Greentext Stories - Images

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Train Call

File: 1348492837031ip-(874 KB, 17282592, IMAG0089CC.jpg) RARA □ Anonymous {ID: BCDVrBKR) 09/24/12(Mon)09:20:37 No 426918250 part 112 be on the train >siting next to falcat -fatcat is on tho phone fatcat trying to order a taxi >phone sional fails fatcat is mad phone signal is still horrible hird time's the charm hi this is fatcat, i taiked 1o you a tew moments ago signal is not that good, i'm on t the train fatcat leaves number >whynot.jpg -set private number on Pcalling fatcat >pleaseletherebesignal.gitT Oops!. did it again l played with your hea... snot sure if Britney Spears fan or even his phone sthis is fatcat, hallo. hallo" fatcat didn't realise i hung up on him right before he answered the phone sfatcal puts phone on table >callback Oops!.I did it aga... "this is fatcat. , anyone there?" speople startto get a bit annoyed as we are siting in the quiet zone fatcat is taking a power nap against the windov See n----- ticket checker comming this way. Anonymous (ID: BCDVIBKR) 09/24/12(Mon)og:21:42 No 426918315 File: 1348492902719.ipg-(937 KB, 1728x2592, IMAG0092CC.jpg) part 2/2 snigger ticket checker is about 30 reet away pleasehavesignal.png perfect timing niggerticket checker is right next to him when the phone starts nnging Oops!.I did it again unitt l played with your heart, got lost in the game Oh baby, ba... -fatcat ends call enigger ticket checker starts to laugh fatcat is grumpy -what are you laughing at?r 커liggel [iじkel checker is apullogíáng but slil iaighing snigger ticket checker moves on as we already showed our tickets once before -out of f------ nowhere fatcat slams his phone so hard his screen breaks Pthis is my stop right as rm passing him rm leting out a silent kilier tart -standing on the platform 00 king at him through the window smaking one last call STHIS IS FATCAT WHAT T WANT?! knocking on the window Peye contac Oops!. did it again l played with your heart got lost in the game Oh baby baby as soon as i stopped singing the train drove away and i hung up THE FUCKDOYou pic related its my fatcat Anonymous (ID: MmFopm53) 09/2412(Mon)09:23:40 No 426918206 10/10, would read again. Anonymous (ID: xoxqCMz0) o9:24/12(Mon)09 2421 No.426913496 Fatcat 24/9-2012 Never forget. · ㄩㄟㄧ-} □ Anonymous (ID: KC1pXrV) 09/24/12(Mon)09:24:24 No.426923604 File: 1348496931437 ipg-(8 KB, 2091200, 1341986918173.jpg) >> Coca-Cola Zero

File: 1348492837031ip-(874 KB, 17282592, IMAG0089CC.jpg) RARA □ Anonymous {ID: BCDVrBKR) 09/24/12(Mon)09:20:37 No 426918250 part 112 be on the train >siting next to falcat -fatcat is on tho phone fatcat trying to order a taxi >phone sional fails fatcat is mad phone signal is still horrible hird time's the charm hi this is fatcat, i taiked 1o you a tew moments ago signal is not that good, i'm on t the train fatcat leaves number >whynot.jpg -set private number on Pcalling fatcat >pleaseletherebesignal.gitT Oops!. did it again l played with your hea... snot sure if Britney Spears fan or even his phone sthis is fatcat, hallo. hallo" fatcat didn't realise i hung up on him right before he answered the phone sfatcal puts phone on table >callback Oops!.I did it aga... "this is fatcat. , anyone there?" speople startto get a bit annoyed as we are siting in the quiet zone fatcat is taking a power nap against the windov See n----- ticket checker comming this way. Anonymous (ID: BCDVIBKR) 09/24/12(Mon)og:21:42 No 426918315 File: 1348492902719.ipg-(937 KB, 1728x2592, IMAG0092CC.jpg) part 2/2 snigger ticket checker is about 30 reet away pleasehavesignal.png perfect timing niggerticket checker is right next to him when the phone starts nnging Oops!.I did it again unitt l played with your heart, got lost in the game Oh baby, ba... -fatcat ends call enigger ticket checker starts to laugh fatcat is grumpy -what are you laughing at?r 커liggel [iじkel checker is apullogíáng but slil iaighing snigger ticket checker moves on as we already showed our tickets once before -out of f------ nowhere fatcat slams his phone so hard his screen breaks Pthis is my stop right as rm passing him rm leting out a silent kilier tart -standing on the platform 00 king at him through the window smaking one last call STHIS IS FATCAT WHAT T WANT?! knocking on the window Peye contac Oops!. did it again l played with your heart got lost in the game Oh baby baby as soon as i stopped singing the train drove away and i hung up THE FUCKDOYou pic related its my fatcat Anonymous (ID: MmFopm53) 09/2412(Mon)09:23:40 No 426918206 10/10, would read again. Anonymous (ID: xoxqCMz0) o9:24/12(Mon)09 2421 No.426913496 Fatcat 24/9-2012 Never forget. · ㄩㄟㄧ-} □ Anonymous (ID: KC1pXrV) 09/24/12(Mon)09:24:24 No.426923604 File: 1348496931437 ipg-(8 KB, 2091200, 1341986918173.jpg) >> Coca-Cola Zero

Greentext Stories

phone prank call train rage troll

> John Wick walks into the room. Command?

