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Anon meets the king | /r/Greentext

58 KB PNG >be me >see a ad for a mayonnaise enthusiast fan club >laugh at how retarded it is >decide to join because its funny >dont even like mayo >week later, show up for the first meeting >its a bunch of dudes sitting around a table with one guy sitting in a kings chair >he wears a crown and a badge that says "mayo king" >take a seat, thinking its gonna be a joke >they start interrogating me about mayo >history of mayo >mayo brands >mayo-making techniques >idk s--- about mayo >they sense somethings off >they start arguing wether i should be allowed in >one yells "HE PROBALY LIKES KETCHUP!" >another yells "WE NEED TO BE INCLUSIVE TO OUTSIDERS" >things escalate quickly >"mayo kings" stands up >"I HEREBY DECLARE THAT ANON IS A KETCHUPFUCKER AND MUST BE PUNISHED ACCORDINGLY!" >the whole group starts attacking me >they beat the absolute f--- out of me >spend a week in the hospital >police dont believe me >they think im insane
58 KB PNG >be me >see a ad for a mayonnaise enthusiast fan club >laugh at how retarded it is >decide to join because its funny >dont even like mayo >week later, show up for the first meeting >its a bunch of dudes sitting around a table with one guy sitting in a kings chair >he wears a crown and a badge that says "mayo king" >take a seat, thinking its gonna be a joke >they start interrogating me about mayo >history of mayo >mayo brands >mayo-making techniques >idk s--- about mayo >they sense somethings off >they start arguing wether i should be allowed in >one yells "HE PROBALY LIKES KETCHUP!" >another yells "WE NEED TO BE INCLUSIVE TO OUTSIDERS" >things escalate quickly >"mayo kings" stands up >"I HEREBY DECLARE THAT ANON IS A KETCHUPFUCKER AND MUST BE PUNISHED ACCORDINGLY!" >the whole group starts attacking me >they beat the absolute f--- out of me >spend a week in the hospital >police dont believe me >they think im insane

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Anon DESPERATELY wants to like trains | /r/Greentext

File: Screenshot 2025-03-10 122737.png (1.33 MB, 1092x609) Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)13:34:42 No.2036161 ► How do I psyop myself into liking trains? Any good books/videos/documentaries? I'm really into other methods of transportation/infrastructure and I keep trying to spark that same interest in trains, but I haven't been able to. >> Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 13:45:09 No.2036162 >>2036164 Why do you feel that you need to like trains? Stop being retarded and using stupid phrases like "psyop." Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)13:58:43 No.2036164 ►>>2036166 >>2036162 I just want to, they seem objectively cool. Also I'm in America, I'll be as retarded as I please. Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)14:09:44 No.2036166 >>2036164 >They're cool >But I'm not interested in them >Help me to become interested in them You have problems that no one here is qualified to address.
File: Screenshot 2025-03-10 122737.png (1.33 MB, 1092x609) Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)13:34:42 No.2036161 ► How do I psyop myself into liking trains? Any good books/videos/documentaries? I'm really into other methods of transportation/infrastructure and I keep trying to spark that same interest in trains, but I haven't been able to. >> Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 13:45:09 No.2036162 >>2036164 Why do you feel that you need to like trains? Stop being retarded and using stupid phrases like "psyop." Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)13:58:43 No.2036164 ►>>2036166 >>2036162 I just want to, they seem objectively cool. Also I'm in America, I'll be as retarded as I please. Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)14:09:44 No.2036166 >>2036164 >They're cool >But I'm not interested in them >Help me to become interested in them You have problems that no one here is qualified to address.

