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Happy Thanksgiving | /r/Greentext

File: 24ED8DAC-CA0D-421D-A12D-B(...).png (59 KB, 630x630) Anonymous 11/24/22(Thu)15:14:12 No.889641310 [Reply] >>889641505 >>889641701 >be me >23 >bring friend home for thanksgiving since his family lives across the country >on the drive over, TURKGAY he suggest we play a prank >during dinner, I stand up and announce our relationship >get caught in the moment and kiss him >uncle storms out >dad chases after him >mom starts crying, saying she always knew >sister is excited to tweet that she's inclusive >mom says we have to sleep in separate rooms (he's in with my little sister) I forgot to mention he's black
File: 24ED8DAC-CA0D-421D-A12D-B(...).png (59 KB, 630x630) Anonymous 11/24/22(Thu)15:14:12 No.889641310 [Reply] >>889641505 >>889641701 >be me >23 >bring friend home for thanksgiving since his family lives across the country >on the drive over, TURKGAY he suggest we play a prank >during dinner, I stand up and announce our relationship >get caught in the moment and kiss him >uncle storms out >dad chases after him >mom starts crying, saying she always knew >sister is excited to tweet that she's inclusive >mom says we have to sleep in separate rooms (he's in with my little sister) I forgot to mention he's black

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Anon is a potter fan. | /r/Greentext

SOURCE 10 KB JPG >insular mistrustful community > greedy and obsess about attaining wealth >large hooked nose >dominate the banking system >short in stature and ugly >naturally traitorous and sneaky >cunning and intelligent >disliked by the rest of the community >sloping foreheads and sometimes (actual quote) wear "little pointed hats" What did JK Rowling mean by this?
SOURCE 10 KB JPG >insular mistrustful community > greedy and obsess about attaining wealth >large hooked nose >dominate the banking system >short in stature and ugly >naturally traitorous and sneaky >cunning and intelligent >disliked by the rest of the community >sloping foreheads and sometimes (actual quote) wear "little pointed hats" What did JK Rowling mean by this?

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Anon has opinions about women | /r/Greentext

Anonymous How much do you hate women 84 KB JPG 11/24/22(Thu)14:40:59 No.889617941 >be me >looking for lecture room. >woman also looking for the same room >she knows where it is >presses on 3rd floor button in elevator >l instinctively press of 2nd floor >woman asks me why >tell her 2nd floor is where the room is >she exists at the 2nd floor with me She was right all along. I instinctively disagreed with her because that is how much i hate women. They do not deserve any respect with their potato sized brains. Imagine leaving on the wrong floor because a radom guy told you to. : Anonymous >>889617941 (OP) # Based, anon. Primitive women brains aren't adaptable to the real world. 11/24/22(Thu)14:44:39 No.889618055
Anonymous How much do you hate women 84 KB JPG 11/24/22(Thu)14:40:59 No.889617941 >be me >looking for lecture room. >woman also looking for the same room >she knows where it is >presses on 3rd floor button in elevator >l instinctively press of 2nd floor >woman asks me why >tell her 2nd floor is where the room is >she exists at the 2nd floor with me She was right all along. I instinctively disagreed with her because that is how much i hate women. They do not deserve any respect with their potato sized brains. Imagine leaving on the wrong floor because a radom guy told you to. : Anonymous >>889617941 (OP) # Based, anon. Primitive women brains aren't adaptable to the real world. 11/24/22(Thu)14:44:39 No.889618055

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Anon isnt good at algebra | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 70 KB PNG 1 Reply Anonymous 11/24/22(Thu)15:49:39 No.71111430 >Can't do basic algebra and multiplication >School pretty much gave up on me and half-assed my graduation How retarded are you? View Thread 11/24/22(Thu)15:53:33 No.71111462 I literally tripped on air once
: Anonymous 70 KB PNG 1 Reply Anonymous 11/24/22(Thu)15:49:39 No.71111430 >Can't do basic algebra and multiplication >School pretty much gave up on me and half-assed my graduation How retarded are you? View Thread 11/24/22(Thu)15:53:33 No.71111462 I literally tripped on air once