□ Anonymous 06/17/1 7(Sat)16:28:04 No. 7361 36523 >>7361 36763 >>7361 36884 227361 37096 >>7361 371 07 227361 37387 361 Turns out John wick has been hired to kill you You have one hour to prepare what do you do? >>736136523 (OP) kill my neighbor, start eating glass and hair as much of it as possible poliece arrest me and i now have a full department of cops and intense security nobody is going to r--- me, buthole full of glass and hair. another option would be innawoods >take knifes as i dont own a rifle >leave clear trail to where im going so he follows dig a foxhole but surround my area with anything dry that will snap when stepped on >lay in it sideways with knife held point up and the slurpee straw next to me in my mouth, preferably head will be in shrubbery >burry self >laying on side so rise and fall of my chest while breathing through the straw is not as visible swait there, s--- in my pants if i have to >when a stick near me snaps i spring out of the earth like a trapdoor spider armed with a 9" Bowie knife and the wrath of god File: 08 The Goatfather.gif (151 KB, 800x453) put "old yeller" on tv max volume put "where the red fern grows" on laptop, max volume sit in room with beautiful nylon string guitan when he enters i sing for him s-i know yer a hurtn but senpai ima blurtn, ill love you till the end of my days, through the hard times,n the good ones, holding hands in the suns rays he will instantly fall in love with me and we can raise our own litter of puppies. we will retire with the money we get from our book >"two massive f------ and a litter of puppies, a tale of redemption

□ Anonymous 06/17/1 7(Sat)16:28:04 No. 7361 36523 >>7361 36763 >>7361 36884 227361 37096 >>7361 371 07 227361 37387 361 Turns out John wick has been hired to kill you You have one hour to prepare what do you do? >>736136523 (OP) kill my neighbor, start eating glass and hair as much of it as possible poliece arrest me and i now have a full department of cops and intense security nobody is going to r--- me, buthole full of glass and hair. another option would be innawoods >take knifes as i dont own a rifle >leave clear trail to where im going so he follows dig a foxhole but surround my area with anything dry that will snap when stepped on >lay in it sideways with knife held point up and the slurpee straw next to me in my mouth, preferably head will be in shrubbery >burry self >laying on side so rise and fall of my chest while breathing through the straw is not as visible swait there, s--- in my pants if i have to >when a stick near me snaps i spring out of the earth like a trapdoor spider armed with a 9" Bowie knife and the wrath of god File: 08 The Goatfather.gif (151 KB, 800x453) put "old yeller" on tv max volume put "where the red fern grows" on laptop, max volume sit in room with beautiful nylon string guitan when he enters i sing for him s-i know yer a hurtn but senpai ima blurtn, ill love you till the end of my days, through the hard times,n the good ones, holding hands in the suns rays he will instantly fall in love with me and we can raise our own litter of puppies. we will retire with the money we get from our book >"two massive f------ and a litter of puppies, a tale of redemption

Greentext Stories

john wick grass old yeller red fern

Goose is Loose

□ Anonymous 12/05/15 Sat 23:25:38 No.28 103985 22281 42472201043352) i S pet 342 28105936 )28 10 51 >live next to river >geese swarm our yard every year >neighbor is korean >likes to practice martial arts in his back yard >go outside one morning and look off our back deck >korean is in dramatic martial arts pose with a staff >4 geese are hissing menacingly 2KKIⅢYYYAAAAAAAAAAAA! >Korean guy charges >geese charge >today the spirits of his warrior anscestors have posessed him, a flurry of blows follow sone goose dead, one with its wing hanging like its broken and the rest run away while broken winged one flops around honking >korean guy makes asian fighting noises while he twirls his staff over his head >the east will show no mercy today he smashes its head >he is breathing heavily and grinning like an idiot asian fighting noises ums as red as it is possible he tums as red as i is possible for an asian to blush for an start clapping sian to blush >hurriedly grabs two dead geese and sprints into his house funniest s--- I've ever seen. the east no mercyktoday

□ Anonymous 12/05/15 Sat 23:25:38 No.28 103985 22281 42472201043352) i S pet 342 28105936 )28 10 51 >live next to river >geese swarm our yard every year >neighbor is korean >likes to practice martial arts in his back yard >go outside one morning and look off our back deck >korean is in dramatic martial arts pose with a staff >4 geese are hissing menacingly 2KKIⅢYYYAAAAAAAAAAAA! >Korean guy charges >geese charge >today the spirits of his warrior anscestors have posessed him, a flurry of blows follow sone goose dead, one with its wing hanging like its broken and the rest run away while broken winged one flops around honking >korean guy makes asian fighting noises while he twirls his staff over his head >the east will show no mercy today he smashes its head >he is breathing heavily and grinning like an idiot asian fighting noises ums as red as it is possible he tums as red as i is possible for an asian to blush for an start clapping sian to blush >hurriedly grabs two dead geese and sprints into his house funniest s--- I've ever seen. the east no mercyktoday

Greentext Stories

goose fight kung fu

It's late at night here but here I am, posting saddening pics of tanks

-The metal that makes up my body has all rusted My engine has been sleeping since my last battle My cannon is non-fünctional >My vision ports are covered in moss >But it doesn't matter -The battle is long over >All I have to do now is to rest, and watch over the flo >My commander told me that flowers should not be trampled by tank trac Until my commander n field of flowe r thi

-The metal that makes up my body has all rusted My engine has been sleeping since my last battle My cannon is non-fünctional >My vision ports are covered in moss >But it doesn't matter -The battle is long over >All I have to do now is to rest, and watch over the flo >My commander told me that flowers should not be trampled by tank trac Until my commander n field of flowe r thi

