Submission 3,971

Chelsey Ballarte @ChelseyBallarte Literally all I do in NASA public affairs: Not aliens Glue back toy rocket fins kids ripped off Sticker passer outer "Where can I see launch in (random city)" "idk" *gestures broadly at next launch date* Live stream tech support, typically at 4 a.m. Regularly at launch pics Amy Snyder Hale @planetmort Nov 19 Literally all I do as a NASA engineer: Not aliens Meetings Power Point More meetings Still not aliens *curses at MlICE No, the Moon landing was not fake More Power Pointz *OMG that image is so cool* More meetings. twitter.com/noisyastronome... 8:04 AM Nov 20, 2019 Twitter Web App

Payton Barnwell @PaytonBarnwell Literally all I do as a SpaceShip Engineer: "No, it isn't all rocket science" *Hides Wikipedia on 3rd monitor* Cry in MATLAB Excel Meetings Coffee More coffee Look at SpaceShip that has BEEN TO FRICKIN SPACE Improve said SpaceShip "No, they aren't all Shuttles" Chelsey Ballarte @ChelseyBallarte Nov 20 Literally all I do in NASA public affairs: Not aliens Glue back toy rocket fins kids ripped off Sticker passer outer "Where can I see launch in (random city)" "idk" *gestures broadly at next launch date* Live stream tech support, typically at 4 a.m. Regularly at launch pics twitter.com/planetmort/sta... 8:49 AM Nov 20, 2019 Twitter for Android

Kattrin Bee @KattrinBee Literally all I do as a bedside nurse: You passed gas... yay When was the last time you pooped Dilaudid isn't due yet You CAN put THAT in the urinal yourself I don't know when they're rounding I'll be back with the Sierra Mist pumpkin spice pegasus, md @raw_em_md Nov 19 Literally all I do as an ER doctor What brings you in When did it start? What's a while? The whole time? 5 years? Oh okay So when did it start? No, this time. And then? When did THAT start? Did you tell your doctor? Your appointment is Friday? Did you take your meds? Why not? twitter.com/kenlacovara/st... 7:46 PM Nov 19, 2019 Twitter for iPhone

lululemon @lululemon Literally all I do working at lululemon is wear: Mon: Black stretchy pants Tues: Navy stretchy pants Weds: Stretchy pants with a button (big presentation) Thurs: Stretchy pants with a drawstring (felt cute) Fri: Black stretchy pants (day) velvet black stretchy pants (date night) 10:02 AM Nov 20, 2019 Twitter for iPhone

Suzanne Huggins @PSSuzanne Literally all I do as a cat-parent: No. No. No it's not suppertime yet No. I said NO! No. No. Stop chewing that No. No. For the millionth time, get off the table! No. No. Ooooh, your snuggles are the best Omar Nasr H @thenextmusk 7h Litterally all I do as a developer No. No. No I can't add this feature mid sprint No Please don't make me support IE11. No It's not production ready. I only had time to develop a simple PoC No I don't want to go to that meeting twitter.com/roborobbins/st... 1:16 PM Nov 21, 2019 Twitter for Android >

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About

Literally All I Do as an Attorney is a phrasal template in which people make jokes about different professions. The format follows the template: "Literally all I do as an [X]."

Origin

On November 13th, 2019, Twitter ^[1] user @FaciePrima tweeted, "Literally all I do as an attorney: No. No. Seriously, no. Like, how did you even think this was a good idea. Stop immediately. No, that doesn't make it okay, either. No. Stop. Stop it, you can’t do that. No." The tweet received more than 14,000 likes and 1,600 retweets in less than two weeks (shown below).

