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Back to school mires Anonymous 08/22/23(Tue)22:42:26 No.72022261 [Reply] >be me >walking to class on first day back to campus >cute girl smiles at me while walking past >another cute girl sits next to me in class >we start talking and she's already telling me that she hopes me and her are research paper partners >we talk after class and she accidentally almost says that she has a boyfriend but then quickly corrects herself and says he's just a friend >mfw Is this what making it feels like bros?

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon embraces the femboy path | /r/Greentext

Anonymous The most attractive masculine (...) 08/22/23(Tue)15:08:15 No.904804319 This really makes you think about our society's choices. Why go for rugged masculinity when you could have the best of both worlds with femboys? We've evolved beyond our primal instincts and the wild. We're part of a structured society and civilization now. We don't need those massive molars and chunky toes for survival in open fields. Instead, imagine enjoying adorable dates all day - now that would be amazing. 218 KB JPG Listen here bitches, I am the reverse incel! So Rather than fixating on the ultra-macho persona, I'm all for embracing a more feminine identity. I want to exude cuteness, maintain a youthful appearance, and rock a cute dress anytime, anywhere. So f--- Andrew tate. I wanna be pegged down by a black lipstick mommy dom goth girl NOW! This is Neoteny supremacy! The final form of human evolution!

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Anon is a zoomer coomer. | /r/Greentext

File: Sweat.png (13 KB, 360x378) they f----- up. Anonymous 08/11/23(Fri)21:33:11 No.74353149 >Be me, 20 year old Zoomer >See an old p---- DVD from the early 2000s >Two white people, a man and a woman, having fully consensual sex on a soft bed. >Neither has animal features >They aren't related >Neither is crying >Not a tentacle in sight >There's no feces or urine >Start having an existential crisis, feel like I'm being posessed >Run to my computer >Shove cheese grater up my ass and j------- to video of a tentacle monster r----- a trans gorilla's bussy while a quadriplegic Batman jizzes on its face and a hamster girl tells me nobody will ever love me. >Snap back to reality Man... Millennials and Gen X were into some really weird s---... We need to fix the world

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chemist anon makes too much quaaludes | /r/Greentext

N. O Anonymous 08/22/23(Tue)18:49:49 No.904806419 [Reply] >be me, chemistry hobbyist >decide to try to make quaaludes >expecting s--- yields, so give no s---- about getting addicted >end up making wayy more than anticipated >now I have a huge stockpile of quaalude and am rapidly succumbing to addiction >no one wants to buy it, don't want to flush it because its special Did I f----- myself?

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anon can't take it any more | /r/Greentext

Mom found the storage No. 19036609 08/22/23(Tue)14:43:00 FuckingKillMe.jpg 23 KB 360x360 >be me, 26 >live alone >furiously slapping my meatloaf >spill my yoghurt on average 4 times a day >usually use a sock, shirt, shoe etc, and when it's filled and/or smells too bad, i store it in my closet >have used the same sock a few weeks now >ThickCrust.exe >ffw to today >mom comes by at work to return my key, she was over at my place to put back a spare mattress she borrowed due to visitors etc "btw anon, i thought i could help you out a little with laundry, so i looked into your closet.. and.. i found something... disturbing.. >InternalScreaming.mp3 >starts sweating and shaking >she hands me 1000 dollars, straight face "please buy new clothes and use tissues or the sink in the future, honey, i threw everything in the bin" This is definently a new low for me :) Can i pretend like this never happend? 0 replies, 0 images

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Anons in his mid 30s | /r/Greentext

File: humor-tv-parks-recreation-screensho(...).jpg (33 KB, 600x334) LandDiruse you Ling] O /r9k/ Anonymous 08/22/23(Tue)04:58:25 No.74470989 [Reply] >be me >Mid 30s >Head to the gun range with my father & brother last weekend to shoot sporting clays >I'm the oldest child but have very little in common with my brother & father >Cept shootan. I'm a pretty good shot and we've been out hunting as a family for the last decade. >Lil bro does the best, but he's a crack shot so no surprise. >Dad doesn't shoot as good as usual. Movements are stiff & he has difficulty tracking the faster/harder clays >Soundly beat my father for the first time >Feel pretty good about it. Up until we are heading back to a rest area and he has to stop & rest because he can't keep up with brother & I. >Reality sets in, realize I don't have as much time as I thought >Mfw it hits hard I've always wanted to win but not like this. Anonymous 08/22/23(Tue)06:00:21 No.74471553 Decent greentext

