Greentext Stories - Images
Anon is a corporate shill | /r/Greentext
![1610684789942.png 57 KB PNG >GrubHub perks give you deals on the food you love. The kind of deals that make you boogie. Get the food you love, with perks from GrubHub! Grub what you love!](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/741/864.jpg)
![1610684789942.png 57 KB PNG >GrubHub perks give you deals on the food you love. The kind of deals that make you boogie. Get the food you love, with perks from GrubHub! Grub what you love!](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/741/864.jpg)
Greentext Stories
What about Rebecca? | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 07/21/19(Sun)16:00:54 No.53500811 >bf gets fit >dumps me four months ago >immediately starts dating some skinny blonde c--- called rebecca 28 KB JPG >last night he drunk-dialled me >asked me to come over >we have sex >afterwards i ask "so are we together again?" >"don't be stupid anon. what about rebecca?"](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/685/4a8.jpg)
![: Anonymous 07/21/19(Sun)16:00:54 No.53500811 >bf gets fit >dumps me four months ago >immediately starts dating some skinny blonde c--- called rebecca 28 KB JPG >last night he drunk-dialled me >asked me to come over >we have sex >afterwards i ask "so are we together again?" >"don't be stupid anon. what about rebecca?"](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/685/4a8.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is in denial. | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)00:55:22 No.845360641 >be i >doing my normal edge-sesh for the night >getting kinda bored tbh, paying more attention to the tv than the p--- on my phone >see "BBW Fart Comp" in the 57 KB JPG suggestions >"haha this will be funny" >first girl is easily 450 pounds of nothing but pure american woman >taken aback by the sheer amount of cream colored ass filling my screen immediately >slightly blinded by the amount of light it's casting from my phone screen >she whispers something, so I turn my volume up to hear it >as my volume reaches the highest setting... BRRRRAAAAAAAPPPP!! >rattling my earbuds with the sheer bassy might of this womans ass >c-- instantly >immediately close the incognito window, turn my phone off >go to bed disgusted with myself >three days later >thinkin about them braps... guys i don't want a fart fetish what do i do please help please : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)01:14:31 No.845361885 >I don't want a fart fetish I'm sorry but it seems to be too late for that 1.13 MB GIF](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/684/508.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)00:55:22 No.845360641 >be i >doing my normal edge-sesh for the night >getting kinda bored tbh, paying more attention to the tv than the p--- on my phone >see "BBW Fart Comp" in the 57 KB JPG suggestions >"haha this will be funny" >first girl is easily 450 pounds of nothing but pure american woman >taken aback by the sheer amount of cream colored ass filling my screen immediately >slightly blinded by the amount of light it's casting from my phone screen >she whispers something, so I turn my volume up to hear it >as my volume reaches the highest setting... BRRRRAAAAAAAPPPP!! >rattling my earbuds with the sheer bassy might of this womans ass >c-- instantly >immediately close the incognito window, turn my phone off >go to bed disgusted with myself >three days later >thinkin about them braps... guys i don't want a fart fetish what do i do please help please : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)01:14:31 No.845361885 >I don't want a fart fetish I'm sorry but it seems to be too late for that 1.13 MB GIF](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/684/508.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is itchy | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/20/21 (Wed)19:48:53 No.61954251 itch itch >be me, 14 >shave pubes off because other friends did it >2 days later starts itching like hell >oh god it itches >oh god it itches so good 263 KB PNG >yesss aawwww itch so good >mfw cant resist shaving pubes every few days to get itchy feeling >mfw addicted to itching damn](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/683/34e.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/20/21 (Wed)19:48:53 No.61954251 itch itch >be me, 14 >shave pubes off because other friends did it >2 days later starts itching like hell >oh god it itches >oh god it itches so good 263 KB PNG >yesss aawwww itch so good >mfw cant resist shaving pubes every few days to get itchy feeling >mfw addicted to itching damn](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/683/34e.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon tips the pizza man | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous = 10/21/20(Wed)19:33:57 No.99006488 >Hi anon, that'll be $15 + tip >Hand him 3 five dollar bills and some Radiohead CDs Has anyone else tipped the pizza guy in Radiohead CDs before? 1.8 MB PNG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/626/13b.png)
![: Anonymous = 10/21/20(Wed)19:33:57 No.99006488 >Hi anon, that'll be $15 + tip >Hand him 3 five dollar bills and some Radiohead CDs Has anyone else tipped the pizza guy in Radiohead CDs before? 1.8 MB PNG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/626/13b.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon hits too close to home... | /r/Greentext