FP @FaciePrima Literally all I do as an attorney: No. No. Seriously, no. Like, how did you even think this was a good idea. Stop immediately No, that doesn't make it okay, either. No. Stop Stop it, you can't do that. No. 5:14 PM Nov 13, 2019 Twitter for iPhone

Spread

Over the next few days, people shared the original tweet and used the template to joke about different professions. For example, on November 15th, Twitter^[2] user @cullenroche tweeted, "Literally all I do as an investment advisor: No. No. Don't buy that. No, the Fed's decision doesn't matter. No. No, CNBC doesn't have good ideas.
No. Stop immediately. No, that doesn't make it okay, either.
No. Stop, don't do that. No." The tweet received more than 2,000 likes and 190 retweets in less than one week (shown below, left).

Paleontologist Kenneth Lacovara tweeted,^[3] "Literally, all I do as a paleontologist: Pretty sure that’s not a fossil That’s not a fossil either That’s a rock That’s also a rock Jurassic Park can’t happen That’s a rusty crescent wrench It’s not like Ross on Friends Still a rock Archeology is different Fine, it’s a fossil." The tweet received more than 4,700 likes and 490 retweets in less than three days (shown below, center).

That day, Monica Lewinsky, in a tweet^[4] joking about her affair with President Bill Clinton, tweeted, "literally, all i do as a former WH intern: just kidding." The tweet received more than 17,000 likes and 900 retweets in less than three days (shown below, right).

Cullen Roche @cullenroche Literally all I do as an investment advisor: No. No. Don't buy that No, the Fed's decision doesn't matter. No. No, CNBC doesn't have good ideas. No. Stop immediately. No, that doesn't make it okay, either. No. Stop, don't do that. No. FP @FaciePrima Nov 13 Literally all I do as an attorney: No. No. Seriously, no. Like, how did you even think this was a good idea. Stop immediately. No, that doesn't make it okay, either. No. Stop Stop it, you can't do that. No. 8:37 AM Nov 15, 2019 Tweet Deck

Kenneth Lacovara @kenlacovara Literally, all I do as a paleontologist: Pretty sure that's not a fossil That's not a fossil either That's a rock That's also a rock Jurassic Park can't happen That's a rusty crescent wrench It's not like Ross on Friends Still a rock Archeology is different Fine, it's a fossil Sarah Parcak @indyfromspace Nov 18 Literally all I do as an archaeologist: Not aliens Still not aliens Erm, unsure, probably ritual in nature Not aliens No, I don't want to know about the pottery backlog Who stole my trowel? No, we don't walk on the baulk No aliens, still My section is perfect Never aliens twitter.com/BrianCAlbrecht... 7:31 PM Nov 18, 2019 Twitter for iPhone

Monica Lewinsky @MonicaLewinsky literally, all i do as a former WH intern: just kidding. @kenlacovara Nov 18 Kenneth Lacovara Literally, all I do as a paleontologist: Pretty sure that's not a fossil That's not a fossil either That's a rock That's also a rock Jurassic Park can't happen That's a rusty crescent wrench It's not like Ross on Friends Still a rock Archeology is different Fine, it's a fossil twitter.com/indyfromspace/... 7:45 PM Nov 18, 2019 Twitter for iPhone

Various Examples

Kidz Bop Kimeko @KimekoM Literally all I do as a social media editor: I already saw that meme. No, I can't make this go viral. RT'd Yes, they tweeted at us. It's NBD That won't resonate with our audience. THE ALGORITHM. Susan Gonzalez Literally all I do as a national news digital producer: @TheNewsan23h I already posted that online. That's not breaking news. Livestream is up Yes, I can share that story. I am going to rewrite these stories for web. Stop writing boring headlines for web I am not IT Everything is on fire. twitter.com/rtdna/status/1... 2:24 PM Nov 20, 2019 Twitter for iPhone

Search Interest

Not Available.

External References

^[1] Twitter – @FaciePrima's Tweet

^[2] Twitter – @cullenroche's Tweet

^[3] Twitter – @kenlacovara's Tweet

^[4] Twitter – @MonicaLewinsky's Tweet

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Literally All I Do as an Attorney

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