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*sigh* No one understands me anymore.

Last posted Feb 04, 2015 at 09:59PM EST. Added Feb 01, 2015 at 08:16PM EST
43 posts from 18 users

I have lost my way with this place. We all shitpost and laugh but never get anywhere in life. Ever since the thread sim was canceled and we all shrugged it off I just thought how worthless we actually are. We're in a world of shit and act like its normal, some of you may call this a "shitpost" but its the truth. I just feel like everything won't end ever. We just go on and on and on on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and never stop. When will it end? What is this? Is this a universe?

Its just like…. well the irc is always kill because of me , no one takes me seriously, no one actually helps me when i say i have necrophilia, we just laugh it off. i mean I FEEL LIKE WERE ALL BIPOLAR OR CHANGING RAPIDLY CAUSE WE JUST GET SO MAD AT EACH OTHER.

TL;DR If we could just stop and think about pasta:

Or Elton John

Or the possibility that giant squid are evil:

Our lives would just be better.
AMEN.

One day while Andy was masturbating, Woody got wood. He could no longer help himself! He watched as Andy stroked his juicy kawaii cock. He approached Andy which startled him and make him pee everywhere on the floor and on Woody too. Being drenched in his urine made him harder than ever! Woody: "Andy Senpai! I'm alive and I want to be INSIDE OF YOU." Andy: "Oh Woody Chan! I always knew you were alive! I want to stuff you up my kawaii ass!" Woody grabbed a bunch of flavored live and rubbed it all over is head Woody: "Oh my! It's cherry flavored lube! Cherry is my favorite! Woody then stuffed his head up into Andy's tight ass! The other toys around the room watched intently as Woody shoved his head back and forth into Andy's nice ass, continuously making a squishy wet noise. The other toys also became aroused and they all gathered around Woody and Andy and started to urinate all over them, and then they started to masturbate. Andy: "Oh my goodness, Woody Chan! You are churning my insides up so well! Your nose is stimulating my prostate! OH YES! All the other toys became so aroused by this, that they could not help themselves anymore! They pushed Woody completely inside, and they all went inside. All of them wanted to be inside Andy's nice round ass. Andy: "No wait guys! My ass cannot hold this much! I'm getting so full! All the toys went inside of poor squirming Andy and pretty much, he was beyond full, and died from having his insides completely damaged. The mother came inside and found Andy, dead with a huge ass hemorrhage on his anus, with a HUGE belly full of toys.

No Original Names wrote:

I have lost my way with this place. We all shitpost and laugh but never get anywhere in life. Ever since the thread sim was canceled and we all shrugged it off I just thought how worthless we actually are. We're in a world of shit and act like its normal, some of you may call this a "shitpost" but its the truth. I just feel like everything won't end ever. We just go on and on and on on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and never stop. When will it end? What is this? Is this a universe?

Its just like…. well the irc is always kill because of me , no one takes me seriously, no one actually helps me when i say i have necrophilia, we just laugh it off. i mean I FEEL LIKE WERE ALL BIPOLAR OR CHANGING RAPIDLY CAUSE WE JUST GET SO MAD AT EACH OTHER.

TL;DR If we could just stop and think about pasta:

Or Elton John

Or the possibility that giant squid are evil:

Our lives would just be better.
AMEN.

That's racist against giant squids, you assfuck.

Ranch dressing is a type of salad dressing made of some combination of buttermilk, salt, garlic, onion, herbs (commonly chives, parsley, and dill), and spices (commonly black pepper, paprika, and ground mustard seed), mixed into a sauce. Sour cream and yogurt are sometimes used as a substitute by some home cooks or to create a lower-fat version. Ranch dressing has been the best-selling salad dressing in the United States since 1992, when it overtook Italian dressing.[1] It is also popular as a dip.

In the early 1950s, Steve Henson developed what is now known as ranch dressing while working as a plumbing contractor for three years in the remote Alaskan bush. In 1954, he and his wife Gayle opened Hidden Valley Ranch, a dude ranch near Santa Barbara, California, where they served it to the guests. It became popular, and they began selling it in packages for guests to take home, both as a finished product and as packets of seasoning to be mixed with mayonnaise and buttermilk. They incorporated Hidden Valley Ranch Food Products, Inc. and opened a factory to manufacture it in larger volumes, distributed first to supermarkets in the Southwest, and later nationally. In October 1972, the Hidden Valley Ranch brand was bought by Clorox for $8 million.[1]

