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Tards and a Panther

#35-the reasonable perso (01/03/201 4 H Here is a tard event of my own. Happened about a year ago. Some parts may be exaggerated for comedic effect. Be working for a museum that collects old armored vehicles We have this 1942 Panther tank that my boss is really f------ proud of. Its just a metal shell really. It doesn't work anymore I'm escorting a school tour group. Itis obvious that some of them are Ivl 100 tards Another guy, we'll call him Al, is talking about the things were showing them. We come to the Panther which is parked next to a british Matilda I'm getting bored so lean against the wall and entertain myself by pushing a little cockroach around Boss has showed up and is talking proudly about the tank. I notice a few of the students have walked off and I go to find them. l find them. 2 tards. Pissing on the matilda Ohhellno.gif "Hey! What do you think you're doing!?" One of them tries to run but is tripped by his pants that are around his ankles He smashes his face against the panther. He screams and projectile s---- all over the left rear of the tank. My boss turns around to see the commotion Deathstare jpeg Boss looks like he's about to go full rage mode He kicks all the specials eds out and polishes the entire tank for f------ hours Me and Al continue the tour with the remaining students
#35-the reasonable perso (01/03/201 4 H Here is a tard event of my own. Happened about a year ago. Some parts may be exaggerated for comedic effect. Be working for a museum that collects old armored vehicles We have this 1942 Panther tank that my boss is really f------ proud of. Its just a metal shell really. It doesn't work anymore I'm escorting a school tour group. Itis obvious that some of them are Ivl 100 tards Another guy, we'll call him Al, is talking about the things were showing them. We come to the Panther which is parked next to a british Matilda I'm getting bored so lean against the wall and entertain myself by pushing a little cockroach around Boss has showed up and is talking proudly about the tank. I notice a few of the students have walked off and I go to find them. l find them. 2 tards. Pissing on the matilda Ohhellno.gif "Hey! What do you think you're doing!?" One of them tries to run but is tripped by his pants that are around his ankles He smashes his face against the panther. He screams and projectile s---- all over the left rear of the tank. My boss turns around to see the commotion Deathstare jpeg Boss looks like he's about to go full rage mode He kicks all the specials eds out and polishes the entire tank for f------ hours Me and Al continue the tour with the remaining students

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Brian and Bradley

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:41:55 No.615137363 >middle school >school has a television set for child versed news >play them every morning >but today was special svery special >two of our local retards were doing a realtime, locally aired seminar on bullying stheir names were brian and bradley swrangler holding post in the background sthey started off giving examples of what bullying was >"saying names, ummmumm and hitting people" >"all demanstrate" >OH S--- >brian punches bradley in the a "OW SToooPID" >punches him back >you could see the wrangler getting ready to rumble sthey start screaming >it was like surround sound throughout the entire building >they sprinted out of the room before the wrangler even knew what happened >everybody in the school was out of their seats and ready to herd into the halls >bradley was running away from brian crying and s------- himself all the same >the screaming over the microphone continued more distorted and screeching more distinctly every second sthey were going f------ nuts >bradley tripped and brian immediately pulled down his sweatpants >bradley is screaming for mercy at this point, face as red as a pink blueberry, and tears streaming down his eyes >he was f------ pissing on him h-------- sby now half the school was crowded around thenm swrangler grabs brian by the arms and starts pulling him away suncontrolled streams spraying those in front row seats >nothing but screaming sone of the teachers pulls out a peanut butter jar, open with a plastic spoon in it swut >suddenly everything goes quiet except the sobbing of this humiliated buttered potatoe fermenting on the ground >everybody goes back to class and nothing ever happened since
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:41:55 No.615137363 >middle school >school has a television set for child versed news >play them every morning >but today was special svery special >two of our local retards were doing a realtime, locally aired seminar on bullying stheir names were brian and bradley swrangler holding post in the background sthey started off giving examples of what bullying was >"saying names, ummmumm and hitting people" >"all demanstrate" >OH S--- >brian punches bradley in the a "OW SToooPID" >punches him back >you could see the wrangler getting ready to rumble sthey start screaming >it was like surround sound throughout the entire building >they sprinted out of the room before the wrangler even knew what happened >everybody in the school was out of their seats and ready to herd into the halls >bradley was running away from brian crying and s------- himself all the same >the screaming over the microphone continued more distorted and screeching more distinctly every second sthey were going f------ nuts >bradley tripped and brian immediately pulled down his sweatpants >bradley is screaming for mercy at this point, face as red as a pink blueberry, and tears streaming down his eyes >he was f------ pissing on him h-------- sby now half the school was crowded around thenm swrangler grabs brian by the arms and starts pulling him away suncontrolled streams spraying those in front row seats >nothing but screaming sone of the teachers pulls out a peanut butter jar, open with a plastic spoon in it swut >suddenly everything goes quiet except the sobbing of this humiliated buttered potatoe fermenting on the ground >everybody goes back to class and nothing ever happened since

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Jacob want's his home gril!

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:23:40 No. 61 5127074 615127215 끄615128945 me >meet tard from class, name Jacolb >Jacob is the only tard in school, so naturally everyone loves him in stard approaches crush ome >tells her "baby we can go back and listen to nickelback" >she says eff that, wants no part of it >Jacob starts going crazy >spits in her hair >I'm the only one in class laughing, teacher is giving me the meanest of all the scowls >she tries to get up to leave >Jacob is blocking her way for some reason, Jacob taught himself that whenever you close your lips to kiss someone you also have to close your eyes >doesn't see where his lips are landin >misses completely and falls over desk >hits head on a desk that was right next to it >at this point I'm about ready to piss my pants >Jacob gets up, notices crush leaving the room and says "N---- YOU GET BACK HERE >out of embarrassment, I left the room was in the bathroom the rest of the day >called mom to ask if she could bring fresh pair of underwear and pants >say it's a long story and Ill explain it later Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:25:07 No. 61 512721 5 ▶ 615127331 22615128945 >opening of the local pool is today >of course Jacob wanting to see all of his home grils in 2 pieces is first in line to get in >also the last person in line >is only person in line >about an hour later, people start to show up >Jacob blasts through the doors >doesnt even pay admission >doesnt care either >literally the only one in the entire pool besides the staff >yells "WOMEN WITH YOUR BOOBS LET EM HANG OUT" >me, being in the middle of the line, can hear and see him through the chain link fence >collapse from laughter, it's math class all over again >went swimming for a bit, got ready to go home >but as I was leaving, out of ALL the people that could show up >his crush piece >Jacob is aiming down the sights of his red hot boner >approaches her and says >"baby you better get on this it aint gonna last" I should mention, at this point, everyone in the town besides Jacob's family absolutely hates him >crush slaps his face >cries like a little girl >mom comes over, unaware of what happened >asks >says to mom "I didn't get laid again" >feeling like I might have a hernia from laughing this hard Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:26:14 No.61 5127331 >>615127908と2615128945 >see friend is now friends with Jacob >tilt head back in amazement that tard can use computer go to his profile >profile picture is Quagmire from Family Guy She's obsessed with that show >look at his status updates >he's been listening to "Something in your Mouth by nickelback for 3 days >delve into this hurricane of laughter and hysteria >find out that he's been sharing selfies of crushes he has >status updates say "I want "crush" in me so bad She is my weakest link >Have no idea what he's trying to say >Look a little further >Obsessed with something called Flash Cotton" >Assume it's a superhero of some sort, I dont know >discover that Jacob makes bitstrips over >read all of them >laugh to the point where snot is coming out of my nose >mostly incoherent dribble about how he wants it to rain 50,000 inches today or how he's going to London to bang his girls Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:31:01 No.615127908 · 226151289452261512902922615133849 >last day of sch >Jacob going crazy that >doesnt realize he doesnt have any friends >thinks all the popular kids are his friends because they mess with him occasionally he wont see any of his friends again we're in biology >taking my exam et >all of the sudden I hear moaning >Jacob is crying Steacher tries to calm him down >jacob goes on about how he's going to miss his homies and how he's moving to Auckland, New Zealand >probably doesn't even know where that is anyways he keeps crying >holding back laughter >all of the sudden I hear from Jacob "and it's all because of YOUR FAULT! >points to his crush >don't care about the exam anymore, too busy looking at what's going to happen >she tries not to be a part of it >l don't blame her >Jacob, while crying, asks her "Why you haven't banged with me baby? I got a tool" >There's the biggest mixture of snot, saliva, and tears (all from laughter) all over my exam >Jacob slams his hand on the desk and yells "DAMMIT steacher at this point doesn't know what to do anymore, tries to get Jacob out of the class >Jacob is resistant >our biology class does not apply to the saying "resistance is futile" >punches teacher in the stomach steacher (who is around 350 pounds) lets out the loudest burp Ive ever heard in my life >I'm the only one laughing, I feel ashamed >Screams >Leaves class in the hallways >Says that he wants to bang his homeboys fail the exam
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:23:40 No. 61 5127074 615127215 끄615128945 me >meet tard from class, name Jacolb >Jacob is the only tard in school, so naturally everyone loves him in stard approaches crush ome >tells her "baby we can go back and listen to nickelback" >she says eff that, wants no part of it >Jacob starts going crazy >spits in her hair >I'm the only one in class laughing, teacher is giving me the meanest of all the scowls >she tries to get up to leave >Jacob is blocking her way for some reason, Jacob taught himself that whenever you close your lips to kiss someone you also have to close your eyes >doesn't see where his lips are landin >misses completely and falls over desk >hits head on a desk that was right next to it >at this point I'm about ready to piss my pants >Jacob gets up, notices crush leaving the room and says "N---- YOU GET BACK HERE >out of embarrassment, I left the room was in the bathroom the rest of the day >called mom to ask if she could bring fresh pair of underwear and pants >say it's a long story and Ill explain it later Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:25:07 No. 61 512721 5 ▶ 615127331 22615128945 >opening of the local pool is today >of course Jacob wanting to see all of his home grils in 2 pieces is first in line to get in >also the last person in line >is only person in line >about an hour later, people start to show up >Jacob blasts through the doors >doesnt even pay admission >doesnt care either >literally the only one in the entire pool besides the staff >yells "WOMEN WITH YOUR BOOBS LET EM HANG OUT" >me, being in the middle of the line, can hear and see him through the chain link fence >collapse from laughter, it's math class all over again >went swimming for a bit, got ready to go home >but as I was leaving, out of ALL the people that could show up >his crush piece >Jacob is aiming down the sights of his red hot boner >approaches her and says >"baby you better get on this it aint gonna last" I should mention, at this point, everyone in the town besides Jacob's family absolutely hates him >crush slaps his face >cries like a little girl >mom comes over, unaware of what happened >asks >says to mom "I didn't get laid again" >feeling like I might have a hernia from laughing this hard Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:26:14 No.61 5127331 >>615127908と2615128945 >see friend is now friends with Jacob >tilt head back in amazement that tard can use computer go to his profile >profile picture is Quagmire from Family Guy She's obsessed with that show >look at his status updates >he's been listening to "Something in your Mouth by nickelback for 3 days >delve into this hurricane of laughter and hysteria >find out that he's been sharing selfies of crushes he has >status updates say "I want "crush" in me so bad She is my weakest link >Have no idea what he's trying to say >Look a little further >Obsessed with something called Flash Cotton" >Assume it's a superhero of some sort, I dont know >discover that Jacob makes bitstrips over >read all of them >laugh to the point where snot is coming out of my nose >mostly incoherent dribble about how he wants it to rain 50,000 inches today or how he's going to London to bang his girls Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:31:01 No.615127908 · 226151289452261512902922615133849 >last day of sch >Jacob going crazy that >doesnt realize he doesnt have any friends >thinks all the popular kids are his friends because they mess with him occasionally he wont see any of his friends again we're in biology >taking my exam et >all of the sudden I hear moaning >Jacob is crying Steacher tries to calm him down >jacob goes on about how he's going to miss his homies and how he's moving to Auckland, New Zealand >probably doesn't even know where that is anyways he keeps crying >holding back laughter >all of the sudden I hear from Jacob "and it's all because of YOUR FAULT! >points to his crush >don't care about the exam anymore, too busy looking at what's going to happen >she tries not to be a part of it >l don't blame her >Jacob, while crying, asks her "Why you haven't banged with me baby? I got a tool" >There's the biggest mixture of snot, saliva, and tears (all from laughter) all over my exam >Jacob slams his hand on the desk and yells "DAMMIT steacher at this point doesn't know what to do anymore, tries to get Jacob out of the class >Jacob is resistant >our biology class does not apply to the saying "resistance is futile" >punches teacher in the stomach steacher (who is around 350 pounds) lets out the loudest burp Ive ever heard in my life >I'm the only one laughing, I feel ashamed >Screams >Leaves class in the hallways >Says that he wants to bang his homeboys fail the exam

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Would this be a point in favor, or aginst; playing on the toilet?

