"Today's contestants are the Government vs the Millennials! It's fire power vs youth power in today's showdown. What do you thinks gonna happen, Ken?"
"I think those Naruto runners have a pretty good chance, they look super fast, I can barely see 'em."
"Ken, they're just holding they're arms back and angling their bodies forward to make it look that way."
"Maybe, but those shadow clone jutsus will mean most of the governments bullets will pass right through them. Just look at all of them, I see 3 copies of everyone."
"Ken I think you should watch less cartoons and get your eyes checked. And now to someone who's just after the alien girls, Guy leDouche."
"Guy here, I'd join but they found my browser history and know all my secret techniques. Today's challenge is 51 or None. The Millennials have to navigate an obstacle course of landmines and escape with Area 51's secrets, all while dodging the Governments deadly deluge of bullets. If you want to get out of here with your alien wife and fancy tech, just don't get shot!"

Right you are, Ken.