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Anons a combat medic | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 08/22/23(Tue)10:26:26 No.25736845 File: 1679839254983096.gif (339 KB, 220x208) >>25725826 I'll tell you what... Small greentext >Be me >.milfag >68W Combat medic >Deployed to Iraq >I have one job: Train Police >They're f------ muslims >Easily some of the dumbest m------------ on the planet >They scream that they hate gays >Throw them off roofs >They laugh when they talk about that s--- >Not that I disagree with rooftop f------, but the rest are f------ too >We catch them constantly balls deep in each other >Like anytime they got a moment alone, they're f------ >Superstitious as f--- too >ABSOLUTELY believe they can get turned into frogs or other undesirable animals >One day on training patrol in green zone >Run into crazy old lady screeching >Normally they would just beat her ass and be done with it >This bitch is screaming that she is gonna turn them into pigs or dogs or some s--- >She has unlocked their most primal fear >These greasy Muslim f------ for all the bravado, are pants shittingly terrified of this woman >Normally they would just beat her ass and send her on her way >Not this time >Engage: Halal Snackbar!!! (I know what they're saying before some Eurofaggot tries to correct me) >One of the trainees is screaming at her with his gun pointed like she has her hand on a nuke >Yelling about "Don't do it!" >She is threatening to turn one of the trainees into a dog and points at him >Woman turns and runs away >At this point, I'm mouth agape, dumbfounded. >Trainees breath sigh of relief, all are accounted for, no new dogs around >They literally counted to make sure >One guy says that if he ever gets turned into a pig or dog, to shoot him. >Tell them that they can't get turned into a dog or pig like I tell a 3 year old >They don't believe me and talk about people they knew who did. >Inshallah indeed...

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Anon talks to a coworker | /r/Greentext

image.jpg 58 KB JPG 352 >work with a fat girl >she's worried about getting diabetes >says her parents both have it >ask what kind and she says Type 2 >tell her I can help her lose weight if she wants >she tells me that doesn't matter and she'll get it anyway because weight doesn't cause diabetes >proceeds to snack on a 2lb bag of skittl- I mean genetics on her desk every damn day >mfw

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Anon does not care for climate change activists very much | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/10/23(Sat)23:00:01 No.186204755 images (7).jpg 27 KB JPG >AHHHHH THE WORLD IS GOING TO BE 0.1 DEGREE WARMER IN THE NEXT 50 YEARS AHHH WHY WON'T ANYONE DO ANYTHING TO STOP IT >*Climbs into one of his sixteen SUVS* >AHHH THE HECKIN' ENVIRONMENT IS BEING DESTROYED BY RICH CEOS AHHH >*boards private jet* >SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING, WHY WON'T ANYONE LISTEN??? WE HAVE TO SAVE THE EARTH!!! >*lands on the runway at his private island. Enters his sixth vacation home, all 17 rooms pre cooled to his exact specifications* >I'M GOING INSAAAAAANE >*heads to the beach to board his yacht*

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Anon lives in Minnesota | /r/Greentext

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Anon is a doctor...... | /r/Greentext

>be me >surgeon >35 hour operation >do it perfectly with no mistakes everyone thanks god

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Top fucking kek | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 136 KB JPG 02/13/22(Sun)19:52:58 No.163841156 >2022 >no more gay joke, fat joke, black people joke 02/13/22(Sun)19:54:27 No.163841195 : Anonymous >A gay, a fat, and a black walks into a bar >the bartender turns and says "Hi, OP!" >>163841371 # >>163841815 # >>163842163 # >>163842333 # >>163842466 # >>163844282 # >>163844378 # >>163844533 # >>163844832 # >>163845190 #

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Anon is an alien | /r/Greentext

File: aliens-dancing.gif (1.32 MB, 220x147) https://is2.4chan.org/x/1692688468344205.gif I am an Alien Ayylmao !!FTlcqHEGWXh 08/22/23(Tue)09:14:28 No.35679798 [Reply] >>35680065 >>35680070 >>35680094 I will answer your questions if I can. I'm not so knowledgeable about everything relating to us but I will try my best to answer your questions 10 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view. Ayylmao !!FTlcqHEGWXh 08/22/23(Tue)09:36:44 No.35679932 >>35679887 >What is your number? No idea >What is the name of your ship? No Idea >What is your position/function on the ship? Tourist/Immigrant >What is your species? Currently Human, I don't recall my previous species but I was brought to earth by something like those Greys >What is your faction's agenda? To live among Humans or as a Human >so is it true you can't teleport you just create localized wormholes and go through them so fast in your space ships that it doesn't close up on you or was that a lie from nobody in particular and you can really teleport and can you give me the math for making wormholes and why it doesn't stablize easy? uhh, I don't know >>35679915 >>35679924

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Greentext Stories - Anon talks to a cute girl | /r/Greentext

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Back to school mires Anonymous 08/22/23(Tue)22:42:26 No.72022261 [Reply] >be me >walking to class on first day back to campus >cute girl smiles at me while walking past >another cute girl sits next to me in class >we start talking and she's already telling me that she hopes me and her are research paper partners >we talk after class and she accidentally almost says that she has a boyfriend but then quickly corrects herself and says he's just a friend >mfw Is this what making it feels like bros?

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