, youre eating dog food?" "F--- you, you eat dogs" >The skinny s--- runs to tell the teacher >Get sent to principals office Fml >Get chewed out "This is a bully free zone, blah blah blah, racism will not be tolerated, blah blah blah" >Zone out for a bit and wonder about lunch >Principal notices "Are you listening?!" "Yes" "What was the last thing I said?" >F---, start panicking "You asked if I was listening" Principal calls my home. Dad just laughs at me but my mom shakes her head in disappointment

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Aron dont know what to do at UNI | /r/Greentext

File: 1397837437585.jpg-(44 KB, 421x834, 21f.jpg) Anonymous (ID: 8rz7iHpQ) 04/18/14(Fri) 19:10:37 UTC+3 No.542805150 [Reply] >Be me >At University (college for you amerifags) >Boring as f--- lecture, and my stomach is churning because I was out drinking last night >Chance a fart >Doesn't make any noise but suddenly I feel something down there >shatmypants.jpg >oh f--- >Pants filled with semi-liquid s---, cant risk leaving to clean up >People start to smell it and are turning and looking in my direction >I figure f--- it I'm not sitting with my pants full of s---- >Get up slowly and waddle carefully towards the doors >Literally 1 metre from the door and I feel something roll down my leg >Look behind me, see a p------------ on the floor, people are pointing and whispering >Freeze like a rabbit in the headlights >What the f--- am I supposed to do? Leave it there? Play it off? Pretend it's not mine? Take it with me? >For some reason I decide the best course of action is to pretend to faint >Fall over badly, shoulder lands on the s--- >Roll over to get out of s--- >Realise how fake this looks so I start twitching >Really badly faked seizure, nobody gets up to help, everyone just staring at me rolling around on the floor in my own s--- >No one buying it >Get up and walk out Have to see these people every day.
File: 1397837437585.jpg-(44 KB, 421x834, 21f.jpg) Anonymous (ID: 8rz7iHpQ) 04/18/14(Fri) 19:10:37 UTC+3 No.542805150 [Reply] >Be me >At University (college for you amerifags) >Boring as f--- lecture, and my stomach is churning because I was out drinking last night >Chance a fart >Doesn't make any noise but suddenly I feel something down there >shatmypants.jpg >oh f--- >Pants filled with semi-liquid s---, cant risk leaving to clean up >People start to smell it and are turning and looking in my direction >I figure f--- it I'm not sitting with my pants full of s---- >Get up slowly and waddle carefully towards the doors >Literally 1 metre from the door and I feel something roll down my leg >Look behind me, see a p------------ on the floor, people are pointing and whispering >Freeze like a rabbit in the headlights >What the f--- am I supposed to do? Leave it there? Play it off? Pretend it's not mine? Take it with me? >For some reason I decide the best course of action is to pretend to faint >Fall over badly, shoulder lands on the s--- >Roll over to get out of s--- >Realise how fake this looks so I start twitching >Really badly faked seizure, nobody gets up to help, everyone just staring at me rolling around on the floor in my own s--- >No one buying it >Get up and walk out Have to see these people every day.

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