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writing-prompt-s Instead of the Monkey's Paw, you find the Clown's Nose, which instead of granting your wish in the worst way possible will grant it in the funniest way. randomitemdrop Follow Item: the Cursed Clown Nose. Obviously to use it you have to put it on and give it a honk bluehairedspidey Follow tiawesomeness 4h ago bluehairedspidey #Wow this really works! #*honks nose* I want a million dollars #I pull a one dollar bill out of my pocket #I pull another one dollar bill out of my pocket #this proceeds for the next 3 hours.

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monkey's paw clown nose wish curse funny writing prompt

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I wanna see y'all in the comments come up with your own ideas for wacky wish granting.

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fulgur-caligo-custodis kurlyfryz Power move: Next time you go to the airport, bring a bottle of shampoo, but it's filled with yogurt. When they tell you that liquids aren't allowed Drink it Posted in r/madlads by u/ProbablyM_S reddit

lesbianshepard Jul 24 travelling next week for work. googled the nearest city and none of you are prepared to see what passes for the local style pizza. lesbianshepard Jul 24 this should be a crime lesbianshepard Jul 25 #someone needs to die for this #divorced dad type food #is the local chef a 12 year old latchkey kid? #as a new yorker im about to k J elf #abolish all prisons except one for these guys #that is a crime where I'm from #I'm anti regional food variation shaming but this is a crime man #mamma mia. #i took like a deep shuddering breath #i feel nauseous. #oh no they should be shot #literally the closest thing to anti-Italian racism the reviews are in: Pennsylvania must pay for its crimes

theaccidentfactory Follow I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby theaccidentfactory English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking s about the neighbor's son

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Scrimbly Bimbly and the blatant streamer/youtuber bait FNAF ripoff game

loveletterworm the fact that "hyper-marketable indie horror game aimed at children and youtubers who make videos for children" is like a whole genre now is kinda f----- right like what's up with that loveletterworm Every few months someone makes a game called like Scrimbly Bimbly's Wacky Silly Funhouse where you just kind of walk around a dark room for a bit and theres vaguely spooky writing on the walls like "DONT BELIEVE HIS LIES" and then the main monster of the game looks like this scrimbly ✓ ไ and then within like a week my niece is playing roblox clones of it on her ipad and theres plushies of scrimbly in every gamestop and the devs are on twitter like We';re making a Scrimbly tv show !! And the only person over the age of 7 who has ever thought about their game is the game theory guy because he needs to make a video about how scrimbly connects to the 1962 cuban missile crisis and theres like 80 scrimbly spinoffs that aren't even pretending to be horror games anymore so they're just sort of a normal kid's games with a slightly f----- up looking animal like the concept of "ironic childish imagery in horror game" mutated into "Actually, this is just literally for children, and we are trying to get as much money out of those children as possible"

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Y'know.... I would read that too

nightskybooks teariffic-books Brooding YA Hero @broodingYAhero Jul 31 It's amazing how many prophecies involve teens. You'd think they'd pick more emotionally stable people, with more free time. Like grandmas. dinuriel ...I would read the hell out of a series of a chosen eighty-five-year-old woman who goes on epic journeys throughout a dangerous and magical land, armed only with a cane and her stab-tastic knitting needles, accompanied by her six cats and a sure skittish-yet-devoted orderly who makes she takes her pills on time. Source: thebroodingyahero 67,748 notes A 17 3

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Animal Crossing conversation sounds like two comrades bleeding out on the battlefield

Hmm I might get it And we could be friends in it? That sounds nice shingojira this exchange between me and my sister about animal crossing reads like two comrades bleeding out on the battlefield uglygirlstatus Hmm Yeah might get it K we can be friends Yeah we can be friends You can come to my island Delivered i literally cannot stop thinking about this post AMIR SOUTH That sounds nice. AF%Y And we could be friends in it? You can Come to my island. @goalinfriend