> 3rd grade, in bathroom stall, taking biggest most painful dump of my life. >Retards are taking some walk around school, have to use restroom before they leave. >Stall closed, sitting on the toilet, pushing and alternating playing my gameboy as I wait for this s--- to be over. >1 tard to the left, 1 tard to the right. 1 tard doesn't realize I'm in there, or just doesn't care, charges in, breaks door lock, almost naked cept for his shirt. > Freak the f--- out, hit him with gameboy on side of his head. >Blood on Gameboy, blood everywhere, he instantly s---- and pees himself on the way to the floor >Run for my life and fake being sick for 2 weeks to stay out of school >Come back to find out that another retard was blamed for the fighting and the handler who was nowhere to be found fired. Awesome
> 3rd grade, in bathroom stall, taking biggest most painful dump of my life. >Retards are taking some walk around school, have to use restroom before they leave. >Stall closed, sitting on the toilet, pushing and alternating playing my gameboy as I wait for this s--- to be over. >1 tard to the left, 1 tard to the right. 1 tard doesn't realize I'm in there, or just doesn't care, charges in, breaks door lock, almost naked cept for his shirt. > Freak the f--- out, hit him with gameboy on side of his head. >Blood on Gameboy, blood everywhere, he instantly s---- and pees himself on the way to the floor >Run for my life and fake being sick for 2 weeks to stay out of school >Come back to find out that another retard was blamed for the fighting and the handler who was nowhere to be found fired. Awesome

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A tard at the clinic.

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:37:17 No.615144826 >sitting in clinic this afternoon >small family with a middle age downs tard sitting with them >the mother starts getting pale >asks tard to quickly go to the car to grab her medicine and some jellybeans stard grabs keys and runs time passes >half an hour goes by >the mum is getting super pale staff ask if she is okay stells staff shes "giving her brother responsibility" or something along those lines >staff can't do anything as she has basically refused treatment >another 15 mins goes by and her husband offers to go find tard >she flares up and starts raging about how he never gives her brother a chance to do something >husband leaves anyway to find him >by this time a full hour has passed sthe airconditioning in the building has also stopped working (this is important later) >lady looks like she is going to faint >her child is starting to cry >hear an argument outside >the tard and husband return stards left hand looks like its gone through nam >blood everywhere >yet in his right hand he is holding what seems to be a mangled tin of tuna >listen in on husbands explination >husband went out into carpark couldn't find him >went behind the clinic to see if tard hid around there >found tard with his hand wedged in industrial aircon fan >tard had smashed the protective cover off the fan to try and use it to open unexplained tuna husband pulls tard hand out of the machine >asks tard where he's been and where he got the tuna stard had grabbed the pills and jellybeans and swapped them to passing black people for tuna >nearly died laughing after hearing this luckily was called into the doctor >mfw police are arresting the tard as i leave and the waiting room looks like a Tarantino film
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:37:17 No.615144826 >sitting in clinic this afternoon >small family with a middle age downs tard sitting with them >the mother starts getting pale >asks tard to quickly go to the car to grab her medicine and some jellybeans stard grabs keys and runs time passes >half an hour goes by >the mum is getting super pale staff ask if she is okay stells staff shes "giving her brother responsibility" or something along those lines >staff can't do anything as she has basically refused treatment >another 15 mins goes by and her husband offers to go find tard >she flares up and starts raging about how he never gives her brother a chance to do something >husband leaves anyway to find him >by this time a full hour has passed sthe airconditioning in the building has also stopped working (this is important later) >lady looks like she is going to faint >her child is starting to cry >hear an argument outside >the tard and husband return stards left hand looks like its gone through nam >blood everywhere >yet in his right hand he is holding what seems to be a mangled tin of tuna >listen in on husbands explination >husband went out into carpark couldn't find him >went behind the clinic to see if tard hid around there >found tard with his hand wedged in industrial aircon fan >tard had smashed the protective cover off the fan to try and use it to open unexplained tuna husband pulls tard hand out of the machine >asks tard where he's been and where he got the tuna stard had grabbed the pills and jellybeans and swapped them to passing black people for tuna >nearly died laughing after hearing this luckily was called into the doctor >mfw police are arresting the tard as i leave and the waiting room looks like a Tarantino film

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Donovan... I got nothing

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:30:26 No.615144012 >Be me >Be in high school >sitting in gym one day waiting for the teacher this one tard named donovan >donovan gets up and goes to the sports equipment closet >he throws out everything and gets out a big exercise ball >Donovan bounces around shrieking like a total moron >He falls off >Some kid laughs at him and says "F--" >donovan grabs a jumprope and wraps it around the kids neck >the kid is strugguling as donovan chokes more tightly the teacher walks in >Donvan imediatley lets go and runs out into the hallway into the girls bathroom >The teacher follows but calls the female guidance counseler to get him out >The rest of us watch >we hear a loud scream as the counseler leaves covering her face and running back to her office >Tard wrangalers show up >Donovan bolts out of the bathroom >Tard wranglers can't catch him >school goes on lockdown as donovan roam s the hallways shrieking watch from the gym window as he runs back and fourth >l see him running with a pair of scissors >Oh god hear a really loud scream. louder than anything I've heard that day >everyone walks outsideto see what happened >the school psychologist is bleeding with scissors shoved in her stomach > several men walk in. (I dont know if they were wranglers or police or some kind of service funded by the institution) >They tranquilize donovan and remove him as the paramedics arrive to take care of the school counselor
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:30:26 No.615144012 >Be me >Be in high school >sitting in gym one day waiting for the teacher this one tard named donovan >donovan gets up and goes to the sports equipment closet >he throws out everything and gets out a big exercise ball >Donovan bounces around shrieking like a total moron >He falls off >Some kid laughs at him and says "F--" >donovan grabs a jumprope and wraps it around the kids neck >the kid is strugguling as donovan chokes more tightly the teacher walks in >Donvan imediatley lets go and runs out into the hallway into the girls bathroom >The teacher follows but calls the female guidance counseler to get him out >The rest of us watch >we hear a loud scream as the counseler leaves covering her face and running back to her office >Tard wrangalers show up >Donovan bolts out of the bathroom >Tard wranglers can't catch him >school goes on lockdown as donovan roam s the hallways shrieking watch from the gym window as he runs back and fourth >l see him running with a pair of scissors >Oh god hear a really loud scream. louder than anything I've heard that day >everyone walks outsideto see what happened >the school psychologist is bleeding with scissors shoved in her stomach > several men walk in. (I dont know if they were wranglers or police or some kind of service funded by the institution) >They tranquilize donovan and remove him as the paramedics arrive to take care of the school counselor

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Shit end of the genetics stick.

Alright, let's do this s--- >High School during lunch in the cafeteria >Me and my friend are in line for some m-----------' pizza, bitch >All of a sudden, like some kind of parade of people who got the s--- end of the genetics stick, the special ed class rolls on in the place >These people are SUPER retarded. If you've ever had to spend lots of time around retards you probably have observed there are certain levels of retard. Well these kids were the retards amongst retards >Me and my friend try to ignore them while waiting for our s----- school pizza but one of them, a f------ fat ginger kid is right behind me yelling IWANT CHEESE!" in his mangled retard English >Me and my friend continue to ignore him >As we go up to get our pizza one of the lunch ladies hands retardo a slice of cheese pizza >He completely freaks the f--- out because of this >He takes off his shirt revealing his gigantic f------ moobs and starts swinging it around going "AUGH! AUGH! AUGHI AUGH! >He then throws the pizza right at this hot blonde girl behind us >He then freezes as if he's just realized what he's done >He then turms very red and farts f------ loudly >He starts crying >Tuns out he actually s--- himself as when his retard tamer was ushering him away watery s--- was sliding down his legs >mfw during this entire ordeal
Alright, let's do this s--- >High School during lunch in the cafeteria >Me and my friend are in line for some m-----------' pizza, bitch >All of a sudden, like some kind of parade of people who got the s--- end of the genetics stick, the special ed class rolls on in the place >These people are SUPER retarded. If you've ever had to spend lots of time around retards you probably have observed there are certain levels of retard. Well these kids were the retards amongst retards >Me and my friend try to ignore them while waiting for our s----- school pizza but one of them, a f------ fat ginger kid is right behind me yelling IWANT CHEESE!" in his mangled retard English >Me and my friend continue to ignore him >As we go up to get our pizza one of the lunch ladies hands retardo a slice of cheese pizza >He completely freaks the f--- out because of this >He takes off his shirt revealing his gigantic f------ moobs and starts swinging it around going "AUGH! AUGH! AUGHI AUGH! >He then throws the pizza right at this hot blonde girl behind us >He then freezes as if he's just realized what he's done >He then turms very red and farts f------ loudly >He starts crying >Tuns out he actually s--- himself as when his retard tamer was ushering him away watery s--- was sliding down his legs >mfw during this entire ordeal

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Sounds like he cut it close!