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Is there even a way to make it longer? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/09/25(Sun)20:05:19 No.932252129 >3 inches 308 KB JPG
Anonymous 03/09/25(Sun)20:05:19 No.932252129 >3 inches 308 KB JPG

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Anon cracked it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous IVE CRACKED THE CODE 03/11/25(Tue)00:16:45 No.932297476 432 KB PNG >f--- the girls >pretend to be f----- >girls say I'm hot >say "if I wasn't gay would you f--- me" >"100%" >"definitely" >"I wish guys like you were straight" >confess that I'm straight >they can't backtrack now I'm trademarking this process as "FagMAXXING". Anonymous >>932297476 (OP) # 03/11/25(Tue)00:19:58 No.932297578 That sounds kinda gay tbh
: Anonymous IVE CRACKED THE CODE 03/11/25(Tue)00:16:45 No.932297476 432 KB PNG >f--- the girls >pretend to be f----- >girls say I'm hot >say "if I wasn't gay would you f--- me" >"100%" >"definitely" >"I wish guys like you were straight" >confess that I'm straight >they can't backtrack now I'm trademarking this process as "FagMAXXING". Anonymous >>932297476 (OP) # 03/11/25(Tue)00:19:58 No.932297578 That sounds kinda gay tbh

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Dark and darker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 14 KB GIF 03/10/25(Mon)21:22:20 No.80585679 >be me >work at convenience store >black customer >comes to the counter with his stuff >tell him he total is $11.3 >"only got like ten on me" >say that it's okay >he turns to his friend >"damn, he on some real n---- s---" >they laugh and leave I can usually let $5-10 go every day like that due to rounding errors. Did I do good?
: Anonymous 14 KB GIF 03/10/25(Mon)21:22:20 No.80585679 >be me >work at convenience store >black customer >comes to the counter with his stuff >tell him he total is $11.3 >"only got like ten on me" >say that it's okay >he turns to his friend >"damn, he on some real n---- s---" >they laugh and leave I can usually let $5-10 go every day like that due to rounding errors. Did I do good?

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Hitler and himmler typa shit | /r/Greentext

1661814739335993.jpg 97 KB JPG >Sauronman?! You've allied with Sauron?!
1661814739335993.jpg 97 KB JPG >Sauronman?! You've allied with Sauron?!

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“Ten Bucks to Gryffindor!” | /r/Greentext

File: GIIKwhEXCAAjE71.jpg (64 KB, 1170x947) Grok ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 10:23:54 No.209255781 >>209255794 >>209255810 >>209255866 >>209255930 >>209255952 >>209255970 >>209256017 >>209257380 >>209257429 >>209257459 >>209257482 >>209257602 >>209258078>>209258320 >>209258648 >>209259493 >>209260187 >>209260806 >>209261627 >>209261645 >>209262273 >>209262321 >>209262469 >>209262667 >>209263222 >>209263364 POTTAH ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 10:24:41 No.209255794 >>209255781 (OP). DROPPED >> ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 10:52:59 No.209256351 >>209256415 >>209263985 How is this casting real. I thought /pol/ was just joking Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 13:43:53 No.209260041 ► >Harry was happily tucking into unseasoned boiled potatoes, glad to finally have some ballast in his stomach after years of neglect, when his scar began to ache. >He looked up at the teacher's table, where an incredibly handsome black man was staring at him. >Percy, who's that male model up there? >Oh, you mean Professor Snape? Yes, he is very good looking isn't he? He won a few male beauty pageants when he was younger. He teaches lotions. You know, coconut oil for your skin, that sort of thing. But what he really wants is to teach Defence Against the Tricknology of the Enemy. Everyone knows he's been after that position for years. Dumbledore just finds his position on the topic a little too...esoteric. ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)15:55:42 No.209262329 I thought Trump banned this sort of thing ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)16:45:43 No.209263026 File: aalyu.jpg (93 KB, 1198x855) RIS Raymond Gr Maria Lundströr FaceApp >You will live to experience another golden age of potter posting Thank you God ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 17:55:42 No.209263924 >zesty buck gets NTR'd by a hwite a---- Xisters...
File: GIIKwhEXCAAjE71.jpg (64 KB, 1170x947) Grok ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 10:23:54 No.209255781 >>209255794 >>209255810 >>209255866 >>209255930 >>209255952 >>209255970 >>209256017 >>209257380 >>209257429 >>209257459 >>209257482 >>209257602 >>209258078>>209258320 >>209258648 >>209259493 >>209260187 >>209260806 >>209261627 >>209261645 >>209262273 >>209262321 >>209262469 >>209262667 >>209263222 >>209263364 POTTAH ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 10:24:41 No.209255794 >>209255781 (OP). DROPPED >> ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 10:52:59 No.209256351 >>209256415 >>209263985 How is this casting real. I thought /pol/ was just joking Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 13:43:53 No.209260041 ► >Harry was happily tucking into unseasoned boiled potatoes, glad to finally have some ballast in his stomach after years of neglect, when his scar began to ache. >He looked up at the teacher's table, where an incredibly handsome black man was staring at him. >Percy, who's that male model up there? >Oh, you mean Professor Snape? Yes, he is very good looking isn't he? He won a few male beauty pageants when he was younger. He teaches lotions. You know, coconut oil for your skin, that sort of thing. But what he really wants is to teach Defence Against the Tricknology of the Enemy. Everyone knows he's been after that position for years. Dumbledore just finds his position on the topic a little too...esoteric. ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)15:55:42 No.209262329 I thought Trump banned this sort of thing ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon)16:45:43 No.209263026 File: aalyu.jpg (93 KB, 1198x855) RIS Raymond Gr Maria Lundströr FaceApp >You will live to experience another golden age of potter posting Thank you God ☐ Anonymous 03/10/25(Mon) 17:55:42 No.209263924 >zesty buck gets NTR'd by a hwite a---- Xisters...

