< 8 Dad > Text Message Today 13:16 Just fostered a dog FR

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Kieran Healy @kjhealy@mastodon.social A late dinner-prepared on time but neglected in favor of a computer game-led my son to be victimized by the remark "Those who forget the pasta are condemned to reheat it". Honestly I'm surprised he hasn't simply smothered me in my sleep by now. Mar 05, 2024, 04:35 - Ivory for iOS 8 - ★ 19

DocAtCDI @DocAtCDI@mastodon.social It's inappropriate to make a dad joke if you're not a dad. It's a faux pa. Jan 15, 2024, 06:32 - DocAtCDI 85-★ 167

Pun Hub There's only one thing that scares me about Halloween. IG: @PunHubOnline Exactly. Which is? ●00

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Dun dun dun

Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes . Follow My last girlfriend said I was unnecessarily mysterious. Or did she? 6:20 PM Aug 17, 2023 410 Reply ↑ Share Read 1 reply X

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Oof

I asked my wife if I was the only one she'd been with. She said yes, all the others had been nines and tens.

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Planes

asked my wife to get me some plain work socks... FxV I love her even more now!

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Warming

Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes. Follow My friends got a new house, and I paid for them to get underfloor heating... ...it was a house warming gift. 8:55 AM Aug 19, 2023 676 Reply ↑ Share Read 1 reply X ℗

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Apologies

X Did you hear that NASA is about to launch a new mission to say sorry to aliens for Earth polluting space? Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes . Follow It's called Apollo G. 8:56 AM Aug 19, 2023 1.6K . Reply ↑ Share Read 6 replies

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Ha

Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes . Follow I had a friend who could only do things spontaneously. We called him Oliver sudden. 8:15 AM. Aug 20, 2023 682 Reply ↑ Share Read 7 replies X 8

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That Works

Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes. Follow Whenever my wife is upset, I let her color in my tattoos. She just needs a shoulder to crayon. 8:17 AM Aug 20, 2023 878 . Reply ↑ Share Read 6 replies X

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Easy

HOW TO WRITE "HELLO" IN MANDARIN DU CHINESE

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Gosh

Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes . Follow "Your underwear is much too tight and very revealing," I said to my wife. She replied, "Wear your own then." 2:05 PM. Aug 20, 2023 1K Reply ↑ Share Read 4 replies X

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Ugh

Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes . Follow My wife told me to put ketchup on the grocery list. So I did. But now I can't read the grocery list. 9:25 AM. Aug 21, 2023 1.2K Reply Share X Read 9 replies i

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dad of the year | /r/wholesomememes

r/AskReddit u/ScottishTwink 10h 11 NSFW Straight men ...if you had a son and he told you he was gay ...how would you honestly react and what would be your first line of words to him? 186 BEST COMMENTS gmedi 10h . 3 Awards Hi Gay, I'm Dad 949 : T SL Share Reply Award 1.3k

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Dad's hate this one trick

Dads when their kids say "I feel hungry" instead of "I'm hungry": @officialdarkhumor made with mematic

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Dad Jokes - Got em

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< 8 Dad > Text Message Today 13:16 Just fostered a dog FR

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Uploaded Aug 24, 2023 at 09:37AM EDT

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