#50-ishallsmiteyou 01/03/2014) You guys are gonna love my story. >be grade 10 in woodshop class, working with a table saw >School has quite a large population of autistic kids, always causing trouble >Hear screaming and thumping outside, but dont pay much attention to it >suddenly door bursts open raptard roar completely drowns out sound of all machinery raptard immediately runs at me duck >he flies over me and onto the table saw >saw lops off a part of his skull >he gets carried away on a stretcher never heard from or seen again
#50-ishallsmiteyou 01/03/2014) You guys are gonna love my story. >be grade 10 in woodshop class, working with a table saw >School has quite a large population of autistic kids, always causing trouble >Hear screaming and thumping outside, but dont pay much attention to it >suddenly door bursts open raptard roar completely drowns out sound of all machinery raptard immediately runs at me duck >he flies over me and onto the table saw >saw lops off a part of his skull >he gets carried away on a stretcher never heard from or seen again

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Neal and Pil

□ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:28:07 No.392030503 Ok story story f neal. Sth gra >Be in AI class (it's like advanced s--- for smart kids) -The teachers decide it is a good idea for us to spend a day with the tard kids because we were ahead of schedule >I had never seen a tard previous to this encounter, so I didn't know what to expect >It seems to be a regular class room filled with ugly ass kids >Everybody is assigned their own personnel tard to talk to sI walk up to the tard and say Hello i'm phil I ge sOne fluent word, "haypil he says this whenever he is within thirty feet of me, and it becomes my only warning of the >Sit down and see he is cutting paper >Ask him what he's making >'what?" >The tard starts to make this screeching sound, the only thing I can compare it to is the sound of a f------ raptor >A fat downy tard runs up to us "STUOP ITTTT >Neal gets up and continues his raptard roar directly in her face >Downy tard goes batshit, engages tard strength and flips the entire table over Neal not only continues his tard roar but moves closer to downy child >Down kid just starts screaming and tries to run for the door, forgets to open it and smashes into it head first Neal silences his roar, sits down and continues cutting the paper as if nothing had happened Pg -Tardwranglers run in and retrieve Neal, and the downy child, they are both sent home And that my friends is the first of my many stories of neal. just tell me if you want more Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:47:37 No.392034629 After our first faithful encounter I hadn't seen Neal for a while, so this story takes place about 3 months after my story >Be walking down the hall with friends to lunch >Talking bout usual 5th grade s---, pokemon and what not >Hear a faint yet memorable voice >Don't answer, pretend I heard nothing due to the events of last time >Hear the sound yet again, except this time it is directly in my ear HAYPIL" He had just appeared on my side, he had to be atleast thirty or so feet in the other direction previoushy into play in I him "Hey Neal" (this s Wave >He extends a bag of cheetos he had in his hand in my direction "Wunt sum?" No thanks Neal" >My friend not knowing the kind of devastation Neal is capable of reaches over and grabs one of the cheetos out of >Neal looks up with pure >Oh f--- not again □ Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:48:08 No.392034761 raptard roard delibera >This one was in short bursts, it appears as if he has different roars for different situation >Friend says "what's wrong with him?" >Say nothing, as I do not want to feel Neals wrath >Friend backs away as Neal approaches chewing the cheeto >Neal lets out one last violent tard roar and hurls himself at my friend, knocking him over >He jams his hand into my friends mouth and retrieves the liquidy remnants of the cheeto while continuing his tard >Stands up and eats liquidy half eaten cheeto after silencing his roar >Tardwrangler comes speeding down hallway and grabs Neal by the wrist to pull him back to tardHQ >Waves at me "Buypil not a single ounce of regret or any emotion for that matter in his eyes wave at him in utter aw "Bye Neal" You Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:11:45 No.392040658 Neal Part 3: Battle of the Tards You see Neal mainly kept to him self, he did not like his tard kind. But he extremely dislike one tard name james, this is the first of their battles that I saw grade >New AI teacher is a very avid tard supporter >We are now going to help the tards out once a week for the entire year >I enter the tardHQ and see Neal in the corner >Hasn't grown an inch sense last year (turns out he will remain 5'0 for his entire life) >He looks as if he is in total concentration reading a book >I walk up to Neal "Hey bud whatcha reading toothy t >Sit next to him and look at the book SDr. Seuss a cat in the hat >I could tell he was a d--- from the first second I saw him snatches book out of neals hand >Tis buk is fur babbys v ut bac y yames >James holds it up above his head 'tak it suns Neal sounds his raptard screech >This is slightly different from his roar, it's soul effect is to piss off other tards >'Stup it nile tak yur dum buk late f Neal continues to approach with his fist above his head as far as he can reach con Crayons and s--- is being thrown, one tard is crawled into a ball in a puddle of piss >AI class is told to evacuate, I stay to watch imminent luls ears for dear life >He throws his mighty fist down into james nuts with the accumulative force of 1000 banhammers >James drops and begins to throw up on the "magic carpet Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:12:31 No.392040843 >Neal silences the screech, picks up the book james had stolen from him, and sits down to read it directly in james >butwhy jpg >He looks up at me with that toothy grin as I just stare >Tard wranglers bust in, one grabs me to bring me to safety, the others grab the debilitated james and Neal Neal screams after me I just watch as he is hulled off to the principles office, not giving a single bit of resistance >That day was known as N day up until I left for the highschool Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:32:49 No.392045038 Neal part 3 (someone archive this s--- please) Neal had been suspended for pulverizing James nuts >He's back now >I have started to look forward to our days helping the tards just because of Neal >Unfortunately it's not that day >Teacher says we have a tard coming to our class from now on cus the school has started new integration program Hello Neal" we said in unison as I waved Teacher lets him sit next to me cus he knows me James walks into class after him r.Jpg >James is introduced to class and is put at the same table as us just by luck We are starting water color painting right novw >Neal decides he wants to paint an apple, cus that's what I was painting James starts s--- with us because he's a d--- Neal ignores him because... well because he's f----- neal he doesn't give a f--- >James obviously angered by being ignored by me and Neal pours all of his paint onto my painting yur >Don't give a f---, but Neal sure as hell did >Commence raptard roar short burst mode (this is when I found out that short bursts means he's about to wreck s---) Neal throws all his paint right into james eyes as the class looks on in horror Cont. □ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:33:28 No.392045147 f--- this flood detection Stories of Neal cont James can't see s--- and Neal has not taken out skittles that I assume he had hid in the foreskin of his penis (I found out he's uncircumcised in a later incident) and begins pelting james with them >He's hurling these at mach 5 speeds into him James falls off of the stool he is sitting on and brings the girl sitting next to him along too Neal walks around the table, picks up the paint and slowly empties it onto both James and the girl (it is apparent that Neal does not give two s---- about civilian casualties) >The roar >Kids are all huddled into the comer aside from me, the two tards, and the poor girl caught in the mix >Teachers signals for tardwranglers waiting outside, james and Neal are picked up and taken from the classroom >Neal is in complete and utter peace while being carried away, he simply waves at me st And that was the end of the schools integration program after the girl who got wreckeds parents attempted to sue
□ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:28:07 No.392030503 Ok story story f neal. Sth gra >Be in AI class (it's like advanced s--- for smart kids) -The teachers decide it is a good idea for us to spend a day with the tard kids because we were ahead of schedule >I had never seen a tard previous to this encounter, so I didn't know what to expect >It seems to be a regular class room filled with ugly ass kids >Everybody is assigned their own personnel tard to talk to sI walk up to the tard and say Hello i'm phil I ge sOne fluent word, "haypil he says this whenever he is within thirty feet of me, and it becomes my only warning of the >Sit down and see he is cutting paper >Ask him what he's making >'what?" >The tard starts to make this screeching sound, the only thing I can compare it to is the sound of a f------ raptor >A fat downy tard runs up to us "STUOP ITTTT >Neal gets up and continues his raptard roar directly in her face >Downy tard goes batshit, engages tard strength and flips the entire table over Neal not only continues his tard roar but moves closer to downy child >Down kid just starts screaming and tries to run for the door, forgets to open it and smashes into it head first Neal silences his roar, sits down and continues cutting the paper as if nothing had happened Pg -Tardwranglers run in and retrieve Neal, and the downy child, they are both sent home And that my friends is the first of my many stories of neal. just tell me if you want more Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:47:37 No.392034629 After our first faithful encounter I hadn't seen Neal for a while, so this story takes place about 3 months after my story >Be walking down the hall with friends to lunch >Talking bout usual 5th grade s---, pokemon and what not >Hear a faint yet memorable voice >Don't answer, pretend I heard nothing due to the events of last time >Hear the sound yet again, except this time it is directly in my ear HAYPIL" He had just appeared on my side, he had to be atleast thirty or so feet in the other direction previoushy into play in I him "Hey Neal" (this s Wave >He extends a bag of cheetos he had in his hand in my direction "Wunt sum?" No thanks Neal" >My friend not knowing the kind of devastation Neal is capable of reaches over and grabs one of the cheetos out of >Neal looks up with pure >Oh f--- not again □ Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)21:48:08 No.392034761 raptard roard delibera >This one was in short bursts, it appears as if he has different roars for different situation >Friend says "what's wrong with him?" >Say nothing, as I do not want to feel Neals wrath >Friend backs away as Neal approaches chewing the cheeto >Neal lets out one last violent tard roar and hurls himself at my friend, knocking him over >He jams his hand into my friends mouth and retrieves the liquidy remnants of the cheeto while continuing his tard >Stands up and eats liquidy half eaten cheeto after silencing his roar >Tardwrangler comes speeding down hallway and grabs Neal by the wrist to pull him back to tardHQ >Waves at me "Buypil not a single ounce of regret or any emotion for that matter in his eyes wave at him in utter aw "Bye Neal" You Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:11:45 No.392040658 Neal Part 3: Battle of the Tards You see Neal mainly kept to him self, he did not like his tard kind. But he extremely dislike one tard name james, this is the first of their battles that I saw grade >New AI teacher is a very avid tard supporter >We are now going to help the tards out once a week for the entire year >I enter the tardHQ and see Neal in the corner >Hasn't grown an inch sense last year (turns out he will remain 5'0 for his entire life) >He looks as if he is in total concentration reading a book >I walk up to Neal "Hey bud whatcha reading toothy t >Sit next to him and look at the book SDr. Seuss a cat in the hat >I could tell he was a d--- from the first second I saw him snatches book out of neals hand >Tis buk is fur babbys v ut bac y yames >James holds it up above his head 'tak it suns Neal sounds his raptard screech >This is slightly different from his roar, it's soul effect is to piss off other tards >'Stup it nile tak yur dum buk late f Neal continues to approach with his fist above his head as far as he can reach con Crayons and s--- is being thrown, one tard is crawled into a ball in a puddle of piss >AI class is told to evacuate, I stay to watch imminent luls ears for dear life >He throws his mighty fist down into james nuts with the accumulative force of 1000 banhammers >James drops and begins to throw up on the "magic carpet Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:12:31 No.392040843 >Neal silences the screech, picks up the book james had stolen from him, and sits down to read it directly in james >butwhy jpg >He looks up at me with that toothy grin as I just stare >Tard wranglers bust in, one grabs me to bring me to safety, the others grab the debilitated james and Neal Neal screams after me I just watch as he is hulled off to the principles office, not giving a single bit of resistance >That day was known as N day up until I left for the highschool Anonymous (ID: ivudadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:32:49 No.392045038 Neal part 3 (someone archive this s--- please) Neal had been suspended for pulverizing James nuts >He's back now >I have started to look forward to our days helping the tards just because of Neal >Unfortunately it's not that day >Teacher says we have a tard coming to our class from now on cus the school has started new integration program Hello Neal" we said in unison as I waved Teacher lets him sit next to me cus he knows me James walks into class after him r.Jpg >James is introduced to class and is put at the same table as us just by luck We are starting water color painting right novw >Neal decides he wants to paint an apple, cus that's what I was painting James starts s--- with us because he's a d--- Neal ignores him because... well because he's f----- neal he doesn't give a f--- >James obviously angered by being ignored by me and Neal pours all of his paint onto my painting yur >Don't give a f---, but Neal sure as hell did >Commence raptard roar short burst mode (this is when I found out that short bursts means he's about to wreck s---) Neal throws all his paint right into james eyes as the class looks on in horror Cont. □ Anonymous (ID: ivUdadPA) 04/08/12(Sun)22:33:28 No.392045147 f--- this flood detection Stories of Neal cont James can't see s--- and Neal has not taken out skittles that I assume he had hid in the foreskin of his penis (I found out he's uncircumcised in a later incident) and begins pelting james with them >He's hurling these at mach 5 speeds into him James falls off of the stool he is sitting on and brings the girl sitting next to him along too Neal walks around the table, picks up the paint and slowly empties it onto both James and the girl (it is apparent that Neal does not give two s---- about civilian casualties) >The roar >Kids are all huddled into the comer aside from me, the two tards, and the poor girl caught in the mix >Teachers signals for tardwranglers waiting outside, james and Neal are picked up and taken from the classroom >Neal is in complete and utter peace while being carried away, he simply waves at me st And that was the end of the schools integration program after the girl who got wreckeds parents attempted to sue

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>OP has GF

■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:35:57 No.615136569 File: 1324947620270ipg (29 KB, 500x375) >2615136783 P> Some true OC for ya OP, tales from a britbong college... > Go to college, be seeing gf there (7/10, banged anyway) > College has special tard block for dealing with tards & to keep them away from non-tards however the canteen is shared > me + gfs lunch hours are a different times > she keeps telling me about this specific tard that keeps coming and sitting on her table at lunchtime > says nothing, stares at her, freaks her out > she complains to staff, nothing gets done > one day tard arrives, sits at table, staring > whips out c--- and starts hawin a wank > gf goes mental > "w-- you think you doing you f------ stupid spastic, are you retarded or what?" > punches him in face, staff arrive and break it up > she's hauled before the head of year > made to apologise to the tard for hitting him > gets a formal written warning for having called him "spastic and "retarded" when there were other spastic retards around to hear it.
■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:35:57 No.615136569 File: 1324947620270ipg (29 KB, 500x375) >2615136783 P> Some true OC for ya OP, tales from a britbong college... > Go to college, be seeing gf there (7/10, banged anyway) > College has special tard block for dealing with tards & to keep them away from non-tards however the canteen is shared > me + gfs lunch hours are a different times > she keeps telling me about this specific tard that keeps coming and sitting on her table at lunchtime > says nothing, stares at her, freaks her out > she complains to staff, nothing gets done > one day tard arrives, sits at table, staring > whips out c--- and starts hawin a wank > gf goes mental > "w-- you think you doing you f------ stupid spastic, are you retarded or what?" > punches him in face, staff arrive and break it up > she's hauled before the head of year > made to apologise to the tard for hitting him > gets a formal written warning for having called him "spastic and "retarded" when there were other spastic retards around to hear it.