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Building Bridges | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous MEGAPINT 337 KB PNG 11/14/22(Mon)08:56:14 No.70982335 >be me >retarded and 2 years into mechanical engineering degree >am making b and a, but not liking it so far >taking statics >we have to build a bridge out of pasta and make it hold as much weight as possible >suddenly having fun doing the math and applying it to my bridge Bros, I made the right choice
: Anonymous MEGAPINT 337 KB PNG 11/14/22(Mon)08:56:14 No.70982335 >be me >retarded and 2 years into mechanical engineering degree >am making b and a, but not liking it so far >taking statics >we have to build a bridge out of pasta and make it hold as much weight as possible >suddenly having fun doing the math and applying it to my bridge Bros, I made the right choice

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Insecurity Guard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/08/22(Tue)06:38:47 No.70905323 why dont incels just become security guards? >can not talk to anyone >can sleep all day and work at night >play games on phone laptop switch etc the whole time >if someone actually breaks in just hide and call the police 628 KB PNG >nothing ever happens anyway >requires no effort except for just showing up >impossible to f--- up >requires like 20 minutes in training >pays above min wage >no one bothering or monitoring you all day >no real physical labor >no effort >spend all day alone >can study hobbies while working >can maybe get one where you carry around a gun >can probably just browse 4chan the entire time while getting paid 15-20 an hour
: Anonymous 11/08/22(Tue)06:38:47 No.70905323 why dont incels just become security guards? >can not talk to anyone >can sleep all day and work at night >play games on phone laptop switch etc the whole time >if someone actually breaks in just hide and call the police 628 KB PNG >nothing ever happens anyway >requires no effort except for just showing up >impossible to f--- up >requires like 20 minutes in training >pays above min wage >no one bothering or monitoring you all day >no real physical labor >no effort >spend all day alone >can study hobbies while working >can maybe get one where you carry around a gun >can probably just browse 4chan the entire time while getting paid 15-20 an hour

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Nofap cures(?) anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous NoFap-&-NoPorn Yes. 17 KB JPG 04/02/21(Fri)19:15:11 No.63025532 Who here NoFap or NoPorn? What have the effects been >dirty coomer >stopped jerking off to p--- for a month now >No longer fetishize boys being f----- by their own dads >Now i just fetishize boys being jerked off lovingly by their mothers its an improvement... r-right? 17 Replies / 3 Images View Thread
: Anonymous NoFap-&-NoPorn Yes. 17 KB JPG 04/02/21(Fri)19:15:11 No.63025532 Who here NoFap or NoPorn? What have the effects been >dirty coomer >stopped jerking off to p--- for a month now >No longer fetishize boys being f----- by their own dads >Now i just fetishize boys being jerked off lovingly by their mothers its an improvement... r-right? 17 Replies / 3 Images View Thread

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Found this in my archives, here you go | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/17/17(Sun)19:55:19 No.754163302 >be 14 >Don't know how to masturbate >Home alone 486 KB JPG >Go on a s----- p--- site that I honestly thought was the only source for p--- on the internet >Has images of Brittany Spears nude >I just sit there naked for almost an hour, occasionally patting my d--- >>754169608 # >>754169961 # >>754173777 #
Anonymous 12/17/17(Sun)19:55:19 No.754163302 >be 14 >Don't know how to masturbate >Home alone 486 KB JPG >Go on a s----- p--- site that I honestly thought was the only source for p--- on the internet >Has images of Brittany Spears nude >I just sit there naked for almost an hour, occasionally patting my d--- >>754169608 # >>754169961 # >>754173777 #