Greentext Stories

m41 walker bulldog field of flowers peace

Sleep tight, grandpa IS-2 T-T

>my cannon is rusted my engine is long-dead can barely see the vill rough the moss on my visors but I know that the village is still the do not worry vi witt keep you safe just like before: im just a bit tired, thats all:

>my cannon is rusted my engine is long-dead can barely see the vill rough the moss on my visors but I know that the village is still the do not worry vi witt keep you safe just like before: im just a bit tired, thats all:

Greentext Stories

tanks is-2 iosif stalin

Countdown to Ecstasy

File: 1350359380711png-(286 KB, 800x896 6, feelthur.png) GI □ Anonymous (ID: LFqSsx91) 10/15/12/(Mon)20:49:40 UTC-7 No.430909276 >1 am >browsing for p--- >having a hard time finding something good >been fapping for almost an hour >find video of 10/10 goddess giving joi >tells me how to fap isn't a w---- about it >slow and sensual svoice is f------ velvet teases me >doesn't give me permission to c-- until she says so >ohgodfuckyes >worried that this video will get ruined by her saying something stupid and whorey >doesn't >she's a f------ goddess >gives me a countdown of when i get to c-- >ohgodicantholdit >please get to 1 stops at two to tease me >ohgodpleaseletmecum >pulls her mask off >it's bill f------ murray >"no one will ever believe you. now b------------- for me you f------ piggy" >best orgasm of my life

File: 1350359380711png-(286 KB, 800x896 6, feelthur.png) GI □ Anonymous (ID: LFqSsx91) 10/15/12/(Mon)20:49:40 UTC-7 No.430909276 >1 am >browsing for p--- >having a hard time finding something good >been fapping for almost an hour >find video of 10/10 goddess giving joi >tells me how to fap isn't a w---- about it >slow and sensual svoice is f------ velvet teases me >doesn't give me permission to c-- until she says so >ohgodfuckyes >worried that this video will get ruined by her saying something stupid and whorey >doesn't >she's a f------ goddess >gives me a countdown of when i get to c-- >ohgodicantholdit >please get to 1 stops at two to tease me >ohgodpleaseletmecum >pulls her mask off >it's bill f------ murray >"no one will ever believe you. now b------------- for me you f------ piggy" >best orgasm of my life

Greentext Stories

countdown fap bill murray

Battleshitpost

Anonymous (ID: +HSrPhs8) 02/27/13(Wed)17:34:30 No.461742905 BATILES >Be 17 Miss 87 KB JPG

Anonymous (ID: +HSrPhs8) 02/27/13(Wed)17:34:30 No.461742905 BATILES >Be 17 Miss 87 KB JPG

Greentext Stories

Library Bathroom

Anonymous 05/04/17(Thu)22:32:08 No.731513244 be me at the public library the other in the bathroom taking a s--- toilet moves >w--.jpg 93 KB JPG realize that the toilet is bolted through the wall to a toilet in the women's bathroom >whenever a girl sits down on that other toilet, it moves the one i'm sitting on a little bit we both have our asses on these connected toilet seats, so in a way we are connected >if you think about it, it's pretty close to actually having sex with the woman in the other bathroom thatskindahot.png instant boner >jerk it like there's no tomorrow f------ bliss, best nut of my life >clean myself up and leave >come back the next day when it's the busiest and do it again I've been doing this for the past 4 days and it just feels amazing. This is probably the most I've felt like a normie in my entire life, because I'm getting real human intimacy from the other person.

Greentext Stories

library bathroom fap

Terrorism in Poland

>muslim terrorist attack in Poland >drive to Radom airport and want to blow yourself up realize that an airport is completely empty, literally no one is there >with sad face wanna go home >notice that your car was stolen >decide go on foot >it is evening, go to sleep next to the bus station >wake up and realize you got robbed >enter bigger city, wanna find police and ask them for help >get beaten by gentelmen in adidas tracksuit >finally find police and ask them for help >you have no documents, go to prison for 10 month:s >after 10 months get freed of charge >your assylum status in Sweden has ended, since you haven't been there for 6 months >get deported to Middle East

>muslim terrorist attack in Poland >drive to Radom airport and want to blow yourself up realize that an airport is completely empty, literally no one is there >with sad face wanna go home >notice that your car was stolen >decide go on foot >it is evening, go to sleep next to the bus station >wake up and realize you got robbed >enter bigger city, wanna find police and ask them for help >get beaten by gentelmen in adidas tracksuit >finally find police and ask them for help >you have no documents, go to prison for 10 month:s >after 10 months get freed of charge >your assylum status in Sweden has ended, since you haven't been there for 6 months >get deported to Middle East

Greentext Stories

terrorism terrorist poland ironic

Architecture

File: articl (41 KB, 615x409) Anonymous (ID: M8Man5jo) 05/02/14(Fri)15:18:39 No.544778038 > be me, be an architect >boss of the studio i work for comes for a "quick job" > a customer has a pretty new house but wants some adjustment > boss hands me the customer a sheet with the specifics >look throught them, laught, comment "well, whatever, he's paying" > i'm given a week for the whole job > week passes, customer is in the studio > show the new drawings > ive added a nice "arbrech macht frei" to the front gate, to be done in a nice dark grey cast iron > a large swastica mosaic is to be done on the entrance floor, ive already contact a local mosaic artist third-reich eagles decorate the staircase and the very same eagle motif is used again on the courtains > if the customer wants to spend some more, ive sketched furher glass wall to be used in the living room > mfw he wanted an anti-seismic house mfw i read anti-semitic