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Home Ec, and toothpaste.

■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:01:50 No.615139931、 615140004 >Senior year in high school >accidentally put into home economics class, had to wait out >sit with a tard and three Mexican girls who mind their own business, speak Spanish to each other each day (it's Texas) >weird assignment, where one of us has to spoon-feed somebody with a blindfold and guess what it is >looks like mayonnaise, ranch dressing, toothpaste, etc >tard is the only one in group who wants to do the blindfold >Mexican girls don't want to feed him, so now I have to sl am now spoon-feeding a slobbering retard mayonnaise, trying not to vomit as he rolls it around in his blubbery cheeks, repeatedly guessing it wrong >eventually gives up, the toothpaste is next >have an idea to entertain myself >l feed him the toothpaste, his face puckers in disgust as he chews on toothpaste slowly, like it's some great culinary mystery >we all chuckle a bit, he gives up sl give him toothpaste again >doesn't notice it's the same, keeps chewing Pafter five spoons his mouth starts overflowing with toothpaste and slobber, he starts pushing out some with his tongue >my sides are burning with ashamed, suppressed laughter >Mexican girls are pissing themselves, can't even hold back >five minutes of this ohe's now overfowing with suds like a broken, menl challenged dishwasher >somehow, nobody else in room seeing this
■ Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)15:01:50 No.615139931、 615140004 >Senior year in high school >accidentally put into home economics class, had to wait out >sit with a tard and three Mexican girls who mind their own business, speak Spanish to each other each day (it's Texas) >weird assignment, where one of us has to spoon-feed somebody with a blindfold and guess what it is >looks like mayonnaise, ranch dressing, toothpaste, etc >tard is the only one in group who wants to do the blindfold >Mexican girls don't want to feed him, so now I have to sl am now spoon-feeding a slobbering retard mayonnaise, trying not to vomit as he rolls it around in his blubbery cheeks, repeatedly guessing it wrong >eventually gives up, the toothpaste is next >have an idea to entertain myself >l feed him the toothpaste, his face puckers in disgust as he chews on toothpaste slowly, like it's some great culinary mystery >we all chuckle a bit, he gives up sl give him toothpaste again >doesn't notice it's the same, keeps chewing Pafter five spoons his mouth starts overflowing with toothpaste and slobber, he starts pushing out some with his tongue >my sides are burning with ashamed, suppressed laughter >Mexican girls are pissing themselves, can't even hold back >five minutes of this ohe's now overfowing with suds like a broken, menl challenged dishwasher >somehow, nobody else in room seeing this

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Remington; alpha tard

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:51:03 No.6151 30557、22615130761 >my school was "progressive" and let the tards freely mingle with the normals >most of the tards were, well, tards >but one stood above the rest emington >The most alpha tard I've ever met, dude didn't give a single damn >l had swe were in art class, Remington kills the work, ask to use the class computer >Teach says veah, Remington goes on, nothing big >10 minutes pass, and suddenly, the class is filled with the sound of lusty moans every class with this he would do the most absurd things turn around, and see Remington watching hardcore hentai, in plain sight >everyone notices, no one says anything >how he got past the web filter, I don't know >finally, after what seemed like forever, the teacher asks him to please stop the video >Remington just looks back and asks "Why? > I bust out laughing, high five Remington, get yelled at for encouraging him. >Remington was my bro after that Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:52:45 No.6151307616151310342615131203 >Its lunch time, me and my circle are in the school courtyard >Remington usually is there first, but for some reason, he's late >eventually, he does show up, a little out of breath and in a fit of the giggles >l ask him what's up, he gets all serious >"Panties are real. >wat? > "Anon, panties are real." >he reaches into his pockets, and just pulls out two fistfulls of panties and shows me >"Real." >he laughs and runs off, throwing panties into the crowd, causing a panio stard wranglers rush to the scene, but Remington gave them the slip, disappearing into the crowd >l dont see him until 8th period and halfway through the class, wranglers show up and take him away Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:54:55 No.615131034 22615131889 615130761 time to take the PSATs >get to the testing rooms, guess who's here >Remington Alright, at the time, I didn't know you needed some kinda identification to take the test. I left mine at home >start to panic, crap, it's over, man >ask teach, says it's fine, I just gotta get another person to verify who I am when they call attendance >ask Remington, he says okay sthey start attendance, and get to my name >"Who can verify this is Anon?" >Remington stands up and booms >THAT IS ANON, MY FELLOW OTAKU IN ARMS, FIGHTING FOR HIS FUTURE TODAY" >everyone is quiet except me, because I'm laughing my a off "IS MY WORD ENOUGH TO IDENTIFY MY COMRADE?" steacher is shaken, just replies with a soft "y-yes." "AFFIRMATIVE! PLEASE PROCEED, SENSEI steach tries to continue, Remington shoots me a thumbs up and wink. Could barely finish my test, was too busy holding my sides together Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:01:11 No.615131889 2-615132802 Ps Pin swe're supposed to be doing laps, but teach doesn't give a damn, lets us do whatever. >I'm hanging out with Remington and a few of my bros in the shade, watching the girls play tennis >out of nowhere, Remington says, "I wanna play tennis." >l try to convince him he cant, the girls are playing, they dont want us there, etc >Remington is having none of it, he just walks to the court >5 minutes later, he comes back. >They won't let you play, huh? >They said I need a partner, but no one wants to partner with me." >he said it in a completely flat voice like normal, but I felt for the dude >"Hey, Remington, I'll be your partner >"Reallv, anon?" Just a note, I had absolutely no idea how to play Tennis, but I couldn't leave my tard buddy hanging >we walk to the court, and all eyes are on us sthe coach obviously told him he needed a partner as an excuse to let him not play mean, who would partner with a tard? >anyway, we get set up with the gear, and get in position, they let us serve, cuz tard >Remington serves the ball with the force of a thousand Sunny D's, gets us our first point >he single-handedly destroys them, me being a partner only in name safterwards, they demand a rematch, but Remington brushes them off, says he's bored >he spends the rest of PE drawing in the dirt with a stick and talking about WWIl Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:08:13 No.615132802 >2615133327 >>615133334 >-615140280 615131889 >its lunchtime, Remington is where we usually meet, only this time, someone's with him. >it's this chick with huge bazongas "Anon, meet ma woman." >she waves and says hi, voice gives her away for total mental tard, just gutter noise >everyone show up, Remington introduces her to everyone, everything is normal FF 20 minutes >we're done eating, just talking, and I notice Remington kissing his girl >l decide to cheer him on as a joke, boost his confidence instead >my friends join in, cheer him on as wel >That's when he started to hit second base and put his hand down her pants lolwut >everyone is quiet now, but Remington keeps going and pulls out her t--- >won't lie, pretty nice t--- for a tard >at this point, a small crowd has shown up, and is just losing it >Remington decides fak it" and whips out his dong and just starts stroking >did I forget to mention that his tard queen is just making noises like she's in heat this entire time? stard wranglers hit the scene, but Remington will not be denied >he fights them with his tard strength, lays out one dude >eventually, they take him down, and drag him away, still erect
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:51:03 No.6151 30557、22615130761 >my school was "progressive" and let the tards freely mingle with the normals >most of the tards were, well, tards >but one stood above the rest emington >The most alpha tard I've ever met, dude didn't give a single damn >l had swe were in art class, Remington kills the work, ask to use the class computer >Teach says veah, Remington goes on, nothing big >10 minutes pass, and suddenly, the class is filled with the sound of lusty moans every class with this he would do the most absurd things turn around, and see Remington watching hardcore hentai, in plain sight >everyone notices, no one says anything >how he got past the web filter, I don't know >finally, after what seemed like forever, the teacher asks him to please stop the video >Remington just looks back and asks "Why? > I bust out laughing, high five Remington, get yelled at for encouraging him. >Remington was my bro after that Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:52:45 No.6151307616151310342615131203 >Its lunch time, me and my circle are in the school courtyard >Remington usually is there first, but for some reason, he's late >eventually, he does show up, a little out of breath and in a fit of the giggles >l ask him what's up, he gets all serious >"Panties are real. >wat? > "Anon, panties are real." >he reaches into his pockets, and just pulls out two fistfulls of panties and shows me >"Real." >he laughs and runs off, throwing panties into the crowd, causing a panio stard wranglers rush to the scene, but Remington gave them the slip, disappearing into the crowd >l dont see him until 8th period and halfway through the class, wranglers show up and take him away Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:54:55 No.615131034 22615131889 615130761 time to take the PSATs >get to the testing rooms, guess who's here >Remington Alright, at the time, I didn't know you needed some kinda identification to take the test. I left mine at home >start to panic, crap, it's over, man >ask teach, says it's fine, I just gotta get another person to verify who I am when they call attendance >ask Remington, he says okay sthey start attendance, and get to my name >"Who can verify this is Anon?" >Remington stands up and booms >THAT IS ANON, MY FELLOW OTAKU IN ARMS, FIGHTING FOR HIS FUTURE TODAY" >everyone is quiet except me, because I'm laughing my a off "IS MY WORD ENOUGH TO IDENTIFY MY COMRADE?" steacher is shaken, just replies with a soft "y-yes." "AFFIRMATIVE! PLEASE PROCEED, SENSEI steach tries to continue, Remington shoots me a thumbs up and wink. Could barely finish my test, was too busy holding my sides together Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:01:11 No.615131889 2-615132802 Ps Pin swe're supposed to be doing laps, but teach doesn't give a damn, lets us do whatever. >I'm hanging out with Remington and a few of my bros in the shade, watching the girls play tennis >out of nowhere, Remington says, "I wanna play tennis." >l try to convince him he cant, the girls are playing, they dont want us there, etc >Remington is having none of it, he just walks to the court >5 minutes later, he comes back. >They won't let you play, huh? >They said I need a partner, but no one wants to partner with me." >he said it in a completely flat voice like normal, but I felt for the dude >"Hey, Remington, I'll be your partner >"Reallv, anon?" Just a note, I had absolutely no idea how to play Tennis, but I couldn't leave my tard buddy hanging >we walk to the court, and all eyes are on us sthe coach obviously told him he needed a partner as an excuse to let him not play mean, who would partner with a tard? >anyway, we get set up with the gear, and get in position, they let us serve, cuz tard >Remington serves the ball with the force of a thousand Sunny D's, gets us our first point >he single-handedly destroys them, me being a partner only in name safterwards, they demand a rematch, but Remington brushes them off, says he's bored >he spends the rest of PE drawing in the dirt with a stick and talking about WWIl Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:08:13 No.615132802 >2615133327 >>615133334 >-615140280 615131889 >its lunchtime, Remington is where we usually meet, only this time, someone's with him. >it's this chick with huge bazongas "Anon, meet ma woman." >she waves and says hi, voice gives her away for total mental tard, just gutter noise >everyone show up, Remington introduces her to everyone, everything is normal FF 20 minutes >we're done eating, just talking, and I notice Remington kissing his girl >l decide to cheer him on as a joke, boost his confidence instead >my friends join in, cheer him on as wel >That's when he started to hit second base and put his hand down her pants lolwut >everyone is quiet now, but Remington keeps going and pulls out her t--- >won't lie, pretty nice t--- for a tard >at this point, a small crowd has shown up, and is just losing it >Remington decides fak it" and whips out his dong and just starts stroking >did I forget to mention that his tard queen is just making noises like she's in heat this entire time? stard wranglers hit the scene, but Remington will not be denied >he fights them with his tard strength, lays out one dude >eventually, they take him down, and drag him away, still erect