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An octopus would make a great penpal

what-even-is-thiss Follow I wish octopus could learn how to read. They could be pen pals with middle schoolers. what-even-is-thiss Follow Dearest Samantha, I do not know what a guinea pig is, but it sounds delicious. I hope you have fun devouring it, or playing with it, if that is your preference. Today I hacked a local computer to get more bubbles in my tank and took a photograph of an unsuspecting victim. Do let me know how your human activities are going. And if this "Karen" continues to antagonize your brother, I would suggest smacking her very hard. And do send more canned snacks. Best Wishes, Octopus #5, Monterrey bay research aquarium 16,325 notes

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The fault in our school system

REVOL verchameleon THE FAULT IN OUR SCHOOL SYSTEM I did the Social Studies Fair on the American education system but was so pressed for time this is what I ended up turning in. Grade pending... REVOL verchameleon ... Is that we were So overwhelmed with Other School work that we had no time to assemble this board. A 95!!!

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histories...

verdigrisandgrame nobleplaidypus gdfalksen Chiune Sugihara. This man saved 6000 Jews. He was a Japanese diplomat in Lithuania. When the Nazis began rounding up Jews, Sugihara risked his life to start issuing unlawful travel visas to Jews. He hand-wrote them 18 hrs a day. The day his consulate closed and he had to evacuate, witnesses claim he was STILL writing visas and throwing from the train as he pulled away. He saved 6000 lives. The world didn't know what he'd done until Israel honored him in 1985, the year before he died. bemusedlybespectacled Why can't we have a movie about him? robowolves He was often called "Sempo", an alternative reading of the characters of his first name, as that was easier for Westerners to pronounce. Aus His wife, Yukiko, was also a part of this; she is often credited with suggesting the plan. The Sugihara family was held in a Soviet POW camp for 18 months until the end of the war; within a year of returning home, Sugihara was asked to resign - officially due to downsizing, but most likely because the government disagreed with his actions. He didn't simply grant visas - he granted visas against direct orders, after attempting three times to receive permission from the Japanese Foreign Ministry and being turned down each time. He did not "misread" orders; he was in direct violation of them, with the encouragement and support of his wife. He was honoured as Righteous Among the Nations in 1985, a year before he died in Kamakura; he and his descendants have also been granted permanent Israeli citizenship. He was also posthumously awarded the Life Saving Cross of Lithuania (1993); Commander's Cross Order of Merit of the Republic of Poland (1996); and the Commander's Cross with Star of the Order of Polonia Restituta (2007). Though not canonized, some Eastern Orthodox Christians recognize him as a saint. Sugihara was born in Gifu on the first day of 1900, January 1. He achieved top marks in his schooling; his father wanted him to become a physician, but Sugihara wished to pursue learning English. He deliberately failed the exam by writing only his name and then entered Waseda, where he majored in English. He joined the Foreign Ministry after graduation and worked in the Manchurian Foreign Office in Harbin (where he learned Russian and German; he also converted to the Eastern Orthodox Church during this time). He resigned his post in protest over how the Japanese government treated the local Chinese citizens. He eventually married Yukiko Kikuchi, who would suggest and encourage his acts in Lithuania; they had four sons together. Chiune Sugihara passed away July 31, 1986, at the age of 86. Until her own passing in 2008, Yukiko continued as an ambassador of his legacy. It is estimated that the Sugiharas saved between 6,000-10,000 Lithuanian and Polish Jewish people. returnofthejudai It's a tragedy that the Sugiharas aren't household names. They are among the greatest heroes of WWII. Is it because they were from an Axis Power? it because they aren't European? I don't know. But I've decided to always reblog them when they come across my dash. If I had the money, I would finance a movie about them. westsemiteblues He told an interviewer: You want to know about my motivation, don't you? Well. It is the kind of sentiments anyone would have when he actually sees refugees face to face, begging with tears in their eyes. He just cannot help but sympathize with them. Among the refugees were the elderly and women. They were so desperate that they went so far as to kiss my shoes, Yes, I actually witnessed such scenes with my own eyes. Also, I felt at that time, that the Japanese government did not have any uniform opinion in Tokyo. Some Japanese military leaders were just scared because of the pressure from the Nazis; while other officials in the Home Ministry were simply ambivalent. People in Tokyo were not united. I felt it silly to deal with them. So, I made up my mind not to wait for their reply. I knew that somebody would surely complain about me in the future. But, I myself thought this would be the right thing to do. There is nothing wrong in saving many people's lives....The spirit of humanity, philanthropy...neighborly friendship...with this spirit, I ventured to do what I did, confronting this most difficult situation-and because of this reason, I went ahead with redoubled courage. He died in nearly complete obscurity in Japan. His neighbors were shocked when people from all over, including Israeli diplomatic personnel, showed up at quiet little Mr. Sugihara's funeral. Source: gdfalksen #history #important 329,308 notes A