Kraft Foods and General Foods began selling similar dry seasoning packets labeled as "ranch style". This resulted in a trademark infringement lawsuit against both from the Waples-Platter Companies, the Texas-based manufacturer of Ranch Style Beans (now part of ConAgra Foods), even though Waples-Platter had declined to enter the salad dressing market itself out of fear that the tendency of such products to spoil rapidly would damage its brand. The case was tried before federal judge Eldon Brooks Mahon in Fort Worth, Texas in 1976. Judge Mahon ruled in favor of Waples-Platter in a lengthy opinion which described the various "ranch style" and "ranch" products then available, of which many had been created to compete against Hidden Valley Ranch.[2] Judge Mahon specifically noted that Hidden Valley Ranch and Waples-Platter had no dispute with each other (though he also noted that Hidden Valley Ranch was simultaneously suing General Foods in a separate federal case in California). The only issue before the Texas federal district court was that Waples-Platter was disputing the right of other manufacturers to compete against Hidden Valley Ranch by using the label "ranch style".

Meanwhile, Clorox reformulated the Hidden Valley Ranch dressing several times to try to make it more convenient for consumers. The first change was to include buttermilk flavoring in the seasoning so that it required adding standard milk rather than buttermilk.[1] In 1983, Clorox developed a more popular non-refrigerated bottled formulation. As of 2002, Clorox subsidiary Hidden Valley Ranch Manufacturing LLC produces ranch packets and bottled dressings at two large factories, in Reno, Nevada and Wheeling, Illinois.[3]

During the 1980s, ranch became a common snack food flavor, starting with Cool Ranch Doritos in 1987, and Hidden Valley Ranch Wavy Lay's in 1994.[1]

During the 1990s Hidden Valley had three kid-oriented variations of ranch dressing: pizza, nacho cheese and taco flavors.

Ranch dressing is common in the United States as a dip for vegetables such as broccoli and carrots, as well as for chips and "bar foods" such as french fries and chicken wings. It is also a common dipping sauce for fried foods such as fried mushrooms, fried zucchini, jalapeno poppers, onion rings, chicken fingers, and hushpuppies. In addition, ranch dressing is used on pizza, pickles, baked potatoes, wraps, tacos, pretzels, and hamburgers.

While popular in the United States and Canada, ranch dressing is virtually unknown in many parts of the world.[4][5][6] In places where ranch seasoning is used to flavor snack foods, the flavor may be described as "American" flavor.[citation needed]

Ranch dressing is produced by many manufacturers, including Hidden Valley, Ken's, Kraft, Marie's, Newman's Own, and Wish-Bone.[7]

James Blunt wrote:

One day while Andy was masturbating, Woody got wood. He could no longer help himself! He watched as Andy stroked his juicy kawaii cock. He approached Andy which startled him and make him pee everywhere on the floor and on Woody too. Being drenched in his urine made him harder than ever! Woody: "Andy Senpai! I'm alive and I want to be INSIDE OF YOU." Andy: "Oh Woody Chan! I always knew you were alive! I want to stuff you up my kawaii ass!" Woody grabbed a bunch of flavored live and rubbed it all over is head Woody: "Oh my! It's cherry flavored lube! Cherry is my favorite! Woody then stuffed his head up into Andy's tight ass! The other toys around the room watched intently as Woody shoved his head back and forth into Andy's nice ass, continuously making a squishy wet noise. The other toys also became aroused and they all gathered around Woody and Andy and started to urinate all over them, and then they started to masturbate. Andy: "Oh my goodness, Woody Chan! You are churning my insides up so well! Your nose is stimulating my prostate! OH YES! All the other toys became so aroused by this, that they could not help themselves anymore! They pushed Woody completely inside, and they all went inside. All of them wanted to be inside Andy's nice round ass. Andy: "No wait guys! My ass cannot hold this much! I'm getting so full! All the toys went inside of poor squirming Andy and pretty much, he was beyond full, and died from having his insides completely damaged. The mother came inside and found Andy, dead with a huge ass hemorrhage on his anus, with a HUGE belly full of toys.

Beautiful…

No Original Names wrote:

I have lost my way with this place. We all shitpost and laugh but never get anywhere in life. Ever since the thread sim was canceled and we all shrugged it off I just thought how worthless we actually are. We're in a world of shit and act like its normal, some of you may call this a "shitpost" but its the truth. I just feel like everything won't end ever. We just go on and on and on on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and never stop. When will it end? What is this? Is this a universe?