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Anon used to be in a band | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 50 KB JPG of our albums 03/10/25(Mon)01:04:20 No.932281181 >be me in 2005, part of a band (pic unrelated) >semi big on myspace that barely anyone remembers in 2025, though I'd expect the name to surprise a few emo/pop punk diehards >I played Rhythm guitar and backup vocals as well as wrote lyrics >We sold around 100,000 copies of one >The album was by far our most popular but included a pre- gap track that no one found >Pre gap tracks are essentially only found by rewinding further than track 1 and hide themselves, some cd players can't detect them >Song was about our bassists ex BF who died in a car accident essentially making fun of him in a really f----- up way and may have included slurs as backup vocal parts >No one ever found this song and if they did, never talked about it, as we would've been cancelled as a band Anyways, figured I'd get that off my chest. I feel bad.. I have a pee fetish now and just jerked off 11 times today so that's kinda cool though
Anonymous 50 KB JPG of our albums 03/10/25(Mon)01:04:20 No.932281181 >be me in 2005, part of a band (pic unrelated) >semi big on myspace that barely anyone remembers in 2025, though I'd expect the name to surprise a few emo/pop punk diehards >I played Rhythm guitar and backup vocals as well as wrote lyrics >We sold around 100,000 copies of one >The album was by far our most popular but included a pre- gap track that no one found >Pre gap tracks are essentially only found by rewinding further than track 1 and hide themselves, some cd players can't detect them >Song was about our bassists ex BF who died in a car accident essentially making fun of him in a really f----- up way and may have included slurs as backup vocal parts >No one ever found this song and if they did, never talked about it, as we would've been cancelled as a band Anyways, figured I'd get that off my chest. I feel bad.. I have a pee fetish now and just jerked off 11 times today so that's kinda cool though

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What can man do against such reckless hate? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: qUwNWmW8 >be me 103/10/25(Mon)07:11:52 No.499966436 >go to 4chan to read the musings of modern philosophers >see that it is full of anti Indian posts >start spending less time on 4chan >start using leddit instead >join r/4chan >it's no different than the posts on the 4chan website, unsubs from it >join r/greetext >it's actually pretty chill compared to r/4chan >engage in regular banter with my fellow ledditors on r/greentext >faith in humanity restored >have to leave all social media due to personal engagement >I come back after a month to the subleddit >suddenly it's full of anti Indian posts >realize that the entirety of reddit has become anti Indian >is it over, India bros?
Anonymous (ID: qUwNWmW8 >be me 103/10/25(Mon)07:11:52 No.499966436 >go to 4chan to read the musings of modern philosophers >see that it is full of anti Indian posts >start spending less time on 4chan >start using leddit instead >join r/4chan >it's no different than the posts on the 4chan website, unsubs from it >join r/greetext >it's actually pretty chill compared to r/4chan >engage in regular banter with my fellow ledditors on r/greentext >faith in humanity restored >have to leave all social media due to personal engagement >I come back after a month to the subleddit >suddenly it's full of anti Indian posts >realize that the entirety of reddit has become anti Indian >is it over, India bros?