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Pundits🤡

Vor 1St school kids: "man, homework and stupid times and tests and all these issues are really hampering my ability to lea-" political pundits: "THE TRANSES" school kids: "what?" political pundits: "THE TRANSES IN THE SPORTS, THAT WILL DESTROY YOUR ABILITY TO LEARN" school kids: "they found like one in an entire state and there's a pretty strong amount of evidence that it's not cut and dr-" political pundits: "FURRIES" school kids: "what?" political pundits: "NOW THERE'S FURRIES IN SCHOOLS AND TEACHERS ARE BEING FIRED FOR NOT AGREEING" school kids: "that was a hoax" political pundits: "THEY'RE PUTTING LITTERBOXES IN THE-" school kids: "all of these are hoaxes, can we please stop, so that actual issues can be discussed?" political pundits: "forgiving lunch debt would destroy society, because the furry litterbox trannies want to use it to dest-" school kids: "oh my f------ god" 5 Anmerkungen

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Iconic 2014 Tumblr Arctic Monkeys Concert Group Photo

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Rehabilitating Riddler

lennythereviewer In today's modern society, Riddler would be the EASIEST of Batman's villains to rehabilitate All you have to do? Give him a job designing/ running an Escape Room facility It's perfect for him. A non-violent outlet for feeding his need to flex how intelligent he is, he still gets to create his elaborate puzzles and riddles, and people will willingly PAY HIM to lock them up in a room where he can mess with them for an hour or so Someone get Bruce Wayne on the phone I have an idea for a thing he should invest in thenarator if you win, and successfully escape the room, you get a sticker that says "i'm as smart as batman" Source: lennythereviewer 4,104 notes

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A chilly, cold, cruel common connection of these crying cyromancers.

otherwindow Follow character: *has frost powers* me: your backstory is family related trauma isn't it otherwindow Follow

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That's an Unfortunate Last Name

Rodger Sherman @rodger DO THEY HAVE TO MAKE HIM WEAR HIS LAST NAME LIKE THAT A QUENTIN BIGOT 10M BIG 5:12 PM 8/1/21 Twitter Web App hypnoticwinter Follow MEN'S 3000M STEEP GAY 999 slashercatz Follow I FRANCE BIGOT BIGOT PRIDE AND PREJUDICE.

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The Rule 34 People Would Love This

martian-borzoi Follow Sometimes I think the reason they scrapped the original hotel Transylvania dracula design was because they knew that if we got that on the big screen you guys wouldn't be able to handle yourselves. noritaro Follow oh it can't be that ba- M 3,344 notes ㄹㅇ ㅁ

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+87

Tumblr - The Clown's Nose

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

writing-prompt-s Instead of the Monkey's Paw, you find the Clown's Nose, which instead of granting your wish in the worst way possible will grant it in the funniest way. randomitemdrop Follow Item: the Cursed Clown Nose. Obviously to use it you have to put it on and give it a honk bluehairedspidey Follow tiawesomeness 4h ago bluehairedspidey #Wow this really works! #*honks nose* I want a million dollars #I pull a one dollar bill out of my pocket #I pull another one dollar bill out of my pocket #this proceeds for the next 3 hours.

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Nitpicker

Nitpicker

Apr 17, 2023 at 12:04AM EDT

>I wanna live forever
>get old
>get a heart attack while crossing the street and die standing up
>get hit by a car, compressing your chest just enough to restart your heart
>oh fuck

+34

Kommando_Kaijin

Kommando_Kaijin

Apr 16, 2023 at 09:30PM EDT

I don't even have to guess as to what'll happen when someone inevitably tries to use it to get a gf.

+32

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I wanna see y'all in the comments come up with your own ideas for wacky wish granting.

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