Inkling Girl's Eye - Good lord, what is happening in there?

SUPER SMASH BROTHERS SWITCH.

AT THIS TIME OF YEAR.

AT THIS TIME OF DAY

IN THIS PART OF THE DIRECT

LOCALIZED ENTIRELY BEFORE E3.

>Well Nintendo I made it, despite your stream scheduling
<Ah Nintendo Fans welcome! I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable Direct
>Myeah
[Nintendo walks into the kitchen to find a hard drive labeled "Metroid Prime 4" with water spilled all over it]
<Oh egads! my game is ruined!
[Nintendo looks out the window at a warehouse full of unsold Wii Us]
<But what if… I were to port a WiiU game and disguise it as a new one? Hohoho, delightfully devilish, Nintendo
[As Nintendo is climbing out the window, Nintendo Fans enter the office]
Nintendo with its constant ports and remakes, Nintendo Fans are gonna need some pills for headaches, when they hear how loud the octo trailer music is on Nintendo's stream, tonight!
>NIIIIIINTEEEENDOOOOO
<Nintendo fans I was just, uh, stretching my calves on the windowsill, part of a minigame from Wii Fit, care to join me?
>Why is their water all over your hard drive, Nintendo?
<Uh that isn't water, it's fuel! Fuel from the new F-Zero game we're announcing! Mmmm, F-Zero!
[Nintendo fan leaves the office, Nintendo leaps out of the window and runs to the Wii U warehouse]