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Triggering you a second time today

Hello, v! I posted about this problem of mine last night. Unfortunately, most of what I got were troll comments or people getting angry over silly things Anyway, here's my dilemma.. .I'm a hardcore gamer. I love videogames. They're important to me. If Im not working, then Im probably playing videogames. So, it's only natural that this would be a real selling point for any potential relationship interest. My boyfriend is a horrible casual gamer. He owns no HD consoles and refuses to play anything that isn't old-as-dirt, horribly gimmicky, or just retro/hipster kiddy garbage. He has a Wii, a PS2, a Nintendo DS, and a heaping mountain of old stuff he's packratted from the 80's and 90's..or, he DID have those things I finally followed my own advice. He's been off visiting his family because of some accident his sister had for the past few days and he's due home tonight. While he's been away, I've taken the liberty of selling a ton of the stuff he could never bring hmself to part with and buying him something actually worth his time ノ I was quick to find a buyer. A local pawn shop eats things like this up, so they were happy to have me as a seller. Here's what my transactions have been like I sold An NES + all of his NES cartridges, SNES + cartridges, Genesis + Cartridges, Genesis + games, Dreamcast (Didn't sell the games though. They were all burned onto disc, so they wouldn't take them), Virtual Boy single game (Wario), PS2 + a f------ MOUNTAIN of old PS2 and PS1 games, and his Wii + all Wii and Gamecube titles. I didn't sell the DS. .but that's only because he took it on the trip with him. All in all, the consoles over 100 combined games netted me about 500 dollars >Gr, field too long, cont'd Anonymous 05/20/10 (Thu)22:39 No.59824016 >59823984 Cont'd As a surprise when he gets back, I bought him a new 250 GB PS3! Yeah yeah, 'nogaems'...but it makes sense. I own a 360, after all.so now we can share everything, since he finally has something worthwhile I was planning to get him FFXIII and Modern Warfare 2 .but since I have those already, I decided to stick to exclusives or things I don't already own. Before he left, I subtly asked him if he'd ever play any PS3 games at all. He said he was actually interested in 3D Dot Game Heroes, so I got him that. Seems kinda 'hipster-y', but it's a start. On top of that, I also got him MAG. He doesn't seem to like FPS games, but he'll get used to them. Anyway, I set everything up in the living room. He should be back within the hour. You think he'll like it and finally start to appreciate gaming as a modern form of entertainment?
Hello, v! I posted about this problem of mine last night. Unfortunately, most of what I got were troll comments or people getting angry over silly things Anyway, here's my dilemma.. .I'm a hardcore gamer. I love videogames. They're important to me. If Im not working, then Im probably playing videogames. So, it's only natural that this would be a real selling point for any potential relationship interest. My boyfriend is a horrible casual gamer. He owns no HD consoles and refuses to play anything that isn't old-as-dirt, horribly gimmicky, or just retro/hipster kiddy garbage. He has a Wii, a PS2, a Nintendo DS, and a heaping mountain of old stuff he's packratted from the 80's and 90's..or, he DID have those things I finally followed my own advice. He's been off visiting his family because of some accident his sister had for the past few days and he's due home tonight. While he's been away, I've taken the liberty of selling a ton of the stuff he could never bring hmself to part with and buying him something actually worth his time ノ I was quick to find a buyer. A local pawn shop eats things like this up, so they were happy to have me as a seller. Here's what my transactions have been like I sold An NES + all of his NES cartridges, SNES + cartridges, Genesis + Cartridges, Genesis + games, Dreamcast (Didn't sell the games though. They were all burned onto disc, so they wouldn't take them), Virtual Boy single game (Wario), PS2 + a f------ MOUNTAIN of old PS2 and PS1 games, and his Wii + all Wii and Gamecube titles. I didn't sell the DS. .but that's only because he took it on the trip with him. All in all, the consoles over 100 combined games netted me about 500 dollars >Gr, field too long, cont'd Anonymous 05/20/10 (Thu)22:39 No.59824016 >59823984 Cont'd As a surprise when he gets back, I bought him a new 250 GB PS3! Yeah yeah, 'nogaems'...but it makes sense. I own a 360, after all.so now we can share everything, since he finally has something worthwhile I was planning to get him FFXIII and Modern Warfare 2 .but since I have those already, I decided to stick to exclusives or things I don't already own. Before he left, I subtly asked him if he'd ever play any PS3 games at all. He said he was actually interested in 3D Dot Game Heroes, so I got him that. Seems kinda 'hipster-y', but it's a start. On top of that, I also got him MAG. He doesn't seem to like FPS games, but he'll get used to them. Anyway, I set everything up in the living room. He should be back within the hour. You think he'll like it and finally start to appreciate gaming as a modern form of entertainment?

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4chan videogames selling console girlfriend boyfriend trolling guaranteed replies

You will get triggered by this

□ Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:32:56 No.3420448 >"Son, your the games you are buying are viruses! You need to remove them >"But Mom! My Sister has Napster and Limewire installed on the computer, and she constantly downloads viruses disguised as music! I bought these games from Best Buy, they are not infected with anything!" >"No anon, Music cannot have viruses, only games can. She took the computer to Best Buy, and the employees told her the same thing after they fixed it. She ignored them and just banned me from using the family computer for two years, because my Mom always needs someone to blame except for my sister I eventually saved up enough money to buy a near-mint condition Thinkpad, that had a broken Windows installation. I just installed Debian (Linux distro) and called it a day Replies to this post: □ Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:33:34 No. 3420456 。 3420448 CONT >Sister continues to use Limewire to download viruses, since she cannot tell the difference between a 5kb exe and a 5mb mp3 >WhileI am at school (she is supposedly sick), she takes my laptop and tries to use it for her various online activities, and quickly discovers it is impossible to install Windows programs natively on it >She talks to my Mom and tells her that I broke my computer, and that I was probably too embarrassed to fix it >They go to Best Buy and have a fellow install Windows on it, along with every junk program on this side of the galaxy >They wiped all of school assignments and notes in the process, even the ones I was working on, AND EVEN THE F------ FAT16 PARTITION THAT WAS NAMED "BACKUP DO NOT WIPE" >By the time I arrive home my sister has managed to f--- it up with more viruses than a two-bit w---- >My Mom tells me that the laptop is now my sister's property, since "I cannot be trusted with computers" >"But Mom, I bought it with my own money from the jobs I did last Summer. Whether I can use it 'well' is irrelevant" >She tells me that if it wasn't for her status as a local pharmacist I would have never had the jobs, so it was her money anyway >mfw only half the people I worked for knew her name And that /r9kf, is how I became known as the computer illiterate of my family 2 Icon Replies to this post: 505 > 828 >> 743 > 413 3 □ Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:42:26 No. 3420529 g。 Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:51:50 No.3420598 Q File: 1344955346244.jpg-(8 KB, 259x194, 1344309378480.jpg) I TM BEYOND MAD Lt >>3420456 P> P> Why didn't you just take it back and put a lock on it you f------ p---- 10/10 I got so f------ mad P> I did, though I locked it in a locked chest instead of putting a lock on it Of course my Sister though a hissy-fit, and my Mom responded by taking some of my CDs to "see how I feel when someone takes my stuff." They somehow ended up broken (including a backup disk of my sisters data), but I still refused to hand over my laptop because f--- the police, I value my computer more than any other of my possessions (besides memorabilia) 2043 My Mom just called a locksmith and got the computer out of the chest and gave it back to my sister, who raged because I had reinstalled debian and apparently deleted her information without backing it up. Being the calm, cool, rational being she was, she through the laptop outside during her fit of rage, and it fell in a puddle while running Replies to this post: I did not mention it earlier because this part is just retarded, not entertaining in the least
□ Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:32:56 No.3420448 >"Son, your the games you are buying are viruses! You need to remove them >"But Mom! My Sister has Napster and Limewire installed on the computer, and she constantly downloads viruses disguised as music! I bought these games from Best Buy, they are not infected with anything!" >"No anon, Music cannot have viruses, only games can. She took the computer to Best Buy, and the employees told her the same thing after they fixed it. She ignored them and just banned me from using the family computer for two years, because my Mom always needs someone to blame except for my sister I eventually saved up enough money to buy a near-mint condition Thinkpad, that had a broken Windows installation. I just installed Debian (Linux distro) and called it a day Replies to this post: □ Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:33:34 No. 3420456 。 3420448 CONT >Sister continues to use Limewire to download viruses, since she cannot tell the difference between a 5kb exe and a 5mb mp3 >WhileI am at school (she is supposedly sick), she takes my laptop and tries to use it for her various online activities, and quickly discovers it is impossible to install Windows programs natively on it >She talks to my Mom and tells her that I broke my computer, and that I was probably too embarrassed to fix it >They go to Best Buy and have a fellow install Windows on it, along with every junk program on this side of the galaxy >They wiped all of school assignments and notes in the process, even the ones I was working on, AND EVEN THE F------ FAT16 PARTITION THAT WAS NAMED "BACKUP DO NOT WIPE" >By the time I arrive home my sister has managed to f--- it up with more viruses than a two-bit w---- >My Mom tells me that the laptop is now my sister's property, since "I cannot be trusted with computers" >"But Mom, I bought it with my own money from the jobs I did last Summer. Whether I can use it 'well' is irrelevant" >She tells me that if it wasn't for her status as a local pharmacist I would have never had the jobs, so it was her money anyway >mfw only half the people I worked for knew her name And that /r9kf, is how I became known as the computer illiterate of my family 2 Icon Replies to this post: 505 > 828 >> 743 > 413 3 □ Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:42:26 No. 3420529 g。 Anonymous 08/14/12(Tue)10:51:50 No.3420598 Q File: 1344955346244.jpg-(8 KB, 259x194, 1344309378480.jpg) I TM BEYOND MAD Lt >>3420456 P> P> Why didn't you just take it back and put a lock on it you f------ p---- 10/10 I got so f------ mad P> I did, though I locked it in a locked chest instead of putting a lock on it Of course my Sister though a hissy-fit, and my Mom responded by taking some of my CDs to "see how I feel when someone takes my stuff." They somehow ended up broken (including a backup disk of my sisters data), but I still refused to hand over my laptop because f--- the police, I value my computer more than any other of my possessions (besides memorabilia) 2043 My Mom just called a locksmith and got the computer out of the chest and gave it back to my sister, who raged because I had reinstalled debian and apparently deleted her information without backing it up. Being the calm, cool, rational being she was, she through the laptop outside during her fit of rage, and it fell in a puddle while running Replies to this post: I did not mention it earlier because this part is just retarded, not entertaining in the least

