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I was tanking, in a rather nasty fight, and just before he can heal me, our healer gets knocked out. Not my day. So knowing the campaign is almost over, and it'll be worth their wrath, I dive into the last baddies. In an o--- of mutual bloodletting, me and last enemies die. DM: (ooc) well that was special. (IC) Anyway, what do you do now? Rogue: loot the bodies of course Cleric: (ooc) uh... Crap, I'm too low a level to resurrect you Sorcerer: (ooc) that's right, you're dead too. (To DM)I loot his body Rogue: me too! DM divides up the tanks items, then looks at me... Me: so confession time, I'm not a tank. Confused looks from the other players. Me: who picked up my sword? Rogue: you didn't.... (Looks at DM) you let him? DM evil grins: sorcerer make a will save. Sorcerer: why? He's dead. Me: that's what you think... I'm not the body, I'm the sword. Barbarian: Hey, if you want, I can take it off your hands. Barbarian with a... APORT ...Haversack of Holding filled with cursed items

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CHIRP. R R R CHIRP. HOW CAN WE EVER REPAY YOU, EARLY BIRD? EPISODE DCCCLII ©2018-2024 ~MATTHEW J WILLS ~ MATTHEW J WILLS ~ ALL RIGHTS RESERVED とと @SWORDSCOMIC

YOU SHOOT YOUR MONKS TO MAKE THEM FEEL COOL BY DEFLECTING IT I SHOOT MY MONKS CAUSE I FORGOT THEY CAN DO THAT WE ARE NOT THE SAME

imgflip.com As he was running late to D&D, Fred had a sudden premonition that the party had started without him and somehow angered a god.

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Bruh... my guts... | /r/dndmemes

I run a D&D game for 20-year olds, and yesterday a new player introduced his character by saying he was "old but not very old, like between middle-aged and elderly... maybe 40, something like that?" Anyway that's when a dozen dragons attacked the party. Me, the DM at 53...

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I let my players loosely know the theme of a game... not the exact details of the setting. | /r/dndmemes

DM: We open our first session on the deck of a pirate ship. The water is so clear you can see all the way to the bottom. *shows the group a picture to set the scene* Player: Hey, wait sec... DM: Are you ready kids? Player: I thought we were going to play a gritty, horror campaign with vampires and ghosts. DM: I can't hear you! Player: I said, I thought we... DM: *at the top of his voice* OHHHHHHH!!!

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It's all fun and games until... | /r/dndmemes

leftboob-enthusiast Like no offense to my friends and family but if I had the chance to abandon this timeline for a medieval fantasy land I would absolutely do it, goodbye student loans and depression hello cool magic s--- and most likely an early death by the sword (as it should be) You will? mens-rights-activia Have fun s------- in outhouses and losing loved ones to the plague™ the-goblin-cat medieval fantasy, not actual medieval times you impudent fool firelordderpy Have fun crapping in outhouses and losing loved ones to the Goblin Raiders™ the-goblin-cat That's more the f--- like it

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This list seems a bit sus... | /r/dndmemes

The Rotund Turkey Dungeon Master @BigSquishyDM What the #DND races sound like Dwarf: transatlantic Elf: swedish Human: Texan Half Elf: Minnesotan Halflings: Canadian Gnomes: Monty Python French Knights Dragon Born: Cockney Teiflings: Castilian Warforged: Beep Boop Firbolg: Chicago Lizard People: Brooklyn Kenku: *birb noises* Tortle: Mexican SQUIRTLE, SQUIRTLE, SQUIRTLE... ...CABRON!

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Something that never, never, never might not happen... | /r/dndmemes

Oh, of course I'll play in your D&D game! But I didn't even ask you. Of course I'd roleplay seduction! Oh, ok. Be at my place at 6. - Ruan Kramer

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Enlargement, it's not for everybody... | /r/dndmemes

← r/DnD Joined u/zoctopode 1h [OC][Art] Never cast enlarge on your gnome 36 y/o gnome artificer (very tiny) COND ENLARGE 2nd level transmutation OH MY GOD. HE DOES LOOK KINDA DIFFERENT... HAIRCUT, MAYBE...? ( NEW SHOES?.. oh my ARE YOU SEEING THIS? ARE YOU WELL?

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GibusLlama | /r/dndmemes

GibusLlama 3:21 AM I come again with a meme, hopefully this isn't pushing the approval bar too far Me before the protest Wholesome DnD memes Me after the protest Degeneracy Y'll got anymore of those NSFW links?