File: articl (41 KB, 615x409) Anonymous (ID: M8Man5jo) 05/02/14(Fri)15:18:39 No.544778038 > be me, be an architect >boss of the studio i work for comes for a "quick job" > a customer has a pretty new house but wants some adjustment > boss hands me the customer a sheet with the specifics >look throught them, laught, comment "well, whatever, he's paying" > i'm given a week for the whole job > week passes, customer is in the studio > show the new drawings > ive added a nice "arbrech macht frei" to the front gate, to be done in a nice dark grey cast iron > a large swastica mosaic is to be done on the entrance floor, ive already contact a local mosaic artist third-reich eagles decorate the staircase and the very same eagle motif is used again on the courtains > if the customer wants to spend some more, ive sketched furher glass wall to be used in the living room > mfw he wanted an anti-seismic house mfw i read anti-semitic

Greentext Stories

architecture house hitler swastica semitic

Ghost 💩

Anonymous No.643622648 1 hour ago High stories? >Be me, 17 >Going on a boat ride with my 2 bros >High as f--- off brownies >Sitting in some aluminum cheap ass chairs waiting >Taking it all in >Suddenly realize there's something between my thighs >Oh f--- I shat myself >Pretty f------ disappointed in myself >How the f--- did this happen Walk to the bathroom awkwardly so the s--- nugget doesn't fall out of my shorts >Bathroom is near the booth to get the tickets >Huge crowd >F--- man I'm too high for this. Have to pass through people whilst also trying to keep my legs closed >For a high person this is very frustrating >Get in bathroom >mfw it was just my balls mfw I spent 20 mins getting to the bathroom mfw I have no face

Anonymous No.643622648 1 hour ago High stories? >Be me, 17 >Going on a boat ride with my 2 bros >High as f--- off brownies >Sitting in some aluminum cheap ass chairs waiting >Taking it all in >Suddenly realize there's something between my thighs >Oh f--- I shat myself >Pretty f------ disappointed in myself >How the f--- did this happen Walk to the bathroom awkwardly so the s--- nugget doesn't fall out of my shorts >Bathroom is near the booth to get the tickets >Huge crowd >F--- man I'm too high for this. Have to pass through people whilst also trying to keep my legs closed >For a high person this is very frustrating >Get in bathroom >mfw it was just my balls mfw I spent 20 mins getting to the bathroom mfw I have no face

Greentext Stories

high weed turd poo loo balls

Get high / lucky

Anonymous (ID: iVZUMVBi) 09/12/12(Wed)19:38:38 There is mo heavon No.424844538 >walking home from school >see girl like also walking home grow the balls to walk up to her say hey to her >"Hi" >never really talked to her >awkward silence aks me if I want to burn with her f--- yes go to park >she pulls out an ounce of weed f--- yes Only Lavender Townsmoke 3 grams >high af >she asks me if I want to kiss her f--- yes we kiss grabs my d--- f--- yes >starts giving me a b------ >f------ awesome sasks me to finger her >never fingered a girl feelsgood.jpg >asks me to >feelsbetter.jpg ask for 3 finger >does so sasks for my whole hand wut >still does so sasks for both of my hands >more wut >does so >"I need more" >"what else do you need I have both my hands in your p----" >she looks me in the eye >"I need about tree fiddy" >It was about that time when I realized I had both of my hands in the vagina of a 8 storie tall crustacean from the paleozoic era sthat god damned loch ness monster had tricked me again pic not related

Anonymous (ID: iVZUMVBi) 09/12/12(Wed)19:38:38 There is mo heavon No.424844538 >walking home from school >see girl like also walking home grow the balls to walk up to her say hey to her >"Hi" >never really talked to her >awkward silence aks me if I want to burn with her f--- yes go to park >she pulls out an ounce of weed f--- yes Only Lavender Townsmoke 3 grams >high af >she asks me if I want to kiss her f--- yes we kiss grabs my d--- f--- yes >starts giving me a b------ >f------ awesome sasks me to finger her >never fingered a girl feelsgood.jpg >asks me to >feelsbetter.jpg ask for 3 finger >does so sasks for my whole hand wut >still does so sasks for both of my hands >more wut >does so >"I need more" >"what else do you need I have both my hands in your p----" >she looks me in the eye >"I need about tree fiddy" >It was about that time when I realized I had both of my hands in the vagina of a 8 storie tall crustacean from the paleozoic era sthat god damned loch ness monster had tricked me again pic not related

Greentext Stories

high freak loch ness $3.50

Good roommate

purchasing a Seil-serve ad, of buying a TChan Fass Janitor acceptance emails will be sent out over the coming weeks. Make sure to check your spam box! Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] IAuto] 0/0/ 1/? File: my roomate.gif (499 KB, 483x325) ■ Anonymous 05/25/16(Wed)22:32:25 No.686223535 >Be me >Roommate leaves at 4:00 every day Wake up at 4.10 for no confrontation >Decide to j------- on couch in living > Watching webcam p--- while beating off >Roommates cat jumps on couch rubs up against me >Push cat off >Cat jumps back on couch >Grab cat >Decide to put cat in roommates room and close the door like I always do room because roommate is gonde >Cat in one hand, rubbing lotion boner with other hand to remain hard >Walk into roommates room to throw cat inside >Roommate called in sichk >See's me with his cat in one hand >Other hand working a lotion boner >Laugh >He screams Pic related Return] [Catalog] [Topl [Update] [Auto] Post a Reply] 0/0/ 1/?