Its just like…. well the irc is always kill because of me , no one takes me seriously, no one actually helps me when i say i have necrophilia, we just laugh it off. i mean I FEEL LIKE WERE ALL BIPOLAR OR CHANGING RAPIDLY CAUSE WE JUST GET SO MAD AT EACH OTHER.

TL;DR If we could just stop and think about pasta:

Or Elton John

Or the possibility that giant squid are evil:

Our lives would just be better.
AMEN.

…. Wait a second….
"I FEEL LIKE WERE ALL BIPOLAR"

"WERE ALL BIPOLAR"

"BIPOLAR"

Is that a bipolar joke?

Do you even know bipolar bro? euo

TRIGGERED

itt we reflect on how the riff-raff creativity capacity is so low we're now resorting to copy/pasting erotic toy story fanfics and wikipedia articles about food

Last edited Feb 01, 2015 at 09:38PM EST

Muffinlicious wrote:

itt we reflect on how the riff-raff creativity capacity is so low we're now resorting to copy/pasting erotic toy story fanfics and wikipedia articles about food

Last year we were making every single Slime Cap post into a copypasta. I don't see how this is much worse.

Muffinlicious wrote:

itt we reflect on how the riff-raff creativity capacity is so low we're now resorting to copy/pasting erotic toy story fanfics and wikipedia articles about food

itt: mods come to place the usual "No Fun Allowed" sign

Muffinlicious wrote:

itt we reflect on how the riff-raff creativity capacity is so low we're now resorting to copy/pasting erotic toy story fanfics and wikipedia articles about food

Hey, deciding to copy/paste mind-scarring smut fanfics takes some amount of creative effort.

Cecaelia Girlie wrote:

Hey, deciding to copy/paste mind-scarring smut fanfics takes some amount of creative effort.

yes.

ill have you know it took me 10 minutes to find that fanfic

i could have increased my porn folder with hot furries in those 10 minutes

James Blunt wrote:

yes.

ill have you know it took me 10 minutes to find that fanfic

i could have increased my porn folder with hot furries in those 10 minutes

that means you were searching that one specifically?

Dr. MEDIC! wrote:

that means you were searching that one specifically?

i had a faint memory of reading that one.

it was the worst toy story fanfic i read so i had to find it

Last edited Feb 01, 2015 at 10:23PM EST

James Blunt wrote:

i had a faint memory of reading that one.

it was the worst toy story fanfic i read so i had to find it

It's still not worse than the Sonic urinals.

Nothing humanity ever produces will be worse than the Sonic urinals.

Dr. MEDIC! wrote:

Oh
I must read that!

It's fanart, not fanfic, although since it's disgusting, low-quality fetish material it's pretty similar in nature.

Please, PLEASE do not look it up! Do it for the sake of your sanity, if nothing else!

James Blunt wrote:

i desperately need to watch/read the sonic porn about them being urinals – DR.Medic 2015

that sounds like the experience of a life time, who wouldn't want to do that

He just has a bad case of morbid curiosity.

I can relate….

It's why I've decided not to read about shock images any more. THE TEMPTATION IS TOO STRONG.

Why the hell is I can relate so small

Last edited Feb 01, 2015 at 11:31PM EST

Muffinlicious wrote:

itt we reflect on how the riff-raff creativity capacity is so low we're now resorting to copy/pasting erotic toy story fanfics and wikipedia articles about food

itt we reflect on the better threads muffinlicious has made and list them:

  1.  

I'd say this thread disappointed me when I saw the title until I saw Twisty say "that was the worst toy story fanfiction I've ever read."
That implies several things, mate, none of them good.

RandomMan wrote:

itt we reflect on the better threads muffinlicious has made and list them:

  1.  

the muffilicious timeline

  • "i like ponies and comments"
  • "i like to post and have a good time"
  • "seriously guys? are we doing this immature shit again, fuck. grow up."

Minty wrote:

I'd say this thread disappointed me when I saw the title until I saw Twisty say "that was the worst toy story fanfiction I've ever read."
That implies several things, mate, none of them good.

notice i said the worst TOY STORY one.

y'know, this post is only somewhat related and not shitposty at all, but…
In reality…

Most Fanfiction's are…

Bland and generic. And anyone who thinks otherwise has never actually went browsing for Fanfiction before and has only heard about all the bad apples. And the only reason why said bad apples exist is because any old amateur is able to publish stuff as long as it doesn't break site rules, there are no people rejecting fanfics like they do real books. And since FFN doesn't actively delete Fics that break the rules (fun fact, lemons are actually against FFN rules. I didn't know that for the longest of time…) a lot of those fics are allowed to be published too…

(tl;dr: Most fanfics are okay, not horrible. And there are no people to reject fanfics, so that's the horrible ones can get in)

Thankfully most FFN rules are bullshit.