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Actually, what Indian video games are there? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/20/24(Thu)09:00:27 No.680285540 Flag_of_India.png 218 KB PNG >largest population in the world >no good videogames explain this
: Anonymous 06/20/24(Thu)09:00:27 No.680285540 Flag_of_India.png 218 KB PNG >largest population in the world >no good videogames explain this

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Anon is 102% African | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: MQmaBBxY) 704 KB PNG 11/28/23(Tue)12:49:26 No.19148659 >Be me. >Tired of being. >Go to fancy indoor pool at my new apartment. >There's nothing but brownies everywhere. >Exactly what you would expect, loud music, people smoking right outside the entrance, standing by the side in full coats and saggy pants, unsupervised kids raising hell everywhere. Just the opposite of pool vibes. >Start thinking about how this country is going to s---. >Dead serious, it took me seeing my reflection in the pool to remember I'm black. Probably the blackest one there. I think i'm spending too much time on this website...
Anonymous (ID: MQmaBBxY) 704 KB PNG 11/28/23(Tue)12:49:26 No.19148659 >Be me. >Tired of being. >Go to fancy indoor pool at my new apartment. >There's nothing but brownies everywhere. >Exactly what you would expect, loud music, people smoking right outside the entrance, standing by the side in full coats and saggy pants, unsupervised kids raising hell everywhere. Just the opposite of pool vibes. >Start thinking about how this country is going to s---. >Dead serious, it took me seeing my reflection in the pool to remember I'm black. Probably the blackest one there. I think i'm spending too much time on this website...

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Anon has a test in muscular men | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Vidya Gorilla Women Thread MISS So action 1.68 MB JPG 03/09/25(Sun)10:39:41 No.704879263 >game has muscular women >are actually attractive, strong, can be romanced, recruited, actually competent, likeable personality, no woke DEI girlboss slop Oh yeah, it's gaming time 100 Replies/26 Images Anonymous >>704888859 # View Thread 03/09/25(Sun)16:48:02 No.704894075 H---, everyone knows that you f--- bitches and hug your bros
Anonymous Vidya Gorilla Women Thread MISS So action 1.68 MB JPG 03/09/25(Sun)10:39:41 No.704879263 >game has muscular women >are actually attractive, strong, can be romanced, recruited, actually competent, likeable personality, no woke DEI girlboss slop Oh yeah, it's gaming time 100 Replies/26 Images Anonymous >>704888859 # View Thread 03/09/25(Sun)16:48:02 No.704894075 H---, everyone knows that you f--- bitches and hug your bros

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Lazy developers will become the bane of gaming, overly reliant on easy and cheap options. | /r/Green...

Anonymous 03/09/25(Sun)12:17:21 No.704883123 Now that the dust has settled.. will DLSS 4 vs DLSS 3 /v/ finally accept the fact upscaling is 1440P Hardware 1440P the future? Unboxed DLSS 4 Upscaling is Fantastic for 1440p Gaming Hardware Unboxed 23:31 802 KB PNG 33 Replies / 4 Images Anonymous >>704883123 (OP) # >it's so optimized now! View Thread 03/09/25(Sun)16:04:20 No.704892248 What's the point when games look worse and demand more powerful hardware? Anonymous >>704891107 # 03/09/25(Sun)16:05:18 No.704892280 you will though since modern developers are both lazy and incompetent >>704892963 # Anonymous >>704892139 # 03/09/25(Sun)16:08:41 No.704892419 YouTubers refuse to test DLSS 4 on anything that's not RTX 40 and 50, because it runs way worse on older hardware. On my 2070S, at 4K Performance mode, transformer model is 3 ms more expensive than CNN. If you're aiming at 60 fps it's still an okay choice, but you can as well use higher quality mode and inject CAS, sometimes even for better performance gains. But for high refresh rates, additional 3 ms is just way too much.
Anonymous 03/09/25(Sun)12:17:21 No.704883123 Now that the dust has settled.. will DLSS 4 vs DLSS 3 /v/ finally accept the fact upscaling is 1440P Hardware 1440P the future? Unboxed DLSS 4 Upscaling is Fantastic for 1440p Gaming Hardware Unboxed 23:31 802 KB PNG 33 Replies / 4 Images Anonymous >>704883123 (OP) # >it's so optimized now! View Thread 03/09/25(Sun)16:04:20 No.704892248 What's the point when games look worse and demand more powerful hardware? Anonymous >>704891107 # 03/09/25(Sun)16:05:18 No.704892280 you will though since modern developers are both lazy and incompetent >>704892963 # Anonymous >>704892139 # 03/09/25(Sun)16:08:41 No.704892419 YouTubers refuse to test DLSS 4 on anything that's not RTX 40 and 50, because it runs way worse on older hardware. On my 2070S, at 4K Performance mode, transformer model is 3 ms more expensive than CNN. If you're aiming at 60 fps it's still an okay choice, but you can as well use higher quality mode and inject CAS, sometimes even for better performance gains. But for high refresh rates, additional 3 ms is just way too much.