purchasing a Seil-serve ad, of buying a TChan Fass Janitor acceptance emails will be sent out over the coming weeks. Make sure to check your spam box! Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] IAuto] 0/0/ 1/? File: my roomate.gif (499 KB, 483x325) ■ Anonymous 05/25/16(Wed)22:32:25 No.686223535 >Be me >Roommate leaves at 4:00 every day Wake up at 4.10 for no confrontation >Decide to j------- on couch in living > Watching webcam p--- while beating off >Roommates cat jumps on couch rubs up against me >Push cat off >Cat jumps back on couch >Grab cat >Decide to put cat in roommates room and close the door like I always do room because roommate is gonde >Cat in one hand, rubbing lotion boner with other hand to remain hard >Walk into roommates room to throw cat inside >Roommate called in sichk >See's me with his cat in one hand >Other hand working a lotion boner >Laugh >He screams Pic related Return] [Catalog] [Topl [Update] [Auto] Post a Reply] 0/0/ 1/?

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scream knife fap cat

Musketeer Cont'd

Greentext Stories

musketeer court victory

SLO-mo dick whip

: Anonymous 08/16/16(Tue)1 2:38:16 No.699741454 >>699735884 (OP) # get iPhone 5s >play with slow motion video >hit erect d--- on dresser >watched replay >f------ sweet thought gf would like to see. >video doesn't send in slow motion >normal paced video of me beating the f--- out of my dresser with my c---. >gf thinks I'm a psycho. >breaks up with me. >If it wasn't so funny, I would have cared. >>69974 1592# >>69974 1696 # >>69974 1789 # >>69974 1902 # >>699741980 #

: Anonymous 08/16/16(Tue)1 2:38:16 No.699741454 >>699735884 (OP) # get iPhone 5s >play with slow motion video >hit erect d--- on dresser >watched replay >f------ sweet thought gf would like to see. >video doesn't send in slow motion >normal paced video of me beating the f--- out of my dresser with my c---. >gf thinks I'm a psycho. >breaks up with me. >If it wasn't so funny, I would have cared. >>69974 1592# >>69974 1696 # >>69974 1789 # >>69974 1902 # >>699741980 #