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green text 4chan computer laptop bitch mom please do not be real

Sir Bearington

Anonymous 09/25/11 (Sun)23:15 No.16426614 File1317006946.ipg-(96 KB, 634x456, sir bearington.jpg) >Make a bear character in D&D 3.5 >DM laughs >Make bear a rogue, put every point I can into disguise >Prestige class as a spy to get more disguise >DM says I can't speak english >Max out bluff >By growling and gesturing, I can fake speaking a language I don't speak (english) >use money to hire a butler NPC >Give him magical item to let him speak bear "GROWwwWWL" "An excellent suggestion, Mister Bearington. We really should ask the group to investigate the Black Marsh >Over the course of the game, be knighted as Sir Bearington >Queen holds a dinner in my honor >A guest becomes the first man to ever make a perception check that can beat my disguise >Shouts out loud "HEY, THAT GUY'S NOT A GUY, HE'S JUST A BEAR!" >Man is escorted out of the castle while the guards apologise profusely for the indignity "We're so sorry, Sir Bearington, very sorry for this man's behavior" ROAR *shrug
Anonymous 09/25/11 (Sun)23:15 No.16426614 File1317006946.ipg-(96 KB, 634x456, sir bearington.jpg) >Make a bear character in D&D 3.5 >DM laughs >Make bear a rogue, put every point I can into disguise >Prestige class as a spy to get more disguise >DM says I can't speak english >Max out bluff >By growling and gesturing, I can fake speaking a language I don't speak (english) >use money to hire a butler NPC >Give him magical item to let him speak bear "GROWwwWWL" "An excellent suggestion, Mister Bearington. We really should ask the group to investigate the Black Marsh >Over the course of the game, be knighted as Sir Bearington >Queen holds a dinner in my honor >A guest becomes the first man to ever make a perception check that can beat my disguise >Shouts out loud "HEY, THAT GUY'S NOT A GUY, HE'S JUST A BEAR!" >Man is escorted out of the castle while the guards apologise profusely for the indignity "We're so sorry, Sir Bearington, very sorry for this man's behavior" ROAR *shrug

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bear d&d 3.5

Good guy anon

Anonymous 05/22/16(Fri)19:47:07 No.295419598 File: 1431913639800 pna (125 KB, 735x422) >2295419967 >>2954205032229542109822295424073 tfw almost every single one of my friends has some form of depression >I'm basically the chipper, optimistic voice of reason Help O Anonymous 05/22/15(Fri)20:09:04 No.29542 1669 File: 1395540699344.pna (166 KB, 264x314) >>295422083>>295422 153>>295422284>>295424089>-295424460>>295424806 >>295425090>>295425797 >>295426347 >295419967 >29542050 >295421098 I'm surprisingly good at it, but f--- me does it get nerve-wracking One girl was regularly molested/abused by her dad and will become pretty unstable at random intervals and can even be driven frighteningly close to suicide. She's trying to get out of the house (she turned 18 recently) and/or report her dad but there's no solid evidence for a case Another girl was undergoing severe depression and even induced DID. However, it seems that me being with her much more than before plus her having a psychiatrist has vastly improved her state and even practically phased out her DID. She used to cut quite a bit but I got her to stop doing that. We're basically in this not-set-in-stone romantic relationship and I occasionally give her scars a light kiss, which is cheesy as f--- but it honestly makes her extremely happy to have me around One friend has hereditary depression that causes him to become randomly lethargic/apathetic at random intervals, but I seem to be able to lift his spirits 90% of the time Another friend is like the last one, but it isn't hereditary. He's been on a slippery slope for a few years but a new girlfriend is helping in alleviating his general apathy a bit There's a few more but they're rather mundane and not too bad. They're more of a general stress case rather than diagnosed depression Overall, it's nice that I can help them and basically act as a real-life Makoto Naegi but it does get very f------ scary at times, especially with suicide threats where I need to race over (literally so, as ) in order to stop them and be by their side
Anonymous 05/22/16(Fri)19:47:07 No.295419598 File: 1431913639800 pna (125 KB, 735x422) >2295419967 >>2954205032229542109822295424073 tfw almost every single one of my friends has some form of depression >I'm basically the chipper, optimistic voice of reason Help O Anonymous 05/22/15(Fri)20:09:04 No.29542 1669 File: 1395540699344.pna (166 KB, 264x314) >>295422083>>295422 153>>295422284>>295424089>-295424460>>295424806 >>295425090>>295425797 >>295426347 >295419967 >29542050 >295421098 I'm surprisingly good at it, but f--- me does it get nerve-wracking One girl was regularly molested/abused by her dad and will become pretty unstable at random intervals and can even be driven frighteningly close to suicide. She's trying to get out of the house (she turned 18 recently) and/or report her dad but there's no solid evidence for a case Another girl was undergoing severe depression and even induced DID. However, it seems that me being with her much more than before plus her having a psychiatrist has vastly improved her state and even practically phased out her DID. She used to cut quite a bit but I got her to stop doing that. We're basically in this not-set-in-stone romantic relationship and I occasionally give her scars a light kiss, which is cheesy as f--- but it honestly makes her extremely happy to have me around One friend has hereditary depression that causes him to become randomly lethargic/apathetic at random intervals, but I seem to be able to lift his spirits 90% of the time Another friend is like the last one, but it isn't hereditary. He's been on a slippery slope for a few years but a new girlfriend is helping in alleviating his general apathy a bit There's a few more but they're rather mundane and not too bad. They're more of a general stress case rather than diagnosed depression Overall, it's nice that I can help them and basically act as a real-life Makoto Naegi but it does get very f------ scary at times, especially with suicide threats where I need to race over (literally so, as ) in order to stop them and be by their side

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depression good guy

Could never finish the game

Anonymous 09/20/14 (Sat)07:28:34 No.264507894 264508048 264508142 2264508217 2645083612264523817 Posted this before, but what the f--- >Christmas when I was 9 Friend has cancer >Get super nintendo I've been wanting >Don't wanna celebrate, don't wanna play Mom cries >Dad's angry, "we're taking that down to the church now" blah blah >Ask if we can give it to my friend because he's sick >Both realize why I sound so ungrateful >"Son you sure about this? I'm not mad, I understand why you're sad, we can talk-" >"No, he won't be getting anything for Christmas." We hauled that s--- down to the hospital, set it up, and he got to play Link to the past from his bed I remember asking dad, after he talked to my friend's parents, when my friend was going to get better He looked at me with the kind of same serious look he got whenever I did something wrong or something bad had happened ...he's not, son." 9> Anonymous 09/20/14(Sat)07:33:22 No.264508361 264508738 264509119264512067 264522762 Confused Angry Sad >"No dad you don't get it, this is my bro." >"All they can do is make him comfortable." >Take me to IHOP, tell me what a good kid I am l cry so badly I can't eat. Two months later, he dies Remember screaming at cross in church "ONE TIME! THAT'S ALL I ASKEDI ONE TIME! >Break two fingers in hand from punching a wall >After the funeral, his parents gave me the super nintendo >"He'd want you to have it." >Start to play it, days later >He named the hero after me And that's why I could never finish that game, v
Anonymous 09/20/14 (Sat)07:28:34 No.264507894 264508048 264508142 2264508217 2645083612264523817 Posted this before, but what the f--- >Christmas when I was 9 Friend has cancer >Get super nintendo I've been wanting >Don't wanna celebrate, don't wanna play Mom cries >Dad's angry, "we're taking that down to the church now" blah blah >Ask if we can give it to my friend because he's sick >Both realize why I sound so ungrateful >"Son you sure about this? I'm not mad, I understand why you're sad, we can talk-" >"No, he won't be getting anything for Christmas." We hauled that s--- down to the hospital, set it up, and he got to play Link to the past from his bed I remember asking dad, after he talked to my friend's parents, when my friend was going to get better He looked at me with the kind of same serious look he got whenever I did something wrong or something bad had happened ...he's not, son." 9> Anonymous 09/20/14(Sat)07:33:22 No.264508361 264508738 264509119264512067 264522762 Confused Angry Sad >"No dad you don't get it, this is my bro." >"All they can do is make him comfortable." >Take me to IHOP, tell me what a good kid I am l cry so badly I can't eat. Two months later, he dies Remember screaming at cross in church "ONE TIME! THAT'S ALL I ASKEDI ONE TIME! >Break two fingers in hand from punching a wall >After the funeral, his parents gave me the super nintendo >"He'd want you to have it." >Start to play it, days later >He named the hero after me And that's why I could never finish that game, v

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green text link to the past cancer best friend church

911 anon (contains feels)

This was one of my first calls Contrary to common belief only 10% of the calls wo get weekly are actual emergencies. diot >"We have just dispatched an ambulance towards your location Stay away from the dog. Anonymous 0D kvocFcJl) 042 14(Mon)17:55:30 No 54330276 9 _mmsa usaeesmaasaname溢 Her mom was moaning the lttle girl assumed the locked door meant her dad was hitting his wife And here's why most of the people I wark along side af are on antidepressants and why >Wy baby felin the poor was the frst thing I made out through the heaving Can hear the mother screaming how she only took her eyes off the baby for a minute l was on the phone until the ambulance called telling me the baby was long gone I'm trying to balance the funny and sad stories but I guess there's more tragic than happy she took deep breaths before spealing, she was obviously in a lot of pain She tried to break the fall with her arms and she obviously sounded like they were broken Was seeing double and her nose was bleeding with no direct impact to the nose She was a trooper and she was taking it wall for someone who had fell from such a high spot kept stalling her with comersations about school and tends while her repies got slower and slower She sounded ike such a good ucking person and it's temible getting this emotionally investesd -The fact that I was the last one to talk to her f----- me up r---- her (absolutely destroying her hymmen in the process, she said she was experiencing heavy bleeding the words she was saying ike "r---" and "choking sounded ridiculously foreign on her innocent voice -She's heathy and well right now How no one heard her scream will always be a mystery to ma >Tm too scared to die" was what he kept whispering every time he'd stop throwing up tells me about how ashamed his daughter would be if she saw him ike this Last I heard was the sound of him groaning while the paramedics put him on the stretcher Had to make a ittle 7 year old check whether his sister was alive or dead -l told him to put his hand over her mouth and nose to feel whether air is coming in or not >He ranted for about an hour about how walmart doesnt sell his favourite kind of beer Ambulance came home to find the littl kid snuggled beside her with a blanket wrapped around both of them
This was one of my first calls Contrary to common belief only 10% of the calls wo get weekly are actual emergencies. diot >"We have just dispatched an ambulance towards your location Stay away from the dog. Anonymous 0D kvocFcJl) 042 14(Mon)17:55:30 No 54330276 9 _mmsa usaeesmaasaname溢 Her mom was moaning the lttle girl assumed the locked door meant her dad was hitting his wife And here's why most of the people I wark along side af are on antidepressants and why >Wy baby felin the poor was the frst thing I made out through the heaving Can hear the mother screaming how she only took her eyes off the baby for a minute l was on the phone until the ambulance called telling me the baby was long gone I'm trying to balance the funny and sad stories but I guess there's more tragic than happy she took deep breaths before spealing, she was obviously in a lot of pain She tried to break the fall with her arms and she obviously sounded like they were broken Was seeing double and her nose was bleeding with no direct impact to the nose She was a trooper and she was taking it wall for someone who had fell from such a high spot kept stalling her with comersations about school and tends while her repies got slower and slower She sounded ike such a good ucking person and it's temible getting this emotionally investesd -The fact that I was the last one to talk to her f----- me up r---- her (absolutely destroying her hymmen in the process, she said she was experiencing heavy bleeding the words she was saying ike "r---" and "choking sounded ridiculously foreign on her innocent voice -She's heathy and well right now How no one heard her scream will always be a mystery to ma >Tm too scared to die" was what he kept whispering every time he'd stop throwing up tells me about how ashamed his daughter would be if she saw him ike this Last I heard was the sound of him groaning while the paramedics put him on the stretcher Had to make a ittle 7 year old check whether his sister was alive or dead -l told him to put his hand over her mouth and nose to feel whether air is coming in or not >He ranted for about an hour about how walmart doesnt sell his favourite kind of beer Ambulance came home to find the littl kid snuggled beside her with a blanket wrapped around both of them