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I wonder how she is doing now | /r/Greentext

Anonymous girl 48 KB JPG >FFW 04/05/22(Tue)09:59:11 No.26166593 >be my sister >get pregnant while being a teenager by a "bad boy" w----- >"bad boy" w----- leaves the city with help from his parents because he didn't wanted to take charge >sister becomes single mom of a baby >baby girl was 5 years old and can talk and understand situations >It was Dad's day in the kindergarten and the kids were supposed to make a drawn for their Dad's. >Niece comes home criying because she had no Dad and the other kids were mean to her >i ended up telling my niece i was her Dad and introduced my self as such in front of her teachers and her classmates later on that week and because i have the same lastname of my sister it was easier for me to tell people that my niece is my daughter How long until i tell her the truth? She totally thinks of me as her Dad since then, it has been a year, she 6 years old now and she has officially started elementary school. My Dad and my Mom and my sister hasn't told her the truth yet and I don't want to tell her now neither. I think my niece could get emotionally stunned if she found out the truth at this point. And i don't want to lose her love, do you know how it feels getting attention and love for once? It feels good, i for once feel validated and beloved. She clinges on me very much and 100% behaves around. me like a daughter do with their Dad, she actually thinks I'm her biological Dad. I'm feeling emotionally conflicted because i know I'm her uncle but I've come to develop paternal feelings for her. I have grown fond to her. But I know my sister will tell her the truth at some point.
Anonymous girl 48 KB JPG >FFW 04/05/22(Tue)09:59:11 No.26166593 >be my sister >get pregnant while being a teenager by a "bad boy" w----- >"bad boy" w----- leaves the city with help from his parents because he didn't wanted to take charge >sister becomes single mom of a baby >baby girl was 5 years old and can talk and understand situations >It was Dad's day in the kindergarten and the kids were supposed to make a drawn for their Dad's. >Niece comes home criying because she had no Dad and the other kids were mean to her >i ended up telling my niece i was her Dad and introduced my self as such in front of her teachers and her classmates later on that week and because i have the same lastname of my sister it was easier for me to tell people that my niece is my daughter How long until i tell her the truth? She totally thinks of me as her Dad since then, it has been a year, she 6 years old now and she has officially started elementary school. My Dad and my Mom and my sister hasn't told her the truth yet and I don't want to tell her now neither. I think my niece could get emotionally stunned if she found out the truth at this point. And i don't want to lose her love, do you know how it feels getting attention and love for once? It feels good, i for once feel validated and beloved. She clinges on me very much and 100% behaves around. me like a daughter do with their Dad, she actually thinks I'm her biological Dad. I'm feeling emotionally conflicted because i know I'm her uncle but I've come to develop paternal feelings for her. I have grown fond to her. But I know my sister will tell her the truth at some point.