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slow motion girlfriend

Blackbro

. File: 1395371377016g-(15 KB, 350x265, 3558329024 474352014 badp) Anonymous (ID. ALF1AXU) 03/21/14(Fri)03:09:37 UTC No 538216537 PTreveling to friends house for holideys. Tweve hours so lar, driving through the night PAI night, this littlo s--- about ten, hes boen screeming and acting up >Playing Pokemon on his 3DS, announces every afteck in hormble screeching voice, sound effects included Four hours in the batery dies bus has power ports so his Mom puts on charger >Kid uriggling sbout and btching beceuse the battery doesnt charge quickly enough to keep playing right ewey Goes up to several other people in the bus Give me your phone "I wan your geme Mosl people gnore him, some poltely say no. Ha tries to take them anyway Big black dude with iPad tels kid to ga sit down when kid tries to take >Mom not pleased: 거ey don't you dare speak to my son like that you ape You probably cant even use that property." >Back dude p-----, but obiously used to this s---. Also has prety proper accant, Fresh Prince s--- yPiease Ma'am, don't hold us responstie for彻lusing you' child when it was your pour lu gernentto believe your prom debe woukd pukuL 0g >Mom about to叩e, Blackbro smling" od trying to steel another lads PSP Bus driver tels everybody to calm dowm or they'l gel kicked off Kid sits back down, but stil bitches unti he ean play again Doesnt know how to pay the game, keeps geting ass kicked by computer Continugd AnonymouS D: ALF1AXld) 03/21/14(Fny3:20:51 UTC No. 538218309 Repss: 225313885 -Get a few hours of sleep, neck f----- all week from seats >BAM next morning, bus puls into smat shopping ilag >Kid wnke up an hour ago, usual s--- going an, evarybody visibly p----- al him and his Mam Pul ino gas station'shopping center -Everybody wandering around, getting breakfast FKd sust puling stuff off the shelves and stuffing his face with Loops around the slore, around and around >His Mom is just sitting by the coffee stand at the store entrance, reading her tny fuckoing novel at one pege every ben minutes He starts swearing with the full yocabulary of a angsty teenager, knocking stuf off stands and displays with his anms -Tes in the aisle next to the one he's n, neer the end >A few stray cens of vagetables are siting in the speace under the shef Continued. Anonymous (D: ALF1AXid) 03/21/14(Fry3:24:48 UTC No 539218980 Repiss: 2253312231) >Go for goks, lean down, slide can under shet and into next ask Drect hit, hts his left foot and sends him into half 려 cartwheel while stil mertainng forward momentum >F------ swoar, ho looks o a cartoon, comploboly horizontal airtma But then grevity ipg Hts floor, keeps going thanks to super polished les On look.a giant pyramid 며 some liquid snap Estra value, galon botles. Dis gon be good >Into the bese he goes, bottles craish doun around hm >Caos ay off, so steadily pudding around him Mommy dearest sees this, goes into ful sprnt If the soap didnt break anything, her body sliding inlo him wold -She is just stunned, while he's crying and trying to run away >3l sipping around, can't get footing >Slore ownars running to assist while all the passengers are laughing at the two stooges doing their prat fal act >Bleck dude drops cless act and goes al "Ehit homief" on me. As much as wo beggod for him to liavo, bus drhor rotusod to lesve witho a the kid and m >She emerges from the store, looloing like Shrek had bukkaked her 가kid has massive bruise along al the len side of his face trom her he hit the noor -She peels matted hair off her face s"I will find out which one of you did this to my darting, baby boy PiTT, not in a store without securay cameras bich Continusd Anonymous (ID: ALF1AXId) 03/21 14(F3.35.42 UTC No 533220593 Reps: 220321003 2I3221120 2211 221 231822 114 22516221040 >Back on the bus, rding a high from nearly slaughterng the antichrist. -Four hours left, and廿 en vve transfer onso another bus >Kid sha bitching, but this time about his entine body aching Shoud be annoying, but is just music to al of us He talls aseep the rest of te way, I get in some shuleye too atter a s--- nigh >Wake up as bus puls into some small s------- of a town -we all get ofr, some leave, some se and wait for the next bus Mom is very obviously p-----, sticky, tired, and sore After sitting there for half an hour, fuming silenthy You did this didn't you you savage >He calmly denies She's on a rant, pointing at people ike her finger can shoot bulets Few of the locals are hanging around -Sho isnt stupid enough to biatantly say anything raciest to Blaclhro, who is slit calm as fuok Back and forth, she yeis, he denies >Finaly, she says "Ive had it with you people Starts walking oway >Blacktro "What do you mean you people?" It was obvious to everybody she only meant the other passengers, but Blackbro just used the Niggermancers special trap card Stay tuned for the grand finish 凵 Anonymous (ID ALF1AXld) 03/21/14(Fri)03.43 24 UTC №53822 185 1 Repias 2253ZZ211122A8222122aRa She's had it S"I mean you f------ fithy, kid beating niggor! >On and on she goes、spoutng ngger enough to embarass Dave Chappelle >Aher a couple of minules she runs out of brealh and slows down Blacldoro Shouldn't havo said niggar lady on why, you gonns beat me too you f------ monkey?" Blackbro, "I'm not sSits hack, opens up newspeper and starts reating Mom just confused for a moment, but then turns around Fsmernber how E mentioned that al the kcas were black Three portly Shanayneys, doled up in slutty makeup, Take nals and leopard print Where yuu think you goin' honey? >Nigress Unit #1 swings into her ston ach, Mom bends over in par. >Ngress Uihg #2 comes in and kicks her in the left shin. ㎞ocking her foot off balance. >As she fel 9·Nigress Unit 3 comes forward and grabs her by her, edding to her inomentum >Facs lands squarely on Unit #3S giant tree trunk leg knee She's out, kid's erying, crowd begins to disperse PI buy Bleckbro lunch >Bus shows up just around the time the cops do, we all get on and book it as Mom comas to >She begins to n after the bus as starts, but realises te futility and turns back PLast we see of her is her scresming at her Rid I remember her mentioning the trip was about imporlant business, lol f--- her. I stil see Blackbro every time I close my eyes THE END (Have other stories if requested.)