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anon's wife likes going to jamaica | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 79 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/05/21(Sun)13:23:04 No.66439080 >wife about to leave for holiday trip to Jamaica >almost finished downloading all my games I'll play when she's away Kino. I love her but sometimes a man needs some manly time alone. You guys should be thankful you dont have to deal with a womans s--- 24/7. 22 KB JPG >working from home due to the coof aka gaming all day 12/05/21(Sun)13:24:19 No.66439093 >>66439080 (OP) # >holiday trip to jamaica hahahahAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
: Anonymous 79 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/05/21(Sun)13:23:04 No.66439080 >wife about to leave for holiday trip to Jamaica >almost finished downloading all my games I'll play when she's away Kino. I love her but sometimes a man needs some manly time alone. You guys should be thankful you dont have to deal with a womans s--- 24/7. 22 KB JPG >working from home due to the coof aka gaming all day 12/05/21(Sun)13:24:19 No.66439093 >>66439080 (OP) # >holiday trip to jamaica hahahahAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

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Anon gets trolled | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 177 KB JPG 11/24/22(Thu)00:25:56 No.71109414 >be god >bored >decide to make human >think "you know what, f--- this f-- in particular" >make human 5'1 >make human repulsive with disfigured face >make human 80iq >make human have erectile dysfunction >last but not least >let the human be made aware of ALL of his flaws for the rest of his life >dont want this human to blame me for it >make the excuse that 'all humans are born unique for a reason' >haha thatll show him mfw im the human
Anonymous 177 KB JPG 11/24/22(Thu)00:25:56 No.71109414 >be god >bored >decide to make human >think "you know what, f--- this f-- in particular" >make human 5'1 >make human repulsive with disfigured face >make human 80iq >make human have erectile dysfunction >last but not least >let the human be made aware of ALL of his flaws for the rest of his life >dont want this human to blame me for it >make the excuse that 'all humans are born unique for a reason' >haha thatll show him mfw im the human

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Anon doesn't like sports | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 2e40vh9S) [+] 02/19/22(Sat)02:02:12 No.361864652 >>361862958 (OP) # Typical sports fan. Been saying it for years, you can not be a sports fan without being a cuckold. The act of enjoying sports is the same as being cucked. >wow look how much bigger and stronger that guy is >ya know, I tried to play sports in school and did pretty well but nothing like them oh wow >"Honey! do you have my jersey!? you know, the one with another man's name on it? oh wow, wearing this thing always gets me turned on, I like to pretend to be Tyrese Shinbone when I'm railing my wife" >>361864995 # >>361867666 # >>361869140 # >>361869816 # >>361873110 # >>361879709 # >>361881231 # >>361881991 # >>361882285 # >>361883100 # >>361883772 # >>361884970 # >>361885555 # >>361885769 # >>361886590 # >>361887278 # >>361888487 # >>361888665 # >>361888948 # >>361890381 # >>361890652 # >>361890678 # >>361892222 # >>361892580 # >>361892987 # >>361893128 # >>361893249 # >>361893458 # >>361894589 # >>361894595 # >>361895220 # >>361895343 # >>361895686 # >>361896244 # >>361896774 # >>361897498 #
: Anonymous (ID: 2e40vh9S) [+] 02/19/22(Sat)02:02:12 No.361864652 >>361862958 (OP) # Typical sports fan. Been saying it for years, you can not be a sports fan without being a cuckold. The act of enjoying sports is the same as being cucked. >wow look how much bigger and stronger that guy is >ya know, I tried to play sports in school and did pretty well but nothing like them oh wow >"Honey! do you have my jersey!? you know, the one with another man's name on it? oh wow, wearing this thing always gets me turned on, I like to pretend to be Tyrese Shinbone when I'm railing my wife" >>361864995 # >>361867666 # >>361869140 # >>361869816 # >>361873110 # >>361879709 # >>361881231 # >>361881991 # >>361882285 # >>361883100 # >>361883772 # >>361884970 # >>361885555 # >>361885769 # >>361886590 # >>361887278 # >>361888487 # >>361888665 # >>361888948 # >>361890381 # >>361890652 # >>361890678 # >>361892222 # >>361892580 # >>361892987 # >>361893128 # >>361893249 # >>361893458 # >>361894589 # >>361894595 # >>361895220 # >>361895343 # >>361895686 # >>361896244 # >>361896774 # >>361897498 #