![File: cc11ee36ef469abab1f349ebb(...).jpg (565 KB, 1200x1879) O Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)07:40:14 No.61955234 >>61955388 would you date a double amputee girl? O Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)07:54:29 No.61955388 File: d90.jpg (91 KB, 600x532) >>61955234 (OP) i would date any girl as long as she f------ loved me [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [DAuto]](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/573/650.png)
![File: cc11ee36ef469abab1f349ebb(...).jpg (565 KB, 1200x1879) O Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)07:40:14 No.61955234 >>61955388 would you date a double amputee girl? O Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)07:54:29 No.61955388 File: d90.jpg (91 KB, 600x532) >>61955234 (OP) i would date any girl as long as she f------ loved me [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [DAuto]](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/573/650.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon is at sea | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 09/04/18(Tue)11:05:08 No.779004157 >be me >manual labour f-- on a cargo ship in the atlantic >we make a detour to check out a shipwreck on an island >inside its cargo hold we find 29 KB JPG thousands of female dwarves >wat >romantic british coworker gets too close >one of them jumps on his face and clamps her p---- on his mouth >okay.png >takes 4 of us and a f------ crowbar to prize her off >get the f--- out of there >back on the ship, set sail again >having lunch with coworkers >british f-- starts to have a seizure >f------ baby bursts out of his chest and runs off >spend 3 hours cleaning up the blood and crumpets >few days later a fully grown dwarf is running around r----- people >it's my shift to go and hunt the r--- dwarf >carry a flamethrower into a ventilation shaft >turn my motion tracker on >it starts beeping I don't get paid enough for this s---](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/572/e44.jpg)
![: Anonymous 09/04/18(Tue)11:05:08 No.779004157 >be me >manual labour f-- on a cargo ship in the atlantic >we make a detour to check out a shipwreck on an island >inside its cargo hold we find 29 KB JPG thousands of female dwarves >wat >romantic british coworker gets too close >one of them jumps on his face and clamps her p---- on his mouth >okay.png >takes 4 of us and a f------ crowbar to prize her off >get the f--- out of there >back on the ship, set sail again >having lunch with coworkers >british f-- starts to have a seizure >f------ baby bursts out of his chest and runs off >spend 3 hours cleaning up the blood and crumpets >few days later a fully grown dwarf is running around r----- people >it's my shift to go and hunt the r--- dwarf >carry a flamethrower into a ventilation shaft >turn my motion tracker on >it starts beeping I don't get paid enough for this s---](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/572/e44.jpg)
Greentext Stories
i miss those times too | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 06/07/19(Fri)05:27:40 No.52792838 >be me >listening to old dubstep for nostalgia >remember doge, mlg, black ops 2 trickshot montages i miss those simpler times 124 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/571/ad5.jpg)
![: Anonymous 06/07/19(Fri)05:27:40 No.52792838 >be me >listening to old dubstep for nostalgia >remember doge, mlg, black ops 2 trickshot montages i miss those simpler times 124 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/571/ad5.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is based and shartpilled | /r/Greentext
![(first greentext btw) >be me >in online school >usually when I'm on the phone and I have to fart I mute my mic do my business and then unmute 19 KB JPG >in online school we are muted the entire time >have to fart >already muted >unmute my mic, let out the Hiroshima of farts, 11 seconds at the least >mute my mic >my teacher starts laughing >mfw how the f--- do I join back class after this](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/516/0b9.jpg)
![(first greentext btw) >be me >in online school >usually when I'm on the phone and I have to fart I mute my mic do my business and then unmute 19 KB JPG >in online school we are muted the entire time >have to fart >already muted >unmute my mic, let out the Hiroshima of farts, 11 seconds at the least >mute my mic >my teacher starts laughing >mfw how the f--- do I join back class after this](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/516/0b9.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon's fan wont stay up | /r/Greentext
![](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/515/961.jpg)