. File: 1395371377016g-(15 KB, 350x265, 3558329024 474352014 badp) Anonymous (ID. ALF1AXU) 03/21/14(Fri)03:09:37 UTC No 538216537 PTreveling to friends house for holideys. Tweve hours so lar, driving through the night PAI night, this littlo s--- about ten, hes boen screeming and acting up >Playing Pokemon on his 3DS, announces every afteck in hormble screeching voice, sound effects included Four hours in the batery dies bus has power ports so his Mom puts on charger >Kid uriggling sbout and btching beceuse the battery doesnt charge quickly enough to keep playing right ewey Goes up to several other people in the bus Give me your phone "I wan your geme Mosl people gnore him, some poltely say no. Ha tries to take them anyway Big black dude with iPad tels kid to ga sit down when kid tries to take >Mom not pleased: 거ey don't you dare speak to my son like that you ape You probably cant even use that property." >Back dude p-----, but obiously used to this s---. Also has prety proper accant, Fresh Prince s--- yPiease Ma'am, don't hold us responstie for彻lusing you' child when it was your pour lu gernentto believe your prom debe woukd pukuL 0g >Mom about to叩e, Blackbro smling" od trying to steel another lads PSP Bus driver tels everybody to calm dowm or they'l gel kicked off Kid sits back down, but stil bitches unti he ean play again Doesnt know how to pay the game, keeps geting ass kicked by computer Continugd AnonymouS D: ALF1AXld) 03/21/14(Fny3:20:51 UTC No. 538218309 Repss: 225313885 -Get a few hours of sleep, neck f----- all week from seats >BAM next morning, bus puls into smat shopping ilag >Kid wnke up an hour ago, usual s--- going an, evarybody visibly p----- al him and his Mam Pul ino gas station'shopping center -Everybody wandering around, getting breakfast FKd sust puling stuff off the shelves and stuffing his face with Loops around the slore, around and around >His Mom is just sitting by the coffee stand at the store entrance, reading her tny fuckoing novel at one pege every ben minutes He starts swearing with the full yocabulary of a angsty teenager, knocking stuf off stands and displays with his anms -Tes in the aisle next to the one he's n, neer the end >A few stray cens of vagetables are siting in the speace under the shef Continued. Anonymous (D: ALF1AXid) 03/21/14(Fry3:24:48 UTC No 539218980 Repiss: 2253312231) >Go for goks, lean down, slide can under shet and into next ask Drect hit, hts his left foot and sends him into half 려 cartwheel while stil mertainng forward momentum >F------ swoar, ho looks o a cartoon, comploboly horizontal airtma But then grevity ipg Hts floor, keeps going thanks to super polished les On look.a giant pyramid 며 some liquid snap Estra value, galon botles. Dis gon be good >Into the bese he goes, bottles craish doun around hm >Caos ay off, so steadily pudding around him Mommy dearest sees this, goes into ful sprnt If the soap didnt break anything, her body sliding inlo him wold -She is just stunned, while he's crying and trying to run away >3l sipping around, can't get footing >Slore ownars running to assist while all the passengers are laughing at the two stooges doing their prat fal act >Bleck dude drops cless act and goes al "Ehit homief" on me. As much as wo beggod for him to liavo, bus drhor rotusod to lesve witho a the kid and m >She emerges from the store, looloing like Shrek had bukkaked her 가kid has massive bruise along al the len side of his face trom her he hit the noor -She peels matted hair off her face s"I will find out which one of you did this to my darting, baby boy PiTT, not in a store without securay cameras bich Continusd Anonymous (ID: ALF1AXId) 03/21 14(F3.35.42 UTC No 533220593 Reps: 220321003 2I3221120 2211 221 231822 114 22516221040 >Back on the bus, rding a high from nearly slaughterng the antichrist. -Four hours left, and廿 en vve transfer onso another bus >Kid sha bitching, but this time about his entine body aching Shoud be annoying, but is just music to al of us He talls aseep the rest of te way, I get in some shuleye too atter a s--- nigh >Wake up as bus puls into some small s------- of a town -we all get ofr, some leave, some se and wait for the next bus Mom is very obviously p-----, sticky, tired, and sore After sitting there for half an hour, fuming silenthy You did this didn't you you savage >He calmly denies She's on a rant, pointing at people ike her finger can shoot bulets Few of the locals are hanging around -Sho isnt stupid enough to biatantly say anything raciest to Blaclhro, who is slit calm as fuok Back and forth, she yeis, he denies >Finaly, she says "Ive had it with you people Starts walking oway >Blacktro "What do you mean you people?" It was obvious to everybody she only meant the other passengers, but Blackbro just used the Niggermancers special trap card Stay tuned for the grand finish 凵 Anonymous (ID ALF1AXld) 03/21/14(Fri)03.43 24 UTC №53822 185 1 Repias 2253ZZ211122A8222122aRa She's had it S"I mean you f------ fithy, kid beating niggor! >On and on she goes、spoutng ngger enough to embarass Dave Chappelle >Aher a couple of minules she runs out of brealh and slows down Blacldoro Shouldn't havo said niggar lady on why, you gonns beat me too you f------ monkey?" Blackbro, "I'm not sSits hack, opens up newspeper and starts reating Mom just confused for a moment, but then turns around Fsmernber how E mentioned that al the kcas were black Three portly Shanayneys, doled up in slutty makeup, Take nals and leopard print Where yuu think you goin' honey? >Nigress Unit #1 swings into her ston ach, Mom bends over in par. >Ngress Uihg #2 comes in and kicks her in the left shin. ㎞ocking her foot off balance. >As she fel 9·Nigress Unit 3 comes forward and grabs her by her, edding to her inomentum >Facs lands squarely on Unit #3S giant tree trunk leg knee She's out, kid's erying, crowd begins to disperse PI buy Bleckbro lunch >Bus shows up just around the time the cops do, we all get on and book it as Mom comas to >She begins to n after the bus as starts, but realises te futility and turns back PLast we see of her is her scresming at her Rid I remember her mentioning the trip was about imporlant business, lol f--- her. I stil see Blackbro every time I close my eyes THE END (Have other stories if requested.)

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blackbro bro bus black racist whuppin

Everything went better than expected.

File: 1334797055.ipa-(33 KB, 500x500, 1330853175379jpg) □ Anonymous (ID: by9VNsb) 04/18/12(Wed)20:57:35 No.39431 0219 Cool black people stories 2 >be at friends house, he's black sturns out he has like 4 other black friends over swe all joke around, having a good time sdrinking some mtdew in a cup all of the sudden i get too worked up sthe word n----- slips out of my mouth room is dead f------ silent sbegin to sweat, looking around nervously oh s--- oh f--- sfriend looks at me thuh f--- dju just say, bitch? >serious face, he looks p----- NGSER Whoah, dude. Sorry. S---. him and his friends get super f------ scary and serious friend turns to this HUGE n---- friend behind him yo man, ice dis n----. she starts walking towards me >im scared shitless she comes real close to me leans down in my face >puts ice in my mt dew sentire house echoes with n----- laughter now that I think about it, it was pretty goddamn funny

File: 1334797055.ipa-(33 KB, 500x500, 1330853175379jpg) □ Anonymous (ID: by9VNsb) 04/18/12(Wed)20:57:35 No.39431 0219 Cool black people stories 2 >be at friends house, he's black sturns out he has like 4 other black friends over swe all joke around, having a good time sdrinking some mtdew in a cup all of the sudden i get too worked up sthe word n----- slips out of my mouth room is dead f------ silent sbegin to sweat, looking around nervously oh s--- oh f--- sfriend looks at me thuh f--- dju just say, bitch? >serious face, he looks p----- NGSER Whoah, dude. Sorry. S---. him and his friends get super f------ scary and serious friend turns to this HUGE n---- friend behind him yo man, ice dis n----. she starts walking towards me >im scared shitless she comes real close to me leans down in my face >puts ice in my mt dew sentire house echoes with n----- laughter now that I think about it, it was pretty goddamn funny