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Kissing Cousin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/23/22(Wed) 22:14:30 No.71108062 Is my cousin trying to f--- me? >always looking at me >always talking to me >always asking me if im going to family events >always gives me massages >always invites me out to the bar I thought maybe she's trying to set me up with one of her friends but now I'm not so sure. 127 KB PNG 11/23/22(Wed)22:15:59 No.71108072 Anonymous >>71108062 (OP) # she's treating you like a family member bro w-- stop spending so much time on here
: Anonymous 11/23/22(Wed) 22:14:30 No.71108062 Is my cousin trying to f--- me? >always looking at me >always talking to me >always asking me if im going to family events >always gives me massages >always invites me out to the bar I thought maybe she's trying to set me up with one of her friends but now I'm not so sure. 127 KB PNG 11/23/22(Wed)22:15:59 No.71108072 Anonymous >>71108062 (OP) # she's treating you like a family member bro w-- stop spending so much time on here

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Anon got a bf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 60 KB JPG 09/26/21(Sun)19:35:10 No.65534359 >became gay >get bf who is obsessed with me >love him >no more worries about anything feels good man, kinda surreal to see all these tfw no gf posters out there 09/26/21(Sun)19:38:07 No.65534397 : Anonymous >>65534359 (OP) # F--- off gay chad
: Anonymous 60 KB JPG 09/26/21(Sun)19:35:10 No.65534359 >became gay >get bf who is obsessed with me >love him >no more worries about anything feels good man, kinda surreal to see all these tfw no gf posters out there 09/26/21(Sun)19:38:07 No.65534397 : Anonymous >>65534359 (OP) # F--- off gay chad

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anon tries a new restaurant | /r/Greentext

Carnitas-3.jpg 233 KB JPG DANERA LUCHITO >They all order the same thing as me >We all take a bite and it tastes like s--- Man Sand >be me >Get off train, hungry as hell >Mexican restaurant nearby >Walk in, order large ass burrito >Tastes so f------ good, the most delicious burrito I've ever had >Have to tell my friends about it >Fast forward a week and my friends are with me >They all think I have s----- taste because of this >I try explaining that it was just a bad visit but they won't listen SEAL IS BRI >Go back the next day and it tastes good to me but my friends won't try again Why do restaurants have to be like this?
Carnitas-3.jpg 233 KB JPG DANERA LUCHITO >They all order the same thing as me >We all take a bite and it tastes like s--- Man Sand >be me >Get off train, hungry as hell >Mexican restaurant nearby >Walk in, order large ass burrito >Tastes so f------ good, the most delicious burrito I've ever had >Have to tell my friends about it >Fast forward a week and my friends are with me >They all think I have s----- taste because of this >I try explaining that it was just a bad visit but they won't listen SEAL IS BRI >Go back the next day and it tastes good to me but my friends won't try again Why do restaurants have to be like this?

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Lel anon wow | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/13/22(Sun)20:26:44 No.874372800 >Be me >Two years ago >Friend has his first kid >Friend is white Worth it >Baby comes out black with nappy hair >Everyone is uncomfortable as it's obvious his wife cheated 115 KB.JPG >People ignore it like king of the hill >He had a barbecue celebrating his first born" >Show up >Autism over 9000 >"Did you overcook that one?" >Punches me in the face
Anonymous 03/13/22(Sun)20:26:44 No.874372800 >Be me >Two years ago >Friend has his first kid >Friend is white Worth it >Baby comes out black with nappy hair >Everyone is uncomfortable as it's obvious his wife cheated 115 KB.JPG >People ignore it like king of the hill >He had a barbecue celebrating his first born" >Show up >Autism over 9000 >"Did you overcook that one?" >Punches me in the face

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Anon chooses the wrong fantasy race | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/16/20(Wed)10:47:37 No.842458908 485.png 177 KB PNG >start new DnD game with friends >we are picking our races >i chose fae as my race >friends laugh >mfw for the rest of the game they call me a faegit
: Anonymous 12/16/20(Wed)10:47:37 No.842458908 485.png 177 KB PNG >start new DnD game with friends >we are picking our races >i chose fae as my race >friends laugh >mfw for the rest of the game they call me a faegit