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Yep... everytime. | /r/dndmemes

sufficientlylargen My understanding of D&D is that the GM has the power to make the next quest a heist, but the players control whether the background music for this heist will be the Pink Panther theme, the Mission Impossible theme, or the Benny Hill theme. athenasdragon #it is also my understanding that the players do not have *conscious* control of this #and that they will also end up choosing the Benny Hill theme no matter what they do #D&D That's it, that's the game!

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To good not to steal and post here... | /r/dndmemes

PC: I THINK SO DM: HAVE YOU FINISHED YOUR TURN? BLOCK PC: I DON'T HAVE ANY BONUS ACTIONS --- PC:I HATE THAT GUY imgflip.com DM: WHAT ABOUT YOUR BONUS ACTION? BLOG DM: HEALING WORD IS A BONUS ACTION YOU KNOW CK DM: WHITELEAF THE WIZARD IS ABOUT TO DIE

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So... you're saying it can't work? | /r/dndmemes

The "target" of an area-of-effect spell is its point of origin. A typical spell requires you to pick one or more targets to be affected by the spell's magic. A spell's description tells you whether the spell targets creatures, objects.or a point of origin for an area of effect (described below). PHB 204 For a spell like magic missile, the target is a creature. For a spell like fireball, the target is the point in space where the ball of fire erupts. A spell's "point of origin" can be an entire creature. position its point of origin. Typically, a point of origin is a point in space, but some spells have an area whose origin is a creature or an object. PHB 204 For cone spells whose range is "Self", you are the point of origin. Spells that create cones or lines of effect that originate from you also have a range of self, indicating that the origin point of the spell's effect must be you (see "Areas of Effect" later in the this chapter). (This doesn't mean you're hitting yourself.) A cone's point of origin is not included in the cone's area of effect, unless you decide otherwise. Cone of Cold is such a spell. CONE OF COLD 5th-level evocation Casting Time: 1 action Range: Self (60-foot cone) PHB 202 Components: V, S, M (a small crystal or glass cone) Duration: Instantaneous. PHB 204 A blast of cold air erupts from your hands. Each creature in a 60-foot cone must make a Constitution. saving throw. A creature takes 8d8 cold damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one. A creature killed by this spell becomes a frozen statue until it thaws. PHB 202 you to fight as a seamless unit. While mounted on your steed. you can make any spell you cast that targets only you also target your steed. PHB 224 Therefore, you are Cone of Cold's only target. Find Steed lets you summon a magical intelligent telepathic horse. You can then make the spells that target only you also target your horse. PHB 240 Therefore, you can make your Cone of Cold also target your horse, i.e. your horse also becomes the point of origin of a cone that deals 8d8 cold damage. Therefore, U

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It's called forgotten for a reason... | /r/dndmemes

The Bard and Necromancer just innocently mingling at a local tavern... Ne RIN Ed Greenwood: "What happens in the Forgotten Realms stays in the Forgotten Realms." WARDRING THE CARD CAME

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Get it, smelt. I’ll see myself out. | /r/dndmemes

Ugh. What's that smell? You know what we say, whoever smelt it, dealt it. Did you just make a f@&kin mining pun? JNF

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Dungeons and Dragons - Yo, lemme get in on that... | /r/dndmemes

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I was tanking, in a rather nasty fight, and just before he can heal me, our healer gets knocked out. Not my day. So knowing the campaign is almost over, and it'll be worth their wrath, I dive into the last baddies. In an o--- of mutual bloodletting, me and last enemies die. DM: (ooc) well that was special. (IC) Anyway, what do you do now? Rogue: loot the bodies of course Cleric: (ooc) uh... Crap, I'm too low a level to resurrect you Sorcerer: (ooc) that's right, you're dead too. (To DM)I loot his body Rogue: me too! DM divides up the tanks items, then looks at me... Me: so confession time, I'm not a tank. Confused looks from the other players. Me: who picked up my sword? Rogue: you didn't.... (Looks at DM) you let him? DM evil grins: sorcerer make a will save. Sorcerer: why? He's dead. Me: that's what you think... I'm not the body, I'm the sword. Barbarian: Hey, if you want, I can take it off your hands. Barbarian with a... APORT ...Haversack of Holding filled with cursed items

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