![](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/515/961.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is confused | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:44:44 No.845311946 I am broken. | am beyond broken. I still don't know what's WE ARE happening. Why was today allowed to happen? what the f--- is going on? TRU 125 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:45:18 No.845311985 COFION DIERDISE >>845311946 (OP) # 20 KB JPG >>845312102 # : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:46:14 No.845312046 LESS MAKEY THREADS Hint: you're retarded MORE TAKEY MEDS 65 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/494/d39.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:44:44 No.845311946 I am broken. | am beyond broken. I still don't know what's WE ARE happening. Why was today allowed to happen? what the f--- is going on? TRU 125 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:45:18 No.845311985 COFION DIERDISE >>845311946 (OP) # 20 KB JPG >>845312102 # : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:46:14 No.845312046 LESS MAKEY THREADS Hint: you're retarded MORE TAKEY MEDS 65 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/494/d39.jpg)
Greentext Stories
anons dad is a hero | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)21:24:15 No.845349589 1608053155613.png 1.42 MB PNG >in boy scouts >scout master is r----- me >dad runs in >'hey pal, how about you f--- someone your own size' >dad pulls down pants >scout master starts to f--- dad >dad uses his a------ muscles to grab hold of scout master by d--- >slams scout master against wall >dad rapes scout master to death My dad, the hero!](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/493/466.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)21:24:15 No.845349589 1608053155613.png 1.42 MB PNG >in boy scouts >scout master is r----- me >dad runs in >'hey pal, how about you f--- someone your own size' >dad pulls down pants >scout master starts to f--- dad >dad uses his a------ muscles to grab hold of scout master by d--- >slams scout master against wall >dad rapes scout master to death My dad, the hero!](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/493/466.jpg)
Greentext Stories
The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)14:54:10 No.845329227 >be me >high school, years ago >addicted to benzos bc anxiety (only weed now) >friend group has one girl >anorexic depressed goth/egirl, 7/10 but my type at the time 10 KB JPG >high af hanging at friends house >playing 5 finger fillet >stab my f------ hand, don't care bc benzo zombie at this point >she tells me to stab her too >do it >she presses her cut into yours >blood mixes >become siblings >says we can't f--- now bc it would be i----- What's the strangest excuse a girl has rejected you /b/?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/466/48f.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)14:54:10 No.845329227 >be me >high school, years ago >addicted to benzos bc anxiety (only weed now) >friend group has one girl >anorexic depressed goth/egirl, 7/10 but my type at the time 10 KB JPG >high af hanging at friends house >playing 5 finger fillet >stab my f------ hand, don't care bc benzo zombie at this point >she tells me to stab her too >do it >she presses her cut into yours >blood mixes >become siblings >says we can't f--- now bc it would be i----- What's the strangest excuse a girl has rejected you /b/?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/466/48f.jpg)
Greentext Stories
things are looking up for anon | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)19:26:14 No.845340737 >finally got good career >getting married to the love of my life in a few weeks >have our first kid on the way Thinking of killing myself. You know, for the lulz and such. Lol could you imagine the look on that stupid bitch's 67 KB PNG face?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/415/1b7.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)19:26:14 No.845340737 >finally got good career >getting married to the love of my life in a few weeks >have our first kid on the way Thinking of killing myself. You know, for the lulz and such. Lol could you imagine the look on that stupid bitch's 67 KB PNG face?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/415/1b7.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is gonna fall | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/17/21(Sun)01:38:27 No.9368776 ANON NOO00 WE CANT DO THAT UNLESS WE ARE MARRIED 52 KB JPG : King's 01/17/21(Sun)01:43:34 No.9368787 | Anonymous 01/17/21(Sun)01:44:43 No.9368789 ock iStock by y ge iStock iSto IStock Stock iry tmages iStock Gny Imaga ck Tstock iSt istockphoto-140253542-1024x1024.jpg 313 KB JPG PLEASE MIKU! JUST GRAB MY HAND! I'M GONNA FALL >>9369100 # >>9369277 # >>9369726 # >>9370007 # >>9370595 # >>9370785 # >>9374916 # >>9376261 #](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/374/c84.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/17/21(Sun)01:38:27 No.9368776 ANON NOO00 WE CANT DO THAT UNLESS WE ARE MARRIED 52 KB JPG : King's 01/17/21(Sun)01:43:34 No.9368787 | Anonymous 01/17/21(Sun)01:44:43 No.9368789 ock iStock by y ge iStock iSto IStock Stock iry tmages iStock Gny Imaga ck Tstock iSt istockphoto-140253542-1024x1024.jpg 313 KB JPG PLEASE MIKU! JUST GRAB MY HAND! I'M GONNA FALL >>9369100 # >>9369277 # >>9369726 # >>9370007 # >>9370595 # >>9370785 # >>9374916 # >>9376261 #](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/374/c84.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon flies a J-20 | /r/Greentext
![](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/001/997/333/5a1.jpg)
![](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/997/333/5a1.jpg)
Greentext Stories