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green text anon 911

A stepdad and his daughter

Anonymous ID Pv4IPfyB) 04/22/14 Tue 07:54:12 14(Tue)07:54:12 No.543366393 ー54336686022543366862 2543366875 >7543367621 >>543367647 2543367691 >2543379887 >543383772 (162 KB, 1272x1161) I've posted my story before and ill post it again because it was a sweet victory over feminazis >Couple years ago >My day off so I can do whatever the hell I want and baby girl doesnt have school Be me taking my step daughter to a local park She was 8 at the time of the Incident >Walk into the park with her and majority of the park are moms and a couple guys but women out number us >Alright sweetie Ⅲ be right here my love go play "KAY!I >Just texting my wife while Amy plays but I'm noticing all these women giving me dirty looks >Occasionally Amy will come up to me and kiss me and say I love you daddy stepped into her life when she was only a year old >Her dad and me get along but he walked out on her because he has severe mental problems from Iraq and I don't blame him but hes a good guy but he feels she wouldn't be safe if he were to snap An hour later I see this woman pulling my daughter aside and tugging at her with a follow me" gesture HEY WHAT THE HELL!?!? GE >Get tackled by 2 white knight males and they restrain me >Ow... what the f---!? GET THE F--- >Punched and kicked "SHUT THE F--- UP P-------- WERE MAKING A CITIZENS ARREST WHAT!?!? GET THE F--- OFF ME THATS MY >Punch again "I SAID SHUT THE F--- UP!!" >Step daughter screaming and hollering telling them to leave me alone "DADDY!!! SAVE ME THEYRE TRYING TO TAKE ME!!! BABY HANG ON DADDY WILL SAVE YOU- "DONT TALK TO HER P--------!!" >Women are scorning me and calling me a grooming sex offender >Can overhear some of them trying to calm her down >"sweetie did he touch you!?" "SWEETIE CALM DOWN YOURE SAFE! he groomed her" >Step daughter is extremely distraught and screaming top of her lungs and crying like a 2 year old and they're trying to put her into a soccer mom van >GET THE F--- OFF ME BABY DADDY WILL SAVE >This time I get pepper sprayed by one of the moms because I'm a Threat to the children T YOUR HANDS OFF- WERE GET THE FUDK OFF NEOKUIS "lt looks like □ Anonymous (ID: Pv4IPfyB) 04/22/14(Tue)08:05:00 No.543367647 543367882 >>543369275 >2543379887 >>543383772 543366393 >Police finally arrive because step daughters screams can be heard for miles >Police arrest me and don't listen to my story pretty much take the feminazis side and white knights IM GONNA SUE EVERY F------ SINGLE ONE OF YOU F--- YOU ALL YOU'RE ALL F----- >Crowd appears and pretty much cheering "P-------- ARRESTED" >However the white knights are arrested too because they did assault me >Couple minutes later I'm in an interrogation room by myself >End up making phone call to wife to come help me out and explain to these idiots that I'm Amy's step dad and all that b------- >Couple hours go by in complete silence and then I can hear my wife screaming top of her lungs calling the PD a bunch of dumb pigs for arresting her husband and shes gonna sue the department for their poor handling of the situation >She bursts through the door and just breaks down crying see my puffed red eyes and cuts and bruises >Behind her is the Captain and 3 detectives including social worker >"Mr. Von Anon On behalf the chief we are deeply sorry for how the situation was handled- >OH SHUT THE F--- UP IM SUING ALL OF YOU, F--- YOU! >One of the female detectives steps in "Hey watch your mouth it was mis communication- I DONT GIVE TWO F---- YOU ARRESTED ME BASED ON THOSE DUMB BITCHES WORD F--- YOU!!! ME A CHANCE TO DEFEND MYSELF YOU GUYS JUST ARRESTED ME ON SIGHT PRETTY MUCH "SIR YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN WE ARE LAW ENFORCEMENT F--- YOUI! >Captain steps in "Ok ok ok I realize how angry you are Mr.Von Anon and tell you what so we can avoid this legal matter we will testify in your defense and have a judge clear you of any wrong doings in your past" >Clear my DUl and you got a deal all hat bulshit cing sten wife screaming top of her unny YOU DIDNT GIVE >Find out later women in the park are part of some feminist group from my lawyer and he ends up serving them including the white knights almost immediately Cont'd ending 543366860 Sorry I just seen this thread and well yeah Anonymous (ID: Pv4IPfyB) 04/22/14(Tue)08:18:20 No.543369275543369551 543370495543370553543370598 543371512 >543373390 543375674 >543375974543376029543376489543379319 543379887 32543382434 543382505 543367647 >Couple months go by and step daughter becomes is traumatized having nightmares of being kidnapped by strange women rares df Shes so paranoid of being alone with women now especially her friends moms >Pi isses the bed every so often >Have psych evaluate her so l can use it in court and pysch even agrees to testify for me >Finally after about 4 months get a court date >Come into court and theres the feminazis and white knights >This is gonna be a clear cut >Police testify and even one of the white knights turns on the feminazis trying to cover his ass BUT OH NO I'm suing you too jackass >Feminazis claim they were in the right because they believed I was doing sexual gestures and actions to my step daughter >Psych takes stand and says she questioned my step daughter did tests and said that I never molested her and clearly those women are deranged and hopped up on emotions Judge doesnt wong and demhild is traumatizeat I never molested her Sentences white knights to 6 months for assaulting me up Says that because of what those women did my child i umatized and the damage is pretty bad may take years for rehabilitation years for rehablitation >Women say that my pysch is wrong and demand a 2nd opinion still hold onto the hes a p--------" defense >Judge doesnt want to hear anymore of it >And out of it me and my wife get a total of 200 thousand but its all gonna be in payments over the course of months since they have to feed their family's and what not Additional 80 thousand for daughters treatment As I win the verdict women just launch saying that judge is aiding the patriarchal dominance over them or some s Judge holds them in content y miss a payment I can triple it nd up havi ng to sign some papers for privacy purposes not t their names etc etc The still paying to this day if the y ever f--- with have them thrown in jail pretty much Anonymous (ID: dcfyzWYR) 04/22/14(Tue .543 (24 KB, 679x4 >543369275 jus
Anonymous ID Pv4IPfyB) 04/22/14 Tue 07:54:12 14(Tue)07:54:12 No.543366393 ー54336686022543366862 2543366875 >7543367621 >>543367647 2543367691 >2543379887 >543383772 (162 KB, 1272x1161) I've posted my story before and ill post it again because it was a sweet victory over feminazis >Couple years ago >My day off so I can do whatever the hell I want and baby girl doesnt have school Be me taking my step daughter to a local park She was 8 at the time of the Incident >Walk into the park with her and majority of the park are moms and a couple guys but women out number us >Alright sweetie Ⅲ be right here my love go play "KAY!I >Just texting my wife while Amy plays but I'm noticing all these women giving me dirty looks >Occasionally Amy will come up to me and kiss me and say I love you daddy stepped into her life when she was only a year old >Her dad and me get along but he walked out on her because he has severe mental problems from Iraq and I don't blame him but hes a good guy but he feels she wouldn't be safe if he were to snap An hour later I see this woman pulling my daughter aside and tugging at her with a follow me" gesture HEY WHAT THE HELL!?!? GE >Get tackled by 2 white knight males and they restrain me >Ow... what the f---!? GET THE F--- >Punched and kicked "SHUT THE F--- UP P-------- WERE MAKING A CITIZENS ARREST WHAT!?!? GET THE F--- OFF ME THATS MY >Punch again "I SAID SHUT THE F--- UP!!" >Step daughter screaming and hollering telling them to leave me alone "DADDY!!! SAVE ME THEYRE TRYING TO TAKE ME!!! BABY HANG ON DADDY WILL SAVE YOU- "DONT TALK TO HER P--------!!" >Women are scorning me and calling me a grooming sex offender >Can overhear some of them trying to calm her down >"sweetie did he touch you!?" "SWEETIE CALM DOWN YOURE SAFE! he groomed her" >Step daughter is extremely distraught and screaming top of her lungs and crying like a 2 year old and they're trying to put her into a soccer mom van >GET THE F--- OFF ME BABY DADDY WILL SAVE >This time I get pepper sprayed by one of the moms because I'm a Threat to the children T YOUR HANDS OFF- WERE GET THE FUDK OFF NEOKUIS "lt looks like □ Anonymous (ID: Pv4IPfyB) 04/22/14(Tue)08:05:00 No.543367647 543367882 >>543369275 >2543379887 >>543383772 543366393 >Police finally arrive because step daughters screams can be heard for miles >Police arrest me and don't listen to my story pretty much take the feminazis side and white knights IM GONNA SUE EVERY F------ SINGLE ONE OF YOU F--- YOU ALL YOU'RE ALL F----- >Crowd appears and pretty much cheering "P-------- ARRESTED" >However the white knights are arrested too because they did assault me >Couple minutes later I'm in an interrogation room by myself >End up making phone call to wife to come help me out and explain to these idiots that I'm Amy's step dad and all that b------- >Couple hours go by in complete silence and then I can hear my wife screaming top of her lungs calling the PD a bunch of dumb pigs for arresting her husband and shes gonna sue the department for their poor handling of the situation >She bursts through the door and just breaks down crying see my puffed red eyes and cuts and bruises >Behind her is the Captain and 3 detectives including social worker >"Mr. Von Anon On behalf the chief we are deeply sorry for how the situation was handled- >OH SHUT THE F--- UP IM SUING ALL OF YOU, F--- YOU! >One of the female detectives steps in "Hey watch your mouth it was mis communication- I DONT GIVE TWO F---- YOU ARRESTED ME BASED ON THOSE DUMB BITCHES WORD F--- YOU!!! ME A CHANCE TO DEFEND MYSELF YOU GUYS JUST ARRESTED ME ON SIGHT PRETTY MUCH "SIR YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN WE ARE LAW ENFORCEMENT F--- YOUI! >Captain steps in "Ok ok ok I realize how angry you are Mr.Von Anon and tell you what so we can avoid this legal matter we will testify in your defense and have a judge clear you of any wrong doings in your past" >Clear my DUl and you got a deal all hat bulshit cing sten wife screaming top of her unny YOU DIDNT GIVE >Find out later women in the park are part of some feminist group from my lawyer and he ends up serving them including the white knights almost immediately Cont'd ending 543366860 Sorry I just seen this thread and well yeah Anonymous (ID: Pv4IPfyB) 04/22/14(Tue)08:18:20 No.543369275543369551 543370495543370553543370598 543371512 >543373390 543375674 >543375974543376029543376489543379319 543379887 32543382434 543382505 543367647 >Couple months go by and step daughter becomes is traumatized having nightmares of being kidnapped by strange women rares df Shes so paranoid of being alone with women now especially her friends moms >Pi isses the bed every so often >Have psych evaluate her so l can use it in court and pysch even agrees to testify for me >Finally after about 4 months get a court date >Come into court and theres the feminazis and white knights >This is gonna be a clear cut >Police testify and even one of the white knights turns on the feminazis trying to cover his ass BUT OH NO I'm suing you too jackass >Feminazis claim they were in the right because they believed I was doing sexual gestures and actions to my step daughter >Psych takes stand and says she questioned my step daughter did tests and said that I never molested her and clearly those women are deranged and hopped up on emotions Judge doesnt wong and demhild is traumatizeat I never molested her Sentences white knights to 6 months for assaulting me up Says that because of what those women did my child i umatized and the damage is pretty bad may take years for rehabilitation years for rehablitation >Women say that my pysch is wrong and demand a 2nd opinion still hold onto the hes a p--------" defense >Judge doesnt want to hear anymore of it >And out of it me and my wife get a total of 200 thousand but its all gonna be in payments over the course of months since they have to feed their family's and what not Additional 80 thousand for daughters treatment As I win the verdict women just launch saying that judge is aiding the patriarchal dominance over them or some s Judge holds them in content y miss a payment I can triple it nd up havi ng to sign some papers for privacy purposes not t their names etc etc The still paying to this day if the y ever f--- with have them thrown in jail pretty much Anonymous (ID: dcfyzWYR) 04/22/14(Tue .543 (24 KB, 679x4 >543369275 jus

