I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General - Images

Sorted By:

Every Major's Terrible

EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE TO THE TUNE OF GILBERT & SULLIVAN'S MODERN MAJOR-GENERAL SONG (WHICH YOU MAY KNOW FROM TOM LEHRER'S ELEMENTS. IF NOT, JUST HUM SUPERCAUFRAGIUSTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS.) PHILOSOPHY'S JUST MATH SANS RIGOR SENSE, AND PRACTICAUTY 2+ AND MATH'S JUST PHYSICS UNCONSTRAINED BY PRECEPTS OF REALITY. A BUSINESS MAJOR'S JUST A THING YOU GET SO YOU CAN GRADUATE AND CHEMISTRY'S FOR STAMP COLLECTORS HIGH ON METHYLACETATE WHY ANYONE WHO WANTS A JOB WOULD STUDY LIT'S A MYSTERY UNLESS THEIR ONLY OTHER CHOICE WERE SOMETHING LIKE ART HISTORY. A BA IN COMMUNICATIONS GUARANTEES THAT YOU'LL ACHIEVE A LITTLE LESS THAN IF YOU'D LEARNED TO UNDERWATER BASKET-WEAVE I'D RATHER EAT A FOWLER'S TOAD THAN MAJOR IN BIOLOGY, RIBBIT AND SOCIAL PSYCH IS WORSE THAN EITHER PSYCH OR SOCIOLOGY. THE THOUGHT OF PICKING ANY ONE OF THESE IS TOO UNBEARABLE. JUST PUT ME DOWN AS "UNDECIDED-EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE. NOW, IF YOU CAN'T PROGNOSTICATE, THAT'S OK IN SEISMOLOGY, BUT IF YOUR HINDSIGHT'S WEAK AS WELL, YOU'D BEST STICK TO THEOLOGY. XX CS WILL MAKE EACH DAYA QUEST TO FIND A MISSING CLOSE-PAREN. CCCCXCCCCX XXXX)))) VIROLOGY WILL GUARANTEE YOU'LL NEVER GET A HUG AGAIN. IT. PREPARES YOU FOR A LIFE OF FIGHTING WITH PCs NONSTOP. THEY SAY TO STUDY HISTORY OR FIND YOURSELF REPEATING IT, AS PRATCHETT SAID, "GEOGRAPHY'S JUST PHYSICS SLOWED WITH TREES ON TOP.* BUT ALL THAT IT PREPARES YOU FOR IS FORTY YEARS OF TEACHING IT. THOUGH PHYSICS SEEMS TO PROMISE YOU A RICHARD FEYNMAN-UKE CAREER, I RECOGNIZE MY FOUR- YEAR PLANS AT THIS POINT NOT REPAIRABLE, THE WIKI PAGE FOR "PHYSICS MAJOR" REDIRECTS TO ENGINEER." Physics major Trom wiped the polyprolin Engineer BUT PUT ME DOWN AS "UNDECIDED"-EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE. YES 1935 1969 1991 ASTRONOMERS ALL CRINGE WHEN THEY HEAR "SUPERMOON OR "ZODIAC AGRONOMY'S A NO-GO: I'M A HUGE AGOROPHOBIAC. WHILE PRE-MED GIVES a YOU TWITCHY-EYED poetry degree bespeaks OBSESSION WITH YOUR GPA, bewildering naïveté. BY DUBBING ECON THE "DISMAL'S FINE-ITS "DISMAL SCIENCE "SCIENCE" WHERE THEY ADHERENTS EXAGGERATE PATENTLY PREVARICATE. I'M TOO OPHIOPHOBIC AND I CAN'T STOMACH TO CONSIDER HERPETOLOGY, ANY PART OF GASTROENTEROLOGY. TV'S BEHIND THE RUSH INTO FORENSIC CRIMINOLOGY CSI: MIAMI (OR SO CLAIMS META-ACADEMIC EPIDEMIOLOGY) CST: IN TERMS OF CHOICES, I'D SAY ONLY SOPHIE'S WAS COMPARABLE. JUST PUT ME DOWN AS "UNDECIDED EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE!
EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE TO THE TUNE OF GILBERT & SULLIVAN'S MODERN MAJOR-GENERAL SONG (WHICH YOU MAY KNOW FROM TOM LEHRER'S ELEMENTS. IF NOT, JUST HUM SUPERCAUFRAGIUSTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS.) PHILOSOPHY'S JUST MATH SANS RIGOR SENSE, AND PRACTICAUTY 2+ AND MATH'S JUST PHYSICS UNCONSTRAINED BY PRECEPTS OF REALITY. A BUSINESS MAJOR'S JUST A THING YOU GET SO YOU CAN GRADUATE AND CHEMISTRY'S FOR STAMP COLLECTORS HIGH ON METHYLACETATE WHY ANYONE WHO WANTS A JOB WOULD STUDY LIT'S A MYSTERY UNLESS THEIR ONLY OTHER CHOICE WERE SOMETHING LIKE ART HISTORY. A BA IN COMMUNICATIONS GUARANTEES THAT YOU'LL ACHIEVE A LITTLE LESS THAN IF YOU'D LEARNED TO UNDERWATER BASKET-WEAVE I'D RATHER EAT A FOWLER'S TOAD THAN MAJOR IN BIOLOGY, RIBBIT AND SOCIAL PSYCH IS WORSE THAN EITHER PSYCH OR SOCIOLOGY. THE THOUGHT OF PICKING ANY ONE OF THESE IS TOO UNBEARABLE. JUST PUT ME DOWN AS "UNDECIDED-EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE. NOW, IF YOU CAN'T PROGNOSTICATE, THAT'S OK IN SEISMOLOGY, BUT IF YOUR HINDSIGHT'S WEAK AS WELL, YOU'D BEST STICK TO THEOLOGY. XX CS WILL MAKE EACH DAYA QUEST TO FIND A MISSING CLOSE-PAREN. CCCCXCCCCX XXXX)))) VIROLOGY WILL GUARANTEE YOU'LL NEVER GET A HUG AGAIN. IT. PREPARES YOU FOR A LIFE OF FIGHTING WITH PCs NONSTOP. THEY SAY TO STUDY HISTORY OR FIND YOURSELF REPEATING IT, AS PRATCHETT SAID, "GEOGRAPHY'S JUST PHYSICS SLOWED WITH TREES ON TOP.* BUT ALL THAT IT PREPARES YOU FOR IS FORTY YEARS OF TEACHING IT. THOUGH PHYSICS SEEMS TO PROMISE YOU A RICHARD FEYNMAN-UKE CAREER, I RECOGNIZE MY FOUR- YEAR PLANS AT THIS POINT NOT REPAIRABLE, THE WIKI PAGE FOR "PHYSICS MAJOR" REDIRECTS TO ENGINEER." Physics major Trom wiped the polyprolin Engineer BUT PUT ME DOWN AS "UNDECIDED"-EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE. YES 1935 1969 1991 ASTRONOMERS ALL CRINGE WHEN THEY HEAR "SUPERMOON OR "ZODIAC AGRONOMY'S A NO-GO: I'M A HUGE AGOROPHOBIAC. WHILE PRE-MED GIVES a YOU TWITCHY-EYED poetry degree bespeaks OBSESSION WITH YOUR GPA, bewildering naïveté. BY DUBBING ECON THE "DISMAL'S FINE-ITS "DISMAL SCIENCE "SCIENCE" WHERE THEY ADHERENTS EXAGGERATE PATENTLY PREVARICATE. I'M TOO OPHIOPHOBIC AND I CAN'T STOMACH TO CONSIDER HERPETOLOGY, ANY PART OF GASTROENTEROLOGY. TV'S BEHIND THE RUSH INTO FORENSIC CRIMINOLOGY CSI: MIAMI (OR SO CLAIMS META-ACADEMIC EPIDEMIOLOGY) CST: IN TERMS OF CHOICES, I'D SAY ONLY SOPHIE'S WAS COMPARABLE. JUST PUT ME DOWN AS "UNDECIDED EVERY MAJOR'S TERRIBLE!

I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General
comic modern major-general college majors