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Superpower 2020 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: BGXGbEvz) 10/23/22(Sun)10:42:03 No.401103647 486 KB JPG Why was the moon brown when China went, but grey when America "went"? 10/23/22(Sun)10:43:21 No.401103731 Anonymous (ID: HYDORBRA) >>401103647 (OP) # America went at night >>401105994 # >>401106362 # >>401107353 # Anonymous (ID: LN52z6t7 >>401103647 (OP) # 10/23/22(Sun)10:43:28 No.401103741 Because the Indians visited in between >>401103875 # >>401104084 # >>401104339 # >>401104406 # >>401104875 # >>401105442 # >>401106046 #
Anonymous (ID: BGXGbEvz) 10/23/22(Sun)10:42:03 No.401103647 486 KB JPG Why was the moon brown when China went, but grey when America "went"? 10/23/22(Sun)10:43:21 No.401103731 Anonymous (ID: HYDORBRA) >>401103647 (OP) # America went at night >>401105994 # >>401106362 # >>401107353 # Anonymous (ID: LN52z6t7 >>401103647 (OP) # 10/23/22(Sun)10:43:28 No.401103741 Because the Indians visited in between >>401103875 # >>401104084 # >>401104339 # >>401104406 # >>401104875 # >>401105442 # >>401106046 #

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Defence Against the Dark Arts | /r/Greentext

File: SILENCE.jpg (73 KB, 756x521) Anonymous 03/09/25(Sun)19:18:10 No.209241293 ► >The great hall was packed for a feast. Students were joking, bantering and reminiscing as they enjoyed the most delectable food and drink the wizarding world had to offer. >"AHEM... *tink tink*... please, everyone, I have a few announcements to make," Dumbledore declared. The students turned their attention to the podium. >"First off I would like to remind everyone that BLACK magic is forbidden at Hogwarts," he said while staring directly at Snape. >"The DARK arts may seem alluring to PRIMITIVE and BESTIAL minds, but we are civilized folk. Keep your thoughts pure, keep them WHITE as snow, lest they be BLACKENED by the DARK arts." Snape's pupils widened, he began to tremble and sweat. >"Secondly, there is a... slithering issue that has beset Hogwarts." Dumbledore turned his oppressive gaze to Draco Malfoy. >"There is a group that has a lot of dirt on its scales. Whenever dark wizardry is afoot, they are involved. Nearly all of He-Who- Shall-Not-Be-Named's soldiers came from this group. Despite being only 13% of Hogwart's population they commit over 50% of all dark wizardry. They are a venomous, cold-blooded bunch, and due to the Ministry of Magic's anti-discrimination laws I can't say more than that. However, this den of vipers has not escaped my notice, and I will do everything in my power as Headmaster to make them suffer!" Malfoy lowered his head, his eyes becoming red and watery, barely containing his tears.
File: SILENCE.jpg (73 KB, 756x521) Anonymous 03/09/25(Sun)19:18:10 No.209241293 ► >The great hall was packed for a feast. Students were joking, bantering and reminiscing as they enjoyed the most delectable food and drink the wizarding world had to offer. >"AHEM... *tink tink*... please, everyone, I have a few announcements to make," Dumbledore declared. The students turned their attention to the podium. >"First off I would like to remind everyone that BLACK magic is forbidden at Hogwarts," he said while staring directly at Snape. >"The DARK arts may seem alluring to PRIMITIVE and BESTIAL minds, but we are civilized folk. Keep your thoughts pure, keep them WHITE as snow, lest they be BLACKENED by the DARK arts." Snape's pupils widened, he began to tremble and sweat. >"Secondly, there is a... slithering issue that has beset Hogwarts." Dumbledore turned his oppressive gaze to Draco Malfoy. >"There is a group that has a lot of dirt on its scales. Whenever dark wizardry is afoot, they are involved. Nearly all of He-Who- Shall-Not-Be-Named's soldiers came from this group. Despite being only 13% of Hogwart's population they commit over 50% of all dark wizardry. They are a venomous, cold-blooded bunch, and due to the Ministry of Magic's anti-discrimination laws I can't say more than that. However, this den of vipers has not escaped my notice, and I will do everything in my power as Headmaster to make them suffer!" Malfoy lowered his head, his eyes becoming red and watery, barely containing his tears.

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