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I'd be sad because there is no post above me.

Forever alone.

If I was married to Suiseiseki, our kids first words would be in Japanese.

Desu.

If I was married to Natsuru,
I'd…
actually, I don't know.

I'd probably wake up in a dirty motel bathroom with one kidney missing.
JK.

Okay, nooooow I know what would happen.
Rape.
Lot's of rape.

And you still end up in a dirty motel bathroom with one kidney missing.

GOD DAMN'T

Our marriage, everything. It was…

So I'm raped by my husband
Then I wake up with a missing Kidney.
The lesson here:
Never use Craigslist for relationships

Correction:
Never use KnowYourMeme for relationships.

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What am I supposed to do with a bottle of urine?

Guess.

oh god.

Can I marry someone else?
Please, some one who see's this.
Help me out.

^Hey baby

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Die Doritos!

Nailed it!

GODDANGIT YOU CRUSHED THEM ALL.
just have to settle for a triforce.
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If I was married to Jarateisurine, I wouled have to drink piss that wasn't my own!

If I was married to Natsuru….

I woke up next to a RussianFedora… I got a hat to wear today!
I marry the hat and live a long hatfull life.
Until one fateful day…
A gust of wind takes my beloved, right over the bridge I was crossing, never to be seen again, I nearly fall over trying to reach in reaction.
I wake up the next day, >Next Post< has suddenly married me.

I've gone out with some friends. Drinking and everything, we had fun.
Later that night I start to drink a little much.
My friends decide to take me home, since I've got really drunk.
We walk over the bridge, heading to my home.
I see some douch on the other end, tightly hugging a fedora.
Everything becomes black after that.

I wake up the next day in a strange bed.
Awful headache and a ring on my finger.
I look next to me and think to myself: "Oh shit."

MY carrot.

I've seen enough KYM to know where this is goi-wait, no I don't.

Lets see if somebody wants to be married to me…

Btw, i would never marry a random man

If I would ma- Oh, never mind.

That's just my name. I'm actually a Russian wearing a Fedora.
 
If I was married to RandomMan….

God, how many times have we been married?