Now I have to say something shitposty to make up for this post.

Uh….

D I C K S Q U A D?

Last edited Feb 02, 2015 at 12:05PM EST

Captain Blubber wrote:

the muffilicious timeline

  • "i like ponies and comments"
  • "i like to post and have a good time"
  • "seriously guys? are we doing this immature shit again, fuck. grow up."

The muffinlicious achievements:

  • Made a list of KYM things others achieved on his wall.
  • Deleted the list after being made fun off on Riff-Raff.
  • Remade the list in a thread.

muffinlicious before mod: HAHAHA LE EPIN SHITPOSTING HOW FUN IT IS TO POST NONSENSICAL STUFF

muffinlicious after mod: guys come on, we are a serious community and is my job as a mod to keep the forums as serious as possible

James Blunt wrote:

One day while Andy was masturbating, Woody got wood. He could no longer help himself! He watched as Andy stroked his juicy kawaii cock. He approached Andy which startled him and make him pee everywhere on the floor and on Woody too. Being drenched in his urine made him harder than ever! Woody: "Andy Senpai! I'm alive and I want to be INSIDE OF YOU." Andy: "Oh Woody Chan! I always knew you were alive! I want to stuff you up my kawaii ass!" Woody grabbed a bunch of flavored live and rubbed it all over is head Woody: "Oh my! It's cherry flavored lube! Cherry is my favorite! Woody then stuffed his head up into Andy's tight ass! The other toys around the room watched intently as Woody shoved his head back and forth into Andy's nice ass, continuously making a squishy wet noise. The other toys also became aroused and they all gathered around Woody and Andy and started to urinate all over them, and then they started to masturbate. Andy: "Oh my goodness, Woody Chan! You are churning my insides up so well! Your nose is stimulating my prostate! OH YES! All the other toys became so aroused by this, that they could not help themselves anymore! They pushed Woody completely inside, and they all went inside. All of them wanted to be inside Andy's nice round ass. Andy: "No wait guys! My ass cannot hold this much! I'm getting so full! All the toys went inside of poor squirming Andy and pretty much, he was beyond full, and died from having his insides completely damaged. The mother came inside and found Andy, dead with a huge ass hemorrhage on his anus, with a HUGE belly full of toys.

Related.

Snickerway wrote:

That's the most suspiciously phallic bottle of Mountain Dew I've ever seen.

I want twenty.

Bro, that bottle's phallic to you?

You must have seen some really… Elongated, and… Squarish, pairs of testicles to see that…

Wait, it kinda DOES look phallic…

Yet, at the same time, it kinda doesn't!

I dislike you, not-phallic Mountain Dew bottle. You confuse me.

Last edited Feb 02, 2015 at 07:11PM EST

Cecaelia Girlie wrote:

Bro, that bottle's phallic to you?

You must have seen some really… Elongated, and… Squarish, pairs of testicles to see that…

Wait, it kinda DOES look phallic…

Yet, at the same time, it kinda doesn't!

I dislike you, not-phallic Mountain Dew bottle. You confuse me.

Do this tequila bottles looks phallic?

Cecaelia Girlie wrote:

Bro, that bottle's phallic to you?

You must have seen some really… Elongated, and… Squarish, pairs of testicles to see that…

Wait, it kinda DOES look phallic…

Yet, at the same time, it kinda doesn't!

I dislike you, not-phallic Mountain Dew bottle. You confuse me.

If other people can say bananas look like dicks, than I can say a bottle looks like a dick.

Seriously, does any real dick curve at a 45 degree angle and taper off to a point like this?

Dr. MEDIC! wrote:

Do this tequila bottles looks phallic?

….

Y'know, the cap and bottom part are too big to truly look like a head and balls, so I'd say no.

Snickerway: True…

Snickerway wrote:

If other people can say bananas look like dicks, than I can say a bottle looks like a dick.

Seriously, does any real dick curve at a 45 degree angle and taper off to a point like this?

Wait. You're telling me they're not supposed to look like that?

Skeletor-sm

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