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Applejew Commander

Anonymous ID-kfd/dKI ) 04/07/14 Mon) 17:55:24 UTC +8 № 541 1068 15 Replies. a 5411069372:54 110012022541108190 Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)19:03:55 UTC+8 No.541111596 Replies: 541112270 541112430 plating LoL for a few hours prior to the bottle explosion >ex is devastated, can see all of her emo posts on fb >heard that cops came to ex's house First a little back story of how I got the ldea for it >Come home a little drunk from a friends house >1 am, silence, only thing that emits light is my PC screen. ro g piratebay looking for movies to torrent >suddenly I hear a eardrum piercing explosion from my closet >everybody knows about Commander applejew told them all about the apple juice bottle >showed them her underwear drawer and the exploded bottle >her best friend tells everyone she passed out and p----- herself when she opened the drawer and the bottle exploded >federal investigation ensues >a rancid smell coming from my closet syellow liquid literally on everything, a 1.5 liter bottle of apple juice exploded into 3 pieces tojail.exe wait for cops to show up any day novw con't to Apple Juice saga part IV >apple juice fermented, gas expanded, big boom. >interesting had to throw away a few white shirts since the apple juice wouldn't come off an Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)19:16:16 UTC+8 No.541112430 Replies: 541112980 541113019 541113587 >since it's her parents house she rarely goes to the second floor (grandparents died, left her the house) >bf left her, "needs a change" sshe decided to clean upstairs apparently decided to take a s--- there for convenience >nobody shat there since the party about a week ago >pushes button >bottle explodes Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:16:48 UTC+8 No.541108190 Replies: >541108678 541108831 541110147 >so there is this bitch I used to date sclaimed she was pregnant >didn't tell her I'm sterile since I have a defect in some protein that makes sperm tails or something >(not sure how I feel about never having kids to this day) >dumped her, had illegal abortion, and now looks better then she was opposed to what l expected having kids to this day henshe was opposed to what >ex gets sprayed with toilet water and fermented apple juice >(you'll be surprised how massive of an explosion a little plastic bottle produce with the right pressure) sgoes straight to her friends house, didn't even change >she's hysterical at this point >refuses to get back to the house >moved to a regular apartment withing two weeks from the incident >mutual male friends help her move >mutual friend invited me to help >next day walk to fridge, take out bottle of apple juice insert lit light bulb above head -drink half of each bottle >put outside in the sun for a day to speed up fermentation process pack of little apple juice suspicious because mutual friends and he invited me n the day of the party >bring a six pack of beer, smuggle the six pack of half empty apple juice bottles cont to last part of the saga >hide bag with apple juice in upstairs bathroom >walk around house thinking where to put bottles Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)07:31:29 No.541113587 -(10 KB, 281x179, juicedefuser.jpg) >1 in her panties drawer (she never reaches for the underwear in the back) >1 in the toilet deck (wasn't sure it was going to work) she was relatively a 'fresh ex" at the time, we've been together for a year or so so still have mutual friends, still see her at parties, helped her on random occasions once or twice>yes it is kind of weird, but >1 behind washing machine esn't bother me much and the last one... and this is the best f------ part, in her current bf's gamer PC (f--- him and his red LED case lights) almost got caught dropping the bottle behind the fidge and opening the PC case, s--- was spooky so we help her pack her stuff into boxes she gave us general instructions, but still refused to get into the house traumatized and what not >I do a good job, not slacking around but I have one goal in mind Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:26:26 UTC +8 No.541108831 Replies: 32541109471 look under bed, bottle still there "if I just put it into a random box she'll know it was someone who is in the house right now" >541108190 >decide to put it into something less suspicious and be like "oh I just put it right in the box, didn't even open it" if I'll be questioned e out apple juice bottle under the bed bottle seems bloated a little un >everyday wake up like a kid on Christmas morning expecting to hear about some kind of applosion son the third da hear from a friend that an apple juice bottle left behind the fridge at ex's house exploded rsonally get it to the van, secure it as best as lc they weren't in the house at the time, found out when they came home >place vase on kitchen table when no one is looking le uicesaga avi Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:55:59 UTC+8 No.541110970 R Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)07:41:30 No.541114346 second was the washing machine bottle read about the applejuice creeper >we leave, almost finished unpacking >heard they were asleep at the time of the explosion >ex freaked out, bf raged from confusion >managed to save the washing machine, but cleaning the bathroom was a bitch said she'll finish by herself Oh s--- what happend?" with genuine concern apparently she was eating and wanted to throw the vase since it was her grandmothers and it was ugly the same day after the washing machine bottle mutual friend told me he was playing LoL for a few hours while the bottle exploded >wore headphones so he didn't realize at first what happened until his computer crashed large shard flew near her and cut her face under the chin apple juice fried c le she needed 4 stitches on her face >her face looks like she survived a 6 barrel I'm scared shitles >she didn't want to involve the police again Sapple juice kills shatters case fan I gatling-gun attack from point blank r bf went on a rampage, smashed ex's laptop, slapped her and left they broke up on t stayed in apartment, but made her friend stay with her for a month. friend told me she checks the toilet deck before taking a s--- or pissing, even in public places looks terrified each time she opens a feel kind of bad for it now haven't talked to her for two vears now, moved to a different stat
Anonymous ID-kfd/dKI ) 04/07/14 Mon) 17:55:24 UTC +8 № 541 1068 15 Replies. a 5411069372:54 110012022541108190 Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)19:03:55 UTC+8 No.541111596 Replies: 541112270 541112430 plating LoL for a few hours prior to the bottle explosion >ex is devastated, can see all of her emo posts on fb >heard that cops came to ex's house First a little back story of how I got the ldea for it >Come home a little drunk from a friends house >1 am, silence, only thing that emits light is my PC screen. ro g piratebay looking for movies to torrent >suddenly I hear a eardrum piercing explosion from my closet >everybody knows about Commander applejew told them all about the apple juice bottle >showed them her underwear drawer and the exploded bottle >her best friend tells everyone she passed out and p----- herself when she opened the drawer and the bottle exploded >federal investigation ensues >a rancid smell coming from my closet syellow liquid literally on everything, a 1.5 liter bottle of apple juice exploded into 3 pieces tojail.exe wait for cops to show up any day novw con't to Apple Juice saga part IV >apple juice fermented, gas expanded, big boom. >interesting had to throw away a few white shirts since the apple juice wouldn't come off an Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)19:16:16 UTC+8 No.541112430 Replies: 541112980 541113019 541113587 >since it's her parents house she rarely goes to the second floor (grandparents died, left her the house) >bf left her, "needs a change" sshe decided to clean upstairs apparently decided to take a s--- there for convenience >nobody shat there since the party about a week ago >pushes button >bottle explodes Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:16:48 UTC+8 No.541108190 Replies: >541108678 541108831 541110147 >so there is this bitch I used to date sclaimed she was pregnant >didn't tell her I'm sterile since I have a defect in some protein that makes sperm tails or something >(not sure how I feel about never having kids to this day) >dumped her, had illegal abortion, and now looks better then she was opposed to what l expected having kids to this day henshe was opposed to what >ex gets sprayed with toilet water and fermented apple juice >(you'll be surprised how massive of an explosion a little plastic bottle produce with the right pressure) sgoes straight to her friends house, didn't even change >she's hysterical at this point >refuses to get back to the house >moved to a regular apartment withing two weeks from the incident >mutual male friends help her move >mutual friend invited me to help >next day walk to fridge, take out bottle of apple juice insert lit light bulb above head -drink half of each bottle >put outside in the sun for a day to speed up fermentation process pack of little apple juice suspicious because mutual friends and he invited me n the day of the party >bring a six pack of beer, smuggle the six pack of half empty apple juice bottles cont to last part of the saga >hide bag with apple juice in upstairs bathroom >walk around house thinking where to put bottles Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)07:31:29 No.541113587 -(10 KB, 281x179, juicedefuser.jpg) >1 in her panties drawer (she never reaches for the underwear in the back) >1 in the toilet deck (wasn't sure it was going to work) she was relatively a 'fresh ex" at the time, we've been together for a year or so so still have mutual friends, still see her at parties, helped her on random occasions once or twice>yes it is kind of weird, but >1 behind washing machine esn't bother me much and the last one... and this is the best f------ part, in her current bf's gamer PC (f--- him and his red LED case lights) almost got caught dropping the bottle behind the fidge and opening the PC case, s--- was spooky so we help her pack her stuff into boxes she gave us general instructions, but still refused to get into the house traumatized and what not >I do a good job, not slacking around but I have one goal in mind Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:26:26 UTC +8 No.541108831 Replies: 32541109471 look under bed, bottle still there "if I just put it into a random box she'll know it was someone who is in the house right now" >541108190 >decide to put it into something less suspicious and be like "oh I just put it right in the box, didn't even open it" if I'll be questioned e out apple juice bottle under the bed bottle seems bloated a little un >everyday wake up like a kid on Christmas morning expecting to hear about some kind of applosion son the third da hear from a friend that an apple juice bottle left behind the fridge at ex's house exploded rsonally get it to the van, secure it as best as lc they weren't in the house at the time, found out when they came home >place vase on kitchen table when no one is looking le uicesaga avi Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:55:59 UTC+8 No.541110970 R Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)07:41:30 No.541114346 second was the washing machine bottle read about the applejuice creeper >we leave, almost finished unpacking >heard they were asleep at the time of the explosion >ex freaked out, bf raged from confusion >managed to save the washing machine, but cleaning the bathroom was a bitch said she'll finish by herself Oh s--- what happend?" with genuine concern apparently she was eating and wanted to throw the vase since it was her grandmothers and it was ugly the same day after the washing machine bottle mutual friend told me he was playing LoL for a few hours while the bottle exploded >wore headphones so he didn't realize at first what happened until his computer crashed large shard flew near her and cut her face under the chin apple juice fried c le she needed 4 stitches on her face >her face looks like she survived a 6 barrel I'm scared shitles >she didn't want to involve the police again Sapple juice kills shatters case fan I gatling-gun attack from point blank r bf went on a rampage, smashed ex's laptop, slapped her and left they broke up on t stayed in apartment, but made her friend stay with her for a month. friend told me she checks the toilet deck before taking a s--- or pissing, even in public places looks terrified each time she opens a feel kind of bad for it now haven't talked to her for two vears now, moved to a different stat

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