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Lost anon? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous + 11/23/22(Wed)20:49:55 No.125622187 Anonymous + >>125622187 (OP) # wrong board sorry TROLL.jpg 115 KB JPG THE BULL IS HIV POSITIVE 11/23/22(Wed)20:50:23 No.125622236
Anonymous + 11/23/22(Wed)20:49:55 No.125622187 Anonymous + >>125622187 (OP) # wrong board sorry TROLL.jpg 115 KB JPG THE BULL IS HIV POSITIVE 11/23/22(Wed)20:50:23 No.125622236

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Anon cant interact with females | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 69 KB JPG 03/12/22(Sat)03:14:39 No.67749641 >return to work in factory after 5 month transfer >girl I worked with sees me and runs to hug me >says she's very glad we'll work together this year >asks me few mins later did I find a gf in meantime >tell no >tells me something will come up sooner or later I'm kinda autistic so I'm not sure what this whole event meant
Anonymous 69 KB JPG 03/12/22(Sat)03:14:39 No.67749641 >return to work in factory after 5 month transfer >girl I worked with sees me and runs to hug me >says she's very glad we'll work together this year >asks me few mins later did I find a gf in meantime >tell no >tells me something will come up sooner or later I'm kinda autistic so I'm not sure what this whole event meant

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Anon doesnt like police officers | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Popo 11/24/22(Thu)16:08:15 No.71111589 Anyone else hate cops?I live in a relatively safe country and most of them dont have to do s---, so i go out of my way to mess with them >get in my car in the middle of the night looking like pic related >make sure to not blink for a few minutes so my eyes are watery and red >play loud, obnoxious rap music in the car >when they pull me over i make sure to rip a nice steaming fart so when they bend over my car window they get hit in the face with my assjuice >act sleepy and lethargic when they ask me stuff >they test me for alcohol and drugs and basically raid my car everytime (always clean) >waste an hour asking me if i have anything and getting p----- off at me,after that they let me go >repeat at least once a week 265 KB JPG Im pretty sure the entire police department knows me by now cuz they stopped pulling me over.Next week im going to another town to troll some more lazy cops View Thread
: Anonymous Popo 11/24/22(Thu)16:08:15 No.71111589 Anyone else hate cops?I live in a relatively safe country and most of them dont have to do s---, so i go out of my way to mess with them >get in my car in the middle of the night looking like pic related >make sure to not blink for a few minutes so my eyes are watery and red >play loud, obnoxious rap music in the car >when they pull me over i make sure to rip a nice steaming fart so when they bend over my car window they get hit in the face with my assjuice >act sleepy and lethargic when they ask me stuff >they test me for alcohol and drugs and basically raid my car everytime (always clean) >waste an hour asking me if i have anything and getting p----- off at me,after that they let me go >repeat at least once a week 265 KB JPG Im pretty sure the entire police department knows me by now cuz they stopped pulling me over.Next week im going to another town to troll some more lazy cops View Thread

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More like eccentric | /r/Greentext

Do you larp to increase gains? No.67262326 17 hours ago witcher.jpg JPG 57.2 KiB 500x565 >pretend I'm Geralt >start mixing my protein shakes with strong alcohol like they're witcher potions >meditate in between sets >take notes of various creatures around the gym (roiders, hambeasts, lanklets, etc...) and their behaviour/weaknesses >try to haggle with the qt cashier for lower gym membership : >loudly say "damn you're ugly" before lifts >lifts skyrocket >gains skyrocket Is larping good for gains or am I just autistic?
Do you larp to increase gains? No.67262326 17 hours ago witcher.jpg JPG 57.2 KiB 500x565 >pretend I'm Geralt >start mixing my protein shakes with strong alcohol like they're witcher potions >meditate in between sets >take notes of various creatures around the gym (roiders, hambeasts, lanklets, etc...) and their behaviour/weaknesses >try to haggle with the qt cashier for lower gym membership : >loudly say "damn you're ugly" before lifts >lifts skyrocket >gains skyrocket Is larping good for gains or am I just autistic?

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