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4chan black people reversal plot twist disappointed black guy

Brotier Serial Killer

File: 1378910856815.ipg-(57 KB, 500x333, 20100624iberico-badtop.jpg) □ Anonymous 09/11/13(Wed)10:47:36 No.505455 154 Replies: >>505456254 >>505457040 >2505457 How about a True but Funny thread? Here is my story >turned 20 >go out to celebrate my birthday >having the time of my life drunk >suddenly >get kidnapped >wake up in basement >hungry as f--- >guy with green masks come >"dude do you have some food? im starving to death" >he looks at me >im kinda scared, but really hungry too >"Please man, im dying of hunger here" > "Oh yeah.. what do you want?" with an calm but scary voice >"idk, do you have beef jerky or something?" >he turns around >ishelaughing jpg >"hey man, why are you laughing?" she turns around >"stay still, ill be right back" >less afraid and more hungry >ithinkimgonnadieofhunger >he comes back A M------------ BEEF JERKY SANDWICH >eat the s--- out of it >say "Thanks bro" >He kinda looks at me like a dog with armes crossed >start getting scared again, know im gonna die >say "atleast now, i can die in peace" >dude brakes the s--- and starts crying of laughter >unties me from chair >hits me in the head with a shovel while laughing >wake up in a motel >go home >26 now, never seen him agairn >never reported it either mfw, almost got killed , guy was brotier

File: 1378910856815.ipg-(57 KB, 500x333, 20100624iberico-badtop.jpg) □ Anonymous 09/11/13(Wed)10:47:36 No.505455 154 Replies: >>505456254 >>505457040 >2505457 How about a True but Funny thread? Here is my story >turned 20 >go out to celebrate my birthday >having the time of my life drunk >suddenly >get kidnapped >wake up in basement >hungry as f--- >guy with green masks come >"dude do you have some food? im starving to death" >he looks at me >im kinda scared, but really hungry too >"Please man, im dying of hunger here" > "Oh yeah.. what do you want?" with an calm but scary voice >"idk, do you have beef jerky or something?" >he turns around >ishelaughing jpg >"hey man, why are you laughing?" she turns around >"stay still, ill be right back" >less afraid and more hungry >ithinkimgonnadieofhunger >he comes back A M------------ BEEF JERKY SANDWICH >eat the s--- out of it >say "Thanks bro" >He kinda looks at me like a dog with armes crossed >start getting scared again, know im gonna die >say "atleast now, i can die in peace" >dude brakes the s--- and starts crying of laughter >unties me from chair >hits me in the head with a shovel while laughing >wake up in a motel >go home >26 now, never seen him agairn >never reported it either mfw, almost got killed , guy was brotier

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brotier kidnap shovel beef jerky killer

Corrupted Save

04/29/13(Mon)12:45 No. 187606013 Anonymous File: (3 KB, 126x126, 1271706413287.jpg) >>187605330 Some friends are having a birthday for one of their younger brothers >They have a gamecube permanently turned on with pretty much everything unlocked in Smash Bros but no memory card (they were a bit poor) >l got him a memory card for his present >When no one is watching, save the Smash data >Little later, nonchalantly ask what's up with the gamecube, my hand is on the power button >Friend and his little brothers freak out as I turn it off >Smallest one is crying "just kidding, happy birthday!" >Plug in the memory card and turn it back on >Save file corrupted Replies >187606189 >>187606194>187606297 >>187606380 >187606458 187606547 >s18760676 187609460 633187607212 187609156 3187609419

04/29/13(Mon)12:45 No. 187606013 Anonymous File: (3 KB, 126x126, 1271706413287.jpg) >>187605330 Some friends are having a birthday for one of their younger brothers >They have a gamecube permanently turned on with pretty much everything unlocked in Smash Bros but no memory card (they were a bit poor) >l got him a memory card for his present >When no one is watching, save the Smash data >Little later, nonchalantly ask what's up with the gamecube, my hand is on the power button >Friend and his little brothers freak out as I turn it off >Smallest one is crying "just kidding, happy birthday!" >Plug in the memory card and turn it back on >Save file corrupted Replies >187606189 >>187606194>187606297 >>187606380 >187606458 187606547 >s18760676 187609460 633187607212 187609156 3187609419

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gamecube smash bros save file

Loop Zoop

2235574459 # reminds me get wisdom teeth removed >go home high as s--- get on the computer go to youtube really want to listen to Led Zeppelin ( don't even listen to them regularly) >keep typing in Led Zeppelin but nothing Led Zeppelin-related is coming up get mad >go to bed >sleep for like 12 hours. >wake up >go to delete my browsing history like I usually do "loop zoop" searched on youtube 25 times >I thought I was typing in "Led Zeppelin'"

2235574459 # reminds me get wisdom teeth removed >go home high as s--- get on the computer go to youtube really want to listen to Led Zeppelin ( don't even listen to them regularly) >keep typing in Led Zeppelin but nothing Led Zeppelin-related is coming up get mad >go to bed >sleep for like 12 hours. >wake up >go to delete my browsing history like I usually do "loop zoop" searched on youtube 25 times >I thought I was typing in "Led Zeppelin'"

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led zeppelin drugs high