-I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. - Four ruffians break into my house. - "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. - Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man. He's dead on the spot. - Draw my pistol on the second man. Misses him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbor's dog. - I have to resort to the cannon at the top of the stairs loaded with grapeshot. - "Tally ho, lads." The grapeshot shreds two men in the blast. The sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. - Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. - He bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are difficult to stitch-up. -Just as the founding fathers intended. Tally ho, retards

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I love playing this game about this silly looking cat CASTLEY CAT 3 THE VEGAS CONNECTION START GAME A MAUSLAND GAME BY WIESI & DER SPANIER I sure hope nothing wacky happens when I run out of hearts

It was a rigged order, I tell you. The biggest McDonald's rig the Demma Rats ever pulled. That's why it's called a "Rigger". I think it rhymes with... M M 20 22 20 22 Just put the fries in-the-bag, man. #forRMHC

I sure love being a literal 4 year old in pre K. Surely nothing strange will happen. Huh? Are you dense, ya little s---? I'm you from the future. Now listen to me carefully. Who are you?! YOU NEED TO INVEST IN NVIDIA STOCK!!! ALSO INVEST IN SEP 500 STOCK!!! IT MIGHT CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!! (Guy who just learned about the Stock Market yesterday) WAAAHHHH!!! WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME!!?!?!

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Your honour, my client would like to submit a counter claim. It is correct that the plaintiff received a surprise toe sucking while staying at my client's hotel. This is a service which costs extra and my client has yet to receive payment.

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You know, Cal and Merrin are one of the good romances in Star Wars That isn't incestuous OBO or full of red flags If anything tragic were to happen to them in the third game that rips them apart... I would kill everyone in the writers room, including myself. (Solidarity for the Writers Strike, in all seriousness) X

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Ironic Doge Memes - Le American has arrived | /r/dogelore

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

-I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. - Four ruffians break into my house. - "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. - Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man. He's dead on the spot. - Draw my pistol on the second man. Misses him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbor's dog. - I have to resort to the cannon at the top of the stairs loaded with grapeshot. - "Tally ho, lads." The grapeshot shreds two men in the blast. The sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. - Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. - He bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are difficult to stitch-up. -Just as the founding fathers intended. Tally ho, retards

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