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1123 Views • Created 7 years ago By Major Bummer • Updated 6 years ago

Created By Major Bummer • Updated 6 years ago

stuff to know if you have a

Stuff you know if you have an AK. Stuff you know if you have an AR Stuff you know if you have a Mosin Nagant You have S9 per ounce special non-detergent synthetic teflon infused It works though you have never cleaned it. Ever You are able to hit the broad side of a barn from inside Cheap mags are fun to buy Your safety can be heard 300m away Your rifle comes with a cheap nylon s Your bayonet makes a good wire cutter You can put a 30" hole through 12" of oak, if you can hit it oil for cleaning You are able to hit the broad side of a ban from 600m. Cheap mags melt You can silently flip off the safety with your finger on the trigger Your rifle has a 9 point stealth tactical suspension system. Your bayonet is actually a pretty good steak knife You can put one hole in a paper target at 100m with 30 rounds It was last cleaned in Berlin in 1945 You can hit the farm from two counties over What's a mag? What's a safety? Your rifle has dog collars Your bayonet is longer than your leg You can knock down everyone else's target just from the shock wave of your bullet going downrange When out of ammo, your rifle makes a supreme war chub, pike, boat oar, tent When out of ammo, your rifle will nominally pass as a chub. When out of ammo, your rifle makes a great whifle bat What's recoi? 1S ea oil often used to relocate shoulders thrown out by the previous shot. even Your sight adjustment goes to '10', and you've never bothered moving it. Your sight adjustment is incremented in fractions of minute of angle. Your sight adjustment goes to 12 miles and you've actually tried it. Your rifle can be used by any two bit nation's most iliterate conscripts to Your rifile is used by elite forces worldwide to fight two bit nations most fight elite forces worldwide Your rifle won some revolutions illterate conscripts Your rifle won the cold war You paid S900 You lovingly reload precision crafted rounds one by one. Your riftle has fought against itself and won every time. Your rile won a pole vault event You paid S59.95 You dig your ammo out of a farmer's field in Ukraine and it works just fine You can bayonet your foe on the other side of the river without leaving the comfort You paid S350 You buy cheap ammo by the case Your foes laugh when you mount your bayonet. Service life, 40 years You can change cartridge sizes with the push of a couple of pins and a You believe no real man would dare risk the ridicule of his friends by suggesting You can intimidate your foe with the bayonet mounted. Service life, 50 years ervice Life, 100 years Its easier to buy a new rifle when you want to change cartridge sizes.Y there is anything but 7.62x54r new upper. You can repair your rife by taking it to a certified gunsmith, it's under You can repair your rifle with a big hammer and a swift kick. If your rifle breaks, you buy a new one You consider it a badge of honor when you get your handguards to burst You consider it a badge of honor when you shoot a sub-MOA 5 shot You consider it a badge of honor when you cycle 5 rounds without the aid of a After a long day at the range you relax by watching "Blackhawk After a long day at the range you relax by visiting the chiropractor. THEN you After a long day at the range you relax by watching "Red Dawn. watch "Enemy at the Gates." a stiff shot of Vodka. After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for hotdogs and Apple After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for shishkabob. Your rifle's accessory is a small tin can with a funny lid, but its buried under an apartment building somewhere in Budapest. Your rifle's finish is low grade shellac, cosmoline and Olga's toe nails. You're not sure there WERE cameras to photograph Sergei Mosin. After cleaning your rile you have a strong urge for a shf shot of Vodka. Pie You can accessorize your ritfle with a new muzzle brake or a nice stock set Your rifle's finish is varnish and paint. Your wife tolerates your autographed, framed picture of Mikhail Your rifle's accessories are eight times more valuable than your rifle Your rifle's finish is Teflon and high tech polymers Your wife tolerates your autographed, framed Eugene picture of EugeneYou're not surethere WERE cameras to photograph Sergei Mosin Kalashnik Stoner ate at night you sometimes have to ight the urge to hold your rile over Late at night you sometimes have to fight the urge to clear your house, Late at night, you sometimes have to fight the urge to dig a fighting trench in the your head and shout "Wolverines!" slicing the pie from room to room. sleep in.
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